Thursday, January 22, 2009
Yesterday was a really good day until about 5 pm. My boys asked for CHEESE STICKS. I have been able to control and avoid every temptation for 14 weeks until the dreaded cheese stck request. I just checked out of the body and scarfed down 4 of them before I knew what had hit me. As with every time I fell before, as soon as the last bite was swallowed I began beating myself up and this mentality seems to last for days. I just get so pissed at myself and want to hide, scream, cry, throw up, give up. It's like this ongoing pitty party for me. I hate it. I will recover, I have to. I have come too far this time to throw it all away over some stupid cheese sticks and poor planning on my part.