FREDANN   19,400
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FREDANN's Recent Blog Entries

Day 56 Accountability blog - The doctor was impressed!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

I had a loooooooonnnnnnnnnng appointment with the doctor today. Never in my entire life has a doctor spent so much time assessing my condition! He was with me for 2.5 hours!!! He asked me a gazillion questions and finally agreed that I wasn't ready to go back to work just yet. He's not sure what I have, but I need to rest some more. He gave me more time off, I have to go through a bunch of exams to try and understand why I'm so tired all the time and why I don't sleep well. He'll see me again in a month then reassess.

He was very impressed that I was able to lose so much weight "voluntarily". He really insisted on that word, "voluntarily"! No, I haven't been taking meds, no I never took appetite suppressants, no I'm not on any drugs ... Yes, I watch what I eat, yes I exercise, yes I try to face my emotions instead of eating them away. No, it's not easy everyday, but yes, I keep trying... Yes, sometimes I'm afraid I'll fall off the wagon again, but no, I don't let that fear control me. Not anymore anyways...

No, I don't have a lot of self-confidence, but yes, I determined that I love myself enough to try my best. I'm tired all the time, I feel weak and dizzy a lot of the times, and yes, I want to get better!

Is it really so hard to believe, or so hard to understand???

He seemed puzzled... then he moved on to the next topic!

Weird!!!

Anywoo... another day of accountability done. Today was hard because I had a lot to do, and I am really tired, so I did my best. I really lacked focus on the nutrition side of my journey. It's not that I indulged, it's that I hadn't planned, and so I went over on my calories and ate no freggies.

1- Exercise: 30 minutes of running done. Hubby came with me, it was nice to have a partner to run with!
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2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories. Like I said, I didn't plan in advance for today so ended eating too much carbs and totalled 2110 cals.
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3- Drink 8 cups of water at least: Fine, I had 9 cups
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4- 7 hours of hopefully restful sleep. 7 hours yes, goal met, but I woke up several times and was still exhausted this morning. I'll still take the emoticon!!
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5- Meditate 10 minutes at least: done, and more coming at bedtime.
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6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits: except for 2 slices of tomatoes I had none...
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7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog
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I try to learn something new everyday. Today's lesson: plan ahead, even if I don't feel like it or think it's not necessary. Always plan ahead!

Tomorrow's plan:

1- Exercise: probably just a 45 minute walk for tomorrow. I need to take it easy tomorrow.
2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories.
3- Drink 8 cups of water at least
4- 7 hours of sleep. The doc increased my dose of Lyrica, which I take for chronic pain. He says at a higher dose it may improve sleep. It will be interesting to find out if it works.
5- Meditate 10 minutes at least
6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. Absolutely no excuses will be tolerated! I have to be a little more firm with myself!!
7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog

Happy Thursday everyone!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NOMIS1 1/26/2012 9:16AM

    You are a great inspiration.

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PUDDLEBY 1/25/2012 11:54PM

    Argggh! Mine posted twice too! So now I will have to think of something to add. It is interesting that you note that when you didn't eat your freggies, you ate more carbs than usual. I am the same. I heard or read somewhere that individuals will consume about the same volume of food daily. So.....that means that if we eat lots of fruit and veggies, we will eat less of other things. It's all about healthy choices. (And believe me, I am far from perfect, but I am learning and improving!)

Comment edited on: 1/25/2012 11:58:43 PM

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PUDDLEBY 1/25/2012 11:52PM

    250 calories over won't ruin your weigh in this week I am sure. You should be proud of yourself. I think your doctor was so surprised because so many patients that he sees probably can't or don't do what you (and all of us sparkers) are doing. I am sorry to hear that you aren't feeling great, but I bet your healthy lifestyle is helping and will continue to help even more. I love reading your blogs! Keep up the good work!

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KAYECAN 1/25/2012 11:38PM

    I can't remember the last time I slept 7 hours. You do so well on your accountability goals. Kuddo's to your hubby for joining you in running. Two is always better than one, at least that is what Winnie the Pooh advises us.
Great day!!!
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NANHBH 1/25/2012 11:38PM

    So awesome that you are doing this "voluntarily!" Natural is the only way to do this healthfully. Keep up the good work!
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NANHBH 1/25/2012 11:36PM

    I don't know why this posted twice, so I'll change one of the messages.
You inspire me daily!
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Comment edited on: 1/25/2012 11:39:34 PM

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Day 55 Accountability blog - Choices...

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

This morning I went out to breakfast with my brother. It's an almost weekly rendez-vous we have. Restaurant-style breakfast are so high in calories, it's crazy. Now that I know though, I deal with it. So this morning, I MADE THE CHOICE to have 2 eggs with sausage, potatoes and toast. At least 1000 cals in one meal. At first it freaked me out, until I realized that after eating that, I'm not hungry again for a couple of hours. Besides, all the other choices on the menu have just as many calories and fat, some even worst. And I'm sorry, but the fruit and cottage cheese plate is like 15$ and is full of cantaloupe, which I do NOT like... I think it's abusive to expect people to pay 15$ for a plate of cantaloupe...

Anyways... focus here... I had a big breakfast, but then I was full until almost dinner time. I had a small snack, then dinner, and was able to make it all fit in less than 1840 calories. WOW! Major improvement from before.

Then I worked out, and did some jump rope, and now I am litterally STARVING!! I spent the last hour trying to figure out what I was going to do... Old habits, my first ideas involved eating crackers and other such snacks, until I remembered I have frozen strawberries and greek yogurt. There you go, I found my snack!

Unfortunately I have only 20 calories left to my day and eating celery at this hour is only going to make me hungrier and frustrated, so I am again choosing to have my healthy snack, and go over my calories by a bit. I figure it's better to eat a healthy snack than to go to bed on an empty stomach... so I'll just do that.

My point is, I am really starting to make choices and be aware of their consequences. This is feeling pretty good. I know, I could choose a lighter breakfast, but I don't want to. There!! I prefer to deal with the number of calories I consume, because after all, it's not everyday I eat such a big breakfast, and second, if I can't have a little bit of fun along the way, then this journey is just not going to be worth it!

As for the rest of my goals:

1- Exercise: I felt really sore after yesterday's intense step aerobics session, so I decided not to run today. Instead I did a 33-minute stretch/yoga workout, which felt absolutely wonderful! In fact, I wondered why I don't do it more often... I really don't have an answer! Then I felt like doing more, so I took out my jump rope, which had been hanging on a hook for almost a year, and did 10 minutes of jumping! Awesome!!! So 43 minutes of exercise today means one thing:
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2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories. Currently I am 1840 cals. I WILL have my snack, so will be up to 1973 cals. Okay with me!
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3- Drink 8 cups of water at least: I drank 10 cups today.
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4- 8 hours of sleep: nooooooo... I was in bed 7 hours and woke up what felt like a hundred times during the night...
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5- Meditate 10 minutes at least: did 20 minutes, more to come at bedtime.
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6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. I had 3 veggies and 2 fruits, that's including the frozen strawberries I'm about to eat!
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7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog
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Not a bad day... there's room for improvement of course, so I'll be back tomorrow and will continue to try hard to meet my goals!

Wednesday's plan:

1- Exercise: back to running tomorrow, 30 minutes
2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories.
3- Drink 8 cups of water at least
4- 7 hours of hopefully restful sleep.
5- Meditate 10 minutes at least
6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits.
7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog

I hope everyone will have a happy Wednesday!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAYECAN 1/25/2012 7:33PM

    You are right about having fun along the way or else it won't be worth it, in fact, it wouldn't be liveable!! I agree with NANHBH about planning for such things. It's a skill we probably will all learn along the way the more sparking we do. Thanks for the accountability inspiration. You are doing so great.


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NRSSNOW 1/25/2012 2:11AM

    I think I am stealing your accountabilty blog idea. It is really inspirational to read your daily blog, I love it that you fall off the wagon sometimes and get right back on. It really empowers me to keep going even when I fail somedays.
Thank you,
Kim emoticon

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NANHBH 1/24/2012 10:42PM

    I agree that special occasions are reason to splurge on calories - as long as you plan for them, as you did today. If this is a weekly event and you don't want to eat 1,000 calories at one meal everytime, do they have oatmeal and fresh berries on the menu?
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SUPER-MOM_ 1/24/2012 10:35PM

  That's a lot of accountability in that post! Whew! I see your 30lbs+ lost and going strong. Keep it up. You motivated me today

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Day 54 Accountability Blog - Today's workout makes me feel high!

Monday, January 23, 2012

I know I said in yesterday's blog that I was going to go for a 50-minute walk/run today, but honnestly I just didn't feel like it! It rained for a good part of the day, yes, yes, in January, so the ice and snow we had on the ground is turned into slush, there's water everywhere and I didn't feel like running outside. Plus, I ran yesterday, so I wanted something different. Then came the idea to do something I hadn't done in a while, step aerobics! It had been a few months so I thought, why not! I chose the toughest DVD I own, Kathy Smith's Power Step workout. It's an old DVD but trust me, it does the job!! It's 50 minutes long and you can do whatever intensity you want. I felt good, so I did the high-impact version!

Well... all this running I've been doing is apparently helping, because I did the entire 50 minutes, all with high-impact moves and jumps, and I survived!! In the past I would have a hard time sustaining the high intensity moves, but not today! However... my legs are killing me now! Actually, I'm sore all over! My shoulders and arms, my legs, my behind, my lower back, all sore!! But oh!! Does it ever feel good! I'm really proud of myself! SP's fitness tracker says this workout had me burn 992 calories. I thought it was exaggerated at first, but you know what? Maybe not!!

After working out I made dinner, steak, oven-baked sweet potatoes and glazed carrots. YUM! It looked too delicious, I had to take a picture!



When I looked at the picture I noticed I had filled more than half my plate with the sweet potatoes and carrots. More than half in veggies, nice! An improvement from before, when the veggies would only take a small corner on my plate!!

All this to say, I had another great day! Let's review my goals:

1- Exercise 50 minutes: check! As intense as running may be, today's workout was definitely at a higher level!!
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2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories: Done! 1841 calories! Carbs, proteins, fat and salt also within ranges!! Second day in a row I stay within all ranges!
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3- Drink 8 cups of water at least: I drank no less than 12 cups today!! I just hope I won't be up all night visiting the bathroom!!
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4- 8 hours of sleep: Well, I only slept 7 hours last night. To some this may sound like a good night, but not for me. I need at least 8 hours... Working on it!

5- Meditate 10 minutes: I did 20 minutes before bed last night, 10 minutes this morning and another 20 minutes in the early afternoon. I think this means goal met!!
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6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. I had 2 fruits, and I had all the veggies on my plate for dinner. 2 veggies at least. Missing one of each...

7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog
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I must say, I am loving this! I feel good, I feel so much healthier than before. It's becoming easier and easier to meet my goals every day. So on I go!

This reminds me, I came across this inspirational quote this morning, very appropriate I think:

"Success doesn't come to you... you go to it." - Marva Collins

Guess which direction I'm headed?!! Oh yes, I'm drawing the map to success!!!

Time to plan for tomorrow:

1- Exercise: technically tomorrow should be running day. I'll see how it goes, if I'm really sore from today's workout I may just do some walking. If not, I'll run for sure.
2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories. I really don't have an excuse not to make it happen!
3- Drink 8 cups of water at least
4- 8 hours of sleep. Early bedtime tonight, I need to rest my muscles...
5- Meditate 10 minutes at least
6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. No excuses!
7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog

I'm feeling really high, can you feel it!!! I'm loving it!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PUDDLEBY 1/24/2012 8:33PM

    Way to go Fredann! You should be proud of yourself. (I had to laugh to myself at work today....There was a baked cracker type snack out at work....and I overheard one of the staff saying "if it tastes good then spit it out" and I couldn't help but think our our spit vs swallow game on nightowls!)

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COOPAH 1/24/2012 6:41AM

    w00t good job! emoticon

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SPARKPARTYGIRL 1/24/2012 5:55AM

    emoticon

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NANHBH 1/23/2012 10:59PM

    Great job today! Tasty looking meal there - YUM!
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BELLAWINTER 1/23/2012 10:58PM

    Way to go FREDANN , Great Job! emoticon

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Day 53 Accountability blog - Contemplating rewards...

Sunday, January 22, 2012

I've never been one to reward myself, ever. I'm more the kind of person who will be really hard on herself and blame herself for the slightest little thing. But rewards?? nope, never! Mind you, if I need anything I'll just hop in my car and go get it! Except if I do something good, I won't have the reflex to reward myself. Well, today I started thinking maybe it was time to change that!

I am really anxious to get down to 230 lbs!! It's like a magic number, a phychological barrier I have to cross. In 2010 I got down to 230 lbs from 271 lbs, then lost my motivation, got sick and gained 25 lbs back. I've lost 17 of those lbs, and I just cannot wait to lose the other 8, then start something new and conquer the 220's!!!

So I decided that to motivate myself I was going to establish a reward system! Starting today, for every pound I lose I will set aside 5$. Last Friday I weighed in at 238.4 lbs. So I will do this until I reach 230 lbs. 8.4 lbs times 5$ is 42$.

When I reach my goal of 230 lbs, I will take the 42$ and buy myself something really nice! Or maybe I'll get streaks in my hair, or get a massage, anything that will be just for ME!! I haven't decided yet, and it's not really important for today, the point is that I will reward myself well, because you know what?? I DESERVE IT!!!

When that's done, I will set another reward for every 10 lbs I lose, until I reach my goal weight. Reasonnable enough I think!!

I absolutely cannot wait to reach 230 lbs!!

As for my goals, well I really got back on track today after yesterday's junk food fest!!

1- Exercise planned was a 30 minute run. I did 33 minutes plus my stretching routine.
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2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories: Done! 1813 calories! Carbs, proteins, fat and salt are also within ranges!!
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3- Drink 8 cups of water at least: actually drank 10 cups!
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4- 8 hours of sleep: Done and it felt good! I even took a short nap this afternoon!
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5- Meditate 10 minutes: I'll do it as soon as I finish here. I'm looking forward to it!
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6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. No excuses! Almost: did 3 veggies and 2 fruits = 5 freggies. Close enough!
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7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog
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I'm really happy with my day! Tomorrow's plan:
1- Exercise: 50 minute walk/run
Goals 2-7 - REPEAT TODAY!!
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Nightie night sparkers, keep making it happen!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JANETRIS 1/23/2012 2:51PM

    I can't wait to see what you buy for your reward! Way to go!...Jane emoticon

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NANHBH 1/23/2012 10:10AM

    WOO HOO! I love the fact that you are going to reward yourself - because you DO deserve it! Can't wait to hear what you decide to do to treat yourself. Shouldn't be too much longer before you reach that 230 mark. Thanks for your inspiration, once again. Maybe I need to think about a reward for myself.
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JAMBABY0 1/22/2012 10:51PM

    Good night

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Day 52 Accountability blog - Ate too much and feeling yuck...

Saturday, January 21, 2012

I think I am slowly becoming allergic to overeating and mostly overeating bad food...
Blah!!! I didn't eat well today, I ate too much salty food and I am really feeling YUCK! How is this different from before, when I ate like this almost on a daily basis??? Good question! The difference now is that I am aware of what I am putting in my body, and I study my reactions to food. Awereness, mindfulness, meditation... I am aware of what I am doing...
In the past I would just stuff myself. I would feel yuck, just the same, but I would ignore and deny the feeling, then I would go for more.

Apparently I can't do this anymore. Because in the past 52 days, since I started this accountability plan, everytime I ate bad food, I felt this bad. Since I am only human, I continued to have the occasional junk food. Never as often as before but still, once or twice a week. I think today was when I really understood that junk food makes me feel miserable. But more importantly, that I NO LONGER CARE FOR FEELING MISERABLE!!!

When I eat well, have my freggies and stay within my calorie range, I feel like this:
- energized
- proud
- light
- confident
- healthy

At the moment, I feel:
- disgusting
- tired
- fat
- bloated
- my mouth is dry
- I have a headache

I don't care for how I'm feeling at the moment! I deserve better! I am worth a lot more than this... it's not fun!!!

Note to self: I am writing all this so that I can remember the feeling. Once it's in writing I can no longer deny it. It becomes real. So there, I am not happy with the way I am feeling...Next time I want to eat junk food, I'll think about it twice, and hopefully will select a better option.

So what did I do today that was so terrible? Let's review my daily goals:

1- Exercise: none scheduled, rest day.
2- Track my food and stay within range. Exceptionnally Max 2000 cals. Well, I totalled a whopping 2642 calories today!!! 111g of fat, 308g of carbohydrates, 4703g of salt!!!!!! Enough said!!!
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3- Drink 8 cups of water: Well, it was easy to flush down 10 cups of water under the circumstances!!!
4- 8 hours of sleep: Slept 7 hours last night, 1 hour short on my goal.
5- Meditate 10 minutes: done
6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. hahaha!!! what do you think??? 2 veggies, 0 fruit...
7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog: done...

Not a good report, I know. That's why this accountability thing is so important, so that I can see what I am doing and not do it again...

So. Please don't judge me. The day is over, I am learning from my mistakes, and I will make tomorrow better. Because I am worth a lot more than what I did today!

Sunday's plan:

1- Exercise: 30 minute run
2- Track my food and stay within range. Max 1860 calories, made of good, healthy food!
3- Drink 8 cups of water at least
4- 8 hours of sleep
5- Meditate 10 minutes
6- 3 veggies and 3 fruits. No excuses!
7- Report my progress to the world every day by writing my accountability blog

I think it will be feasible, because I just want to feel good again!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NANT406 1/22/2012 9:00AM

    It sounds like you've learned a lot about yourself by sharing your Accountability Blog. emoticon I've recently had an epiphany that I know will help me in my journey. emoticon It great to realize some of the issues that cause overeating, binging and portion distortion (all areas I need to improve on). Thanks for setting an example for accountability and emoticon on your progress. emoticon

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PUDDLEBY 1/22/2012 5:03AM

    We can't be perfect all of the time! But we learn from all our experiences as you have eloquently stated above. I remember hearing a quote about "just because you can hit one homerun, doesn't mean you can do it everytime". As long as we are making some progress and learning, I think that is what counts the most. I worked nights the last two nights, and did great my first night, then the second night I overdid it in carbs. And I know what you say about feeling yucky both physically and psychologically when overeating. But we are in this for the long haul and aren't going to throw in the towel! Great accountability blog!

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NANHBH 1/21/2012 11:34PM

    Great awareness! You do deserve to feel good all the time. Keep up the good work!
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