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GERIKRAGH's Recent Blog Entries

Older Couple

Wednesday, August 03, 2011

An old woman and old man, married many years, were sitting on the patio sipping wine. The old woman said, "I love you so much. I don't know how I survived without you." The old man said, "Is that you talking or the wine talking." The old woman said, "It's me, talking to the wine."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IDLETYME 8/3/2011 1:27PM

    Funny emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 8/3/2011 11:12AM

    Good one!

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SANDRAFIVE 8/3/2011 10:54AM

    I liked that. emoticon

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CHANGEISGOOD 8/3/2011 10:09AM

    That is FUNNY!!! Thanks for the smile!!!

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Doctor's Visit

Tuesday, August 02, 2011

After his exam, the doctor asked the elderly man: "You appear to be in good health. Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about ?"

"In fact, I do." said the old man. "After I have sex with my wife, I am
usually cold and chilly, and then, after I have sex with her the second
time, I am usually hot and sweaty."

Later, after examining his elderly wife, the doctor said: "Everything appears to be fine."

"Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me ?"

She replied that she had no questions or concerns. The doctor then said to her: "Your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually cold and chilly after having sex with you the first time, and then hot and sweaty after the second time. Do you know why ?"

"Oh that crazy old fart." she replied. "That's because the first time is usually in January and the second time is in August."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HELEN_BRU 8/2/2011 4:25PM

    Oh, that'll do it!! lol

Thanks for the laugh today!

Helen

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THETURTLEBEAR 8/2/2011 2:30PM

    HA HA HA!

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IDLETYME 8/2/2011 12:34PM

    Great! Really cute!!! Thanks for sharing! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 8/2/2011 11:35AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon Who woulda think it!

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MERRYMARY42 8/2/2011 11:22AM

    Oh Yeah, makes all kinds of sense emoticon

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Italian Grandparents

Monday, August 01, 2011

I T A L I A N G R A N D M O T H E R S

An Italian grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You comma to de front door of the apartmenta. I am inna apartmenta 301 There issa bigga panel at the front door. With you elbow , pusha button 301.

I will buzza you in. Come inside, the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with you elbow , pusha 3. When you get out, I'mma on the left. With you elbow , hit my doorbell." "Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? ........






"What . . . .. .. You coming empty handed?"









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I T A L I A N G R A N D F A T H E R S







Why Italian Fathers and Grandfathers pass their handguns down through the family.

An old Italian man is dying. He calls his grandson to his bedside, Guido, I wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome plated .38 revolver so you will always remember me."

"But grandpa, I really don't like guns. How about you leave me your Rolex watch instead?"

"You lissina me, boy. Somma day you gonna be runna da business, you gonna have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a couple of bambinos. "

"Somma day you gonna come-a home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another man. "Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to you watch and say, "times up'?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROBBIE53 8/1/2011 7:49PM

    Thanks for the laugh. A good way to end the day.

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MERRYMARY42 8/1/2011 6:55PM

    As you know, I always get a chuckle from you, Thanks

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MERRYMARY42 8/1/2011 6:55PM

    As you know, I always get a chuckle from you, Thanks

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JENNYLENNON 8/1/2011 5:45PM

    I have italian grandparents.....too funny!

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HELEN_BRU 8/1/2011 5:22PM

    They are both so good, can't stop laughing!

Thanks for the chuckles!

Helen (hugs)

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IDLETYME 8/1/2011 12:28PM

    Thank you for starting my day with a smile emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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RORYLYONS 8/1/2011 12:11PM

    These are hilarious..thanks for the belly laugh early in the morning.. emoticon emoticon

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Eat Chocolate?

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Eat Chocolate?


A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy 2 servings per night and a few more on weekends, I consume about 3,500 calories of chocolate in a week, which equals one pound of weight per week.

Therefore, in the last 3-1/2 years, I have had chocolate caloric intake of about 180 pounds, and I only weigh 165 pounds.

So... without chocolate, I would have wasted away to nothing about 3 months ago! I owe my life to chocolate!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CORNERKICK 8/3/2011 1:07AM

  Chocolate is the best!

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IDLETYME 8/1/2011 9:58AM

    Hooray for your chocolate - we want you here!!! emoticon emoticon

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THETURTLEBEAR 7/31/2011 11:18PM

    Love the logic!

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ROBBIE53 7/31/2011 7:49PM

    I love chocolate!

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LAURIEANNIE1 7/31/2011 6:57PM

    I too owe my life to chocolate. I do not want to live without it. I will find a way to fit it in.

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TEDYBEAR2838 7/31/2011 6:15PM

    emoticon emoticon

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MAREANNIE 7/31/2011 6:06PM

    emoticon

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RETURNOFSARAH 7/31/2011 4:43PM

    Haha I love this!!

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Another Joke

Saturday, July 30, 2011

> A doctor was addressing a large audience in Oxford...
>
> "The material we put into our stomachs should have killed most of us sitting
> here, years ago. Red meat is full of steroids and dye. Soft drinks corrode
> your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High transfat diets
> can be disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the
> germs in our drinking water. But, there is one thing that is the most
> dangerous of all and most of us have, or will eat it. Can anyone here tell
> me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after
> eating it?"
>
>
>
> After several seconds of quiet, a 70-year-old man in the front row raised
> his hand, and softly said, "Wedding Cake?"
>

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HELEN_BRU 7/31/2011 1:00PM

    Good one!

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RURABE 7/30/2011 11:18PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MERRYMARY42 7/30/2011 8:03PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MJ7DM33 7/30/2011 1:41PM

  emoticon

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BAYSIDE07 7/30/2011 12:21PM

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