Friday, July 04, 2014
Not mine, although in a sense I guess it is for me too.
My firstborn is DS, 18 years old. He moved into his first place last night, to live on his own.
I always enjoyed my children's milestones as a celebration of their independence. To me these are not times to be sad (but I have never really been a traditional or conventional parent either).
Although this particular milestone is not as happy as it should be. DS had to move out b/c his father, with whom he has been living for the last 2 years, kicked him out for the "sin" of DS sticking up for DD and pointing out to the psycho ex-husband (PEH) that the PEH's behavior towards DD is not acceptable by any normal standards. In a letter, not even a verbal confrontation.
So during my "vacation" of the last 2 weeks I found a place for DS to live, made the lease (b/c with no credit hstory & income level DS wouldn't have gotten approved) and arrangements to turn the power on (ditto the credit history)...and he picked up the keys and started moving in last night. Even though I will be paying half the rent DS will be contributing pretty much everything he has to his own support, which is really all I can ask. Far better to have him somewhere safe / good condition and help him out with the rent than have him pay 100% himself in a place that is falling apart and in one of the highest crime areas in the city. There are some other considerations too, so since I am able to help I will, until he finds a roommate to pick up the other half of the rent. We thought we had one lined up but he backed out because of my "no parties" rule.
But still, DS' first place on his own, not living with a parent! He tried not to show it but he was really excited & happy.