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Blog Days #5 & #6 answers

Friday, September 07, 2012

5. What is your weight history like? How old where you when you first 'went on a diet'? Have you lost and regained? How is this time different from others?

Most of my life i have been "big" and "heavy". When I was in 6th grade and 10 years old, I was 5'4" and 124 lbs. I had started wearing a bra the year before and my very 1st one was a 34B. But even in first grade the kids would call me "Elephant". i wasn't real fond of going to school. I enjoyed my other activities, but not school, especially on the way to and from. The name calling really hurt my feelings. When i look back at pictures from then, i don't think I was over weight for my height, but i guess some of the other kids did.

The first "diet" I went on was between 9th and 10th grade. i was 160 pounds and my mother felt I needed to do so. She had me eating tuna on whole wheat - 1/2 a sandwich for lunch. Sometimes she would give me some chicken meat and allow me a teaspoon of mayo and always a glass of milk. I also had fruit with each meal and when in season, i'd have tomato slices on my 1/2 sandwiches and cut up with the chicken. Once in a big while she would let me have a cup of soup (not creamy) with 5 crackers. Whenever I had it, she would add fresh veggies to it. When i went back to school after 3 1/2 months, I was 140 pounds. By the time i was a senior I was 130. I was a majorette and went to majorette camp between jr and sr year. I practiced so much in those 10 days, I really lost. I looked great and better yet, I felt wonderful!! The summer I was home from freshman year at college, I worked at a department store and lost down to 124. That Christmas I was engaged and married the next May. My wedding dress was a size 11 and had to taken in. That is the smallest size i had ever been. My husband was in the Army and went to Viet Nam. While he was there, I was so nervous all the time, that I had a lot of emotional eating. By the next summer when he got home from Nam, I was up to 140 again. The next summer was when he came home from Japan and asked for a divorce. More emotional eating. By January when I had to go to court, I was up to 165. Any way, I had events that the emotional eating kicked in to be able to handle it all. Then I would lose again until the next event!

Why will this time be different? Well, I believe it will because I now understand more about changing lifestyle. I have also learned about emotional eating, which I didn't do when I was told about each cancer and going through the treatments. I really think I have that licked. If there would ever be a time i'd go back to that kind of eating, it would have been then. I have also learned portion sizes and don't deny myself if there is something I really, really want. I simply limit the amount and how often. A good example, I love Coca Cola. Sometimes i would even have 3 a day!! Now I have limited myself to one soda a day. I have either Coke or Sprite Zero. No sugar, no salt, no calories although the Sprite does have 5 g carbs. I enjoy having my seatbelt fit again without being really tight and fitting into chairs and other places I was too big to get into. I am much more positive and don't take anything for granted. I try to exercise daily, but if I can't, I don't beat myself up over it. All of these things make me believe this time it is different and will take.

6. What has been most challenging about maintaining a weight loss (now or in the past)?

In the past, I thought it would be OK to go back to how I was eating before the loss. Wrong!! Also a struggle was with emotional eating. Being bipolar with PTSD, that emotional stuff occurred often. Now that I have been getting therapy, on meds that are adjusted so I am even moods 99% of the time, and learning how to handle the stress of an event rather than eating whatever it is, I have done better this time. Since i reached my goal weight nearly three months ago, I have been able to continue doing what I was doing. The only difference is, I have upped my calories a little to try to stay where i belong rather than lose even more.

Hope all my Buds have a great time this weekend. Y'all mean so much to me, I love each and every one of you.

Peace, love, and faith that all will be right with your world.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GINNJEN1974 9/10/2012 7:05AM

    Great blog. I think I may write one up on my weight history too.

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/8/2012 11:32PM

    Thank you for sharing your story it helps us all!

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1STATEOFDENIAL 9/8/2012 12:58PM

    Our bodies are so interconnected that anything going wrong affects the rest of us. It's good that you acknowledged the emotional and mental aspects and have found a way to deal with them. When you can focus more on the physical part of losing weight and less on the emotional/mental part it's easier than having to tackle it all at once.

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JINLYNN 9/8/2012 1:24AM

    Thank you Ev for sharing your story. You have certainly been through a lot and have kept on fighting. Your strength and courage are inspiring!

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LOLAINSC 9/7/2012 11:53PM

    Amazing what you've fought through in this through in this life. Remember the old Timex commercials--you took a licking and kept on ticking.

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BRAVEONE92 9/7/2012 10:59PM

    Ev, I was so glad to read some of your
life story. I think you are a very strong,
courageous woman. You are so talented,
and you've done so many good things.
You should be very proud of yourself,
because I am proud of you and I think
you are so emoticon! I am so
happy to know that you've reached
your weight goal and now maintaining.
Best Wishes to you dear friend. I
hope that you feel good about all that
you have accomplished in your life.

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LOSTLIME 9/7/2012 10:44PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon I hope you have a wonderful weekend too!

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Blog entry for Days 3 and 4

Tuesday, September 04, 2012

Day #3

3. Who have you shared your weight loss goals with? What has been good about sharing your goals?

I have shared my weight loss goals with all of my Spark Buds, on Facebook, my family, several neighbors, and my sorority sisters on line. I felt I had to do this to help explain what was happening. It is a good thing I did, too, since they knew this was something I had planned out to do, the weight loss wasn't totally from my cancer treatments. I believe they also understood when i requested to please not use food to tempt me. My brother and SIL paid attention and for birthdays and the holidays or just to help me celebrate a big goal achievement, they have been sending me baskets of fruit!! Oh yum!! There have been apples, pears, oranges, and sometimes plums.

Something a little humorous happened, too. Each month my on-line sorority chapter has virtual food at the meeting. Once the ladies knew what I was doing they always had something they knew I could eat for real. I thought that was very thoughtful and very cute of them. I always had a dessert on my plate, though, as I can't tolerate them for real and this way I feel I really had some. For a strange reason, just doing this via email made it work and satisfy me.

The biggest benefit I got from telling others is, it has all kept me accountable. I had a friend who I believe was questioning my loss, asked me what I did "now that you are a size 6". Since she now lives in Wisconsin rather than FL, I posted a newer picture for her on her Facebook Wall. I think she must have been embarrassed as she never said anything "negative" again. She congratulated me when I met my goal and understands why I have moved it to 125 from the 120 I had.

Day 4 Entry

4. What are (or were) your fears about weight loss?

Oh gosh, did I fear almost everything when I started out. First off I was afraid of failure. Then I was afraid of exercise since I was in a power chair. I was so happy I found Spark People site. I learned so much about foods and not having to do away with anything, just watch how much of some things that I eat. I have always believed that too much of anything isn't good for a person. I had already cut the amount of meat I eat, so that was never a problem or a worry. It would seem when i would eat meats, especially red meats, i felt very sluggish to the point of nearly passing out. I kept reading and learning here. I could hardly believe that all this was free for members!

OK, that took care of the food part of my fears. The next part was huge! I mentioned in one of my teams about not getting exercise because of being in my chair. One of the members sent me a message telling me I should check out the chair exercise team. I did and wow! That made a total difference in my life. There was so much info on the team page along with reviews of chair DVD's and books. And the leaders! Anytime I messaged one of them I got a quick response with the info I requested and needed. I have been doing so well that lately I barely use my chair or my walker. If we are going out, I usually take my cane if I have to. The last fall I had was over two months ago when I twisted my ankle and couldn't stop myself.
So quite quickly I lost my fears, but never took my journey for granted. I understood that I could easily go back to bad habits. One time a friend had chips and dip out for snacks. She totally forgot until she saw me that I didn't "do" that sort of thing anymore. Well, since I had learned so much about proper portions (which was one of my most difficult lessons), I do have treats every so often. So she and I went into the kitchen. She took out her extra bag of chips. I counted out 6 of them and found out was in the dip. She had made it with all low fat ingredients and no extra salt. So, I took about 2 teaspoons. All of that help ease my fears, too.

Because all of those things happened while I was going on my journey, I feel very comfortable now that I have reached goal and on maintenance. I can't picture myself being any other way after 2 years of the program. Even going thru my treatments, I managed to do leg lifts everyday and light hand weights on my right. The left side is where they took the lymph nodes and I could not do them on that side for a long time. It can still be sore sometimes now. When it is, I adjust the exercises I do that day.

All and all, my journey has been helped by Spark and the support and encouragement I received. All the wonderful information was so helpful. I think I have saved almost every article there is!! lol!! But my fears are all gone.

Everyone take care of yourselves. I know y'all make the best choices you can.

Peace, love, and happiness to all my Buds. i love each one of you.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Thank you for sharing your fears and for being such an inspiration!

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/5/2012 2:39AM

    You are amazing .I love reading your blogs they always address something interesting to me.Thank you!

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JINLYNN 9/5/2012 12:00AM

    emoticon emoticon
you are doing such an awesome job in your journey. I enjoyed your blog and I thank you for being brave enough to share your fears with us.
Best wishes as you continue your journey!

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1CRAZYDOG 9/4/2012 8:46PM

    Yours is the 2nd blog I've read about fears! Interesting. My big fear is much like yours. I have been on program since Feb. 2010 and it's been a miracle in my life. I have been in maintenance and my biggest fear is that I'll gain that weight back -- because that's what I've done in the past! But not now! It's all about lifestyle vs. diet for me. I know there are some things I just cannot hae, but that's alright! There is so much I CAN have and that's what I concentrate on.

I'm the same way with red meat. I literally feel that tired feeling wash over me. So, not much for me in the way of red meat. That's alright.

Hope this finds you feeling comfortable.


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KARIDIAN1 9/4/2012 8:09PM

    I had now fears about losing the weight, just how was I going to do it.

Thanks goodness for SP!

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1STATEOFDENIAL 9/4/2012 6:56PM

    Knowledge is a great motivator and information is a great way to quelch fear.

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Day 2 Blog Entry

Monday, September 03, 2012

Q. How did you pick your goal weight? Did you pick an ultimate goal weight at the beginning of your weight loss? Did it change? Did you set smaller goals along the way?

I picked my goal weight at first to be under 200 pounds. I really wanted to lose more but getting a healthy life style was my main goal. i figured the weight loss to be the extra reward for that.

Yes, my goal changed several times. After the first 65 pounds, I made the next one for 30 more pounds. After that, I worked with 20 pound numbers. I never put a date to my goals. My thought on that was when I get there I get there. If my better eating and increased exercise doesn't give me more weight off, so be it. Then I made every one. I rewarded myself when I lost the 65 and when I achieved
a healthy BMI for my height and weight. Increasing my goal is on the advice of my oncologist. He thinks I am too light and wants me to gain with more good protein and good fats. I have increased my calorie goals for each day to try to accomplish what he wishes. I want to feel good and to be the best me than I can. And I do feel good.

Happiness has been with me for quite a while now. I have also enjoyed not having to shop in the plus sizes anymore, too. The first time I went to get new clothes, I couldn't believe I had lost so many inches!! I knew the weight came off, but I didn't think much beyond most of my pants were too big for me. When I tried jeans on, I started with a size 18. It was obvious i needed to go down. I ended up with a 10. The next ones were 6! I even have one pair of 4's!! It is great being in single digit sizes. All of my bras became way too big, too. I went from a 50DD to a 36B/C. Again, I was amazed by that. My first bra when I was in 5th grade and 9 years old was a 34B! But the feeling much better and not having to use my chair very much anymore have been the biggest things for me.

The encouragement hand support that my Spark friends have given me, helped to spur me on to get healthy and by doing so, losing the weight. For that i am so very grateful. I love each and every one.

Peace, love, and hope.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JENNYR0506 9/4/2012 5:07PM

    So glad you are joining us on the 30 Day Blog Challenge. I'm also glad to hear you are gaining weight by eating healthy proteins and fats. Good for you.


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LADYPIXEL 9/4/2012 11:54AM

    You have done amazingly well, and you should be incredibly proud of your success... doing this without the complications is not easy, and with them it's verging on the impossible. So you can truly believe you've done the impossible!

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/4/2012 12:14AM

    I wanted to be able to move better it was a catch 22 for me the cortisone shots have made me move more easily and the weight is coming off all in all I feel better I hope it lasts they say I can get three shots into the joint a year ,

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Q8PRINCESS 9/4/2012 12:08AM

    I'm trying to get to the healthy range about 22.5 BMI.

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CO-CREATOR 9/3/2012 9:50PM

    Wow, you have done so well, I am so happy for you! I look forward to the day I don't have to shop in the plus sizes anymore. They just aren't very stylish.

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KARIDIAN1 9/3/2012 9:01PM

    My doctor suggested 170 as a goal, and I would like to hit 150, which my doctor would be thrilled with. I got close, down to 163 and then have faltered and gained some weight back. Summer just got in the way with shooting and eating on the run too much.

Congrats on your fantastic weight loss.

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EBEAMS 9/3/2012 8:24PM


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MARILYNS66 9/3/2012 6:10PM

    You truly inspire me - you have done so well. And you are dealing with cancer? You are quite the lady - so positive.

I too have dealt with cancer - 2000 I was operated on and then in 2003 need radiation as one cancer cell reappeared. Clear since then - thank the Lord

As for weight loss goals - I have a lot to lose and in the past always looked to the final number - needless to say I got discouraged very fast. Now I am going in small numbers. At present I am looking to lose 3 pounds to meet my next goal and then it will be 4 pounds to get into the next 10 digit number

Keep blogging and posting - it inspires me to keep me going on my journey

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JINLYNN 9/3/2012 5:40PM

    emoticon emoticon on your program

When I started I did not set a goal weight - that just seemed too far away. So instead I decided to focus on just losing 10% of my starting weight. It took me 3 1/2 years, but I made it to that goal a couple of weigh ins ago. Now I have a goal weight in mind, but I will reach it by focusing on the 10% weight loss targets.

I hope all goes well with your reaching your new goal.

Comment edited on: 9/3/2012 5:41:10 PM

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COACHPENNY 9/3/2012 5:39PM

    At first, I put down a goal weight that was reasonable (130) but, in my case unattainable (all at once). I needed to get it down to smaller increments. And I need to focus on the day to day successes and not get bogged down by a busy life. So now I am sticking with losing twenty pounds. Once way or another, it's time.

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30 Day Blog Challenge on Healthy Lifestyle- Day 1

Monday, September 03, 2012

1: Your stats. Starting stats, current stats, goal stats. Are you currently trying to lose weight, gain weight, or maintain weight or something else? Do you have a goal for the month of September?

Starting weight: 245
Weight as of Friday August 31 - 117
I have changed my goal weight from 120 to 125
I am trying to gain weight by eating more good protein and good fat
My goal for September is try to get closer to my goal weight.

Those who follow my blog already know of my struggle on my goal weight. I am trying to do as close as I can to my oncologist's weight he would like to see at the end of September.

When I started this journey seriously, I made my first goal at -65 pounds. That put me under 200 pounds for the first time in over 20 years. When i made it, I reset my goal for -30 pounds. After reaching that one, the next ones were in -20 pound intervals until i reached 120. I chose that number because I had been at 123 when I was married at nineteen to my first husband. As soon as he left for Viet Nam, i started emotional eating. It got worse from that point forward. There were some health issue that wasn't found for 20 years. Once that was taken care of, I stopped all emotional eating and got to 140. Then my father died on my 30th birthday, and the emotional eating started once more.

Needless to say I've been up and down over the years with the emotional eating coming into play along with different health issues, becoming smoke free, and simply not caring what into my mouth.

Hopefully I'll be able to get to that 125 easily. But, no more emotional eating for over 20 years.

My driver's license picture from 1991 when I moved to FL. I was at 185.

My picture on 4th of July, several months before my dad passed away. I was at 130.

My graduation picture the summer of 1963. I was at 127.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JOYCECAIN 9/12/2012 1:49PM

    Your pictures are lovely.I get upset I eat also. Our refrigerators can be our best friend. They don't yell, they open their arms to us, inviting us to come in and we can do or have anything we want. You take care of yourself. You are looking and doing great.

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PMFISH 9/7/2012 8:38AM

    Thanks for sharing your pictures! They are lovely. I found some good fats in pistachios, avocados and coconut oil. Don't know if you can eat any of those, but if you can you might want to try.

I went on a weight gain program when they put me on chemo. I had banana and peanut butter protein shakes with ice cream. It was hard for me to keep anything down, but those worked.

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CO-CREATOR 9/3/2012 9:53PM

    I am enjoying reading your entries from the blog challenge. Where are the questions coming from?

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KARIDIAN1 9/3/2012 9:05PM

Great photos. I was right around 100 when I got married in 1976. When I stopped riding horses, then slowly the weight came on since i wasn't as active.

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JINLYNN 9/3/2012 5:36PM


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THRIVE2DAY 9/3/2012 4:31PM

    emoticon emoticon

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MOM2ACAT 9/3/2012 2:59PM


I love your pictures!

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LOSTLIME 9/3/2012 2:30PM

    emoticon emoticon

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MUSOLF6 9/3/2012 2:21PM


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SWDESERTLOVER 9/3/2012 12:26PM

    Good luck to you on gaining and then maintaining your weight. Also, thanks for sharing the pictures. I know that must bring back so many memories for you. I'm working on losing weight and am down 13 pounds since I started a little over a month ago - trying to earn the kayak that I already bought. My goal is to be down 20 pounds by my birthday the end of this month, so I have 7 more to go. If I get close to that I'll be happy.

Hope you're having a great day!

Cindy emoticon emoticon

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COACHPENNY 9/3/2012 12:18PM

    Right now, I hover between 180 and 183. Not too happy with that which is up from what I lost before. I had been down to 170 at one point. My current goal is to lose 20 pounds.

Being a team leader is not my forte but, I have decided to give it another try SO..................I also have challenged myself and my fellow team members on the I WANT TO BE A LOSER team to walk 30 minutes a day...any way we can Starting Tuesday September 4th and continuing this goal ALL MONTH.


You are one of my great motivators, Ev!

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Some September Goals

Saturday, September 01, 2012

Here are some of my goals for this month. This will be a relative short entry compared to what I usually do.

For Spark People:

1. Change my target weight from 120 to 125.
2. Change the number of daily calories from 1200 to 1600; to 1600 to 2000
3. Try to visit more teams each day and huddle and answer on one thread.
4. Try to visit more of friends each day and comment or give them goodies.
5. Try to answer my mail better than I have.
6. Try to blog more and get some thoughts and topics in order.

In General:

1. Write at least an hour a day.
2. Journal at least 5 times a week and in my grateful journal daily. Make it 3 things each day rather than the 5 I have been doing.
3. Try to compliment everyone when I meet them for the day.
4. Get caught up with my laundry.
5. Work harder to follow my doctors' orders.
6. SMILE!!!! As Mother Theresa said, we never know the good that will happen from a single smile.

Do any of you have goals for each month or for the year? Do you try to keep them realistic so you will succeed rather than set yourself up for failure? What are your thoughts? As with most of my blogs, I'm really interested in what you have to say.

Peace, love, hope to all my Spark Buds. I love each of you very much.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HIKETOHEIGHTS 9/3/2012 11:03PM

    I like quite a few of these, I am working on my list still.

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JINLYNN 9/3/2012 5:33PM

    Good goals to start the new season with. I will be looking forward to hearing how you are doing as the month/season progresses!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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KARIDIAN1 9/2/2012 9:40PM

    Good goals for the month of September.

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    Thank you for sharing your goals with us. I realise now that it is so important to recheck your goals and make sure they are still what you want from all of your effort to help you achieve all you want from life.

There are so many of your goals that I would like to adopt as my own - thank you so much for making me think, and all the best on your SP journey!


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MOM2ACAT 9/2/2012 2:46PM

    I don't write down my goals either, but I have an idea in my head what I want to do. It's hard when my health changes from day to day all time, because of being on the chemo.

One goal I have this month is to walk in the Survivor Lap at the Relay for Life on the 15th.

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WHERERMY62KEYS 9/2/2012 11:26AM

  food for thought

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LOSTLIME 9/2/2012 8:41AM

    Very nice list! I need to do a lot of those things. I am going to sit down and
look at my goals and issues that I want to work on. Thank you for the
reminder . Have a great day!

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Q8PRINCESS 9/2/2012 1:35AM

    Great list!

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FLEMIDG 9/2/2012 12:53AM

    Good for you for setting some goals for yourself. It is a great idea. I have always thought about what I would like to do, but I have never actually set goals as to how I am going to do it. I would love to start journalling. I just need to actually do something about it. Congratulations on making a plan. You can do it. Good luck with your healthy lifestyle challenge.


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1STATEOFDENIAL 9/2/2012 12:29AM

    I think you have a wonderful, wide range of goals to focus on. I'm glad you're adjusting your goal weight and calories slightly - you heard what the doctor said and what your sparkfriends said then chose what you feel is right. That's what we all need to do.

As for me, I'm not good at coming up with goals. Part of the problem is I never know in any day how I'll be feeling, and sometimes I lose an entire week to my health conditions. I tend to be a perfectionist towards myself, so when I mess up I end up beating myself up over it, then stop working so hard because I'll mess up again. I'm working on this, but in the meantime I've not been making much for goals. Instead I work on projects and try to remind myself whenever possible that I need to work on them.

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HICKOK-HALEY 9/2/2012 12:19AM

    I don't write down my goals. I have been thinking of writing in a journal though. I am so bad when it come to writing, and I always have been. You have given me food for thought!

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MARILYNS66 9/2/2012 12:02AM

    Love your goals - very realistic ones

I do make them but haven't been posting monthly goals as such but rather have broken it down into daily goals.

As it is the beginning of the month think with my next blogg I will put down my goals for the month

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