Thin people know this

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

"Hunger comes and goes.

Thin people know this,

and they don't worry about

being hungry."

-- Dr. Judith Beck

Last summer I read those statements in a magazine article. It sounded radical to me. But I was intrigued enough to write it in my planner.

Later I made a calligraphy card with the quote and stuck it on the wall in my kitchen. It did not match my own experience, of course, but I was captivated by it nonetheless.

As the days passed I kept reading those sentences and thinking about whether they could be true. First of all, I had long recognized that our adult sons did not worry about hunger (and yes, amazingly-- by the mercy of God-- they are thin). I myself have always been careful to make arrangements for keeping hunger far away . . . and I honestly thought this was normal.

As the months have passed, I have sheepishly realized that Dr. Beck is right. I have watched many people who are simply not concerned about getting hungry. In fact I have been astonished that so many people spend a lot of time not thinking about food at all!

With tiny steps I am inching towards joining them.

I did the skipping-lunch experiment conscientiously for the Beck Diet Solution assignment, and I was astonished that it went okay.

I have continued to practice waiting to eat until scheduled food. It is pretty tough, but it is usually possible.

The clock is my friend. When I'm getting concerned that I'll be too hungry to stick to my plan, I note what time it is and resolve to wait half an hour. So I won't be agitating during that 30 minutes, I start doing something interesting (like reading you guys' blogs--but no recipes!) .

What usually happens is that I get involved in a distraction and I forget to look at the clock. I still feel so surprised when the hunger goes away (usually). By the time I check, it's time to eat (or nearly so---and I can make it).

I definitely still have my weak times. I haven't completely stopped worrying about hunger. But this time next year, I will know. I will know. Hunger comes and goes.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEWINGMEG 2/18/2010 9:46AM

Good quote... thanks! I think I will put it up somewhere too!! Report Inappropriate Comment

AMBULATOR 2/18/2010 7:37AM

Great post. I like that quote. Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCY- 2/18/2010 6:41AM

You are doing wonderfully. Scheduled food does help. Report Inappropriate Comment

GSCOTTC 2/17/2010 11:45PM

I do believe that I am going to steal this. Thanks for posting it. Scott Report Inappropriate Comment

LOSINGAMBER 2/17/2010 11:43PM

Interesting thoughts! I'll have to ponder on this myself since it reminds me of my husband and he is the same way. Report Inappropriate Comment

Quote Digest

Monday, February 15, 2010

“Discipline is remembering what you want.”
--John Campbell, from Flutterby)L( 2/10

Self-respect is the root of discipline: The sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself.
--Abraham Joshua Heschel, from WarmSpringDay's page

Reminder.....Wanting to eat is not a crisis, just a bad habit. I must train myself to acknowledge what I am really feeling and act appropriately to satisfy the real need. --from Morered blog 2/10

I was so hungry last night that I finally put a halt to the eating by going to bed at 9:00 PM. I was actually able to go to sleep. from Goddess_of_Go blog 2/13

I enjoyed the [Valentine's Day] meal without guilt and am not concerned, because I really didn't have that big a surplus for the day, and I made a plan for what to do at Five Guys Burgers & Fries next time that will cut my calorie consumption in half. --Goddess_of_Go blog 2/14

I am not where I need to be, but thank God I am not where I used to be.
-- Joyce Myers from WARMSPRINGDAY's page

There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.
-- Beverly Sills, operatic coloratura soprano, General Manager of the New York City Opera, Chairman of Lincoln Center from WARMSPRINGDAY's page

I have been doing AWESOME on my changes. I have NOT been seeing the results that I wanted, but I will not give up, and I HAVE been losing, so that is great. --from BestLife79 2/13

what i did right: planned a crab fest for [my birthday] dinner. fresh crab is yummy and low cal and you can't gobble it up fast. ditto for artichokes. the polenta dish i made was cheesy and yummy, but i waited until i had had crab and choke and salad to just have a small serving. --from Wendall125 2/12

Hello, who is this girl? She can't wait to get home and workout! She pre-thinks her schedule for the week to ensure she can fit it in at least 5 days a week. She looks forward to the challenge and the high afterwards! --from GlamourGirl-9

You guys are awesome! These are just a very few of the DOZENS of inspiring and practical words I find among my Spark colleagues every day.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRAVELGRRL 2/15/2010 8:22PM

Every day I think, "How can she top this?" But you always do! You've let us know how profound we are right here! Thanks for your blogs! TG Report Inappropriate Comment

ID_VANDAL 2/15/2010 3:35PM

Those are greaat quotes and what a resource this site is especially with people like you doing the blogging!! Keep it up I always want to read what you have to say. Vandal Report Inappropriate Comment

TEACHINKIDS2 2/15/2010 3:00PM

I love these! Bless you for sharing! btw..YOU are Report Inappropriate Comment

ANNANN63 2/15/2010 2:20PM

What a lovely post. We truly have an inspiring group of people here. And you are one of them. Report Inappropriate Comment

AZURE14 2/15/2010 11:41AM

Thanks for sharing these wonderful quotes! Report Inappropriate Comment

Pooling Ideas

Sunday, February 14, 2010

At a luncheon today, we started talking about diets. Here are a few ideas people at my table said worked for them:

Always leave a few bites on your plate.

Whatever part of your meal you love most, eat that first. That makes it easier to stop as soon as you are full.

Develop a sense of when you feel satisfied, as distinguished from the pressure of being stuffed full.

At a restaurant, get a take-out box as soon as your meal is served. Divide all your portions in half and save it to enjoy at a later meal.

Put taco ingredients on a plate with extra lettuce. Sprinkle tortilla chips on top, to get the flavor without so much fat & carbs.

Eat some protein with every carb, whether meal or snack, for lasting satiety and slow blood sugar release.

Drink a big glass of water as soon as you get up.

Cut a treat in tiny pieces before you start to help you remember to savor every bite.

Use a baby fork to slow down the pace of eating so you can enjoy it more and let more time pass so you have a chance to feel full.

Munch frozen blueberries for a healthy sweet treat.

Sprinkle a bit of toasted granola and nuts on top of plain oatmeal.

I love getting additional specific ideas!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRAVELGRRL 2/15/2010 8:21PM

Great ideas. I don't think we can EVER get enough reminders of what we SHOULD do. I guess I'm starting to realize that I've been eating "wrong" for so long it's going to take a long time to retrain myself. I still can't leave food on my plate -- you know about those starving children in China, right????? ;-) Report Inappropriate Comment

ID_VANDAL 2/15/2010 11:09AM

Good tips Freelady. I always (now anyway) make sure to put my fork down between bites. I also try to never eat finger food anymore. When I do eat something I can pick up with my fingers, I always use my silverware to cut it up and eat it with a fork or spoon anyway. For example, something like a hotdog (not that I have them anymore) or hamburger. If it's a hamburger I always make sure they don't put the bun on it. If it's cheese and crackers (rare) well you do have to make some exceptions. Thanks for the tips - I can never get enough of those! Vandal Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCY- 2/15/2010 8:42AM

Eat my veggies first. Fruit is a great dessert or snack. Savor each bite. Drink a glass of water or cup of tea before you eat. Plan your meals. I plan the week out on Sundays, Report Inappropriate Comment

FREELADY 2/15/2010 8:15AM

Teachinkids2, is there any of these that worked well for you? Report Inappropriate Comment

TEACHINKIDS2 2/15/2010 8:06AM

tips...thanks for sharing! A few of those I have heard of and a few I have tried before Report Inappropriate Comment

DAY 23: Unfair? Deal with it!

Saturday, February 13, 2010

What has helped me most when I have that feeling of unfairness is to think about FACTS that Beck gave: Most thin people DO restrict their eating.

They may not consider themselves on a diet, and many of them don't talk about it a lot or call attention to it. But they repeatedly choose healthier, lower-calorie options. They also stop eating when I would still be wanting more and more. If a special evening event will be more indulgent, they eat light the first part of the day.

I do have some thin friends. I keep watching them. It is fascinating. Beck is right; they don't eat whatever they want, whenever they want.

Some people eat much more than I can because their activity and exercise level is extremely high. My son has a heavy-lifting job and also plays basketball several hours a day, six days a week. His calorie requirements reflect that lifestyle!

Part B of what has helped my thinking is my deep, soul-solid conviction that ultimately, eternally, the universe is actually fair. God is utterly just. I simply don't know the whole picture in this lifetime; I cannot see what God sees.

The best closing word is from NUSL8T on the forum : "It's not unfair that I need to do the things that nourish me instead of continuing with my old patterns that hurt me."

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TORNADO40 2/14/2010 6:54PM

You are right. Thin people are not just sitting around and pigging out. They eat a lot less than we do and they exercise a lot. My husband is thin, but he exercises like crazy. Let's face it, most fat people are fat because they eat way too much of the wrong things. Plus they really don't exercise. You don't get to 400 pounds by eating very little and eating healthy. You can claim it is not fair, but the human body was not really designed to eat what most of us eat and not do any exercise. We can change these things that got us fat, but we can never go back to the old habits and expect to keep the weight off. If not being able to eat what ever we want and in what quantities we want then oh well...boo hoo hoo. Report Inappropriate Comment

TORNADO40 2/14/2010 6:54PM

You are right. Thin people are not just sitting around and pigging out. They eat a lot less than we do and they exercise a lot. My husband is thin, but he exercises like crazy. Let's face it, most fat people are fat because they eat way too much of the wrong things. Plus they really don't exercise. You don't get to 400 pounds by eating very little and eating healthy. You can claim it is not fair, but the human body was not really designed to eat what most of us eat and not do any exercise. We can change these things that got us fat, but we can never go back to the old habits and expect to keep the weight off. If not being able to eat what ever we want and in what quantities we want then oh well...boo hoo hoo. Report Inappropriate Comment

TRAVELGRRL 2/14/2010 4:24PM

Wow, you are so right! Thin people really DO opt for the lower calorie options and eat smaller amounts. I also have noticed that at holiday dinners the extra servings & desserts are always urged on the heavy people (me) and NOT on the thin people. So in time their discipline really pays off because the food-pushers don't even bother them! Loved the blog. Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCY- 2/14/2010 9:44AM

It is a blessing that we CAN do the things that nourish us. What is unfair is how we hurt ourselves with poor habits. We need to be kind to ourselves and nourish our body. Great Blog. Keep Sparking! Report Inappropriate Comment

MAZZYR 2/14/2010 5:48AM

Thank you for the reminder " Unfair? Deal with it!" Lol, I have added with loving-kindness to it. Report Inappropriate Comment

BIGLITTLEWOMAN 2/13/2010 10:43PM

Isn't it amazing all that we learn about ourselves and others when we start observing listening and paying attention to detail? You are right on and very observant. Thanks for sharing and making me think hard. Report Inappropriate Comment

ID_VANDAL 2/13/2010 2:15PM

Nancy - you are so focused it's scary! I agree with you on the Beck's things people are thin because they balance their exercise with the calorie needs. Active equals more. I think I remember that Michael Phelps had over 10,000 calories a day but then he was swimming hours and hours a day. If I swam hours and hours a day I would drown so there you have it. Seriously you really have a great focus on this Beck's program and you are doing it very very well. Thanks again for keeping me on track! Vandal Report Inappropriate Comment

ANNANN63 2/13/2010 1:58PM

You are developing an attitude that will make you a success. Way to go! Report Inappropriate Comment

Watching Thin People

Friday, February 12, 2010

I was at an annual business meeting for my husband's hiking club. Everyone present was slim and fit except you-know-who. When the agenda was concluded, a buffet was served in the next room.

I thought this occasion was a perfect opportunity to observe the way slim, healthy, active people behave around food. After all, The Beck Diet Solution is teaching ME to think like a thin person!

When the meeting was over it was time for the meal. A few people ambled in to where the food was spread and got something to eat. Most continued animated conversations and began new ones. Gradually everyone trickled in. A few people left without eating (gasp!).

I knew the types of food likely to be offered, and had psyched myself up to choose wisely. I looked over the buffet and mentally practiced my choices before I walked through the line. I took my plate off to find a place to sit (most people stood to eat). I ate slowly. I enjoyed it. Then I went to find my husband.

He and a number of others were standing around the food tables talking (only a couple rooms were in use for this occasion). But no one was shoveling seconds onto a greasy plate. No one was grazing. No one was trying to scrape the last bite from the brownie pan. The abundant food display received not even a glance!

I looked from one to another in fascination. Then I got it. For them the eating was over; the food chapter was closed. They were done with their meals, so the delicacies sprawled around were irrelevant. It was not even on their radar. They had chosen some food; they enjoyed it; then they moved on. In that room, the most tempting thing for thin people was a discussion of one member's multi-week cross-country bike trip this spring!

I aspire to this balance. I will keep practicing the Beck principles, I will keep replacing sabotaging thoughts with helpful thoughts, I will keep building interest in areas of life unrelated to eating.

Next year I will be one of the trim and healthy crowd at the annual meeting!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GONABFIT 2/15/2010 6:18PM

that's really great! And I may try to find a chance to observe "naturally" thin and fit people. I'm laughing while I admit I have been one of those ppl who pile meatballs on the plate because I love them! I have also have been the person who goes and eats NOTHING because it wasn't appetizing/what I wanted at the time. So maybe that's why I'm in the middle... Great BLOG! Report Inappropriate Comment

5HEAVEN 2/13/2010 1:27PM

These types of meetings are interesting. Most people attend these as a way of networking and meeting others, not eating the food. :) When we are more interested in others as opposed to satisfying our flesh, we are much better off. Report Inappropriate Comment

MAZZYR 2/13/2010 8:58AM

Great observations!! The other day I was thinking about the pleasure I get from eating something delicious, and my responsibility for my health. For me, BALANCE really is my goal. Enjoying good food is as important to me as good health. Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCY- 2/13/2010 7:43AM

Thanks for sharing you insight... observations of the behavior of thin people is a great thing to do. Besides rarely the food served at meetings is something to look forward to or savor. Report Inappropriate Comment

INGRACE 2/13/2010 12:28AM

I love to people watch. That sounds like a fascinating evening. Well done on making good choices and for not scraping 'the last bite from the brownie pan." That very well could have been me , chocolate is my downfall. Report Inappropriate Comment