Vanity

Saturday, January 14, 2012

At work some of my co-workers are starting their 3rd "Biggest Loser" challenge (unofficially) with a cash prize (it costs $20 to participate, winner takes all). Several people have commented that I should have been in last year's competition because I would have won. Then they ask how much I've lost (70 lbs.) and how I did it (SparkPeople)...and what size I am.

That is a tricky question. I don't believe my size is accurate and it embarrasses me.

Vanity sizing has gotten out of control.

I had noticed over the years that about every 10 lbs or so I would start wearing the next size up or down. Until I reached size 14 a few years ago...and stayed there for a 30 lb gain over those years. The clothing size was growing along with me!

And then in 2011 as I started to lose the weight I still noticed the "10 lb. rule" for clothing sizes...but something seemed wrong.

20 years ago I weighed 122 pounds and wore a size 6.

10 years ago I weighed 142 pounds and wore a size 8. Based on the "10 lb rule" it should have been a size 10.

Today I weigh 132 pounds and wear a size 2. Based on the "10 lb rule" it should be a size 8.

Really?

10 pounds heavier than when I was 20 and 2 sizes smaller?!?

Yeah, right.

Clearly the clothing manufacturers are not doing us a good service by catering to vanity sizing. Sure it makes us feel better to have a "smaller" clothing size but it just helps us rationalize our overweight lifestyles. "Oh, I'm only an 8 / 10 / 12 / whatever so I'm not really "that" big; I don't need to lose weight. Marilyn Monroe was a size 12 and so am I"...except that Monroe's size 12 is not exactly equivalent to today's clothes with that size label.

Personally I'd prefer to have clothing sizes more along the lines of men's where you shop based on waist and inseam, instead of a meaningless arbitrarily assigned vanity number.

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Loser

Thursday, January 12, 2012

I’m a loser & damned proud of it!

Jan. 1 was my 1 year Sparkversary. So, as seems to be the custom, both for anniversaries and the start of a new year, here is my 2011 retrospective.

I joined on January 1, 2011, the result of a New Year’s Resolution. OK, I actually made the resolution several months earlier…we are all familiar with the “I’ll start dieting / exercising / quit smoking / etc. on Monday” promises we make to ourselves. In my case it was “I’ll start in 4 months”. I never make resolutions as statistics show resolutions almost always fail. But this time my resolution was simple…I resolved to check out SparkPeople and see if I wanted to try “it” to lose weight…whatever “it” turned out to be. It couldn’t hurt and I avoided failure by not really committing to anything.

So 1/1/11 rolled around, I stood on the scale, swore, replaced the batteries, stood on the scale again, created some awesome new curses, came to SP and created an account. The scale lies…except when it tells the truth, and it was in full disclosure mode that morning. I did all the newbie things…created a page, joined some teams, panicked when I saw the meal plan because it was full of things I don’t like or eat (dairy anyone?)…and then figured out how to turn it off. I started blogging, made SP friends, became addicted to getting points…and somewhere along the way lost a whole bunch of everything.

I lost weight and I lost inches. I lost and reached my goal of 70 lbs on September 1 – four months early. But after a short bit of time on SP losing weight wasn’t even the important part anymore. What were important were all the other things I was losing in addition to the pounds.

I lost embarrassment over my appearance. I lost a fatalistic acceptance of how I was and would always be. I lost the need for perfection that paralyzed me before I even started. I lost the start of weight related health issues. I lost the fear of not being able to do “it”, whatever “it” might be at the time. I lost the certainty of the impossible. I lost impatience, negativity, self-pity, a glass half-empty outlook. I lost the need to self-destruct.

And gained the world.

Why do resolutions fail? Because they are nothing more than wishes. And wishes generally don’t just happen no matter how much we hope they will. Wishes and resolutions are still a way to avoid taking responsibility for oneself and placing “blame” everywhere else.

You want your wish to come true?

Work your ass off for it.

Only then it isn’t a wish, or a resolution, anymore. It becomes the ultimate power…a goal.

A goal has a plan on how you are going to achieve it. A goal has a timeline. A goal has accountability which can be a frightening thing. It is so scary that many people prefer to wish things would change rather than face that monster under the bed.

And this is why SparkPeople works. You start with a resolution, a wish to lose weight and get healthy, to improve your nutrition. And SP is able to turn the wish into a goal. You input your goal weight…so now you have a specific target to shoot for. You’re asked by when you want to achieve your goal…so now you have a timeline. Your Spark Page asks for your goals…and then asks for your plan to achieve them. You track your progress and perhaps choose to share it with the community…and now you have accountability, even if only to yourself.

And that is why I am a loser.

I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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Paris Day 3 and going home

Sunday, January 08, 2012

Saturday was our last day in Paris. We started early with the Hotel des Invalides / Musee de L'Armee. Napoleon's actual tomb is surprisingly understated from what I had expected. Afterwards we made our way to the Catacombs, where 6 million Parisians have their bones stacked in an old quarry under the city, from the 18th and 19th centuries. Their remains were relocated there from the cemeteries because of plague and disease kept spreading from the mass graves in the cemeteries.

I was OK with the idea of this until I read a little further and learned that the guy whose idea this was took it a step further and decided to arrange the bones in patterns to be more interesting and get people to come and look at them (apparently tourist traps existed 200+ years ago too). A cemetery / ossuary I can understand, and be respectful of the final resting place of the dead...but somehow deliberately arranging human remains in pleasing patterns crosses the line with me. And then to read there may be a bag check as you leave, looking for bones people try to take as souvineers...seriously, what is wrong with people that they would do that?

It is a very humbling place to visit.

I had wanted to take Jacq to Montemarte to see Sacre Couer and the Espace Dali (Salvador Dali museum) but she really wanted to see the Mona Lisa. By the time we got out of the Catacombs there would not have been enough time to do both, and I've been to Montemarte before, so we went to the Louvre instead for the rest of the afternoon.

If you've been reading my trip "adventures" you'll have noticed art museums have not been on my list at all...they are not generally something I enjoy unless I have a specific interest in the particular artist or style (like Dali / surrealism) and the periods contained in the Louvre just don't do it for me. Yes, I am a Neanderthal but I just don't get the specialness of the Mona Lisa...it really isn't that attractive to me.

But now I can say I went and saw it in person.

We have not had any luck with our hotel/airport transfers. In London the guy left us at the airport; here in Paris the company was to have sent a fax to the hotel Saturday to confirm our pick-up time for the morning and failed to do so. I can't figure out the phone number to call them and when I went to the desk to ask for the hotel's help some couple was there taking forever to do whatever and I gave up waiting after 15 minutes. We will take the subway instead.

Sunday morning we go home. It will be a long day, especially coming back with the 6 hour time change lengthening our day. We don't have a direct flight and have to transfer in Minneapolis to get home to Detroit. Then a hours drive home from the airport. But it will be good to sleep in my own bed again, even if I do have to go back to work on Monday.

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Paris Day 2

Friday, January 06, 2012

Friday we started with the Arc de Triomphe, all 200+ stairs to the top as a warm-up for the Eiffel Tower. And this time I climbed straight up the entire way without having to stop on a landing to rest like in 2008 & 2010. And this time I bought the CD collection of Edith Piaf I looked at last time but decided to get at home and never could find.

We walked down the Champs Élysées...and walked...and walked...through the Tulieres until we got to where the voucher said to get on the tour bus. And waited for nearly an hour for a bus that never came, got fed up and headed toward the Louvre where I assumed the tour bus would have a stop. We saw the bus go past us but not where it stopped so took the subway to the Eiffel Tower.

There are approximately 704 steps up to the 2nd floor of the Eiffel Tower. I may have lost track of a step or 2 but my count should be pretty close. All 704 without stopping! You can only get to the top level by lift and there was another long line to do so; Jacq didn't want to wait and I've one it before so we took the lift back down to the ground instead...where we finally found the tour bus stop, exchanged our vouchers for tickets and got the map that shows all the stops.

We got off at the Hotel des Invalides, where Napoleon is entombed but got there 5 minutes after they stopped selling tickets so we will have to go back on Saturday. We then went to Notre Dame, had dinner in a cafe where I got to try out my poorly pronounced attempts at speaking French and headed back to the hotel.

Saturday is our last day in Paris, and of vacation; we fly home Sunday morning.

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Paris Day 1

Friday, January 06, 2012

Thursday late morning we checked out of the London hotel, had lunch at the tapas restaurant - I had the octopus and a trio of mushrooms sautéd in garlic and white wine garnished with garlic chives, so yummy - and headed to the train station to catch the train to Paris. Jacq was happy since we went by King's Cross station, another Harry Potter filming spot.

There was a tree down on the tracks so we were about an hour late getting into Paris. Once we arrived I discovered that now even the Metro ticket machines require a chip on your credit/debit card to use, which means - for us - it is cash only. The ATM only dispenses bills and there are no change machines around. Fortunately I still had a few euros in coins left over from my last trip here and was able to buy single trip tickets so we could get to our hotel. We also got in a lot of strength training hauling our (very heavy, at least 40 lbs. based on the weigh in I gave them before leaving home) suitcases up multiple subway staircases in both cities.

We are staying just a short walk from the Arc de Triomphe. I had forgotten just how large it is. Our hotel room is even smaller than I had expected. From the door to the bed there is a space of 3 feet; 1 foot between the bottom of the bed and the wall; 2 feet from the other side of the bed to the wall; and the headboard is snug against the 4th wall. It's a good thing we are not claustrophobic!

Jacq has announced our intention of taking the stairs to the top of the Eiffel Tower. When I was here 2 weeks for work in 2008 I had my weekends free for sightseeing, went to the Eiffel Tower, remember thinking people who took the stairs were certifiably insane and it would be impossible for me to do anyway being 70 lbs. heavier than today and so far out of shape that climbing a single flight of stairs left me out of breath with a pounding heart and buckling knees.

We shall see if we make it to the top!

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