The Green Thing

Friday, August 05, 2011

The Green Thing

Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman, that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren't good for the environment.

The woman apologized and explained, "We didn't have this green thing back in my earlier days."

The clerk responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations."

She was right -- our generation didn't have the green thing in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled. But we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

We walked up stairs, because we didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks. But she was right. We didn't have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby's diapers because we didn't have the throw-away kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts -- wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But that young lady is right; we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house -- not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana . In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity. But she's right; we didn't have the green thing back then.

We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull. But we didn't have the green thing back then.

Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.

But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn't have the green thing back then?

Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a lesson in conservation from a smartass young person.

Remember: Don't make old People mad.

We don't like being old in the first place, so it doesn't take much to piss us off.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANTIGONAKI 8/9/2011 10:37PM

Funny, how my generation, and younger takes these things for granted. I think I am the only person I know that prefers to talk to someone rather than text or e-mail. I STILL don't have a facebook account, and I WALK that 1.2 miles to the super market and store my groceries underneath my stroller (2 days worth) rather than take the car for such a short distance. (I am going to be 34 in Dec, BTW) It's the LITTLE THINGS. The plastic bags... you can use to throw away your recyclable plastics-- and you are STILL GREEN Report Inappropriate Comment

ROBBIE53 8/9/2011 7:06PM

Amen sister! Report Inappropriate Comment

MERRYMARY42 8/5/2011 6:58PM

So very true, every bit of it, and this was life. Thanks for the reminder Report Inappropriate Comment

IDLETYME 8/5/2011 12:06PM

That blog is wonderful and of course at 72 years old I remember all of that and more. We were generous, polite, respectful, healthy, happy and self-sufficient! I'm really glad I was born "in the olden days"! I really enjoyed your blog - thanks! Report Inappropriate Comment

JGILBERTMDY 8/5/2011 10:48AM

I love the parting salvo! May I add that I'm tired of having to apologize every time I don't bring in a plastic bag because I NEED a paper bag for something? Book covers, stenciled wrapping paper and other things that I then don't use plastics and dyes. Report Inappropriate Comment

PAMMY222 8/5/2011 10:45AM

This is fabulous!! For the young woman, as little as 10 years ago we didn't have to be connected to all our acquaintances every minute of the day by cellphones, that are answered or used for texting in lieu of speaking with the person in front of them. How rude! Unfortunately, the older people I know, and respect, don't have internet. This really makes you think! We have the green thing because we've become too over-indulgent. I loved this, it will make me smile all day! Report Inappropriate Comment

CHANGINGSAM 8/5/2011 10:11AM

I'm sorry that happened! Wow! Some people are just rude! Report Inappropriate Comment

DEBBIEOLMOS57 8/5/2011 10:10AM

you are so right Report Inappropriate Comment

Southern Humor

Thursday, August 04, 2011

Alabama

A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for
the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under
the weight of an eight-point buck.
"Where's Henry?" the others asked.
"Henry had a stroke o' some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the
trail," the successful hunter replied.
"You left Henry layin' out there and carried the deer back?" they
inquired.
"A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one's gonna steal
Henry!"


Georgia

The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an
invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.
He called her into his office and said, "Y'all graduated from
the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I wuz to give yew
$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"
The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everthang but my
earrings."


Louisiana

A senior citizen in Louisiana was overheard saying ... "When the end of
the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana .."
When asked why, he replied, "I'd rather be in Louisiana 'cause
everythang
happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the world."


Mississippi

The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to
his
buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking
lot!"
Bubba replied, "Did y'all see who it was?"
The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."


North Carolina

A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the
road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and
one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.
A passerby studied the scene as he drove by, and was so curious he
turned
around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was.
The man replied, "I got a flat tahr."
The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"
The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in
the
front and flares in the back. I never did understand it neither."



Tennessee

A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
asked, "Got any ID?"
The driver replied, "Bout whut?"


Texas

The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of his
pick-up
into the ditch. The Sheriff asked, "Why are you dumping garbage in the
ditch? Don't you see that sign right over your head."
"Yep," he replied. "That's why I'm dumpin' it here, 'cause it says:
'Fine For Dumping Garbage.' "

Y'all kin say whut y'all want 'about the South, but y'all never heard o'
nobody retirin' an' movin' North.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IDLETYME 8/4/2011 3:39PM

Those are hilarious. Thanks for brightening my day! Report Inappropriate Comment

MERRYMARY42 8/4/2011 2:20PM

I saw southern humor, and beings my husband is originally from Tennessee, I had to check it out. yep, Tennessee was included. Enjoyed, Thanks Report Inappropriate Comment

1CRAZYDOG 8/4/2011 2:06PM

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Older Couple

Wednesday, August 03, 2011

An old woman and old man, married many years, were sitting on the patio sipping wine. The old woman said, "I love you so much. I don't know how I survived without you." The old man said, "Is that you talking or the wine talking." The old woman said, "It's me, talking to the wine."

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IDLETYME 8/3/2011 1:27PM

Funny Report Inappropriate Comment

HELEN_BRU 8/3/2011 11:12AM

Good one! Report Inappropriate Comment

SANDRAFIVE 8/3/2011 10:54AM

I liked that. Report Inappropriate Comment

CHANGEISGOOD 8/3/2011 10:09AM

That is FUNNY!!! Thanks for the smile!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

Doctor's Visit

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

After his exam, the doctor asked the elderly man: "You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about ?"

"In fact, I do." said the old man. "After I have sex with my wife, I am
usually cold and chilly, and then, after I have sex with her the second
time, I am usually hot and sweaty."

Later, after examining his elderly wife, the doctor said: "Everything appears to be fine."

"Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me ?"

She replied that she had no questions or concerns. The doctor then said to her: "Your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually cold and chilly after having sex with you the first time, and then hot and sweaty after the second time. Do you know why ?"

"Oh that crazy old fart." she replied. "That's because the first time is usually in January and the second time is in August."

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HELEN_BRU 8/2/2011 4:25PM

Oh, that'll do it!! lol Thanks for the laugh today! Helen Report Inappropriate Comment

THETURTLEBEAR 8/2/2011 2:30PM

HA HA HA! Report Inappropriate Comment

IDLETYME 8/2/2011 12:34PM

Great! Really cute!!! Thanks for sharing! Report Inappropriate Comment

1CRAZYDOG 8/2/2011 11:35AM

Who woulda think it! Report Inappropriate Comment

MERRYMARY42 8/2/2011 11:22AM

Oh Yeah, makes all kinds of sense Report Inappropriate Comment

Italian Grandparents

Monday, August 01, 2011

I T A L I A N G R A N D M O T H E R S

An Italian grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You comma to de front door of the apartmenta. I am inna apartmenta 301 There issa bigga panel at the front door. With you elbow , pusha button 301.

I will buzza you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with you elbow , pusha 3. When you get out, I'mma on the left. With you elbow , hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? ........






"What . . . .. .. You coming empty handed?"









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I T A L I A N G R A N D F A T H E R S







Why Italian Fathers and Grandfathers pass their handguns down through the family.

An old Italian man is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me."

"But grandpa, I really don't like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?"

"You lissina me, boy. Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. "

"Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man. "Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, "times up'?

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROBBIE53 8/1/2011 7:49PM

Thanks for the laugh. A good way to end the day. Report Inappropriate Comment

MERRYMARY42 8/1/2011 6:55PM

As you know, I always get a chuckle from you, Thanks Report Inappropriate Comment

MERRYMARY42 8/1/2011 6:55PM

As you know, I always get a chuckle from you, Thanks Report Inappropriate Comment

JENNYLENNON 8/1/2011 5:45PM

I have italian grandparents.....too funny! Report Inappropriate Comment

HELEN_BRU 8/1/2011 5:22PM

They are both so good, can't stop laughing! Thanks for the chuckles! Helen (hugs) Report Inappropriate Comment

IDLETYME 8/1/2011 12:28PM

Thank you for starting my day with a smile Report Inappropriate Comment

RORYLYONS 8/1/2011 12:11PM

These are hilarious..thanks for the belly laugh early in the morning.. Report Inappropriate Comment