GAYLLYNNE   203,883
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That dirty "O" word

Friday, May 23, 2008

Obese. Yes, that dirty word (what did you think?). I had never thought about that word until I came to spark people. When I joined and programmed in my height and weight etc., my body came out to be obese. I was shocked. Me? How could someone who was used to nicknames such as "little one" and "little Gayl" be obese. But, there it was in black and white. How did I get there??

Yes, hysterectomy, divorce, lumpectomy they all contributed. It's been a tough few years for sure, but obese? I can remember, just before starting S/P, walking into a store that had a sign which read: "Plus size 12 and up, this side". I'm a plus size??? How did that happen. I ran from that store.

Now, I have hit the half way point. I am no longer obese. Overweight, yes, but obese, no. I never, ever will be again. It really brought me to my knees and made me look at who and what I have become. Since I didn't like what I saw, I changed it.

Easy?? Heck no!! But necessary in order to be the best me I can be. I will be a better mom, better friend and better person if I can be happier about who/what I am.

So, this morning I walked the lake. It was a beautiful day and I finally was able to walk those three miles in 45 mins. I even added some time by walking to and from the lake instead of driving.

I'm changing. Not only on the outside but inside too. I want to go backwards as I move forward. Backwards to the person I used to be. Happy, confident and not horrified to look in the mirror. Forward to the new me that my friends and family can be proud of.

I'm here, I'm working hard, I'm staying.

Happy Memorial Day Weekend to all my SparkPeople friends!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARCINTL 5/24/2008 7:38PM

    Going backwards is a good thing. I just went back 20 years, both weight-wise and career-wise. Not an easy thing and it takes some guts to give up the last two decades (of eating mindlessly, etc), but it's worth moving forward. You're worth it and you'll get to the place of what you need.

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TAMMI1963 5/24/2008 4:05PM

    Your's is a truly inspiring blog entry. Keep up the good work.

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NAOMIJGH 5/23/2008 2:42PM

    While a wise friend said that the number on the size tag doesn't matter, labels of all sorts do make an impression on us. Like you, I got to a point where I just didn't like what I was seeing any more and decided I had to make a change. A little push from the orthopedist about the damage carrying extra weight will do to my arthritic hip didn't hurt, either.

Rockland Lake is a bit out of the way for me, but you never know...

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CELESTE5104 5/23/2008 1:52PM

    Good for you Gayl:) You are on the right track to being a healthier you. You are doing a great job! I look forward to seeing you progress along too. Best of luck and have a great weekend.

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TANSHAN1 5/23/2008 12:28PM

    Girlfriend I feel your about "MORBIDLY OBESE" at 14??

I was, had my stomach stapled..never learned to eat right or about nutrition and am back up too the same spot 27 years later...

But this time is for real and the right way and for ME!!
WE can do this!

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WINNA01 5/23/2008 12:08PM

    Yea! Reading your entry was inspiring! Congrats on your progress and good luck!

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Walking in the rain

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

I was lucky enough to get out of work a little early today. I decided that I would walk around the lake before I got home because I had this extra time. As I got near my home it started to rain. Drat! As I got closer to the lake (5 mins from my house) it cleared up and I decided to go for it. Being smart, I pulled my umbrella out before I started.

I had gone about 1/2 mile and it started to drizzle. For a moment I thought about turning back but decided to stick it out. It poured all day yesterday and I did no exercise at all. So, I walked.

It rained some, it stopped a little then it rained some more. I hated it even more than usual as I was cold and WET! But....I did it. No excuses, no fan fare, just getting it done.

I really want to be under 140 by July 4th. It's my new goal and in order to make it I have to do everything right. This includes eating right, exercising and drinking the water.

Hopefully, tomorrow I will be able to get out early, walk the lake and then forget about it for the rest of the day. As usual, I take everything in stride!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLINDBETH 5/22/2008 6:10AM

    Yay! Way to go! That is some real dedication to stick it out in COLD rain. I'm impressed! emoticon

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Pleasant surprises

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Tomorrow is my birthday. Today is my boyfriend's birthday. Tonight is the big party!!! Woohoo, I'm so excited I can't stand it. It will be the first time I'm meeting some of his friends and it will be the first time some of my friends are meeting him. It's going to be great!!! My dear friend Dawn is having the party at her house. Isn't that a fantastic gift??? I'm so blessed to have her in my life!

As you all know, I was trying to lose 20 lbs by my birthday, which I did last week. It has been a tough week since. Mother's Day was not easy and I know I went over my calorie limit but it was worth every bite. I didn't go over again all week but exercise was rare. I was just so busy and those walks around the lake were stymied because of so much rain.

I decided to weigh in this morning instead of tomorrow morning after the party. I'm smart like that *grin*. Much to my surprise I lost ANOTHER POUND!!! Wow!!! 21 lbs. Too bad I'm not turning 21 hahahahaha, but I am really pleased. 30 lbs by the end of July is doable now, but I'm not going to get nuts if I don't make it. I'm just going to stay strong.

Happy Birthday Mike!!!! (he's not here but I just felt like saying that)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSCHREF 5/19/2008 4:19PM

    Happy birthday to you both! Isn't it nice to see that July goal as possible? emoticon

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KATIE233 5/19/2008 2:06PM

    hi thanks for stopping bye my spark page. come again. what a nice birthday present losing 21lbs great job! keep going. have a great week.

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TAMMI1963 5/17/2008 12:33PM

    Happy Birthday to both of you. Congrats on the 21 lb weight loss. You should easily hit your goal by July. Have a great time at the party tonight. emoticon

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CELESTE5104 5/17/2008 10:14AM

    Happy Birthday to you both:) You should be very proud of yourself for losing your 20lbs plus one!!!!! Being consistent is a great thing. So this week wasn't the best, that's okay. Just make next week count. Have a good time tonight too:)

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BARCINTL 5/17/2008 9:45AM

    Yay for persistence! And happy birthday to you too, Gayl :)

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My pink sweater and other thoughts

Monday, May 12, 2008

Over this past winter I saw this pretty pink sweater. I love things in the pink family from bright pink to purple and baby pinks to lavenders. This was such a pretty color I thought I'd get it to wear over the holidays paired with some black slacks. I bought a size....sigh....large. I brought it home but got very busy before I could try it on.

One evening I was going out to dinner with friends. I spotted the sweater (vee neck, long sleeve, light weight) and thought it would be the perfect thing. I put it on and looked in the mirror and was horrified. I looked like a sausage. My arms bulged, I could see fat around my mid-section and it was tight over the chest. I nearly cried. I pulled it off and put on something loose that hid "me".

Yesterday, Mother's day, my ex (the good one, I have two) called the children and told them he was driving up and taking us all out for Mother's day. I was told to dress-up. Wow! I found some pretty, black pants that I haven't worn in a while that fit great but what to wear on top? hmmmm LOL - bet you are wondering hehehe. Out came that pretty, pink sweater. Did it fit? No, not really because it just hung on me. It was huge. I kind of hiked up the bottom, pushed up the sleeves and it was pretty albeit blousey. My teenage daughter (the fashionesta) told me it was a little big but looked nice and made me look really thin!! That was the best part of Mother's Day!!

As for the restaurant. We went to one of the two 5 star restaurants in the area. I love this place and haven't eaten there in a very long time. YUM!! That was the difficult part. I had the scallops for an appetizer and the duck for an entrée. I love duck but it was so rich I only ate about the size of a golf ball. They had dessert too and I had something I've never seen before which was orange nougat. It was yummy but I didn't even come close to finishing it. It was more food than I've eaten in months!!!

Today I am back on track. As a matter of fact I woke up and was still full. I have no desire to eat yet and am going to save breakfast for later. That's probably a no-no but I just sooooo not hungry!!

I hope this doesn't affect my weigh loss this week but if it does, that's ok because I had the most wonderful time and I looked great and it was all worth it. If I gained a pound then I will just have to lose it again and a few more of its friends!!!

Hope everyones Mother's day was a nice as mine. Oh, and my children brought me flowers too!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLINDBETH 5/15/2008 6:15AM

    Don't you just love when tight clothes become big clothes?! I have a several pants that are very loose around my waist and sag in my rear now... but until I can get some replacements, I'm still wearing them.

Maybe you can dry the sweater a little to shrink it... Now, if it would only be that easy for use to get smaller.

Have a great day!

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DORY.A 5/14/2008 8:54AM

    Woohoo Gayle!! You are doing soooooooo well! Congrats on achieving your 20 lb loss goal EARLY!! You rock!

It sounds like you had a wonderful Mothers Day! You deserve it!

Have a great week!

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FOODFROMAFAR 5/13/2008 12:46AM

    I love your pink sweater story!

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I DON'T BELIEVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Yesterday was a long but mostly fun day. In the morning, I had breakfast as usual. Then, I took my son and a friends daughter and her friend to a huge garage sale. It's more like a flea market with 100's of vendors. I knew I wasn't really going to have time to exercise but I figured walking this place was doing at least a couple of miles. I didn't find anything great either (I wanted a baseball bat for my son but there wasn't any). We had fun and got home about 4:30ish. I had to get my son to the ballpark by 5:15 so it was a scramble to get him fed and dressed and over there. I quickly came home and made a fruit salad with yogurt for me and took it to the game. I was starving and hadn't had anything since breakfast.

I ate at the game while jumping up and down, rooting for his team. I will not get into the game(s) because they were heart breaking. The other team's coach cheated. He put in a child that wasn't in the line up and when he got caught the child should have been considered an out. It would have ended the game but the umpire shrugged and let the child that was supposed to be there play. It was just awful and they ended up losing a game they had clearly won. This was a double header with the same team and it ended at 10 pm. BTW, the first game was played under official protest.

By the time I got home I was too tired to eat anything. I made my son an omelette and put him to bed.

This morning is weigh in. Did I lose the pound I had hoped to lose. Nope.....I LOST TWO POUNDS!!! I am now down 20 lbs. I wanted to be down 20 by my birthday next week and I'm a week early!! I made it to my second goal!! What a great Mother's Day gift to myself.

Happy Mothers Day to all the wonderful mothers on this site. May it be a great day for you all!!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLINDBETH 5/12/2008 5:47AM

    Yay! That is how we like it!

Now don't forget to reward yourself. Soon, you are going to need to buy some new clothes to fit your skinny self!

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MYHAT50 5/12/2008 12:00AM

    Happy Mother's Day to you!!! Way to go!!! It is always a great treat when you reach a goal! I am happy for you!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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FOODFROMAFAR 5/11/2008 11:14PM

    emoticon emoticon

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NEWBUTTERFLY76 5/11/2008 8:22PM


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TAMMI1963 5/11/2008 8:07PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

I am really happy for you!!

Great job.

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