Tuesday, March 19, 2013
So tonight I had dinner with a friend. She just lost her sister a few weeks ago, and I didn't know the reasons behind it.
I'm a person who has to know facts so I can reason why things happen. I like to reason, and then say to myself, "Well that can't happen to me because . . . blah, blah, blah!" It makes me feel safe to reason away the bad things.
When my younger sister died a few years ago at the age of 46, we were not sure of the cause. She was severely handicapped from birth, and I reasoned (as I'm sure my parents did as well) that she had a shorter life expectancy due to her limitations. She was sedentary, never having been able to walk. Through my grief, I reasoned, "I'm not sedentary and I don't life my life in a wheelchair. I should be o.k."
When my brother died, it was colon cancer. It was tragic, and it was awful. Upon his diagnosis, I immediately arranged a colonoscopy. I spent the next eight months watching it destroy and eventually take his life, taking a piece of me with him. I reasoned . . . "You had a colonoscopy, you're o.k."
My friend shared with me that her sister was morbidly obese, something I never knew. She was not mobile, and for the last few years she was battling infections in her legs. She had a wonderful caring husband who, along with other caregivers, took care of her. He awoke one morning and went about his day, going in to give her medication and found that she had passed away.
Very sad, and yet this is one that I cannot completely reason away for myself. It's not my situation today, but sadly, it's not out of the realm of possibility for the girl who diets and then gains back more than is lost time and time again.
This is precisely the reason that I cannot give up. I cannot become that person . . . and yet I could become that person. It's a fragile existence. It's a great reminder as to why this journey is so important.
Reasoning . . . It could have just as easily been you. If you slip, look where you could be!
Reasoning . . . You have lost over 45 pounds in 10 months, and more importantly, you have kept it off! You are doing great.
I am a person who reasons for a reason. I believe you have to move forward with a very close eye on where you've been, and how much worse it could be. It's like the old saying goes . . . Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.
Thursday, March 14, 2013
So I got this really nice goodie message from someone today and it really made my day. It was the Happy Face goodie that I got from JENNIK2. Thank you, girl!
I won't tell you the message, but it really made me think. I always give off this great motivation, but lately I don't seem to be producing much on the scale. I have so many positives to celebrate. I've lost over 40 pounds. I did not gain over the holidays. I'm learning to maintain what I've lost. I've continued to "talk" like I'm in this game, but I honesty have felt that I need to walk the walk to move to the next level, hit that 50 mark, hit that 60 mark and just keep moving forward.
My focus for the Biggest Loser Challenge is going to be to Walk the Talk. I need to really step it up for this challenge and not just talk like I've got this down, but get back to the practice of making some changes.
My goals for this challenge are to Walk the Talk . . . to be sure that my actions match my words.
1) To track my food daily.
2) To exercise weekly.
3) To drink more water.
4) To connect with my teammates.
5) To be more creative with my food choices.
Thank you, JENNIK2! You had no idea that one little Goodie Message would be my stepping off point for what will hopefully be success moving forward.
I gotta go walk the talk now . . .
Thursday, March 07, 2013
I've been complacent too long!
I've been procrastinating!
I've been hovering between the 45 and 50 mark for weeks, and I need to move forward. And so I have two great challenges in the works here on SparkPeople . . . The Biggest Loser Challenge . . . Rockin' it with the Red Team again, and the Springing to Action Challenge, which I've joined in Week 3.
The timing is perfect, as Springing to Actions' challenge this week was to create a vision board . . . a collage of what I want to accomplish during the spring, and where I want to be when summer approaches.
Here is my board. It is separated into three sections . . . what I've got, what I need and what I want.
What I've got is easy. I have family and friends. I have a crafty life . . . which I crave. I have music and entertainment, and if there is one thing that I've conquered since last May when I started this journey, it is WATER! I've got the water thing down.
Needs and wants are tough. It is hard to discern between the two. I did the best that I could to outline that I need to eat healthier and make better choices. First and foremost, I need to feel stronger. I need to exercise and build muscle, no matter how difficult I find that process to be . . . I need to get into the kitchen and make some creative dishes.
What I want . . . a chance! I want to be that person that craves exercise. I have never been that person. I want peace. I will never have peace until I conquer my battles with my health and weight.
These two challenges could not come at a better time. I am at a point where I need to move forward, and my habits are beginning to move backward.
It stops here!
Enough is enough.
Friday, December 07, 2012
Day 200 has come and gone!
If you’ve paid attention over the last few months, I used to say it was “Day ___ of consecutive days on plan.” However, I went on vacation and took a few days to just enjoy life without counting. I realized I could no longer say “Day ___ of consecutive days on plan.” I felt sad. I felt defeated. I felt like I failed. But the reality is that life happens. And while it is great to have consecutive days on plan, I kind of felt like I was setting myself up for complete and total failure.
So today is Day 204 of my Life-long Journey of Change! And indeed it has been a journey of change. In 204 days I have lost 45 pounds. I have kept it off. I have vacationed and not gained. I have thrown away large clothing because I am not going to need them again. I have vowed to not gain over the holidays. I have changed my eating habits. I have changed my sleeping habits. I am a healthier person today than I was 204 days ago.
My latest revelation in the journey came around the time I went on vacation. When you lose weight, the goal is to lose what you need to lose. Whether it is to lose 20 pounds or 120 pounds, the goal is the same. But those of us who have to lose 120 pounds struggle when we’re not losing. When you hit that first plateau, it is defeating to work hard and look at numbers on the scale that just don’t seem to add up. And, at the same time, it is a struggle to do the same things day after day after day to lose a pound or two a week. It just becomes old.
I returned from vacation and there was Thanksgiving, complete with all the trimmings . . . turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, pies and the appropriate pumpkin, apple and pecan goodies. So I didn’t lose that week. And really, what’s wrong with not losing? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING . . . provided I’m not gaining.
And what is next . . . the holiday season. Candies, cookies, sweet treats aplenty!
Think about this, if you will. The goal of just about every single weight loss plan is to lose weight. Once you lose the appropriate amount of weight, the next goal is to maintain that weight. If you have 20 or 40 pounds to lose, you can work to lose the weight and that next phase comes along pretty quickly. If you have 100 pounds to lose, you’re not going to hit that maintenance phase for quite some time and it all becomes very old. Throw a few plateaus in there and it becomes older than old.
So what is wrong with taking a break for a while and learning to maintain your new weight. It’s a weight you’re proud of, and to be bored and frustrated is not a good thing. So I decided to take a few weeks to maintain and begin to strategize for my next phase, whether it be 20 or 40 more pounds.
It may not be ideal for everyone, but this is going to be a life-long journey, so I need to learn to maintain now, not later. Because what if later never comes? What if I get so frustrated when the scale isn’t moving, that I give up. I’ve given up before, and I'm NOT going to give up this time.
I have my two books that I'm reading . . . I have a Fit Bit that I'm trying out . . . and I have my blue light to combat Seasonal Affective Disorder. I definitely have strategy. And the key is . . . I've not gained back anything I've lost.
So Day 204 of a Life-long Journey of Change is here! I am celebrating the positives and prepping for some new strategies to reach some new goals. It's all good.
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