First blog of 2013

Wednesday, January 09, 2013

In my last blog, I told all of you what I had been going through during the last 6 or 7 months of 2012. I had even written a poem about it all (and I am not a poet in any sense of the word)!
At this time I would like to thank all of you who took the time to read, consider and answer it. It is times like these that you find out where your support comes from. Now it is time to move forward until the next trigger hits because it will come sooner or later. I am now better able to deal with it.

I am making no grand promises to myself this year, I will do the very best I can without beating myself up if I do not measure up to some artificial standard. I am in therapy where I am learning not to set lofty goals but realistic ones. As some are aware, I have health issues which, at times, prevent me from doing any form of exercise and sometimes even from driving. I am aware that my driving days are numbered while hoping they do last at least until my DH retires.

I am learning that I am not my mother or my MIL even though I loved them both very much. Family dynamics are funny things but all of us have to deal with them.


I would like to wish all of my SparkFriends a very healthy and happy New Year and hopefully we will all meet our goals, whatever they are.

Nora

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A long absense and a (not very good) poem

Sunday, December 09, 2012

My friends, I have been absent since Sept. 9. It has been a very rough few months and I hope the poem below will explain things.

Here I am, alone in the dumps
Listening to voices, taking my lumps
Inner voices cry "It's not fair"
Outside voices that don't seem to care
I feel adrift, don't know where to turn
Don't seem to have extra energy to burn
I am tired, so tired of constantly fighting
My body, my mind. They both seem so daunting.
The barriers, the walls I've lived with for years
Thousands of time I've given into the tears
I'm afraid, so afraid of what waits beyond
I'm afraid I won't like the person I've found
Oh God, please help me, please give me a guide
I've started this journey, there's no place to hide.
There's no going back, no turning around
I must keep on going, I must stand my ground!
I will find my answers, I will stand up tall
I will keep on going, I'll give it my all!

This poem tries to express my feelings about my life growing up with my family. My mother was a wonerful person in some ways and a dragon in others. One the second anniversary of her death, all this came out. I am still dealing with a lot of it but feel more capable of handling things. In case you are wondering, I did not even have the desire to log onto SP during this time, I just wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep.

Thank you for taking the time to read this blog which is so very long.

Nora

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A great Saturday night

Sunday, September 09, 2012

Last night DH and I and our best friends went out for a great meal and a musical - Jersey Boys. What a great show! It took us back in time to a more innocent time and great music. I have always liked the Four Seasons but did not know the story behind their formation and their successes and failures. If you get a chance, go see it, I know I would go again.

The last six days have been jam packed with activities. Long walk on Monday, housework Tuesday, out with my sister on Wednesday for a great afternoon, Thursday out with DD and GS's on the beach and Friday a Mani/Pedi with best friend. Not a lot of time spent here but did manage to at least sign on most days.

Hope all is well with my SparkFriends and that they all had a wonderful week as well. Until next time.

Nora

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Update on just about everything

Monday, September 03, 2012

Since my last blog everything in our lives has turned around for the better. Knowing that our physical health issues have now been put to the very back of our minds, we can move forward. Personally, I have been walking everyday for the last 5 days. I am going for another walk after this posting.

I never fail to be surprised at the outlook on life once the negative is taken over by the positive. I find I have more energy and the odd thing that may not be as positive as I would like, I find I can ignore or fix it quickly.

Once again I would like to thank and praise all my Sparkfriends who have offered their wise words, support and love over the past year. I am blessed to have found this website and even more blessed with the friends I have found.

Nora

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Good News Day

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Wow, what a good news day for our family. First of all, DH does NOT have to have further colon surgery. He goes back in three years for a follow up and that is it. Second, our son in law Mark does NOT have a recurrance of his bone or pancreatic cancer. He still has something wrong with his leg but it is not cancer. Third, I am still pain free, close to three weeks now. I have walked and done a lot of housework, trying to get the house in tip top condition after all the things I could not do. I am pacing myself, as my doctor has advised so am not trying to everything at once.

Tomorrow, our eldest DD , her son and I are going back to school shopping for him, having lunch and just hanging out.

I have been trying some recipes from my Canadian Diabetes Cookbook lately and we have enjoyed them, some more than others.

Well, time to sign off as I have clothes to put away and Masterchef is on. Talk to you all soon.

Nora

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