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GETTING FRUSTRATED

Monday, December 08, 2014

It has been five weeks since I had rotator cuff surgery. I have to wear the sling for another week yet to make sure everything heals properly. I am so frustrated because I still can't do anything with my left arm. Every time I lift something my shoulder lets me know that it's not ready for that yet. I can't even sweep and wash my floors.

I have been very blessed because a lot of my church friends have come around me and helped me. I have been given meals from the Meals Ministry and one of the women in my small group even took all my laundry home with her and did it for me. One of my church friends who lives in my block said that she is going to continue to cook to make sure that I don't have to worry about preparing meals. I can cook, but I just can't use my arm do do the prep work. She treated me to lunch after church today and then gave me 5 meals to freeze for later in the week. She also came to my suite this afternoon and swept and washed my floors and vacuumed my living room for me. My son dropped by and brought me two free range chickens all cleaned and ready to cook. He said he can get more once I use those up.

I am still dealing with a lot of pain at times and I am still sleeping in my recliner. Hopefully I will be able to go for physio therapy after this week. I know my doctor told me it would take 3 to 6 months to heal properly, and that I wasn't do do anything to aggravate my shoulder. I am trying, but I am going stir crazy. Oh well, I'm just taking one day at a time. This too shall pass.


I am so thankful that I have so many wonderful friends who have helped me

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUDITH316 12/11/2014 1:17PM

    Came back to let you know you are being thought of today and are continually in my thoughts and prayers! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JUDITH316 12/11/2014 3:09AM

    Dearest Darlene,

I want you to know you are always thought of and kept close in prayer, I think of you often and have been and continue to pray for your shoulder to heal and be totally restored. I totally understand your frustration, when one has been so accustomed to doing your own housework, shopping cleaning and looking after everything that needs to be done it is a frustrating experience when you find yourself depending on others and not able to do those things you once did for yourself.

I too have been there, after my work accident I found myself totally incapacitated and couldn't do my own housework, laundry, shopping and even cooking was difficult, like you and what you shared already, I too had to keep giving it over to the Lord trusting Him to carry me through step by step, and that He did...I know what He did for me He will do for you my dear friend.. The Lord is blessing you with your Church Family who are helping and your friend cooking for you and washing the floors and vacuuming the living-room, that was so thoughtful. And your dear son bringing those chickens all prepared and ready to pop in the oven to cook. That's so emoticon

I'm praying for your complete recovery and healing, bottom line; we are all here for you Darlene, we love you and appreciate you. Thanks for your valued friendship and for helping me on the Teams...

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OPALMOON 12/10/2014 3:18AM

    Dear Darlene,
I have been thinking of you and including you in special prayers when i light a candle for those in need. I couldn't quite remember the exact time of your operation and am glad it is behind you. I've been praying for all to go well with that and your recovery, and will continue to do so. Your frustration is totally understandable. Restrictions are very challenging, and i remember all too well how being house bound last year and having so much trouble wearing clothing felt as if I was being driven around the bend. I'm dealing with all that to a slightly lesser extent this year, thankfully, though I've had to accept the reality of dealing with chronic pain. I am so glad you have had all these wonderful friends to help you and hope they will continue to do so as and when you need them. Take care and thanks for taking the time to update us with your news. Praying for continued healing for you.
Love and hugs,
Nattacia

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CAROLFAITHWALKR 12/8/2014 7:11PM

    So sorry, Darlene.

When I'm really going off emotionally, I focus on something else. When rejected, I focus on Jesus' rejection. When frustrated, I look at the big picture from a world-wide perspective and then drill down to where I am in my life with my now-small problem, and it really makes a difference.

You can intentionally change your paradigm by changing your perspective. The emotions FOLLOW the thoughts . . . be intentional about changing what thoughts you think . . . thoughts are like birds flying over, you can't stop them from winging by, but you don't have to let them build a nest in your hair.

When I don't want to pray and don't feel close to God, I sing spiritual songs outloud (or at least hum) until my spirit gets in a right place to pray.

Turn on Christian radio to help yourself, if you have a computer & internet go to KLOVE.com and click on the Christmas player. It's there 24 hrs a day. If you prefer older songs, hymns are in You Tube . . .

Have a "day of Thanksgiving" (hour, 5 mins, etc) where you write or voice-record every blessing since . . . since the surgery, since Jan 1st, since your birthday, or since Thanksgiving, or since whatever you want to do. Maybe, just since you woke up today . . .

Use the Christian disciplines to help you out of these tough places. Singing, music, prayer, gratitude, sitting in silence before the Lord. Light a candle (be careful though) and sit in silence and concentrate on blessing Him.

Think of all the troubles everyone in the world is going through . . . and how many of them would gladly trade places with you.

Most of all, know you are SAFE here to vent your frustration . . . we are for you and love you and support you and you WILL make it through this. There's not a single one of us who hasn't been similarly frustrated (and probably behaved worse than you are doing). It sounds like you're handling it all with as much grace and composure as you can, under the circumstances . . . this is what a "family of friends" is for, to do your laundry and cook and clean and demonstrate that "love" is a verb. Think about ea blessing you wrote about and say outloud, after each one, "I am LOVED!!" Because you are. Chickens - I am LOVED! Laundry - I am LOVED! Meals - I am LOVED!

We are all in the process of becoming Women of Grace. Grace and peace to from our Lord Jesus Christ . . . Emmanuel; God With Us.

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OLD FRIENDS

Saturday, September 27, 2014

I was on Facebook on Wednesday evening reviewing some of the comments from family and friends. I don't go on there very often, but I like to check to see what's going on.

I was scrolling through the posts and noted one post from a lady at my church who I had friended. While checking out her post, I noticed a picture on her page. The name noted was the same name as my best friend when I was about 10 years old and lived in the country. It was a very unusual last name, and I wondered if it could be her. I quickly sent this person a message. I told her who I was and asked if she could possibly be the girl who I went to school with. It turns out she is that girl. I can't believe it. After 60 years, I found her, quite by accident.

She asked me where I lived and I told her. She lives in a small town not too far from me. I am hoping she may come into Winnipeg one day and we can get together and remember old times. I would love to see what she has been doing over the years. She is related by marriage to the lady from my church.

I was so excited to have found her. I am looking forward to talking with her and getting to know her again.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TREKPURRSON 11/15/2014 11:14PM

    emoticon never let them go! emoticon

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ELIZACG9 10/27/2014 11:19AM

    how nice... emoticon

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APROMISE4ME 10/27/2014 7:20AM

    That's really great ! I hope that you two will get together for a visit one of these days :)

Deb

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CAROLFAITHWALKR 10/5/2014 2:18PM

    This is the best part about Facebook!

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MSLZZY 9/28/2014 10:40PM

    What a lovely surprise and I hope you can meet and see each other often.

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JANIEWWJD 9/28/2014 12:38AM

    That is really great; I am so happy for you!!!! It'll probably take you a month to catch up, but enjoy yourself!!!
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NADINEL 9/28/2014 12:10AM

    That's so wonderful! That sort of happened to me. It had been 30 years and it wasn't through FB or social media (she said she did try but did not know my legal last name). She was visiting this area and found my aunt's number in phone book. (she has had the same # for 50 years - seriously). My aunt called my mother, my mother called me.
We met a couple of days later and it was as if we had never been apart. Weird! I love it.
She lives in California and I live in Oregon. Only see her every other year.

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JOANNS4 9/27/2014 9:37PM

    That is amazing! I'm happy for you! emoticon

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OPALMOON 9/27/2014 11:27AM

    Dear Darlene,
How wonderful that this opportunity to reconnect with your friend presented itself! I am so glad that God is opening new doors for you to enrich your life. Have a wonderful time catching up with each other's news and getting to know each other again.
Hugs and blessings,
Nattacia

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1CRAZYDOG 9/27/2014 9:27AM

    Very nice!

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MM11113 9/27/2014 7:27AM

    emoticon

Finding lost friends is so rare and special.

I found a classmate from elementary school at my church a couple of years ago.

Do try to see you friend. There will be lots of stories to catch up on!

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SPEEDY143 9/27/2014 2:46AM

    emoticon glad you found her emoticon

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DJ4HEALTH 9/27/2014 2:35AM

    That is great and hope that you get to see her soon too. emoticon emoticon

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JUDITH316 9/27/2014 2:24AM

    Darlene, that is emoticon I'm excited for you, thanks for sharing your blessing... Have a great weekend my friend...I didn't know you were on facebook, guess what, I am too, let's connect there too, I'll send you my name so you can connect with me there....wow, it's a small world after all, thank you Jesus for so many blessings... emoticon emoticon

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ARTJAC 9/27/2014 1:27AM

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GABIBEAR 9/27/2014 1:21AM

    That is so wonderful Darlene! How amazing after so much time!

Have a great weekend!

Gabi
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ZRIE014 9/27/2014 1:02AM

  have a nice weekend

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ANNIVERSARY OF MY DH'S PASSING

Friday, September 26, 2014

It has been three (3) years today since my DH passed away. I still miss him so much. I have been feeling kind of down today, not really depressed, just very sad and lonely.

I know that things get better with time, but every time this day comes around it still causes me a lot of pain. My youngest son has been staying with me for a while, and he remembered too that it has been three years since his dad passed away. I know he is still grieving as well, although he doesn't show it, as he is a man and feels he shouldn't show emotions.

I still haven't made it to the grave site, but I will be there in the next few days. God is with me and He will help me with my grief. He has been with me right through the difficult days leading up to and after my dh's passing. I also know I have many friends I can call and ask to pray for me.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TREKPURRSON 12/8/2014 8:44PM

    emoticon emoticon

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ELIZACG9 10/27/2014 11:20AM

    emoticon I know it is hard...

He will live in your heart forever. emoticon
God bless.

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CAROLFAITHWALKR 10/5/2014 2:17PM

    Yes, the anniversaries of loss are always hard. Certain times of the year, too, are hard. I was in hospice with my sister this time 4 years ago. So even tho she died in Dec, when the leaves start turning and pumpkins are everywhere, it is bittersweet.

I highly respect Billy Graham. But he has never been a favorite preacher of mine.

I heard a message by Billy Graham this morning, a short excerpt of maybe 10 mins from a Denver Crusade (you know how they cut them down for the radio) and it was about loneliness. He quoted from Ps 102. And his preaching was so impactful tho he said such few words - an economy of words. And He said Jesus came to save us from our loneliness. I had never, ever looked at it that way before, nor those scriptures in quite that light before. And it was really helpful to me. It was just what I needed to hear. And that truth, that can sound trite or simplistic, really IS true: because of Jesus we really are NOT alone. We were separated from God by sin. But now and forevermore, we are NOT. He is alive forevermore, and He will never leave us or forsake us. And He is with us always, even unto the end of the world.

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BELINDA37122 9/27/2014 6:54PM

    God bless you. It is so hard on those days. All of my immediate family except my son are gone. Mama, Pop, Doug(Bunny, my brother) and his two sons and his wife. I always remember on those day and it has been years. But now it is pleasant when I remember them. They left so very many years ago, that the pain is now precious memories. (My brother and his sons were all in their 40's) But time changes the way you feel the grief. I do have four grandchildren but they are all grown and have their own lives. I am praying for you. God bless Hugs and prayers, Judy

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AQUAGIRL08 9/27/2014 4:32PM

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OPALMOON 9/27/2014 11:22AM

    Dear Darlene,
I feel for you and understand how such anniversaries can be difficult times. May the angels of comfort surround you with their warm healing light and lift the burden of your pain. I am glad you have your son with you, and I am sure your DH is very much with you in spirit. I agree that he would be very pleased with how well you are living your life. Continued prayers are with you for comfort and the health of you and all your loved ones. God bless you.
Big gentle hugs,
Nattacia

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SPEEDY143 9/27/2014 3:02AM

    emoticon emoticon for you and your family Darlene.. it's been 39 years since my 1st husband died. A life time ago and yet the pain is still there. And yes, God does lead us through emoticon I remember when your DH past. I know he is pleased that you have taken such good care of yourself since then. Remember the lovely times you had together... I know there were so many emoticon

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GABIBEAR 9/26/2014 7:04PM

    I'm sorry for your pain Darlene. My prayers and thoughts are with you. The good Lord comfort you. I'm glad your DS is with you during this time.

Gabi
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MSLZZY 9/26/2014 10:19AM

    emoticon emoticon

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NEVERORNOW 9/26/2014 9:52AM

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JOANNS4 9/26/2014 8:26AM

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LEANJEAN6 9/26/2014 7:34AM

    Oh my prayers are with you --I wish for t6he good Lord to give you strength! Lynda

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RASPBERRY56 9/26/2014 7:27AM

    Everyone's grieving process is individual, and as such, different - with time you will likely experience different emotions from day to day, month to month and year to hear.........may you find peace and comfort as you go through this special (albeit painful) day.........

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Comment edited on: 9/26/2014 7:28:18 AM

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1CRAZYDOG 9/26/2014 6:22AM

    ((((HUGS)))) and prayers. May you find comfort today and peace.

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JUDITH316 9/26/2014 5:40AM

    It is hard to lose a loved one, my prayers are with you Darlene as you reflect on the loss of your dear husband and as you remember a life time of beautiful memories you shared together. May the Lord fill you with His Comfort, Peace and Strength!

Psalm 116:15 (NKJV)

Precious in the sight of the Lord
Is the death of His saints.

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SCHECK5 9/26/2014 5:22AM

    Prayers to you...I know how you feel it's 9 years since my sister pasted also and the thoughts of missing someone you love is always in your heart... emoticon

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PURPLEPEONY 9/26/2014 4:03AM

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KRISTYTROGERS 9/26/2014 3:15AM

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PRAIRIECROCUS 9/26/2014 2:41AM

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ARTJAC 9/26/2014 2:08AM

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MANOLY 9/26/2014 1:23AM

    I understand very well your feelings, I lost my DH 10 years and a half ago and it looks like it was yesterday. I miss him a lot. We are here and God is with us, we are not alone, we have to be strong for our family and try to have a good life. ((()))

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MANOLY 9/26/2014 1:23AM

    I understand very well your feelings, I lost my DH 10 years and a half ago and it looks like it was yesterday. I miss him a lot. We are here and God is with us, we are not alone, we have to be strong for our family and try to have a good life. ((()))

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MSLADYBUG3 9/26/2014 1:06AM

    Lifting you and your family up in prayer as you reflect on the loss of your DH. May the Lord Comfort your heart and give you peace. It is hard to loss a loved one, try and remember the good days. emoticon

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FEELING BETTER

Sunday, September 14, 2014

I just wanted to stop by to let everyone know that I have been feeling better. I am so thankful for all your kind thoughts and prayers that have been sent my way lately. For the first time in a long time I was able to accomplish something today without feeling so sluggish. Hopefully things will continue to improve.

I will be seeing my doctor on Wednesday with regards to my sinus problem, and hopefully he will be able to send me to see an Ear, Nose and Throat specialist. Maybe he/she will be able to help me with the vertigo I have been experiencing as well.

I am so thankful for all those who have read my blogs and send such encouraging messages.

God bless you all.

  
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TREKPURRSON 12/8/2014 8:50PM

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WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME

Friday, September 12, 2014

I have been dealing with some health issues of late. I have been having bouts of vertigo as well as sinus infections that just don't seem to go away. I am on my fourth antibiotic for my sinus infection, and my doctor said that there is nothing else he can give me for this. We'll have to look at other things that may be causing my problems.

Because of my vertigo, I have been having trouble sleeping because when I wake up the room tends to be spinning. I have been sleeping in my recliner when I can. My son has been staying with me for the last couple of weeks, so I haven't been able to sleep in my recliner, as he is sleeping in the living room, and I don't want to disturb him.

I hardly slept on Sunday and Monday night, and I have been feeling restless and just have no ambition. I have managed to get some sleep over the last couple of nights, but am still feeling very down. I couldn't figure out why until today. September 8 would have been my DH's and my 30th Wedding Anniversary. He passed away 3 years ago. To top it all off, September 25 will be the third anniversary of his passing. I think I need to make arrangements to visit his grave again.

I will be seeing my doctor again next week, and I'll see if I can find out more about this vertigo, and see what is going to happen with regards to my sinus problems. Hopefully things will get better.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TREKPURRSON 12/8/2014 8:48PM

    emoticon Sending sympathy your way! In lieu of sleeping in a recliner for vertigo, I finally got a bed wedge so I can keep my head elevated AND sleep in my bed again. I had to sleep in recliner myself from March1 to May 1 this year with bad vertigo...Praying you feel better soon! emoticon

Comment edited on: 12/8/2014 8:49:12 PM

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