FDPIECH   12,432
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I fought the beast and the beast won.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

He got out of his cage yesterday.

It's been a while. He'd been quiet... dormant... gathering strength... bidding his time... waiting for my moment of weakness...

Yesterday he attacked with a vengeance. He clawed at my insides like a cat trapped in a sack. I fought him all afternoon. I kept looking for healthy, fiberfill, bulky things to fill the need but the sirens kept of their song... singing me onto the rocks.

I had no one to tie me to the mast, no oarsmen to row me past the rocks... the mind is strong... but the flesh is weak... it was the Toll House Cookie Ice Cream Samich... WOE be it's name and it's 490 cal...

In all honesty, I only went over my zone by less the 200 cal and for the week I'm more then ok but it's a battle of the mind... this battle was lost...

I will not loose the war.

I know I am not the only one who fights this war...

Tell me how YOU keep the beast in it's cage...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TUGBOAT88 9/27/2008 8:49AM

    Your page was posted to my mailbox as a motivator. And it really WAS. It was such a good explanation of the difference between dieting and eating right, I had to forward it to my sis--we go round and round about "the journey". I , along with countless thousands, no doubt, know about the 'beast' who wants to be fed . . .and fed . . .and fed . . .I like the suggestion about having 1/2 of whatever it is and then throwing it away. I also dont think that foods should be categorised as good or bad or 'off limits'. I did find myself the other night, chomping my way through a huge plate of chips and cheese, (watching TV of course . . .) and I just 'woke up' and realised what I was doing and I threw the last third of it in the trash. . . .anyway thanks for the inspiring thoughts on eating right, and congratulations on becoming more your Self.

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PATIENTPAL 9/25/2008 9:22PM

  Read a book called "There is nothing wrong with you" by Cheri Huber. Handwritten, takes couple hours to read through. It explains the beast. You'll find tips about how to relate to the beast and you can take the ones that are useful for you. Good luck, you done good!

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MVMEME 9/25/2008 4:39PM

    i'm curious...if you had 1/2 of it when the craving started would you eventually eaten the whole thing?

did it taste as good as you imagined it would? i've found that those things i used to want and crave are no longer what i enjoy eating...i'm at the begining of this program so am curious about the longer term effects of craving etc

thanks for your summation everything is sooo true! emoticon

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KIMUSH23 9/25/2008 1:57PM

    Hey There,

Hey There congrats on your drop into the 170's...snaps to you emoticon

I pre-plan all my food one week in advance...all my meals, snacks and if I am allowed to cheat that week...my cheat gets pre-planned...if not I will make unhealthy choices and eat anything...so for me pre-planning is the only way to go!

Have A Spakeriffic Day emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/25/2008 1:55:27 PM

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UNEEKNITTER 9/10/2008 11:28PM

    It is hard. I find myself now starting to pre-enter my food for the day in my tracker so that I know I don't have any extra calories available to eat or that I am at my fat threshold. I also buy small snacks like the Pudding Popsicles and chocolate covered almonds. I bring them home and divide them into single serving sizes right away. Makes it easy for me to track and to limit my intake.

But you can do this...but sometimes it is better to tame the beast rather than caging him.

Comment edited on: 9/10/2008 11:26:26 PM

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SANDYS2100 9/10/2008 5:48PM

    emoticon

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SMALLTOWNMOMMY 9/10/2008 9:23AM

    I keep the cage at the store.

That doesn't stop my trips to the freezer.....standing......waiting..
....watching.

But, alas, nothing is to be found. It is frustrating, never finding what I am hunting for. But, the scale likes it.

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No Diets. No Pills. No Fads. Just Real Life.

Friday, September 05, 2008


I'm looking for the honest balance that I can keep for the rest of my life. So far I think I've found it.

A diet is not the answer. I've read the quote before, "DIET starts with DIE". I believe this to be true.

It's has to be a complete way of life. It just has to be. Something that you can live with, day in and day out FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE AND BE 100% COMFORTABLE WITH IT. If you can't do that with how you eat right now... you've not found it yet. Anything less and you've started to DIEt

The REAL goal is to MINDFULLY eat SENSIBLE, CLEAN, HEALTHY food EVERY day. If you approach eating this way you'll never be hungry.

MINDFUL - This is so important. You must be mindful of what you eat. By mindful I mean that when eating you should take the time to concentrate ON eating. Plate your food. Sit down. Eat it. Think about each bite. Revel in every sensation of eating. Why? Being mindful give you purpose. It slows you down. Makes you think about every bite... and gives your tummy time to send the message... HEY! I'm Full! Be mindful.

SENSIBLE - I'm 42 years old. I will NOT deprive myself. If I want A cookie (notice I said "A"), or I want A bowl of ice cream (again.. that "A") then dog gone it... I'm going to. My "SENSIBLE" 1/2 cup of ice cream isn't going to make me fat again... but eating a pint every day will. I have to live. I will not deprive myself, but I will be SENSIBLE about what I put in my face.

CLEAN - I've also cut the vast majority of processed foods out of my general eating habits. I've found that most processed food have horrific amounts of salt etc in them. If you can't pick it off a bush or tree, pull it out of the ground or cut it off of an animal, it has no business being in your body. I'm not perfect with this... but again... I am only human... see SENSIBLE.

HEALTHY - Here is where Spark is really helping me. By letting me look at what's going in the one end it's helping me make better and better choices each day as to what I eat. 1 eat 6 times a day. Breakfast - Snack - Lunch - Snack - Dinner - Snack. You can see from my log how this goes for me. On average a snack is 100-150 cal and meal is 300-400ish... and I try to keep in my overall range. This REALLY helped me a lot. Before I would skip breakfast, not eat till 12... gorge on Chili's Asian Wings (about 1800 cal), eat a few packs of Gems outa the snack machine (800 more), eat some outrages dinner and then finish it off with cereal or Ice Cream later... And wonder why I was fat... by eating how I do now... I never get TOO hungry (A trigger point for me).

More later...

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTICLILY 9/8/2008 2:39AM

    emoticon
WOW!!!!

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SANDYS2100 9/7/2008 6:32AM

    emoticon

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Some People Make Me Sick

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Today was a rest day for me.

On Thursdays I spend my whole day doing 5 min circuits between steam, dry and pool.

Well, for the last few weeks there has been a lady down in our pool doing water jogging. She's down in that pool, without fail, each morning.

Now me... being quite gregarious... have spoken with her on several occasions and she is a wonderfully nice lady. Now she is quite large. About 5'5" and about 330 lbs or so but from my conversations with her I've learned that she's lost over 40 lbs already and it trying very hard to make real change in her life and with 40 pounds already down is well on her way to a good beginning. (I told her about SparkPeople.com BTW)

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(Jumps up on soap box)

Now... that all being said... Today I'm in one of my pool circuits and a guy is just getting out of the pool from having swam in one of the other lanes and says to me... now here this...

"She's so big, with her jumping up and down like that is making tidal waves across the whole pool. It's like trying to swim in a tsunami... "

I was absolutely aghast.

I think he could see it in my face because he quickly followed up with "Oh, I was just trying to make a joke..."

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I told him "Really? I'm proud of her. She's trying to make an honest change in her life. She's lost over 40 pounds already. I, myself, would be ashamed to even THINK something like that, let alone say it to SOMEONE ELSE."

"Well I'VE never had problems with MY weight like that..." he said...

"Well, say a prayer to the lord tonight that you never do."

In the end... there are a lot of blind, callus people out there in the world. I hope this one thinks hard about just how hurtful words like that can really be.

(steps off of soap box)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AMJSATURN 9/26/2008 12:24AM

    WooHoo for defending that woman. He had never seen you before your weight lost. That could have been you. So you can empathize with all people that struggle with weight.



emoticonfor the courage to do so.

Alexia emoticon

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HEADSTRONG 9/20/2008 12:09AM

    Way to go! You should be very proud of yourself. emoticon

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JAGSOWN 9/10/2008 1:19PM

    Good rebuttal! What a loser

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KATIKINS85 9/10/2008 11:31AM

    Okay - so we need definetely need more people like you in the world!!! emoticon

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PHATCHIC411 9/5/2008 10:47AM

    wow, you are awesome standing up for her like that, when i started my exercize regime at 303 pounds people used to ride by mooing at me and oinking and most of my jogs ended in tears.Im so happy that some people never have weight problems, but they should at least support the people who are trying to make a difference in thier lives.




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ARTICLILY 8/31/2008 11:56PM

    I am proud of you for standing up.. emoticon emoticon

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SANDYS2100 8/29/2008 9:31AM

    Maybe he chocked on his foot in his sleep! Thanks for waking him up!

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BEABEAR12 8/28/2008 2:22PM

    BAH! I hate mean people! Especially on the internet--people criticize and make sarcastic comments a lot online because you can't see them. Chickens.

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CALIFORNIA-GAL 8/28/2008 2:08PM

    Thank God there are people like you who are willing to stand up to jerks like that guy. Someone needed to let him know his thoughts and words were way out of line.

Most people would have been offended at his comments but not said anything to him. I am really proud of you and totally impressed!

Candi

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RENA1965 8/28/2008 2:07PM

    I probably would have pushed him head first into the pool lol. emoticon

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SWIMMERYOGINI 8/28/2008 1:33PM

  God bless you for compassion to the one who was trying to make real change to improve herself!

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Satan Get Thee Behind Me!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

I have looked Satan in the eye and his name is...

Sweet and Sour Chicken...

Lady Piech and I went out to Fulin last night because she had a hankering for Chinese...

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My goal here is to change my lifestyle, not to deprive myself of anything so what the hey. Cindy doesn't eat that much so we usually share meals when we go out to eat so how bad can her favorite order of Sweet ans Sour Chicken really be?

I'll tell you how bad... It's a heart attack on a plate. Just half the order was over 600 calories and over 60 carbs, 33 grams of fat...

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Now I had plenty of room in my plan for it, but pretty much blew any hope of me having any kind of snack later in the night.... and we all know how Chinese food is... half an hour later your ready to chew your arm off again.

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I made it through the night without grazing but if the two of us are going to share dinners, we've got to make better choices.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1_AMAZING_WOMAN 1/16/2009 4:29PM

    Love what you're doing, and love your attitude. If it is agreed to share dinners, there 'should' be a concensous on eating healthier meals.

What I like to do is not share a meal, but ask for 2 or 3 bites from their meal (course that wouldn't do if I am out with a bunch of casual friends). That way I get to savor whatever, and still not have much of it. With time I am learning that a lot of what I used to think was just fantastic, no longer tastes that good to me anymore.

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ARTICLILY 9/1/2008 11:22PM

    I think it is our lot in life. Our family has always celebrated with chinease food. Ours is shrimp egg foo young. one serving 506 dollars. i could see yours higher with the sweetness...

Blessings,
S
is

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SANDYS2100 8/27/2008 6:59PM

    emoticon

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Thought I belw it...

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Well... That wasn't as bad as I thought.

I thought I'd blown it tonight. We went out with a friend and end up in Waffle House and I broke down and had half a waffle. I knew I was close to my limit for the day and wonder of wonders... I didn't go over the top.

Sigh... I don't feel so bad now.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ARTICLILY 8/25/2008 10:52AM

    Well on the bright side you only had 1/2 a waffle that is an accomplishment from the past, and it shows your being more self aware of your eating. I am proud of you brother. emoticon emoticon

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SANDYS2100 8/24/2008 4:38PM

    small steps

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CATHERINEKIRBY 8/23/2008 9:38PM

    Part of the gift of Sparks, is to find that we, ourselves, can handle life. You did just that...

congrats.
Catheri
ne

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