Tuesday Tickles

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Did you hear about the lizard with a great singing voice?

Her stage name is Lizard Minnelli.
________________
A man came home drunk, and his wife demanded to know where he’d been. “I’ve been to this amazing bar,” he slurred. “It’s called the Golden Saloon. Everything there is golden. They have big golden doors, golden floors—they even have a golden urinal!”

“I don’t believe it,” said his wife, but she found a receipt in his pocket the next day and called the number. “Is this the Golden Saloon?”

“Yes, it is,” said the bartender.

“Do you have golden doors and golden floors?”

“Yes.”

“What about golden urinals?”

There was a long silence and then she heard the bartender yell, “Hey, Steve, I think I know who peed in your saxophone last night!”

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FAITHGIRL91 11/24/2012 10:34PM

funny! Report Inappropriate Comment

ANDRIANA11 11/21/2012 4:46AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

FRANCES-AGAPE 11/20/2012 10:57PM

Have a Wonderful Wednesday BLESSINGS! Report Inappropriate Comment

AGK3112 11/20/2012 8:54PM

so funny.. Report Inappropriate Comment

SUNSETBREEZE05 11/20/2012 8:46PM

LOL! Report Inappropriate Comment

JUDITHANNIE 11/20/2012 8:36PM

thanks, you made me laugh out loud...... Report Inappropriate Comment

FCARMICH 11/20/2012 12:43PM

oh no Report Inappropriate Comment

TEDYBEAR2838 11/20/2012 9:02AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCYRUBIO 11/20/2012 8:56AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

TWEETYKC00 11/20/2012 8:43AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

WELLNESSME09 11/20/2012 7:52AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

MAMAHOYT 11/20/2012 7:01AM

thank you needed a laugh this morning Report Inappropriate Comment

ELRIDDICK 11/20/2012 6:59AM

Thanks for sharing Report Inappropriate Comment

AZMOMXTWO 11/20/2012 6:55AM

that is funny in a way to sad that it had to be a drunk Report Inappropriate Comment

Thankful

Monday, November 19, 2012

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire.
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don't know everything,
for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times, you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge, because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary because it means you've made a difference.

-Anonymous

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUDITHANNIE 11/20/2012 8:34PM

love it, thanks Report Inappropriate Comment

FCARMICH 11/20/2012 12:44PM

thank you! Report Inappropriate Comment

FRANCES-AGAPE 11/19/2012 8:43PM

!! B E A U T I F U L !! Have a Terrific Tuesday BLESSINGS! Comment edited on: 11/19/2012 8:44:28 PM Report Inappropriate Comment

SPRINKLECHEZ 11/19/2012 3:50PM

I am thankful that God put you into my life and that we can share our journeys together. Me and the new knee have good days and bad, but I know that hard part is worth the long term results in motion and strength. I hope you and yours have a blessed Thanksgiving Day Holiday. Your friend - "Sprink" Report Inappropriate Comment

SUNSETBREEZE05 11/19/2012 11:47AM

Amen!! Report Inappropriate Comment

TWEETYKC00 11/19/2012 8:47AM

very true, good thoughts Report Inappropriate Comment

TEDYBEAR2838 11/19/2012 8:18AM

I L-O-V-E IT! I will read it at the table with my friends tomorrow. Report Inappropriate Comment

CAT609 11/19/2012 7:11AM

Awesome! Thanks for sharing! Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCYRUBIO 11/19/2012 7:06AM

Be thankful you can read, for you can learn wisdom. Thank you for your blog. Report Inappropriate Comment

Sunday Slapstick

Sunday, November 18, 2012

What is the alpaca’s favorite musical?

Man of Llamancha.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FRANCES-AGAPE 11/18/2012 10:07PM

Not sure which one I like better Yesterday's was VERY GOOD TOO Have a Wonderful Week BLESSINGS! Report Inappropriate Comment

FCARMICH 11/18/2012 7:44PM

good one Report Inappropriate Comment

AGK3112 11/18/2012 11:02AM

for sharing Report Inappropriate Comment

TWEETYKC00 11/18/2012 9:16AM

good giggle! Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCYRUBIO 11/18/2012 8:04AM

Who ever thinks all there funnies up? A person with a warped mind? Love them! Report Inappropriate Comment

Saturday Silly

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Who is the alpaca’s favorite actor?

Al Pacacino.
_____________

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TWEETYKC00 11/17/2012 7:56PM

lol. Report Inappropriate Comment

FCARMICH 11/17/2012 7:02PM

okay Report Inappropriate Comment

FRANCES-AGAPE 11/17/2012 6:51PM

Where do find all these funnies !?!?!??! for the daily laughs Have a Super Sunday BLESSINGS! Report Inappropriate Comment

SUNSETBREEZE05 11/17/2012 10:24AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

CAT609 11/17/2012 9:33AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

MYBULLDOGS 11/17/2012 8:24AM

never really watched that much tv to be good at these games. have a great day. Report Inappropriate Comment

Friday Funnies

Friday, November 16, 2012

The lizard could never understand why humans seemed to have so many self-esteem issues surrounding scales.
___________________
Find your confidante

To keep loneliness at bay, you need at least one close relationship with someone in whom you can confide (not just a pal with whom you talk about impersonal subjects).
__________________
College kid: Hey, Dad, I’ve got some great news!
Father: What’s that, son?
College kid: Remember that $500 you promised me if I made the Dean’s List?
Father: Of course.
College kid: Well, you get to keep it!
__________________

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIRFA71 11/16/2012 11:44PM

Report Inappropriate Comment

FRANCES-AGAPE 11/16/2012 10:45PM

WHEW ! So glad Matthew FINALLY graduated ! Have a Wonderful Weekend BLESSINGS! Report Inappropriate Comment

FCARMICH 11/16/2012 7:43PM

okay Report Inappropriate Comment

AGK3112 11/16/2012 1:34PM

for sharing Report Inappropriate Comment

JUDITHANNIE 11/16/2012 8:08AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

TEDYBEAR2838 11/16/2012 7:55AM

Report Inappropriate Comment

TWEETYKC00 11/16/2012 7:55AM

that made my Friday! Report Inappropriate Comment

CAT609 11/16/2012 7:15AM

Report Inappropriate Comment