GAYLLYNNE   198,301
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How I've changed and grown with SparkPeople

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Back in the day....back when I would "diet" I would find myself going along swimmingly. I'd be losing weight, I'd be happy and then...oh then the dreaded pitfall!!! Something like a holiday, birthday, special party, whatever, would come about and I'd fall. I'd fall and getting back up was nearly impossible. If and/or when I'd get back up it could be weeks, months and sometimes even years later. It was that hard for me.

Last week was Passover. What a difficult holiday to get through for me because not only is it my favorite holiday but it is considered the biggest eating holiday filled with yummy foods. The holiday is at my home as well and I cook for weeks. It was hard to maintain and not cheat, very, very hard.

By mid-week I had given away most of the leftovers. I still hadn't completely tracked all my food but I wasn't terrible. By the end of the week, I was back. Tracking everything I ate, making good choices and now I'm completely back in that proverbial wagon.

I didn't lose anything during Passover but I didn't gain either. This morning I had a two pound loss!! Hooray! I feel so pleased that I am back. No excuses, no giving up and gaining it all back, but just back into eating right, exercising and taking back my life.

I really want to thank my friend Dawn who told me about SparkPeople. It really has changed my life. Reaching goals has made this even more rewarding and now I'm back on track for my next one. 20 pounds by my birthday May 18. I want this one so much!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSCHREF 4/29/2008 9:51AM

    Thanks for your comment on my blog. Reading yours I see that I haven't hit any holidays that I celebrate yet. I can imagine, though, how tough it must be to get through! Some years back I was in a behavior modification class for weight loss and one of the things I remember in the class about eating out, etc was to say "I'm here to be with my friend, spouse, etc. and the friendship is what's important, not the food". I imagine the same thing could be applied to eating at Passover though it doesn't help if you are the one doing the cooking!! Another tactic from the class was to say something like "What an interesting art display" and to think of the food as a colorful exhibit rather than something edible. Sounds like you've got a lot to be proud of. I hope I do as well!

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TBUCKNER 4/28/2008 10:35PM

    I AM SOOOO PROUD OF YOU!!! You have come such a very long way, since the first blog reply I made to you, -been awhile...and Gayllynne you've worked so hard. Your attitude is wonderful. I am so proud to know you...even if only through "the threads"; people like you lift my spirits up, and help me to keep at it! I really admire your strength, and again Gayllynne, I am so proud of you! emoticon -Tammy

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BLINDBETH 4/28/2008 9:18PM

    That is impressive to not gain during Passover. We didn't cook (thus eat) nearly as much this year because Passover came right in the middle of two Proms, a lot of catering, and just a life that has been too busy. No one had time to cook more than the basics.

And I love the word swimmingly.

Have a great week!

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TAZ675 4/28/2008 9:07PM


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DORY.A 4/28/2008 9:03AM

    I totally know what you mean about going along and then hitting an "eating" holiday... I would never get back on the wagon after those... now I do.

I am learning, as are you, what my triggers are for over-eating... or for just giving up too soon.

You are an inspiration and have been a great encouragement on my own journey - thank you for your words on my page... and the new workout shoes!!

I can't wait to celebrate with you on or before your birthday, that you've reached that next goal!

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CANNOTFATHOM 4/27/2008 7:58PM

    You have a fantastic and healthy attitude! Best wishes on your continued success!


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BUNTINGL 4/27/2008 6:38PM

    Thanks for the nice comments on my page. Just read your post. I celebrated Passover at a friend's house so I can completely relate. I'd been off track since Easter! Back on track now though. Good luck with your goals!

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GIRLINMOTION 4/27/2008 12:36PM

    I want to thank your friend Dawn too for telling you about SparkPeople. You have begun re-blossoming as your old/young confident self and a healthier body too.

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TORINBAMA 4/27/2008 11:27AM

    Way to go! The longer we stay on track the easier it's going to get. Don't expect to be perfect or you'll be setting yourself up for failure. Little changes daily will be the way to win this battle. I'm so proud of you! Keep up the good work. I'm trying to lose 20 pounds by Memorial Day and since you are trying to lose that much by your birthday we can do it together! We can do this!


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BONLOR 4/27/2008 10:15AM

    Congrats on your "loss" and on your successful journey through the holiday. It is very difficult to avoid those wonderful foods that get prepared during holiday times, so instead of passing on them we have to learn to just have a very small amount to satisfy that craving (which it sounds like you succeeded in doing!) You are doing great, keep it up!
emoticon emoticon

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Catching a glimpse

Friday, April 25, 2008

I dropped my son off at his baseball practice which is at a place in a mall. This particular mall is going out of business and one of the big department stores is selling off everything. Of course I checked it out.

I decided not to buy any clothes. I am no where near the weight I want to be and I will wait until I am half way before I pick up anything! As I was shopping I walked around a corner to look at some cooking things and looked to my left to see a full length mirror. I stopped for a moment and just looked at myself. When this happened in the past I looked away very quickly but this time I realized I was making progress.

This wasn't someone I didn't know but was me. Yes, I'm still heavy but not like I was. I didn't recoil in horror at what I looked like, I just thought, "Hmmm, getting there, little by little."

For me that was a defining moment. I have been so angry at myself for so long and now I'm starting...just starting to realize I'm doing everything I can to get to where I need to be.

As Martha would say, "It's a good thing."

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MUSTANGCATHY 4/27/2008 12:29AM

Like you I had a health scare only it took me a few months (12) to get it together. I want to be able to look in the mirror and not recoil,not quite there yet but I will be. I feel that if I can get up , it doesn't matter what hurts, IT"S A GOOD DAY!!! We can do this because we are strong and we want to be FIT AND FINE. Have a great weekend.


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GIRLINMOTION 4/26/2008 4:39PM

    "Oh, what a feeling, now you are high in believing that your are getting there". It does help when you see results. Today I went to the bank, and I didn't recoil either when I saw myself in the security camera. So I know exactly how your feeling and nothing can beat that. WOOHOO!!!!

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BLINDBETH 4/25/2008 9:02PM

    And like you pointed out, I am going to do better at appreciating my assets (pun intended) in a more positive light. Body image is something that can make such an impact on each of us. It is about time that we start focusing on the positives.
Have a great weekend!

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BARCINTL 4/25/2008 1:53PM


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TORINBAMA 4/25/2008 1:51PM


It is greaaat to be able to see some progress isn't it? Be very proud of what you are accomplishing! My trainer noticed that I don't look "as swollen" the other day. I'd quit eating salt - cold turkey - which is HUGE for me since I have loved it, craved it, inhaled it all of my life. How awesome it is that things are changing for the better for us and we're actually starting to notice the changes in our looks!


Keep up the good work!


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Those Ex's are good for something!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

My ex took our daughter to look at colleges this past week. They left right after Passover dinner. He has the patience of Job and is a really great guy and wonderful dad. We are very good friends.

They got back today and of course his first question was whether there was any chicken soup left. Naturally, I had a whole container waiting for him. As I was feeding him I asked if he liked this dish or that dish and of course, his answer was yes.

So, all those leftovers that were calling my name in the fridge are going home with him tonight. I couldn't be happier because my children don't eat this stuff and I love it. It now won't go to waste and will be really appreciated and best of all won't end up on my hips!!!

Talk about win/win!!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GIRLINMOTION 4/24/2008 9:37AM

    Win/Win is great.

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BLINDBETH 4/24/2008 6:40AM

    Way to go! I often send meals and leftovers to my Ex, too - especially since he is single (and it is always harder to cook meals when there is just one person eating). I love that you have such a great attitude about your Ex - and that is so much healthier for your children. My Ex is still one of my best friends - and he is great friends with my DH. Also, I am good friends with my DH's Ex-wife. The kids have had no success in trying to play us against each other and they really haven't even tried. We are all just one weird and happy family!

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BARCINTL 4/23/2008 9:36PM

    But the real question is, did he take any of the cheese ball?

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And for todays exercise.....

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

I worked so hard today that by the time I got home I could barely walk. My feet hurt and I just had no energy left. Don't let anyone tell you that dog grooming is easy!

After I rested a few minutes and had a bite to eat my son begged me to go to the store to get him a baseball tee for him to hit off of. I agreed and off we went. After that we went to the baseball field and I made some phone calls while he hit.

After a while I thought "hmmmm, I can do this", so I went out into the field and ran after the balls that were hit into the outfield. To be honest I stink at throwing but I tried and ran all over to get to them.

We had a lot of fun and I know that I got a good work out. Hey, better than nothing isn't it!

Oh and before we left he let me hit a few. Yeah, I stink at that too but it sure was fun!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GIRLINMOTION 4/24/2008 9:15AM

    I know how you are feeling. My son is in his first year of fastball. I try to practice with him when I can. Hitting is one of his need to learn things, and when he does hit, I am chasing the ball too (hard to do after running in a 10k run this past Sunday). I should look into a baseball tee and more balls to help him with his hitting, and my running after balls, lol.

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BLINDBETH 4/22/2008 9:53PM

    I love being able to incorporate exercise into my daily work. But that rarely happens for me.

I know how tired I am when I bathe Mili - so I can't imagine doing it all day!

Hope that tomorrow is a great day, too!

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Wow, that was tough

Sunday, April 20, 2008

So, last night was the first night of Passover. All my favorite foods, all things I made myself, from scratch and I couldn't eat most of it. Believe me, it wasn't easy. Apparently, everyone thought everything I made was delicious and my friend Dawn also brought yummy dishes and I just had a little taste. This was my first big obstacle, so to speak, since starting this new lifestyle. I had to keep telling myself that this doesn't mean I will never have these delicious foods again (I really miss my matzo balls!), it just means that this year it's not meant to be. Next year, when I am slim and fit, I will have a little of all the things I love and not worry that they will ruin what I have begun.

Tonight I am having Dawn (Barcintl) and her husband over for dinner. I want to use up as much as possible so I'm not tempted. My children eat very little of these wonderful foods so it's best to get rid of them now. Good thing my boyfriend loves to eat!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARCINTL 4/20/2008 5:41PM

    At least I brought healthy things like Quinoa Salad and Roasted Cauliflower! The only bad thing I brought was the Cheese Ball and yeah, you did look like you had had a religious experience when you tasted a smidgen of it.

It was a wonderful night and I was up to 148.8 this morning (I had gone down to 149.6 yesterday by 10am)

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