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April 19, 2010

Monday, April 19, 2010

Oh wow, I am getting kinda nervous about exams. My first one is tomorrow morning, and I have a second tomorrow afternoon. Then one on wednesday, and one on thursday. But even more worrying, this thursday evening, at my dance studio's practice party, I am doing another routine in the floor show. I'm doing the chacha, and the worst part about that is that I have my dance lesson today but it's not with my normal instructor, it's with another instructor. But at the party, I'll be dancing with my normal instructor, so I'm kinda worried that today won't really be preparing me very well. I should be more worried about exams, but the routine is more nerve wracking for me. I'm kinda freaking out a bit right now. Hopefully I'll be ok.

I am going to the social anxiety study tonight, so maybe I'll learn something to help keep the worry to a minimum.Oh crap, i didn't finish all the homework for it. Guess I should get going on that.

Have a great week guys!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WEIGHTING4BABY 4/19/2010 9:44PM

    I agree with Katrina about the destressing! I think you'll do great, Roxy. :)

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MESSENE 4/19/2010 4:26PM

    emoticonBest wishes! Hope all goes well. emoticon emoticon

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KATRINAWINDHAM 4/19/2010 3:40PM

    I work at the Rec Center at a university and around finals time, we always have a display that shows scientific fact that working out helps decrease stress. (even though it's extra hard to find the motivation to work out when you're already stressed).
BUT, good luck on your exams and definitely take time for yourself to take a break and go outside, and take a walk...anything to get you de-stressed and feeling good! :)

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April 14, 2010

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I'm starting to stress about exams next week, and also my chacha routine next thursday. I'm thinking of pushing the routine to the next party because of exams, but i don't know. I did finally get one of my midterm marks back, one i was so worried i had failed, and i got 65. So not great, but better than a fail that's for sure ^_^

This past monday i went to the first day of the social anxiety treatment study. No one talked much lol. We did this weird thing with a raisin. We held it in our hands and was just kind of contemplating it. We were told to pretend we'd never seen one before, it was kind of interesting. Something I noticed about it that I never have before, was that it looks like it has a white powder on some parts of it, and that it rubs off. Not really important, but kind of interesting ^_^ We're supposed to do that when eating once every day this week, really notice what we're eating and pay attention to it. I find it kind of silly and a bit tedious, but I'm sure there's a good reason we're doing it.

Last night i also started a new dance class. It's an advanced group class. We worked on the waltz and the foxtrot and then moved on to the Viennese waltz. Holy geez, it's hard. The waltz is nice and slow but this one is just dizzying lol. The music is twice as fast at 60 beats per miniute. That's one step every second while spinning. I got really dizzy and was having trouble making big enough steps, and then when i was supposed to do small steps, they weren't small enough lol. We've only done one step so far and he called it a natural turn. We were trying to go from one end of the floor to the other doing just that one step, I was horrible at it lol, but it was fun. It'll be interesting to see if i can get it before the end of the 8 week course. Hopefully, when we do the quickstep, it won't be quite as difficult. i don't think are quite so many turns in the quickstep ^_^

With this new class, I'm now dancing 3 or 4 times per week, then hapkido twice, and the gym once or twice as well. I'm actually a little worried i'm going to have to slow down with the dancing. My foot has been hurting a lot lately, I think I just overworked one of the muscles in my foot or something. It hurt a lot last night and today too. I'm trying to take it easy other than my classes, so I'm wearing my good runners all the time and trying to do as little walking and stuff as possible in between all my classes. hopefully that will be enough because I'm having so much fun with the dancing. I know when I start losing weight too, it will get better.

I am doing a little better, though this morning I didn't have the fruit smoothie i planned, I had mcdonald's breakfast instead. For lunch though I was better, I did buy lunch at school, but I spent more money so i could get something relatively healthy. I had a thai chicken wrap, but mostly it was sauted veggies, and it came with sweet potato fries and salad. It was very good, wasn't huge portions, just right, and was much better than the a lot of the other stuff they have in the caf. And for dinner, I plan on having some of the soup I recently made, and i dunno what else. i am making up for my blunder with breakfast, i just let the stress of impending exams get to me because of a horrible dream i had lol. I'm feeling better now though with the mark I was surprised to get.

I think that's about everything that's going on with me lately. So have a great rest of the week everyone!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIFEGENESIS 4/15/2010 11:59PM

    SO JEALOUS of your schedule! Man! :D Sounds like so much fun!

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TAHITIBLOSSOM 4/14/2010 12:14PM

  Your dance lessons sound great! I love the fox trot & dancing is just good exercise while you are having a lot of fun at the same time!

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April 12, 2010

Monday, April 12, 2010

I may not be feeling super positive or anything lately, but I am finally getting back on track with my eating. Last night, I wanted to go through McDonald's on my way home from dancing, but resisted. I just had some fruit juice when I got home instead.

I went out yesterday and bought an immersion blender so I can start making more soups, its so much easier. So I made tomato basil soup yesterday. It's so good, and so easy ^_^ I plan on picking up one of those magic bullet things too, so I can start making fruit smoothies without using my blender because then it's such a mess. So, I will be getting more fruits and veggies in my diet, which is what I really need right now, and also less convenience foods. I mean a smoothie for breakfast would be really awesome, so long as i actually do it, and soups are a great way to fill up before a main meal. No creamy soups though unless it is the main meal. Now if I buy a protein powder to add to my smoothie, that would be a whole meal right there. And of course i can put whatever I want in soups ^_^

Then also, I am starting a new dance class this week, which is 8 weeks long, so I'll be getting even more exercise in. It's an advanced course, so we'll be learning the quickstep and the viennese waltz. There are about 10 of us going together, it's all people i dance with on sundays. They really are a great group of people. I'm so glad I met them at my dance studio and go out with them all the time.

Tonight, I'm also starting that study for social anxiety disorder. I don't think I'm as bad as I was even a few months ago when I signed up for it. Hopefully this will help even more though ^_^

Oh, I danced with a complete stranger last night ^_^ There is this couple that we always comment on, they're Filipino, and they're great dancers. They are really good at the latin dances. He asked me to dance last night, for a chacha. He led some things I'd never done before, but it was great fun. He's also quite short, so I felt like i needed to shrink to fit under his arm for the turns, but I managed ^_^ Then after a couple people in our group asked me to show them how to do a certain move, and I couldn't because I was just trying to follow this guy but i didn't really know how to do myself lol. He said I did well though, definitely an ego boost ^_^ and that next week we'd do the rumba lol. I also took the leftover cake from my sister's biorthday. No one wanted to take it home, so i sid i know where I can get rid of it. i had to freeze it though, or I would have eaten it ^_^ everyone loved it, it was that brown sugar banana one with fudge frosting. I had almost 3/4 the cake left so I definitely didn't want to be eating all myself. I did have a piece last night though.

Anyway, that's enough from me. I'll let you all know how the social anxiety therapy goes tonight. I'm hoping to be back in time to make it to hapkido, though it may be close. Depends on traffic.

Have a great week everyone!!!

  


April 12, 2010

Monday, April 12, 2010

I may not be feeling super positive or anything lately, but I am finally getting back on track with my eating. Last night, I wanted to go through McDonald's on my way home from dancing, but resisted. I just had some fruit juice when I got home instead.

I went out yesterday and bought an immersion blender so I can start making more soups, its so much easier. So I made tomato basil soup yesterday. It's so good, and so easy ^_^ I plan on picking up one of those magic bullet things too, so I can start making fruit smoothies without using my blender because then it's such a mess. So, I will be getting more fruits and veggies in my diet, which is what I really need right now, and also less convenience foods. I mean a smoothie for breakfast would be really awesome, so long as i actually do it, and soups are a great way to fill up before a main meal. No creamy soups though unless it is the main meal. Now if I buy a protein powder to add to my smoothie, that would be a whole meal right there. And of course i can put whatever I want in soups ^_^

Then also, I am starting a new dance class this week, which is 8 weeks long, so I'll be getting even more exercise in. It's an advanced course, so we'll be learning the quickstep and the viennese waltz. There are about 10 of us going together, it's all people i dance with on sundays. They really are a great group of people. I'm so glad I met them at my dance studio and go out with them all the time.

Tonight, I'm also starting that study for social anxiety disorder. I don't think I'm as bad as I was even a few months ago when I signed up for it. Hopefully this will help even more though ^_^

Oh, I danced with a complete stranger last night ^_^ There is this couple that we always comment on, they're Filipino, and they're great dancers. They are really good at the latin dances. He asked me to dance last night, for a chacha. He led some things I'd never done before, but it was great fun. He's also quite short, so I felt like i needed to shrink to fit under his arm for the turns, but I managed ^_^ Then after a couple people in our group asked me to show them how to do a certain move, and I couldn't because I was just trying to follow this guy but i didn't really know how to do myself lol. He said I did well though, definitely an ego boost ^_^ and that next week we'd do the rumba lol. I also took the leftover cake from my sister's biorthday. No one wanted to take it home, so i sid i know where I can get rid of it. i had to freeze it though, or I would have eaten it ^_^ everyone loved it, it was that brown sugar banana one with fudge frosting. I had almost 3/4 the cake left so I definitely didn't want to be eating all myself. I did have a piece last night though.

Anyway, that's enough from me. I'll let you all know how the social anxiety therapy goes tonight. I'm hoping to be back in time to make it to hapkido, though it may be close. Depends on traffic.

Have a great week everyone!!!

  


April 8, 2010

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Well, this week hasn't been going so well. I was doing fine until a couple weeks ago. Now I'm stressing about everything, school, exams, work, eating and exercising, and now my mom. I talked about it in previous blogs but she got some of the test results back, apparently she is having lots of mini strokes, and now there's a chance she may have breast cancer, I don't remember if I mentioned that before. I was fine, not worrying too much about her until last week. I think i was just keeping busy enough that it didn't really sink in. I know there are lots of people out there much worse off, but she's my mom, I don't know what I would do without her.

Anyway, i haven't even been to school this week, except yesterday, and I left half way through class because i just couldn't stand to be around so many people. I just want to be alone for a while. I've been kind of depressed again. I know it'd not really again, it's just when I'm not busy I start to notice it. Lately, it's been worse though, like not being able to go to class, and that's really bad, i have exams in a couple weeks. Then this morning, I went to my new gym and worked out with my new trainer, and I think I probably annoyed him, i was so negative and had no energy. he was really nice though, and my legs still feel all rubbery. I worked hard, for my current energy level and mood.

There's a practice party tonight at my dance studio, and I really don't feel like going. I am though, I always have fun and feel good when I'm there, but the good feelings don't last long enough afterward. My chacha routine is in 2 weeks, at the next party, and I sure hope I'm feeling better then, or I might freak out a little too much.

I just don't know what to do right now, i need to go to class but i can't handle being around that many people right now. I'm gonna try and learn as much as I can at home, on my own, but I don't know if that'll be enough. Hopefully, next week, I'll be able to go. Next week is the last before exams and I'm really worried. Too much is going on at home and in my head right now, so I'll be lucky if i pass everything. I'll certainly let you guys know when I find out. I may be able to pull it off this term because my teachers do have a lot of stuff online, and I do have all my books.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GAYLE73 4/8/2010 7:02PM

    I feel so bad for you! :( You have every right to feel discouraged and overwhelmed. I can't even imagine tying to cope with all that stress alone! I will be praying for you.

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CMKOBE 4/8/2010 3:32PM

    Sounds like official depression. Anytime you want to talk, let me know. I feel alone out here. No parents, no real 'best friend'--just a lonely woman trying to look beautiful and hide her sadness but put on a happy face for two beautiful children. But as much as it is hard to go to class or go to your exercises, don't you feel better when you're done? It lifts your mood. Or go punch a wall. But any time you want to chat let me know.

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