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FLOWERDALEJEWEL's Recent Blog Entries

Bird Flu

Wednesday, May 15, 2013




The Center for Disease Control has released a list of symptoms of bird flu. If you experience any of the following, please seek medical treatment immediately:

1. High fever
2. Congestion
3. Nausea
4. Fatigue
5. Aching in the joints
6. An irresistible urge to crap on someone's windshield.


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEXASFILLY 5/18/2013 12:45PM

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PCOH051610 5/18/2013 7:07AM

    Somedays I'd love to be that bird!

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IMEMINE1 5/17/2013 5:30AM

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WINE4GIRL 5/16/2013 9:03AM

    i was with you till you got to "windshield"...
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DESERTDREAMERS 5/16/2013 7:15AM

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ROX525 5/16/2013 5:42AM

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ARTJAC 5/15/2013 11:44PM

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_CYNDY55_ 5/15/2013 11:43PM

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HIKETOHEIGHTS 5/15/2013 10:33PM

    Big lol, more like rotflmao

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PAMBWS 5/15/2013 5:54PM

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GOOZLEBEAR 5/15/2013 3:55PM

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MARYANN2323 5/15/2013 3:55PM

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MILLISMA 5/15/2013 3:44PM

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CATIATM 5/15/2013 3:34PM

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KAYDE53 5/15/2013 3:00PM

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JEANNETTE59 5/15/2013 12:13PM

  Go many choices emoticon

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TIME4COFFEE 5/15/2013 10:17AM

    I think a bird with a good case of it already found my windshield...

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LJOYCE55 5/15/2013 9:08AM

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OLDERDANDRT 5/15/2013 9:04AM

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GOANNA2 5/15/2013 9:03AM

    Ha, got me! emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 5/15/2013 8:56AM

    You fooled me too! emoticon

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LODESTONE 5/15/2013 8:53AM

    Knowing you, there had to be a kicker somewhere! hehehe

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LINDAKAY228 5/15/2013 8:41AM

    Oh that's funny! Thought it was serious until the last line!

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SPARKCHANTAL 5/15/2013 8:22AM

    birdie birdie in the sky
why'd you do that in my eye?

aren't you glad that cows don't fly...

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PRINCHESSA 5/15/2013 8:04AM

    roflmao @ GIA_ROSY's response... so true!

So many windshields... so little time!

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GIA_ROSY 5/15/2013 7:59AM

    Oh nooo, emoticon
I've got bird flu cause I have the urge to crap on more than one person's windshield.
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CHERYLHURT 5/15/2013 7:55AM

  OK, thanks!

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Holey Cow!!

Tuesday, May 14, 2013




























  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEXASFILLY 5/18/2013 12:43PM

    HA! My late Dad would've loved these~ he was a cattleman. Thanks, Jules~ *hugs* BB~ emoticon

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IMEMINE1 5/17/2013 5:33AM

    Very cute. emoticon

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DAP1313 5/16/2013 9:24AM

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Love it!

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DESERTDREAMERS 5/16/2013 7:16AM

    Cute - thanks for sharing these

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WINE4GIRL 5/15/2013 11:54AM

    I love these!

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SHARJOPAUL 5/15/2013 9:25AM

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GIA_ROSY 5/15/2013 7:32AM

    Love your moooooving philosophical outlook on life!


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ARTJAC 5/15/2013 5:47AM

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KAYDE53 5/14/2013 10:45PM

    emoticon for cows! emoticon

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MILLISMA 5/14/2013 8:37PM

    There are some really great ones here!!!!

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OLDERDANDRT 5/14/2013 6:30PM

    Hilarious!!!!! Thanks!!

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TIME4COFFEE 5/14/2013 5:10PM

    Who doesn't enjoy a little moo humor?

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MARYANN2323 5/14/2013 3:35PM

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MARGARITTM 5/14/2013 2:55PM

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AWESOMECHELZ 5/14/2013 1:49PM

    Today is Happy Cow day! Moo! emoticon

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SUGARBABY60 5/14/2013 1:16PM

    This was certainly no Bull! emoticon and of course UTTERLY fantastic humor!

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JEANNETTE59 5/14/2013 11:59AM

  Now you really did it! How I'm I going to explain why I can't stop laughing when DH plays "Something in the Way She Moves"? emoticon

Our song has taken 0n a whole new meaning.

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GOOZLEBEAR 5/14/2013 10:50AM

    Cute Jules!!!! emoticon

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LJOYCE55 5/14/2013 9:22AM

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LEW0213 5/14/2013 9:22AM

    Loved MiniMoo! Adorable. Thanks, Jules.
Hugs, Linda

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NASFKAB 5/14/2013 9:13AM

  lovely thanks

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PAMBWS 5/14/2013 8:52AM

    Cows are interesting creatures...& very curious!

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PRINCHESSA 5/14/2013 7:36AM

    MOOOOOOOoooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
oooooOOO!

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LODESTONE 5/14/2013 7:26AM

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LINDAKAY228 5/14/2013 7:21AM

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CAT609 5/14/2013 7:20AM

    Too funny!

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DARJR50 5/14/2013 6:59AM

  LOL!!!!!

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GARDENCHRIS 5/14/2013 6:55AM

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SPARKCHANTAL 5/14/2013 6:49AM

    is it true that cows love potato chips?

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SANDICANE 5/14/2013 6:43AM

    Fabulous "cow" stuff. Thanks for the chuckle.

I recognize some of Gary Larson's Far Side stuff! Gosh I loved him!

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LANNIEMANUEL 5/14/2013 6:42AM

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Ouch!!!

Monday, May 13, 2013




An old lady passes away and finds herself in St.Peters office with him ready to fill in her entry documents.

She's answering all his questions when this ear splitting scream is heard from next door. old woman jumps up and says

“What in heaven's name was that'?” Mary asks, Peter says “Relax Mary, its just another soul getting the holes drilled in her back for her angels wings”

So they carry on. After a few minutes, another blood curdling scream is heard. Mary was now scared and says “Whats happening to that poor woman now?”

Peter says “Mary, relax,they're just drilling holes in her head for her golden halo.”

“Oh No” says Mary “If I knew it was going to be as sore as that I would have gone down below'”.

Peter said “Mary, you would not be happy down there, that place is full of rapists and sodomites'.

“I know that” said Mary “But I already have those holes drilled”





  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

YMWONG22 5/21/2013 4:30AM

  Gosh! Can't help myself but to LOL. Such dark humor.
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WINE4GIRL 5/14/2013 6:13AM

    Ooosh! emoticon

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ARTJAC 5/14/2013 12:02AM

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KAYDE53 5/13/2013 11:54PM

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GOOZLEBEAR 5/13/2013 9:11PM

    Oh my, ouch for sure!

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MILLISMA 5/13/2013 8:18PM

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0309COOKIE 5/13/2013 6:31PM

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PDSLIM 5/13/2013 6:23PM

    ouch

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DESERTDREAMERS 5/13/2013 3:48PM

    Oh, noooo!

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JEANNETTE59 5/13/2013 3:20PM

  emoticon emoticon or emoticon

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MARYANN2323 5/13/2013 2:34PM

    You's bad! lol.

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LJOYCE55 5/13/2013 11:05AM

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PRINCHESSA 5/13/2013 10:51AM

    emoticon ROFLMAO emoticon

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TIME4COFFEE 5/13/2013 10:48AM

    emoticon Goodness!

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LINDAKAY228 5/13/2013 9:26AM

    Oh my gosh! Wicked but funny!

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RASPBERRY56 5/13/2013 9:12AM

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PAMBWS 5/13/2013 8:30AM

    That is funny. Oh, my I have a wicked sense of humour! emoticon

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SUGARBABY60 5/13/2013 8:26AM

    " I already have those holes drilled" ..... Oh dear!

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GARDENCHRIS 5/13/2013 6:54AM

    you are very bad!! emoticon

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TEXASFILLY 5/13/2013 6:18AM

    emoticon Ouch indeed! emoticon

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GOANNA2 5/13/2013 5:38AM

    Funny! emoticon

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GIA_ROSY 5/13/2013 5:06AM

    emoticon funny lady emoticon

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FLOWERDALEJEWEL 5/13/2013 4:54AM

   
Cold and wet, glad I'm inside

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SPARKCHANTAL 5/13/2013 4:39AM

    this is what we call 'galgenhumor', 'gallows humor'.
how's the weather over there?

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Funny Felines

Sunday, May 12, 2013











































  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DAP1313 5/16/2013 9:29AM

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Loved the pictures!!!

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YMWONG22 5/15/2013 4:36AM

  Cute and adorable. emoticon emoticon

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NASFKAB 5/13/2013 4:22PM

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PCOH051610 5/12/2013 9:56PM

    Loved them all

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0309COOKIE 5/12/2013 9:42PM

    Really cute blog!

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KAYDE53 5/12/2013 8:42PM

    Love the trial size!! emoticon

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MILLISMA 5/12/2013 8:01PM

    Love them all!!!!

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MARGARITTM 5/12/2013 7:53PM

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LINDAKAY228 5/12/2013 7:06PM

    Love all of those!!

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MARYANN2323 5/12/2013 3:34PM

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CATIATM 5/12/2013 3:09PM

    These are hilarious! Thanks for sharing!

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PDSLIM 5/12/2013 1:22PM

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LJOYCE55 5/12/2013 1:20PM

  Trial size is adorable.

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JEANNETTE59 5/12/2013 12:31PM

  Everyone is a Winner!

Happy Mother's Day emoticon

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OLDERDANDRT 5/12/2013 11:35AM

    These are the cutest, sweetest, funniest kitties I've ever ha the pleasure to see!!! Thank you so much!!!

emoticon
Jayne

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DRB13_1 5/12/2013 11:28AM

    isn't there an old saying - dogs have owners, cats have subjects?

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TEXASFILLY 5/12/2013 11:22AM

    Hahahaha! Loved the Cat House~ love 'em~ Thanks, Jules~! emoticon

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PRINCHESSA 5/12/2013 10:57AM

    emoticon Swear the cathouse one could be in the backyard of one of my friends!!!

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AWESOMECHELZ 5/12/2013 9:37AM

    Very funny and reminds me of some of the things my cats do. Thanks for the smile.
Love, Chelsea, Baby and Lucy emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TIME4COFFEE 5/12/2013 9:31AM

    They're adorable and funny!

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PAMBWS 5/12/2013 9:09AM

    Love the trial size...too cute.

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SUGARBABY60 5/12/2013 8:11AM

    It's always nice to upset the Town Fathers with a rowdy Cat House or two!

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DESERTDREAMERS 5/12/2013 7:55AM

    Cute kitties emoticon

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RASPBERRY56 5/12/2013 7:34AM

    Gotta love kitties!

emoticon for sharing!

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WINE4GIRL 5/12/2013 7:00AM

    kittens are so expressive!

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HELEN_BRU 5/12/2013 6:49AM

    Sweet!

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LODESTONE 5/12/2013 6:34AM

    Always wondered what was under the fridge! Now I know, and it came with a free trial size. Wonderfully amusing as usual. Happy Mothers' Day!

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GOANNA2 5/12/2013 4:51AM

    emoticon World domination is here!

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SPARKCHANTAL 5/12/2013 4:44AM

    people domination already IS ours! meow!

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The Story of Adam & Eve's Pets

Saturday, May 11, 2013



Adam and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us.'

And God said, 'I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves.'

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.
And it was a good animal.
And God was pleased.

And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail

And Adam said, 'Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal.'

And God said, 'I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG.'


And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.

And they were comforted

And God was pleased.

And Dog was content and wagged his tail.


After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, 'Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well.'


And God said, 'I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration.'

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.


And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.


And Adam and Eve learned humility.

And they were greatly improved.


And God was pleased . . .

And Dog was happy. . .


The Cat didn't give a crap one way or the other..


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WINE4GIRL 5/14/2013 6:14AM

    My neighbor's cat thinks its a dog!
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MARGARITTM 5/12/2013 7:54PM

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DESERTDREAMERS 5/12/2013 7:56AM

    Go, kitties!

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ARTJAC 5/12/2013 1:37AM

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GOANNA2 5/12/2013 12:03AM

    Really great. Thanks. emoticon

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BARBANNA 5/11/2013 7:01PM

    They are indep emoticon emoticon endent creatures and yet we truly love and adore them!

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LJOYCE55 5/11/2013 5:21PM

  perfect

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MARYANN2323 5/11/2013 3:44PM

    That is so true!! lol

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KAYDE53 5/11/2013 3:34PM

    I can believe this!! emoticon

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DRB13_1 5/11/2013 3:08PM

    Ah, pets...

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LINDAKAY228 5/11/2013 1:25PM

    Oh that's so cute! I do agree agree about the dogs (well I agree about the cats too) Dogs give us such unconditional love!

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TEXASFILLY 5/11/2013 12:08PM

    Bravo! Let's hear for the Good Lord's wisdom and His brilliance! *hug* BB~ emoticon emoticon

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MILLISMA 5/11/2013 11:46AM

    Ha, ha, ha!!!! So true! emoticon

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JEANNETTE59 5/11/2013 11:19AM

  And the reflection of CAT is TAC a short nail with a sharp point. The better to remind us that we are far from perfect! Point of fact my spelling of TACK, but I couldn't resist.

Needless to say I love this post emoticon emoticon emoticon

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OLDERDANDRT 5/11/2013 10:29AM

    Love this! And it sounds like it might have very well happened just that way! emoticon

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MT-MOONCHASER 5/11/2013 10:27AM

    emoticon

Ain't that just the way it is?!!

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PDSLIM 5/11/2013 10:19AM

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GINA180847 5/11/2013 10:13AM

    I think that is exactly the way it happened!

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TIME4COFFEE 5/11/2013 10:10AM

    Very accurate description of dogs and cats.

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KATHRYNLP 5/11/2013 9:32AM

    That's why I prefer cats... emoticon

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LEW0213 5/11/2013 9:13AM

    So true. So true. I am honored to be loved by all my dogs................ and my cats.............sometimes. emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 5/11/2013 8:54AM

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YMWONG22 5/11/2013 8:30AM

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PRINCHESSA 5/11/2013 8:16AM

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LODESTONE 5/11/2013 8:12AM

    And that's the truth! Cats are a law unto themselves. emoticon "You may kiss my paw"

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