This guy goes into a restaurant for a Christmas breakfast while in his hometown for the holidays. After looking over the menu, he says, “I’ll just have the eggs Benedict.” His order comes a while later, and it’s served on a big, shiny hubcap. He asks the waiter, “What’s with the hubcap?” The waiter sings,
“O, there’s no plate like chrome for the hollandaise!”
Two would-be robbers in Benicia, California, did almost everything right: Ski masks? Check. Semiautomatic handguns? Check. Burst into the bank and order everyone to lie down on the floor? Check. Get the money? Uh . . . there was no money. It was a credit union that didn’t use cash—at all. The two men ran away (and were never caught).