Thursday, January 21, 2010
this is month is terrible as far as bday's and eating bad food goes. december is easier for me to get through than january. my birthday, my bff's son's bday, my mil's bday and my sil's bday. sheesh! so every weekend there is a party or dinner event to attend. my birthday is monday and my party is saturday. so i've decided to take this week off. off as in, not tracking everything and not stressing over what i do end up eating this weekend. i know myself and i know if i am trying to keep track of everything i eat, yet keep saturday in mind and try to be cautious cause of it, i'll eat anything and everything! so far i've made smart choices. i know what i should and shouldn't be eating. i'm getting good at recognizing portions sizes. i've done real well so far!
my biggest fear when i'm really keeping track of everything i eat is when i run into something i can't get info on. like restraunt food. only major chains have online info. it scares the crap out of me to not be able to accurately record what i'm eating. i feel an anxiety attack coming on. with this in mind, i decided to record nothing and see how i do. i have a psuedo healthy dinner planned for my birthday (monday): homemade pulled pork sandwhiches and homemade fries. i just have to get through this weekend and next. then i'll be done and can avoid restraunts til march! i'll get back to tracking next week though. but i'm curious to see how my weigh in monday goes. up, down, the same...i'm totally freaked! it's helping me to stay in line and i hope i can keep this cautious feeling going all weekend.
Monday, January 11, 2010
i gave up soda for my 2009 new year's resolution. i had my first rum and diet dr. pepper at 12:01 am january 1. then i had another january 2 cause the other one wasn't as enjoyable due to the alcohol i had consumed prior. those were enjoyable drinks. it's my favorite drink and i had missed it over the year. but i hadn't missed soda. before that year i would drink almost a liter a day. i knew it was doing things to me, but i didn't really know what. i decided in december of '09 i would drink a liter of soda at some point in january to see what it did.
the only concrete conclusion i had come to over the year was my headaches were gone. i would get bad headaches that would leave me darn near immobile for a day. i couldn't do anything but rub my head. they weren't constant, but they were annoying. last year i suddenly realized i wasn't getting them anymore. i rarely got headaches at all! just from allergies and stiff necks. wow! soda was causing my headaches.
going into this test i had a fear my somewhat addiction would come back. i feared my headaches would start again. but i needed to know what i was doing to myself so i could stop. yesterday i decided to give my body the test. i already knew the caffiene would freak me out. i've barely had any over the year. i went to the store and bought a liter of my old friend diet dr. pepper. i came home, poured it in a glass with some ice. and savored the wonderful dr. pepper taste. i sat down on the couch to listen to my body. first thing i noticed was my drunk-like chattering. some weird hyperness took over me. i had the munchies almost instantly. as i made my way through the bottle my stomache started to burn. not in a heart burn sort of way, more in the way your throat burns when the bubbles go down. i recognized this feeling! i had it almost daily in my soda days. then i realized as my tummy got more full of soda i had this hollow, empty feeling in it. like i could actually feel my stomache and knew it was empty. but it wasn't! it had soda and chips in it! i knew if i had been doing this mindlessly i would have found more food to eat. as i went through glass after glass i wanted more. even when it was gone i wanted more! this scared me! i didn't want it to turn into an addiction again. so i drank some carbonated water and tons of cold tap water. this seemed to help. then i ate dinner. my cravings were gone but my body was still feeling the effects. it was 8 o'clock, i should have been winding down. but my body was still feeling the buzz from caffiene. and whatever else was making it feel funny. chemicals, no doubt. i went to bed about 9:30, not cause i was tired, but because i feared i would never sleep. i was in bed with this weird awake and tired at the same time feeling. my body was tired, but my mind was not. luckily my body won over and i fell asleep without too much tossing and turning.
this was a great learning experience. i recognized all the feelings, physically and emotionally that the soda brought on. i had felt them all before. back then they seemed normal. yesterday they were foreign and slightly freaky. i can't believe i was doing that to myself all that time! i woke with a clear mind this morning and realized i wouldn't have an addiction problem of any sort. i was able to easily give it up last january and have no fear that staying away in the future will be a problem any time soon.
as a side note, i only drank diet soda. but diet dr. pepper was my first choice. so i thought it would be a great subject for this test. i'm sure the results would have been the same regardless of the soda i used.
i did not drop a significant amout of weight giving up soda. i only drank diet versions. i did however lose water weight/bloating, whatever you want to call it. and i snacked a whole lot less. that empty feeling i mentioned above was surely the cause of the snacking!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
i've made it! every day! woo-hoo! i even got out of bed early on christmas day to get it done. my focus is now on not skipping new year's day. even if i'm hungover, i will complete the workout!
tomorrow will be my last day on the level 1. i'm nervous and excited about what is waiting for me in level 2. i'm doing pretty well with level 1, some days better than others. i can almost always complete the cardio portion without wanting to collapse. my lunges and squats are getting lower and i can even do a few sit ups.
my goal for the end of the 30 days is to be able to do a real push up and use my 5 lb weights for all the strength. right now i'm swithching between those and the 2 lb. and of course, to complete it in 30 consecutive days. so far so good!
i'm currently reading "the amazing adventures of dietgirl". what an awesome book! i read about it here on one of the daily blogs and reserved it from my library. i finally got it last week. it's so inspiring. and though dietgirl is a lot larger than me (she was 351 when she started her journey) i can totally relate to what she is going through and how she lives her life. if you haven't read this, i strongly recommend it.
tonight i'm picking up the biggest loser 30 day weightloss, or whatever, from the library. i have already read the book and decided i would work on this challenge in january. i'm going to start it sunday the 3. the 1st is not going to work cause i have a big family dinner. and a birthday party the 2nd. alcohol is going to be eliminated for the majority, so why set myself up to fail the first day?
speaking of alcohol, my b-day is jan 25. my mom- in-law is jan 18 and my sis-in-law is jan 26. lots of reasons to drink in jan. so, if the occasion arises, i'm going to allow myself beverages on those 3 occasions. plus we're going out to eat and i don't think that's included in the bl 30 day thing. hopefully by then i'll be in a rhythym and be able to behave myself and make smart choices.
i was hoping to be able to do "the spark" stuff in jan. but i won't even get the book til freaking jan 15th, or so. wth?! i preordered it from amazon and it said it would be released jan 4. now sp is saying today. wth? so i tried to cancel my preorder and amazon said i couldn't. and it will be arriving between the 11th and the 15th. i'm so annoyed! so i'll do the bl thing and study "the spark" until i'm done with that.
i'm going to complete my new year's goals this week then i'll share them with you all.
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