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feeling blue

Wednesday, August 08, 2012

Trying not to let things get to me. But maybe if I write them down, I'll release them and feel better.

-There's a big Harry Potter conference happening in Chicago this weekend. Also a big [separate] wizard rock concert. If you don't know, I'm really into Harry Potter and wizard rock specifically. I used to be heavily involved in the wrock scene [was even in a wrock band] before I moved. And my closest friends in Chicago were the ones that I knew through the local HP meetup group. And through wizard rock, I've made friends all over the country, friends I normally don't get to see except at these big events. And they're all converging in Chicago, where I used to live. And... I'm not there. I've had to miss every HP event [big and small] for the last year because I haven't had the money to travel and despite this area being the birthplace of wizard rock, the scene is absolutely dead here. I miss my friends, and I miss Chicago, and I miss the whole community. And everyone's excited, my twitter feed is just constant talk about LeakyCon, and it just makes me more sad. Like, legit about to cry right now.

-I applied to go back to school [for a second Bachelor's degree] for the fall. I sent in the application at the end of May and had my transcripts sent over. They received my transcripts from the school I graduated from, but never got them from the school I transferred from. And I didn't find this out until a week AFTER the deadline for all the transcripts to get in. So I called them and asked if I had them rushed over, that would be okay and they said yes. That was about a month ago, and I still haven't heard if I've gotten in, or my application's been pushed back to winter term, or what. Classes start in less than a month. If I have gotten in, I need to get my financial aid together. If I haven't, I have to figure out what I'm doing for the next four months. I just want to know.

-It was just announced that one of my favourite bands of my entire life is going on tour, but the closest they're coming to here is New York, in December. And I can't afford to go to New York, or to buy tickets. This is pretty much a once in a lifetime opportunity because one of the members NEVER tours with them anymore [I've seen them 4 times and he's never been with them] and I'm most likely going to miss it. On a related note, another of my absolutely favourite musicians is touring and coming to Boston, but it's the weekend of my brother's wedding so I can't go. He NEVER tours here [I need to stop liking British musicians so much] and I just want to see him live ONCE.

-No word regarding my aunt. Last I heard, she was supposed to go in for a biopsy last week. Who knows if she actually did.

-My soon-to-be sister-in-law's bridal shower is on Saturday. While I AM happy about this, and their upcoming wedding, it's also been a cause of stress and disappointment. I'm not a bridesmaid [never have been and probably never will be, honestly] but her bridesmaids have done nothing and I'm doing a TON of work for this, along with my mom and hers. I have about seven billion things to do before the shower on Saturday and it's stressing me out, and I'm not even getting any credit for it.

Bah. I need to go for a run and get some endorphins.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KELLY122581 8/13/2012 5:24AM

    True about the masters, SKAHONEY4U - but one problem with grad school is that there is rarely good financial aid available unless you are applying for a PhD program with a grant.

Who is this mysterious favorite British band you are speaking of??

Sorry that all of these things are converging at once! This was a few days ago - so I hope you are feeling better now!!!

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SKAHONEY4U 8/8/2012 11:28AM

    Why are you going for another bachelors? You can get masters in subjects non-related to your original bachelors! I miss Chicago too.

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TRIXYMAHOGANY 8/8/2012 11:27AM

    That stinks you can't go see your friends at the HP event. :( I really know how that feels!

Sounds like you've got a lot on your plate right now. If you can make the time, you should do something fun and relaxing just for YOU and not worry about anything else, even if it's only for twenty minutes!

Also, I don't know if this is relevant, but if you live in Boston and are trying to get to NYC for that concert (I'm assuming this is the case, feel free to correct me) there's a super cheap bus that runs from Chinatown Boston to Chinatown NYC. It should be less than $15, I think. I haven't taken it in a while but I know it still runs.

Anyway, I hope your week gets better!

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The A-Z of Me!

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

Bored and saw this on a friend's blog so I figured I'd post it instead of mindless munching.

Age: 28. I feel like I should have my life more together at this age than I currently do but… oh well, I'm taking the scenic route!

Bed Size: Full. Big enough for me, the cats, and any dogs I may be watching.

Chore you hate: Doing laundry. This wouldn't be such an issue if I had an electric washing machine like most people, but I hand wash everything. So I tend to put it off as long as possible.

Dogs: Yes! Even though I am most definitely a cat person, I love dogs too. I just have no room [money] for a permanent dog in my life at the moment. So I "borrow" other people's dogs while they're away on vacation.

Essential start of your day: Slowly waking up via surfing the net for at least an hour before getting out of bed.

Favorite Color: Bright pinks.

Gold or Silver: Silver

Height: 5'6"

Instruments I play: Guitar, bass guitar, clarinet, and flute. Or at least, I used to play flute and clarinet before my roommates stole my flute and then I lost my clarinet in the move from Chicago to Rhode Island. Oops.

Job Title: Slacker.

Kids: Cats. Avocado, Ginny, Serenity, Ender, and Felix Felicis.

Live: Rhode Island.

Mom's name: Phyllis.

Nickname: I HATE nicknames [for me]. The only one I like is "Dorky" [from my most-used screenname, DorkyVegan]. Other than that, please don't shorten my name. "Fuchs" is beyond stupid. Seriously. [People actually try to call me this. WHY?]

Pet Peeve: Aside from unasked-for nicknames? People who yell at me to get off the road/onto the sidewalk when I'm riding my bike. No, idiots, that's actually ILLEGAL and HARMFUL TO MY BIKE AND PEDESTRIANS.

Quote: "Did you know that we're all made from stardust? Our atoms were forged in the stars. Not the stars you see now. The older ones, the ones that went nova and turned into dust. Think about it. Our bodies are made from remnants of the ancient suns. And together... we'll make new stars." [from "Sliders"]

Right or left handed: Both.

Siblings: Older sister, younger brother.

Time you wake up: Usually between 8 and 9am [my alarm's set for 9].

Unusual traits: I have no cartilage in my nose.

Vegetables you dislike: Kale and carrots. I used to CONSTANTLY try to eat kale, since it's so good for you, but I could never get more than one mouthful down [and sometimes not even that]. Carrots are okay if they're hidden in curry.

What makes you run late: Panic attacks. Other than that, nothing. I hate being late and am usually absurdly early for everything.

X-rays you've had done: Um. Pretty much every part of my body? Well, I don't think I've gotten my chest x-rayed. But my ankles [SO many times], feet, knees, back, neck, skull, and teeth. I was a VERY klutzy child.

Yummy food you make: Blueberry buckle. Currently obsessed.

Zoo animal: You know, I was going through reeeeally old livejournal entries the other day and I found an entry where I wrote about camels being the best animal in the zoo. I have NO idea why. I've never had a fascination with camels. Except for this one day, I suppose. It was just so random. Anyway… I haven't been to a zoo in years so it might as well be camels.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOGSTARDADDY 8/10/2012 11:54AM

    Thanks for sharing! Camels are cool... but I'll pass on anything blueberry.

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The Love List

Monday, August 06, 2012

I have this running commentary in my head of things I love now that I've lost 37 pounds and vastly improved my fitness. I'm going to write down all that I can think of right now.

I love:
1. No more back pain!
2. I can *literally* jump out of bed in the morning [I did today!]
3. Better sleep, and having enough energy throughout the day
4. Being able to put more and more miles on my bike every month
5. Carrying 20 pounds of groceries home doesn't make my arms feel like they're about to fall off. It also doesn't slow down my pace anymore!
6. My legs. I really, really, REALLY love my legs. Have you gotten that memo yet?
7. I've rediscovered my love of whole foods and cooking
8. Being able to do any workout I want [not always wonderfully, but still a decent effort]
9. Going through my "cannot wear" closet and getting to move a few more items to my "can wear" closet every few weeks
10. Looking at myself in the mirror and enjoying what I see
11. Walking around my house in short shorts and/or a sports bra and not feeling embarrassed [which was ridiculous because I live by myself!]
12. Running!
13. Inspiring my friends to be healthier [one of my friends is starting C25K today!]
14. Being happier in general [yay endorphins!]
15. Never being obese ever again
16. Getting to put a new charm on my bracelet every few weeks
17. Better posture
18. That feeling of working hard for something and achieving it
19. Having a large selection of dresses to wear to my brother's wedding in September, whereas a few months ago I had NONE
20. So much self-confidence!
21. Rekindling my friendships with my runner friends and starting new friendships with other fitness-minded people
22. Having an excuse to get out of my house every day to go to the gym or for a bike ride
23. Exercising instead of wallowing in my anxiety and depression
24. Being able to move fast enough to catch Felix [my half-feral cat] within a minute instead of a 20 minute chase that leaves both of us tired [and her scared]
25. Going further in yoga poses and doing sequences that used to be too difficult
26. Feeling like I could possibly beat my spin-maniac mother in a bike race [even if her bike *is* better than mine and has clipped pedals]
27. Just feeling so much better overall. I LOVE everything I can do now!
28. Being strong, healthy, and happy.

So, those are 28 things. What's on your list?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BILL60 8/7/2012 8:29AM

    Way to stay focused.

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GINNJEN1974 8/6/2012 4:45PM

    What a great idea for a blog. In time I will have to remember to do this too. Good on you the lose of 37lbs and you are definately an exercising machine.

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AMESTARDIS 8/6/2012 2:07PM

    Your list is great. I enjoyed #11.

I don't have a love list yet- but I am going to start with- I love myself---- so I am going to take good care of me. Thanks for sharing.

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SKAHONEY4U 8/6/2012 1:51PM

    I love this blog! You are so positive and lovely!

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Saturday blogkeeping

Saturday, August 04, 2012

Just a few things to note:

1) I added a new blog post at my off-site blog. You can view it here: fuchsiagetsfit.blogspot.com/2012/08/
It contains horrible, horrible "before" photos [for the sake of full disclosure, they were taken in March so not technically *before* but definitely at the *beginning*] and wonderful "current" pictures [taken just this morning!]. I love how I look already, and can't wait to see what I look like when I'm at my goal weight. I'm totally going to be one of those runners out in a sports bra and short shorts once I get there! Hahahaha.

2) I made some AMAZINGLY DELICIOUS Pad Thai for dinner tonight. It's not super low calorie [352 calories], but also not too bad [considering take-out Pad Thai is over 900 calories!]. When I was in Chicago, I lived just around the corner from an amazing Thai restaurant that had the best Pad Thai I've ever tasted. A significant amount of my weight gain was because I had it at least once a week [sometimes twice or even more!]. Anyway, this Pad Thai was just as good [or maybe I just think so because it's been over a year since I had it!] and is waaaay less calories. I put the recipe up here: recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detai


3) My fitness tracker has been public for a while, but I finally made my food tracker public as well. If you're at all interested in what a vegan eats, or something... I don't know. Some days my food is pretty boring [I can honestly eat the same thing for every meal three days in a row], or somewhat questionable in nutrients [like the end of the month when I'm out of money!] but I *try* to be fairly balanced.

4) Weigh in tomorrow! The scale dropped a bunch today but I'm pretty sure that was a fluke. I fully expect my weight tomorrow to be no different than last week's weight. That's my pattern.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLAMENM 8/4/2012 10:32PM

    Those photos show you progress. Keep it up!

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August goals!

Thursday, August 02, 2012

Okay, I've thought them over and I just want to continue on what I did last month. Since I'm still working on 5K training, I don't want to add in something horribly new and mess that up just yet. So, here we go.

August goals:
-lose 6 pounds [I want to fit into a specific dress by my brother's wedding in September... well, I fit into it but my stomach looks pregnant!]
-bike 300 miles [I *may* increase this to 350 since I almost neared it this past month when I was only aiming for 200. I'll reevaluate mid-month]
-accumulate 2500 fitness minutes
-continue 5K training, including transitioning to outdoor running
-sign up for one or possibly two 5Ks in September! [As long as my ankle holds up to outdoor running, I'm going to definitely do a 5k on September 1st. There's another 5K in the area on the 16th but it's HUGE and INTENSE so I might hold off on that one.]
-continue yoga 2x/week, possibly 3x/week which I should really be doing
-strength training 2x/week [focus on legs/core since I focused on arms in July]

In other news, I FINALLY found a running club in the area that sounds amazing! It's organized by a local running store, and they also have training workshops, yoga for runners, etc. The running club's not free [it's $30/year] but still a pretty good deal for all that they offer. In addition to all those workshops and classes, they have two runs a week [Wednesday evenings and Saturday mornings]. It's in Providence so while it's not the MOST convenient thing for me, it's also not terribly inconvenient. The biggest running club here is based in Providence but actually has their weekly runs all over the state, which I can't attend with my lack of a car. This club, however, stays in Providence and that's perfect for me. So, yeah. I have a couple jobs coming up in September and will most likely be putting aside some of those earnings to join the club [if I mesh well with them after a trial run, of course].

I'm really excited about this because running clubs are the BEST for pushing myself harder and faster [presumably, I will be ready for the challenge after a couple 5Ks]. I've been looking for a good running club since April [way back when I thought my ankle would be healed by May!] and this might just be the one. And I only found out about them because they're sponsors of the 5K on September 1st [along with my gym]!

Week 3, day 3 of 5K training tomorrow! SO EXCITED! Oh god, I'm already becoming one of those annoying runners, aren't I? emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BILL60 8/3/2012 8:57AM

    You're not at all annoying. Hang in there and "Do It".

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KELLY122581 8/3/2012 3:52AM

    congrats on W3D3! we can be annoying runners together :-) I'm doing W10D2 on sunday.... what??? I never in my wildest dreams thought I would be a runner!

WOW! 2500 fitness minutes is a tall order! That ought to have you meeting your goals in no time!!!

emoticon You can do it!!

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JANTWO 8/3/2012 12:45AM

    You have great goals!!!! You can do it!!!! emoticon

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