Friday, December 09, 2011
Jail...my final exam...and the Big Blue H...
This is about the good , the bad, and the ugly...OR
it is the good news, the great news, and the sad news...
The good news is(this deals with the BAD too)...my half-BIL Stupid Steve, lovingly referred to as SS...is in JAIL...
Yippee-kay-yeah for the local law enforcement! (Round of applause here.)
Don't know or care how/why he got picked up. I am relieved when I know WHERE he is. He is in for apparently 30 days...won't be his first Christmas in jail...sadly, probably not the last either.
DH was scheduled to be released from the hospital on Wednesday, provided that I passed my care-giving class. And pass the home assessment that I wasn't aware of until Tuesday evening. Remember, my house became the Wreck of the Hesperus during my DH's hospital stay.
I did not live like that when I was single. However, I have noticed, that upon marriage, and increasingly, with each additional child...well, simply put...my standards of what is clean, have not only slipped, but plummeted! This is the UGLY part of this...
So we cut our Tuesday evening visit short, so we could straighten up the Wreck. My kids were flying around like little worker bees.
Wednesday morning I re-arranged the living room furniture to make room for the hospital bed, power wheel chair, bath bench, etc.
I like the bed(functionally), though wish it came with a more high end designer look. Don't they realize that some people have to put these in the living room? I think I will try to decorate it. I am giving up the full size Christmas tree for the ugly bed. I have the Charlie Brown Tree on the coffee table. *sigh*
After I took delivery of the designer bed, I went to the hospital to take my class. The PT showed me what DH can and can't do. It was simple really. I just had to show the PT that I could transfer DH from the wheelchair, to the walker, to the car. Then we went home for the final exam...I had to show the PT that I could get DH from the car, up the steps, and into the house. Then she had to check out his living space--bed, bathroom, kitchen. She loved the designer bed...asked where she could get one like it. LOL After about 20 minutes, she determined that I, and our house, passed the final exam. This is the GREAT news...we went back to the hospital, where he was officially discharged.
The SAD part of this deals with my MIL...she finally went to see DH at the hospital the day before he was discharged. Her excuse for not going to see him...are you ready for this...she didn't know where the hospital was. I didn't say a word, though I am certain she could tell by the look on my face, I thought that was a lame excuse. So she added, that she didn't have internet to look it up. Still lame, in my opinion. She could have used her other son's internet--he is 40 and lives in her basement, urinates in milk jugs because he is too lazy to go upstairs to the bathroom. Nothing wrong with that, I am just saying. She could have went to the library. She could have went to a store and just looked at a map. She could have called the hospital or ME. She lives 11 miles from from the hospital. She is 1/4 mile from a major state route. Literally, she made one left and one right turn to get there. She was closer than I was. She could have driven to the state route and followed the BIG BLUE H signs. You don't even have to speak English in this country to locate a hospital! Truth be told, she was probably visiting SS in JAIL.
All I can say about her is...she is consistent...she never fails to disappoint.
I am off to go do some decorating!
Sunday, December 04, 2011
First of all, I want to thank all my Spark buds for all the thoughts and prayers for my DH. It is overwhelming...in a good way...I feel loved. I wish I had time to respond to everyone individually. I am way behind in my Spark online activities...especially reading blogs, responding to Sparkmail, and sending goodies. Please know I am not ignoring you. I read a lot of friend's blogs and try to comment on most. Even if it is just a couple of words or an emotioncon. I do that just so you know that I CARE. I really do. I try to be a positive force example for my children. I hate the word "can't". It is like fingernails on a chalkboard to me. So I don't want to say I "can't" get caught up on my Spark stuff.
This whole ordeal with DH is really cramping my Spark time. So please be patient with me. I am not deleting any mail. I promise, I WILL read everything. I just may not have the time to respond to everything. Especially since I will be using my phone more for reading blogs and mail, etc. It is more difficult for me to see on my phone. I need new glasses. Man, it suc>s to get old. Well, it beats the alternative, I guess. My birthday is in about 2 weeks...can you tell?
Update on DH...
He was moved to the rehab floor. He is in PT and OT virtually all day. He is progressing very well. He is still getting great drugs for the pain...he says it reminds him of his 20's. Whoa! I think the drugs were a lot safer then.
My MIL STILL has not been to see him. He has been there 8 days. She lives closer to the hospital than I do. Don't know or care what her excuse is, really.
While I am at work, DH emails me through out the day. Friday, he sent me an email asking if I could take a class for care-giving on next Wednesday. My first thought was...WTH...I need to take a class on how to CARE? I was a little insulted. I spend most of my time at the hospital. I get my children on the bus, go to the hospital, then to work, get my children off the bus, and back to the hospital, The only thing I do at home is sleep and shower. And my house looks like The Wreck of the Hesperus. I don't know how it got this way...all we do is sleep here.
So he explains to me, that the class is to show me HOW to care for him PHYSICALLY. OH OK. I am glad we got that straight.
So please know that, even though it may seem that I am absent, yes, I truly CARE about YOU too!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
My bra strap got stuck on my tiara--please help!
It all started with the free bird last week...
The turkey my employer gave me for Thanksgiving gave me fits coming out of the hot oven. I pulled a muscle in my back wrestling that dumb bird to the counter top! No serious injury, me, I mean…the bird was dead. I did ask myself if I could get Worker’s Comp since my employer gave me the bird. I doubt it.
I did great on Thanksgiving and Black Friday, as far as my fitness and food. I stayed in range, no problem. I remember thinking, if this was the test, I passed with flying colors.
My back was fine by Friday. At this point the tiara is still firmly planted on my crown.
Saturday was THE big game…Ohio State @ Michigan.
It was really nice out that day. And DH decided to take down 2 trees in the back yard that were fairly close to the house. I usually help him with the big ones. He knew I wanted to watch football, so he asked his stupid half brother, Steve to help him. This guy is 36 years old, irresponsible, convicted felon, only operating with half of the normal brain cells due to his drug habits.
But I am" too hard on him." I need to" give him a break because he has had a hard life".( his CHOICE, not mine) He has stolen property from us several times. My MIL expects me to" ignore it and share the wealth" because we are "lucky". I am not lucky, I work hard to have the material things. So yes, it angers me that I drag my happy a$$ to work everyday, pay taxes, to support Stupid Steve’s kids, then I am expected to ignore his stealing, and " loan" him money too!
OK, my in-laws sometimes cause my tiara to slip. I have considered wrapping it around their necks or poking them in the eyes with it.
So my DD and I are watching the game on TV. We are wearing our matching Michigan sweatshirts. My DD is a cheerleader, so you must show your S P I R I T. I was sporting my NEW EXTRA SMALL Michigan sweatshirt. I may be sorry for this later in the day…
The two trees are close to the house, so DH wants to top them first, then take down the trunks. He climbs the tree, cuts the high branches first. I can feel the ground shake when the branches hit the ground. It was half time. I just happened to look out the window…
I saw my DH faced down in the dirt with Stupid Steve rubbing his back. I felt like I had swallowed my heart. I ran to him, climbing through a maze of tree branches to get to him. It had been at least 5 minutes since I had felt the last limb fall, so I don’t know when Stupid Steve was going to come and get me. DH was conscious, but having difficulty breathing. The first thing he said to me was" I can move my toes". You see, he sells durable medical equipment. He specializes in custom wheelchairs…think Christopher Reeve here. I tell SS to call 911. He is now on the other side of the tree, playing with his phone. He says "he just got the wind knocked out of him." I said "call 911." He said "what town is this, what is the address." I told him. He said "we should use the house phone." I said "we don’t have a land line anymore. Call 911." He said "where are we?" I said "do I need to go get my phone…call 911!" He finally called. I asked SS what happened. He said DH was standing on the branch of one tree, cutting a branch out of the other tree. When the branch fell it hit the limb he was on causing him to fall about 25 feet to the ground.
I told SS to clear the branches out of the way so the EMTs to get to him easier. He didn’t listen. He started pacing back and forth. When the first responder got here, I looked around and SS was gone. I found him pacing on the driveway. He told me that if a sheriff comes, he is giving them a different name, if they ask—he has outstanding arrest warrants. I was shocked--NOT. Guess that’s why he did not want to call 911. The thought of going to jail was more important than the safety of his brother.
At this point I hear the sirens, so I go around back, and realize SS did not move the branches. So I did. There went the same back muscle…ouch! I don't know or care where my tiara is at this point!
OK this is one of those times I feel like using that blasted tiara as a weapon!
It took awhile for the EMTs to get DH on the board and into the ambulance. I was inside preparing my 2 kids to go to the hospital.
Oh guess what, no sheriff deputy came-- darn it!
As soon as the ambulance pulls out of the driveway SS starts barking orders at me. "Just leave the kids here with me. I will finish cutting down the trees. Leave me DH’s car key so I can get home."
This is when I thought my head was going to explode!
I would not let this dumba$$ take care of my CAT, let alone my children.
He does not have a driver’s license, so I would not give him my car key.
He is a THIEF, so I would not leave him alone at my house.
Did I mention…I thought my head was going to explode. No tiara is going to hold it together!
I am trying to process my options in my head. I decide that he is just going to have to go with me to the hospital. That way, he could get medical attention after I beat the crap out of him. Which I now realize, he would have refused to go to the hospital. He once got arrested in an ER waiting room. My neighbor was on my porch, and could sense my stress. So he told SS that he had to leave. I told my neighbor that SS did not drive there, so he volunteered to take SS home. I was so relieved.
So we get to the ER waiting room…
good news…the game is on the TV…
bad news…we are wearing Michigan sweatshirts in a room full of scarlet and gray, including the Dr.s and nurses...
you see, we are fairly close to the OSU campus…so there are a lot of Buck Nuts here
Deep down I am very worried about DH because I don’t know the extent of his injuries. I want to protect my kids, so I keep it light, focus on the game.
We missed the entire 3rd quarter and part of the 4th quarter.
In case you missed it…Ohio State 34 Michigan 40…I’m just saying, that’s all.
We finally got to see DH and a doctor. The injuries…a collapsed lung, several broken ribs, broken left hip, broken left shoulder, broken pelvis. Yes, he broke his a$$. I know it sounds bad, but I feel blessed because it could have been much worse. He will be fine in 6-8 weeks. After the Buck Nut Dr. did the procedure to re-inflate his lung, I called my FIL and MIL. They are divorced. I have been on vacations with both of them, separately. So I can see how they could not live together. I would not want to live with either one of them. MIL already knew that DH fell out of the tree. SS lives with her. Shocking that he still lives with his mother, I know.
Sunday morning, DH is in the ICU. I walk in on a phone conversation between DH and MIL. She led him to believe that I never called her the day before. BITCH-- that’s all I’m saying about that.
I usually track all of my food for the day before breakfast. I didn’t on Sunday. When I sat down Sunday night to do it, I realized something. Healthy eating is a fully ingrained habit for me. You see, in the past, I would have grabbed anything sweet and salty and devoured it under such stress. Not this time. I only eat when I am hungry. It is a HEALTHY HABIT. I do not have to worry about it. It is now a part of me.
I did have a meltdown(no eating, just crying) when I got to work Monday morning. I think it was because I was away from my children for the first time since it happened. I didn’t have to pretend to be strong. I was worried. And I was wearing a bra that the band was too big, so the straps were getting on my last ever-loving nerve. When I got on Sparkpeople.com I realized I was" in the Spotlight" for the Winter challenge. I said "Oh crap, I am not in the mood to be a motivator, or a cheerleader today. God help me." Then I realized I just needed to pull my happy a$$ up by my bra straps and straighten my tiara. Why…because I am a Warrior!
I do need to get some new bras though, really!
Friday, November 11, 2011
This is just a reminder for me...to keep me on track...
Attitudes of a Warrior
I am a warrior... I act in spite of fear.
I am a warrior... I am willing to do whatever it takes.
I am a warrior... I do everything at 100%.
I am a warrior... I am willing to do what's "hard."
I am a warrior... I act in spite of my mood.
I am a warrior... I am bigger than any obstacle.
I am a warrior... I succeed in spite of anything.
I am a warrior... I never give up!
Way of the Warrior
I am a warrior...
I create every moment of my life.
My choices create my reality.
My response creates my outcome.
There is no "can't." I choose to or choose not to.
There is no "try", I do or do not do.
I am true to my own heart.
I speak my truth... with compassion.
I keep my commitments.
My word is law.
I approve of myself, now.
I don't have to please everybody.
I don't take anything personally.
I understand that how others judge me is about them.
I look 'em in the eye, I tell 'em who I am, and if they don't like it, eff 'em!
Am I a Spark success? Yes, healthy BMI in 299 days. I will not go back.
I am a Spark Warrior...I will go on and on, never quit
I am a Spark Princess...I will only do it when I want to, you can’t make me
I am a Spark Rebel...I don't have to go with the flow if I don't feel the need
I am a Spark Goddess...see the princess rule
But I am no Spark Nazi...thank you very much
Thursday, November 10, 2011
I got this from the 14-14-14 Mini-challenge from KANSASROSE67….
There are 14 days left before Thanksgiving. The mini-challenge:
~Eat under 1400 calories every one of those 14 days
~Run 14 miles every week during the challenge, no matter what the weather!
~Post a different status each of the 14 days naming something I'm thankful for.
My accountability will be that each day I'll edit this blog, telling how I did and adding an emoticon for each challenge met.
If anyone would like to join me in this mini-challenge, let me know and I'll do my best to support you! I am not a Spark Nazi...you do not have to run 14 miles...you may walk, or do 14 reps or 14 minutes of something. Whatever you want...make it your own. Have fun! And if you see that I'm slacking, feel free to give me a nudge (or a kick) in the right direction!
Day 1--November 10:
Under 1400 calories--1287
Thankful Status: We just lost a standing dead tree...I am thankful the wind didn't take it in the other direction onto the neighbor's house or my nephew's Porsche that had been parked in that very spot for 5 years up until last weekend...
Mileage for week: 4.2
Day 2--November 11:
Under 1400 calories-- 1388
Thankful Status: I am thankful for all Veterans because freedom is not free.
Mileage for week: 4.2+ 5.3
Day 3--November 12:
Under 1400 calories--1390
Thankful Status: I must attend a funeral today...I am thankful to be ALIVE and HEALTHY.
Mileage for week: 9.5+5.4
Day 4--November 13:
Under 1400 calories-- 1332
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for chainsaws and gasoline and the fact that DH is proficient with the saws. After 15 years of living in the woods, he better be.
Mileage for week: 14.9 +4.8
Day 5--November 14:
Under 1400 calories-- 1388
Thankful Status: It is raining here today. This reminds me that I am thankful for WATER. I like to use it to clean. I like it in the form of steam and ice too. I LOVE to drink it. And I am less likely to hit a deer on the way to work when it is raining.
Mileage for week: 19.7+4.9
Day 6--November 15:
Under 1400 calories-- 1367
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for the cornfields that are now bare. I never noticed the corn/soybean farms around here until I started walking/jogging on the roads around my house. I just took them for granted. I watched this corn grow since it was planted in the spring. Now it is gone. And so is another season.
Mileage for week: 24.6+5.8
Day 7--November 16:
Under 1400 calories-- 1398
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for all of the people that help to bring me good food and drink. From the farmer, to the truckdriver, to the cashier, and everyone in between.
Mileage for week: 30.4+5.75=36.15
Day 8--November 17:
Under 1400 calories-- 1388
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful that my family loves me...flaws and all.
Mileage for week: 5.5
Day 9--November 18:
Under 1400 calories-- 1207
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for music. And thankful DH took us to see the Trans Siberian Orchestra last night. If I could tolerate the paparazzi and the lights...I could be in that band. LOL
Mileage for week: 5.5 + 3.6
Day 10--November 19:
Under 1400 calories-- 1331
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for Sparkpeople.com and all of my Spark friends...because you make this journey more fun...and I am all about FUN!
Mileage for week: 9.1 +4.75
Day 11--November 20:
Under 1400 calories-- 1394
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for my brain, heart, and nerve. And I thank the wizard for reminding me that I had them all along...I am just a horse of a different color...
Mileage for week: 13.85 +4.4
Day 12--November 21:
Under 1400 calories-- 1210
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for CHOCOLATE!
Mileage for week: 18.25 +4.4
Day 13--November 22:
Under 1400 calories-- 1361
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful for my home. And I am thankful for the blood, sweat, and tears contained within these logs...oh if these logs could talk.
Mileage for week: 22.65 +5.8
Day 14--November 23:
Under 1400 calories-- 1400
Thankful Status: Today I am thankful that the Thankful Challenge is over...not really...I saved the most important for last...I am thankful for my 2 children and husband...better than having 1 child and 2 husbands. LOL
Mileage for week: 32.75
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