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I've spent the past 6 months of my life pretty much at a stand still. I'm not sure why or what happened. I'm just tired of it. For awhile there my entire life revolved around losing weight. It was literally all I could think about it. It consumed every aspect of my life. I was constantly thinking about food and exercise like it was all my life consisted of. Once I realized that I was becoming obsessed with it...instead of trying to not make it such an exteme priority...I instead made it not a priority. Weird how that happened huh? And today I just realized this. I need to vent...and I need to share it with people who understand what I'm going through. People who get how counting calories..and working out can consume you're life. How once you reach that point where you want to lose weight...that it's ALL you can think of. I hope some people can relate to that. I realized today...and this is because I felt terrible. I started TOM today...and ever since I stopped exercising so frequently...my first 2 days of TOM are just TERRIBLE. It was like it was when I first got TOM. Pains in my stomach too the point that I can't even stand up straight. Back aches...and considering I already have back issues it just makes it ten times worse. Nonetheless not a good day. Anyways back to my point. I realized today that for the past few weeks I was beginning to revert into old habits. In a way I was becoming the OLD me. The girl I NEVER want to be again. Spending WAY too much time in bed...wasting my life away. You see...before when I weighed nearly 300 pounds that's all I would do. Lay in bed. All weekend long I would sleep. I would shut my door and just try to forget this person I had become. This person I hate. And here I am...becoming slowly that person again. What the heck is up with that? I know that I'm a total work in progress. We all are...trying to improve our bad habits, exteriors...just trying to be better people on the inside & out. I got too a point where I somewhat liked the person on the outside...and then since I didn't work on the inside...just started to go downhill once again. 
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NATURALSOAPGIRL
8/14/2008 1:52AM
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Hey Gina. I'm glad someone finally addressed this issue. I keep thinking that I feel as though my day is spent obsessing about calories, points, what I should and shouldn't be doing or eating or even thinking! It comes down to one simple thing. It needs to be ingrained in us. Like you said - recreating a new you. It can't be the "I'm a fat girl on a diet" mentality anymore. Now it needs to be "I'm a healthy girl who's putting forth a good effort to stay healthy and encourage others in the same thing." You can do this Gina. We all need to face our fears at some point. You just did. You don't ever want to slip back into being the old Gina. Go Girl!! Sarah Report Inappropriate Comment |
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TAMERBAMER2001
8/13/2008 4:01PM
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Gina, you had better get back in there or you are going to be in my boat. I lost 130 lbs and then got so tired of logging my food worrying about eating. Worrying about exercise that after my father in-law passed I quit doing everything. I quit being obsessed about losing weight. Now I am up 50 lbs and it came back very quick in just 7 months. I went back to my old habits. Now I have to start again with all I learned on my journey and try to get back on the wagon. Good luck and hang in there!!!
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LUCKY8GAL
8/13/2008 2:44PM
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Hang in there. Tomorrows a new day. 
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ZIRCADIA
8/5/2008 10:47PM
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It's hard to not be obsessed while at the same time being committed and focused. It's something that I've had on my mind this whole time. Now I've met my goal and am trying this maintaining thing and I'm working to make the transition from counting every calorie to knowing what healthy choices each day add up to the result I want. You know? *HUGS* I'm sorry you're not happy with so many aspects of your life right now -- but you know you can change these things. :) You of all people know how capable we are of changing our destinies. :D Just keep listening to your heart telling you what you really want and go for it! And the BEING HEALTHY focus sounds like a good track to take beginning your self redesign. *HUGS* GOOD LUCK AND KEEP us updated. We want to help support you through this!! OK?
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GENIADR
8/5/2008 1:07PM
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Good Afternoon Gina ( love the name)  Good for you recognizing the issue, I am only 40 lbs into my journey and I can see me getting a little obsessed at times. I am so inspired by you, so when you are feeling down think of all the people you inspire and you know where you can always find support. Your before and after pictures are AMAZING Good luck to you in all the area's of your life, they just fall into place one thing at a time. Thanks Genia 
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NOMOREFATMOM
8/5/2008 8:34AM
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Your right...it took your TOM to admit to yourself that you aren't happy. Being hormonal or whatever can bring out the emotions we feel everyday -- its just with TOM and that -- there just isn't enough room in us to hold it all in anymore. It has to come out. I think its very healthy...taking stock of yourself is always healthy. You know where and when you fell off the healthy lifestyle. And you know what you need to do to get back on. I'm pulling for you. And looking to rededicate myself to my own goals. Encouragement, motivation, and swift kick in the big girl panties whenever you need it...I hope for the same from you! Melissa Day #17 Smoke Free Report Inappropriate Comment |
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TRECECOOKS
8/4/2008 12:40PM
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Breathe in, breathe out, now - re-invent yourself. Use your imagination!!
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GI..GI..GINA!
8/4/2008 7:17AM
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I don't feel that my hormone's wrote this....at all. I've felt this way for some time...it just took my crazy hormone's for me to get the nerve to actually write it. It's not a good thing in my opinion...when you become obsessed with losing weight. When ALL you can think about is your next meal, did you go over your calories, what exercise you will do this week. That's not really focusing on getting healthy but just dropping pounds. Now I'm trying to focus on getting healthy though & not so much in dropping the weight. If I just eat healthy...exercise at least 30 minutes daily...the rest will slowly but surely fall into place.
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CHOC0LATE
8/3/2008 9:48PM
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 I'm right there next to ya in the "not happy" with anything boat! In fact I could have written this exact blog today myself! I also struggle with letting this consume me, than backing off, and than feeling like a failure, getting back to it and than feeling like a compulsive exercise and fitness freak! I figured out I'm an all or nothing type person. And I jump in with both feet, and get out with both feet as well. But is that such a bad thing? Nah, it's a good focus. We're not focused on doing drugs, or going out drinking, we're trying to become and stay healthy. How can that ever be wrong, right?  Plus, you didn't really write this, your hormone's did. I also get extremely into my "not happiness" right around TOM too. Just another thing mother nature blessed us with I guess. Anyway, sorry I can't offer much help, because I'm just as irritated with myself as you are! I just wanted to pop in and let you know I feel the exact same way!
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Well I've already pronounced by undying devotion to this website and the chica that created it. I just adore everything about it. The recipes, the feedback on new foods, just EVERYTHING! I saw that they came out with a new cookbook a few weeks ago...and just did not want to spend the money on it. Well I was bored on my lunch break today (2 hours, blah!) and I went to books a million...Well there it was! On sale! Had to have it! I'll keep you updated on what I think. :)
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TXDRAGNFLY
8/3/2008 11:33AM
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Yes. I have seen the book. Let me know if it's any good.
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GAAZELEA
7/30/2008 4:58PM
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I love the HG website too. I have the cookbook and its wonderful! Try the caramel pumpkin muffins on pg. 212, they are fantastic. Enjoy your cookbook and congrats on your weightloss! Belle Comment edited on: 7/30/2008 4:57:08 PM Report Inappropriate Comment |
