Tuesday, April 02, 2013
So I've been "re"-active on SP for almost 2 months now and have lost 5 lbs. Although I've significantly increased my activity level and have been much more mindful of calories, this meagre loss is somewhat disappointing. I've re-focused to become process driven, for long term success and it's taken a LOT of determination not to let the scales get to me. So you can imagine my delight when I discovered the reports feature on SP!
Daily Calorie Differential :) It allows you to see calories used vis a vis calories consumed. I've been using this not in a neurotic "better do 15 more minutes of cardio" kind of way, but as a guide to how I'm progressing, to make sure I'm never in the pink.
Calorie Differential Over Time :) It does the same as above, but shows you how you do over time. This showed me the BIG picture (no pun intended). I could see that although I am consistently coming under on a daily basis, the calorie deficit just isn't enough over a week. If I want to see better results, I need to focus on the week as well as the day.
I've told so many people about SparkPeople in the last two months because the resources on here are FANTASTIC!!!!! I'm so grateful to have this resource available to me.
Good luck to every Spark Person out there, who is on the journey to reaching their goals!
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
So again, another Spark blogger has inspired some thinking. For a while now I've been pestered by a nagging self doubt: is pursuing a healthier lifestyle really just a disdain for who I am now?
Let me clarify, I like who I am. I love my life. I never hold off on pursuing dreams until I've reached a goal weight, if it's worth doing, it's worth doing NOW. BUT, I often feel judged. Whether it's real or just in my head as I suspect it sometimes is, people think less of me for being heavy (277 lbs) and I resent them bitterly for it.
I've tried to imagine what they think of me: "she must drink a LOT of beer to be that size", "guess she eats a LOT of potato chips in front of the tv", "her house must be a sty", "maybe if she cooked once in a while" - the list really is endless.
Then I think of my defense: I rarely drink anything other than water, ;milk, and 1 diet coke a day. I add bran to my cereal! We have chip night once a week! My house isn 't Martha Stewart perfect but it's liveable and I cook at least 5 nights a week, if not 6 and sometimes even 7.
It recently occurred to me that this game is holding me back. (It was a "duh!" moment) For one, people are not likely judging me as harshly as I am judging myself. That's just it, I'm projecting the self doubt I have. This game is preventing me from taking a honest and encompassing look at my lifestyle and from making real changes. I grew up in a highly critical family and community, and yes my weight was the topic of much criticism, I come by these suspicions honestly! It's just that now is the time to confront the voices in my head, to replace them with a new mantra founded in the present.
I'm learning to accept myself NOW, in the PAST, and in the FUTURE. Pursuing a healthier lifestyle isn't self-betrayal, it isn't "giving in" to those voices (real or imagined). I admit I am still working on the notion, but I am learning self acceptance. I am replacing those voices in my head.
Friday, March 08, 2013
So I've been "doing" SparkPeople for a couple of weeks now and the scale is not budging. At all. Actually, it is - it goes down 2 pounds, then back up two pounds. In two weeks, I think I've lost less than a pound. It's frustrating. It's tempting to just give up.
Well, not really. Because the only thing more depressing than being at this (lack of) fitness level would be not working towards a higher fitness level. After reading Pixielicous's blog today about loving yourself, I have new perspective.
A) I always, ALWAYS, emphasize to my kids it's not about thinness, it's about health. Yes, a healthy weight is a part of physical fitness, but eating healthily and consistent exercise are greater indicators of health.
B) I'm going to use this opportunity to re-evaluate my efforts. Am I exercising effectively? Drinking enough water? Snacking more than I'm admitting too? Sleep? Yeah, always need more sleep, no need for too much introspection there.
I feel good when I make healthy choices, like exercising and eating healthy foods. So if the scale really is about my weight and not my worth, maybe I need to just take it for what it is - just ONE of the tools I use to measure my fitness.
Saturday, February 23, 2013
My son asked me about Spark Points the other day, he didn't understand why I would care if they didn't lead to some material gain - for him that would mean a new Lego set or maybe a video game. I had really never thought about Spark Points with any determination, but as I explained it to him it occured to me that:
Spark Points are important b/c they are a way to measure healthy choices. Tracking food, drinking water, exercising have all been proven to contribute to increased fitness. However, reading articles on fitness and nutrition, listening to a radio show, etc. also support a healthy lifestyle by increasing my awareness. Information is power! My favourite SP feature is that it gives us the information to help us achieve our goals and the tools for measuring our progress: it becomes cyclical as each positively impacts the other.
What I didn't share with my son is the strange smugness I feel when I reach a new level or achieve a trophy ;)
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