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FLUTTEROFSTARS's Recent Blog Entries

Who is in your corner?

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

I happened across a fellow sparker's blog describing "mental toughness" coaching, and the free 21-day "fatloser.com" program. I signed up for it, and have been really enjoying it.

In today's video, our mental toughness coach described his own mentor, and how - as he learned to be a public speaker - his mentor was always beside or behind him. Now that his mentor has passed away, he wears a necklace to remind himself that his mentor is with him in spirit, loving him and "wanting him to win".

It made me think about all the people who are in my corner -- all those who want me to win. I know my parents have always felt a little burdened that I struggle with my weight - they want me to live my fullest and happiest life, and my pain is their pain. They are certainly on my side! My sister, too, knows how much I want to be healthy and is cheering me on. My boyfriend has been so strong for me, too - he even joined me in skipping desserts at all of our Christmas parties this year! I have two great groups of friends who want me to succeed - some of whom have struggled with their own weight. And I have a wonderful group of colleagues where I work, and mentors at school, who have told me they believe I can achieve any goals I set for myself (professionally and otherwise!). There is also such a wonderful community here at Spark, filled with people changing our lives together and cheering each other on. And there are perfect strangers across the world who want the best for me - people like Steve Siebold, who offered this mental toughness coaching seminar for free. And even people I can't name, and whose lives have only briefly touched mine or maybe never will - I can imagine that there's a whole world out there who want the best for me. For example, any time I've needed help - whether it's when I've couchsurfed, or just needed directions - the world has always been an amazingly loving place.

So with so many people - and a whole universe - in my corner, how can I tap into this strength and this energy when I need it? Life can be hard, and it's easy to feel alone when I'm struggling. Today I put on a favorite ring that my mom had given me, and designated it the "universe wants me to win" ring! I'm hoping that if I wear it daily, it will remind me of all the people who love me and who are cheering me on in this journey.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MILLIE5522 1/20/2014 5:07PM

    What a lovely thought! I'm cheering for you too now!! emoticon

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DOOBRIE 1/15/2014 12:22PM

    Lovely blog - what a great idea!

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MONETRUBY 1/14/2014 7:15PM

    This sounds great! It's so important for us to know and understand who is out there "on our side" and is rooting for us. So we know we are not alone, and have someone who is there for us, when we need the support. Sounds like you have a great network on your side.

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 1/14/2014 4:25PM

    It sounds like this is a wonderful program. Great idea with using a physical focus for the reminder. I have a favorite ring my husband bought me that always makes me smile and feel better. Hmm... I might have to wear it more often.

Thanks for sharing!

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1CRAZYDOG 1/14/2014 3:16PM

    What an awesome idea -- a "the universe wants me to succeed" ring! " We DO have to believe that the universe conspires WITH us in so many ways to succeed. That's a great visual reminder!


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Inspiration and Renewal

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

I haven't posted a blog in a very long time. Even though I've been back Sparking for a while now, I just hadn't felt the urge. But SEPTEMBERSPIRIT posted an incredibly beautiful blog entry on "20 Things to Let Go for the New Year", and it inspired me to put "pen to paper" (or fingers to keyboard, as the case may be) and do a little reflecting.

Here is her list, from Mind Body Green:

1. Let go of all thoughts that don't make you feel empowered and strong.

2. Let go of feeling guilty for doing what you truly want to do.

3. Let go of the fear of the unknown; take one small step and watch the path reveal itself.

4. Let go of regrets; at one point in your life, that “whatever” was exactly what you wanted.

5. Let go of worrying; worrying is like praying for what you don’t want.

6. Let go of blaming anyone for anything; be accountable for your own life. If you don’t like something, you have two choices, accept it or change it.

7. Let go of thinking you are damaged; you matter, and the world needs you just as you are.

8. Let go of thinking your dreams are not important; always follow your heart.

9. Let go of being the “go-to person” for everyone, all the time; stop blowing yourself off and take care of yourself first … because you matter.

10. Let go of thinking everyone else is happier, more successful or better off than you. You are right where you need to be. Your journey is unfolding perfectly for you.

11. Let go of thinking there's a right and wrong way to do things or to see the world. Enjoy the contrast and celebrate the diversity and richness of life.

12. Let go of cheating on your future with your past. It’s time to move on and tell a new story.

13. Let go of thinking you are not where you should be. You are right where you need to be to get to where you want to go, so start asking yourself where you want to go.

14. Let go of anger toward ex lovers and family. We all deserve happiness and love; just because it is over doesn’t mean the love was wrong.

15. Let go of the need to do more and be more; for today, you've done the best you can, and that's enough.

16. Let go of thinking you have to know how to make it happen; we learn the way on the way.

17. Let go of your money woes — make a plan to pay off debt and focus on your abundance.

18. Let go of trying to save or change people. Everyone has her own path, and the best thing you can do is work on yourself and stop focusing on others.

19. Let go of trying to fit in and be accepted by everyone. Your uniqueness is what makes you outstanding.

20. Let go of self-hate. You are not the shape of your body or the number on the scale. Who you are matters, and the world needs you as you are. Celebrate you!

So many of those statements are exactly what I needed to hear. One that really resonated with me is to stop fearing the unknown, to take a step forward and let the path reveal itself.

Sometimes this journey feels like one great big unknown:
emoticon At school/work, I'm wading into analyses I've never done, working to complete a dissertation which is by far the biggest undertaking of my life, and making plans to start a new job after graduation.
emoticon In my relationship, I'm currently in the longest-term relationship of my life (just over 1 year), and I can't help but wonder if we're the right fit for each-other and what the future holds for us.
emoticon On my Sparkjourney, I feel like I'm peeling off protective layers as I shed weight... (Whoops! There go my comfort-carbs and my stress-reducing-treats and my baggiest clothes and my please-don't-look-at-my-body-pounds!) Who will this journey reveal? What will my fit, healthy self look like? What behaviors and patterns will I learn, in order to cope with my emotions rather than eating them?

I think it's time for me to stop fearing the unknown, keep taking steps forward, and let the path reveal itself.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOOBRIE 1/4/2014 6:26AM

    Wonderful blog - thank you!

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1CRAZYDOG 12/17/2013 9:12PM


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MONETRUBY 12/17/2013 8:32PM

    It was so good to hear from you again! Every so often, I find myself wondering how you are doing, so it's good to have an update. I really enjoyed the list, and may have to incorporate that into my end of year reflections and new year thoughts. Thanks!

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 12/17/2013 6:27PM

    Wonderful list thanks for sharing.

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FITAT50 12/17/2013 12:04PM

    Great blog!!! I'm wishing you the best Holiday and New Year!

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BLC Mid-Point Assessment

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Looking back over my goals, I've had some successes and some struggles so far this round.

emoticon Nutrition:
emoticon I've been doing really well at keeping carbs under 50%, eating high-volume foods (soups, hot drinks, veggies), and eating lots of protein.
emoticon My nutrition still needs work. I can improve by tracking calories every day. I also need to find a way to date without eating out so much! Or to not let those restaurant meals derail my progress.

emoticon Exercise:
emoticon I'm still streaking! And I've made huge progress on fitness - physical therapy has really helped my hip, and I'm finally able to go walking for exercise again. I'm hoping to be able to start up jogging soon!

emoticon Rewards:
emoticon I'm proud of myself for prioritizing my health and allowing myself to spend !$$ on physical therapy, properly fitted running shoes, and overpronation-correction insoles (Superfeet Green).
emoticon I've also bought a single pair of Balega socks, and a new sports bra (my others are all about 10 years old - yikes!).

emoticon Weight
emoticon This is a struggle. I'm down 3 pounds (from 167 to 164) for the round, which is half of what I had hoped to lose. In order to still hit my goal of reaching 155 by the end of the round, I'd need to lose 1.5lb/week, which I am not confident that I'll be able to do in the midst of keeping up with work and dating. So, I'm going to revise my goal. I want to lose 1lb/week for the rest of the round, reaching 158 by the end of the challenge! That will still be a huge accomplishment - I can't wait to be in the 150s!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALEXSGIRL1 11/17/2012 8:50PM

    you are doing awesome hugs

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CHEEKY1000 10/22/2012 9:57PM

    Way to re-focus yourself!! That's incredible. (Want to write more, but on a tight schedule tonight.)

emoticon emoticon

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MAGGIEVAN 10/20/2012 6:33PM

    You can do it. I like the fact that enjoying nature is important to you. My wish for you is to find the balance with your goals and dating.

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LCDM83 10/20/2012 5:33PM

    I see lots of success. And determination to keep going and be even more successful at other things. You can do this.

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CHUNKYMONKEY36 10/20/2012 12:08PM

    Woohoo, great job! You are doing awesome on meeting your goals! I think you are in a gret place this round :)

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LUCYLU22 10/20/2012 10:43AM

    I love your dream board! Great job on revising goals, sometimes it is necessary so that you can avoid getting discouraged. The dating thing and eating out, I hope you can figure out the best thing for you. That is a tough one. Best wishes on finding the perfect solution. Keep it up, your goal will be here in no time!

emoticon emoticon

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FITAT50 10/19/2012 3:27PM

    Keep tracking!! I have faith you will reach that goal!

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MONETRUBY 10/18/2012 8:28PM


I love that you are still pushing yourself, but also allowing yourself to revise your goals. So important, so you don't get discouraged. And I love the collage, too!

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 10/18/2012 7:16PM

    You're doing great! Love the new goals and your new collage!

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1CRAZYDOG 10/18/2012 6:19PM

    Good job, good job, good job!! You'll get there. HUGS

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BLC: Favorite meal - is it worth it?

Sunday, September 23, 2012

My all-time favorite food is Cheesecake Factory cheesecake. Thank goodness it's expensive, so I have it very rarely - maybe once or twice a year, for my birthday or a date. The calorie count is painful: the Godiva chocolate cheesecake is 1109 calories, 42g fat, 210mg sodium, 105g carbs. Yikes! Even if I split it with someone, that's 555 calories: 50 minutes on the elliptical, or 2 hours of walking! Not worth it! Or, at least, not worth it more than once a year!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THEMRSH 10/7/2012 10:05PM

    emoticon Coming across this is perfect timing! I will be meeting Debbie at the Cheesecake Factory in a few weeks. I'm going to share this blog with her! Thank you!

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 9/27/2012 4:23PM

    Everything in moderation. Making things forbidden only makes me crave them more. When I allow myself to enjoy them once to several times a year (depending) helps me to maintain a healthy lifestyle overall.

Is it worth it? Only you can say that for sure.

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JUSTCHELLE75 9/24/2012 5:23PM

    Sheesh. Ugh

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CHEEKY1000 9/24/2012 12:02AM

    Okay, OUCH! Definitely a rare treat. I hope when you do have it, you savor every single bite without people yammering at you so that you have to gulp it down in order to reply. I hate when people interrupt me when I'm trying to savor. LOL

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1CRAZYDOG 9/23/2012 9:08PM

    With a calorie count like that I'd sure have to think it over! But once in awhile . . . maybe!

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1CRAZYDOG 9/23/2012 9:08PM

    Taste might be incredible, but I'd have to think it over for sure!

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MONETRUBY 9/23/2012 5:19PM

    Yes: an occasional indulgence is just fine, but with numbers like that, any more and it could be deadly!

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THINTASTICME 9/23/2012 4:23PM

    Just eat three bites of it...if you can, close your eyes with each bite and think about its texture and taste. Savor every bite. Enjoy

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FITAT50 9/23/2012 4:15PM

    yikes! Be sure to split that one if you do indulge once a year!

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PICKIE98 9/23/2012 4:02PM

    Wow!! I had the California omelette a few years back,, it was delicious!! the cheesecake was sinful!

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DEE797 9/23/2012 3:59PM

    I love Cheesecake Factory. Thankfully there aren't any near here. Once in a while as a treat is a good way to have it.

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Physical therapy - the hip bone's connected to the...

Friday, September 21, 2012

I had my first physical therapy appt today, and guess what I learned?! My left leg is 2cm longer than my right leg! Really?! Nearly 30 years I've spent in this body, and I didn't know this about myself???

So, this has likely been behind a lot of my problems lately - with a longer leg, that hip has to do a lot more work to compensate for the shorter leg, apparently. And if there are muscle imbalances (like the muscles on my right side seem to be weaker), then that can exacerbate the problem. Also, I pronate more on my right side, which is another difficulty that may be making things worse for me. What does all this add up to? An over-worked left hip that is now quite angry with me! (Some of these issues might also explain why my knees are often sore when I run.)

Some things I'll be working on:
1) Get insoles (superfeet green or blue) to help with the pronation issue
2) Get studier running shoes for when I'm taking up walking/jogging again (my current shoes are "too squishy" and not providing me enough support on the right side)
3) Do strengthening exercises for my arches (these are neat, involving a giant rubber tie and twisting my foot against the pull of the tie)
4) Do strengthening exercises for my hips (I learned 2 of them today - the therapist referred to them as a form of "clamshell" and "bridge" exercises)
5) Do stretching exercises for my hips (I also learned 2 of these today)
6) Do the strengthening exercises every day, and the stretches twice a day, and see my physical therapist again next week.
7) No walking or running until she gives me the all-clear (hopefully 2 weeks from now)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITAT50 9/23/2012 1:57PM

    I have Superfeet pink! Well worth the price! Fingers crossed the exercises help you heal quickly!

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STESSEDOUT27 9/22/2012 2:21AM

    It is so helpful to know what and where the problems are so they can hopefully be "fixed". Do the exercises faithfully and you should be back up running in no time.

My older sister had the same problem but had to have her hip replaced and leg lengthened to match the other. She did great and has know had a knee replaced on Saturday and was out walking her block today! Amazing! Keep up the hard work and you'll be fine! emoticon

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MAGGIEVAN 9/22/2012 1:18AM

    I know most of these exercises although I don't have the same problem with my legs. The problem with these physion exercises is that it is taking a long time to see any improvement. I hope for you it will be faster.

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MONETRUBY 9/21/2012 7:50PM

    Glad to hear that you have learned where the problem lies. Now you can hopefully be on the way to healing!

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NUTZ4HARRY 9/21/2012 3:17PM

    I have been to PT for hip, back, ankle just to name a few. I have been doing the bridge exercise for about a year. I am not sure if the clamshell is what i think it is. I stretch every morning before I get out of bed and all day I stretch my hips and back. The exercise for the arches sounds interesting.

You will see improvement if you do the exercises and the stretching. emoticon

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