Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Well, it was bound to happen eventually. I mean, I know weight tends to bounce around on a daily basis - the important thing is that it's one step back and TWO steps forward as the general trend.
Still, a 2 1/2 pound gain is frustrating.
I have a few theories as to why it happened. First of all, for those who skipped the last blog, let's just say it's *that* time of the month, and that can affect things. But I think the bigger issue is the fact that I didn't make it to the gym this weekend, and the one day I shredded it was rushed (I didn't get up early enough complete it and be ready for work on time). Saturday I really have no excuse - I totally could have gone to the gym before my mate woke up, but I knew we were going to the Ren Faire and I didn't want to slow us done once he DID wake up (I didn't want him to have to wait on me) - AND I was internetting and got sucked in. *sigh* I need to make sure I'm spending my time wisely and being intentional about things, and not just get caught up and forget my priorities. Sunday was because of sleep - I'd been up 24 hours, and in that case sleep really needed to come before exercise. One or the other wouldn't have been a big deal, but both together are a problem. I did a kick ass workout on Tuesday (as mentioned on the prior blog), but it wasn't enough to make up for essentially missing 3 days. Add to that the fact that I've had more pasta-based meals than usual this week (a sign I've been stressed out, because pasta is my go-to comfort food), and I suspect I didn't watch my portions as carefully as I should have BECAUSE I've been stressed out (the ex/kid-housing situation really had me tied up in knots, and I'm suspecting PMS didn't help on that score). All of which together - no surprise here - adds up to a gain instead of a loss.
Where do I go from here?
Keep on keeping on I suppose. This week is going to be tough on the exercise front since we're going out of town, and I won't have my gym routine to fall back on. I'm going to have to MAKE time to exercise and I'm going to have to MAKE opportunities. To that end, my mate is bringing the laptop so I can use work out DVDs, and I also spent some time mapping out walking/running routes yesterday (and verified that YES there are sidewalks in the area - I couldn't remember seeing any when we've been there before and neither could 'Yote). Now it's just a matter of making sure it happens NO MATTER WHAT. I'm pretty sure I'm all set on the food front - I've got a roast in the crockpot right now that we'll eat before we leave (avoiding the usual on-the-road-McDonalds-stop), and since there's a fridge and microwave in the hotel room I'm taking fruit and cottage cheese with me, as well as my 100 calorie Almond packs to have for snacking while we're at the convention. If memory serves from last year, the restaurant in the hotel has plenty of healthy options for "meal", and between my phone and the laptop I'll be able to track as I go. So I'm not worried about eating - I think I've got that part set. It's just the exercise that's going to be the challenge.
SO, today before we leave, I'm hitting the gym like gangbusters. Hopefully I'll be able to do that again both Monday *and* Tuesday next week (but Monday will depend on how tired I am after being up all day, driving 4 hours home and working all night).
I'll admit that I'm grappling with guilt - although it's not the usual "I suck" kind of guilt, more of a feeling of having let my Wisteria Wolves BLC14 team down. I should have had better numbers for the Weekend Exercise Challenge. I should have had a loss, not a gain. BUT...things happen. We maneuver according to circumstances, and move on from here. It's frustrating, but it simply serves to remind me that cutting corners doesn't do me any favors. I need to come up with better strategies to stay on track when I'm stressed, during my monthly cycle, and I need back up plans for my back up plans so I don't de-rail myself.
First order of business? Get through this week.
After that, we'll see how the weigh in goes next week, and decide what needs tweaking and what needs to be more consistent.
One step back, two steps forward.
I CAN do this!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Okay kids - if you're particularly squeamish or don't like reading about female bodily functions...you probably want to skip this one.
No really...I'm not kidding.
This is your last chance...you can still bail...
Still here? Okaaaaaaaay...if you're sure...
So I started my period Sunday morning (told you, female bodily functions, you stayed, so deal). For me (and I know all women are different) the first 24-48 hours are the worst, and I know pretty quickly whether it's going to be an easy month or an ugly month. Since I got active on Spark again, I've been lucky and had mostly easy months since May. Apparently this month Mother Nature decided she'd been nice long enough, and though it started out slow...by the time I got up for work Sunday night we were in full blown abattoir mode (did I mention TMI?). Ew. Didn't slow my mate down when we got home from work Monday (never does - yet another testament to what a prince of a guy he is, he is universally FAR less grossed out by anything my body does than I ever am), which was actually the source of some merriment (and gallows humor...something along the lines of "This is what the teabaggers think BDSM looks like ALL the time").
Now NORMALLY, by the second day for me things are settling down somewhat. It was still relatively heavy when I first woke up Monday night, but seemed to be lessening as the day wore on. And having missed the gym all weekend, I was DETERMINED to go to Zumba after work. So at 8am I changed into my work out clothes and changed to fresh pad, and we were off to the gym.
I could just hear my innards chastising me as we got past the warm up and started bouncing around in earnest - "Really? REALLY? What about this actually sounded like a good idea?!?" But our stalwart zumba enthusiast not only continued on, but even added a little more bounce to some of the steps she usually does "low" (low = less impact for those of us who aren't skinny little hip hop artists). Defiance? Stupidity? Guilt for not going to the gym for 3 days and trying to make up for it? Maybe. My body didn't care what the motivation was, it WASN'T amused or happy about the situation. With about 15 minutes to go, I had that lovely feeling (you ladies know what I'm talking about) that made me go "Uh oh...um...hmmm...perhaps I should take a break and head to the bathroom for a sec...", but then another favorite song came on and I decided to tough it out for those last 15 minutes. Even took a sec to ask the instructor after class about the name of said favorite song that I keep waking up with stuck in my head (it's called "I Like It" by Enrique Eglasias). THEN I want to the bathroom.
Can we say hemorrhage?
So yeah. MAYbe not the best move on my part.
Happily I recently found some pads that REALLY work for me, and I didn't need to change clothes or anything. Good thing, because I didn't have any more pads with me anyway, and then it was time to walk home.
The GOOD part? I expect this means I may be done with this month's installment a little faster than usual (I mean really, how much more can be IN there?), which I'm ALL kinds of good with since we're going out of town AND will be celebrating my mate's birthday in a hotel this weekend. On white sheets (as opposed to our red flannel at home - talk about foresight, I just broke those out last week).
But still. Lesson learned - next time, if Zumba class is scheduled within the first 48 hours after my period starts, I MAY just wanna skip it, and wait a couple of days. Just a thought.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
We have these HUGE mirrors in the lady's room at work, that cover the entire wall behind the sinks. Last night I happened to catch a glimpse of myself, and realized something I hadn't noticed before.
I was wearing a t-shirt and jeans ('cause it was a holiday, and on 3rd shift nobody cares anyway, but I usually dress "business casual" most days unless it's a holiday) - in fact the t-shirt I got last year at the same convention we're going to this weekend. And I realized that the t-shirt wasn't tight. I mean. ALL t-shirts are tight across the chest - it's how I'm built. But I'm used to seeing a bulge around my middle - even though I buy 2X sizes, they're usually a bit snug. I NEVER tuck shirts into my pants at this size, 'cause the bulge just looks worse that way.
The shirt was hanging straight down over the jeans. No bulge. I mean, I knew there was a bulge UNDER there (these are the smaller size jeans, and they're still a little tight - not exactly a "muffin top", but they're definitely not loose)...but you couldn't see it. At all. *blink blink*
I pointed this out to my boyfriend when I got home, and he said "Well yeah...", and then wrapped his arms around my middle and held me tight for a minute smiling down at me. "You know, I bet there are a LOT more of my shirts that would fit you now if you wanted to wear them." (He usually buys 2X shirts - not that he needs to, but he likes his shirts loose and comfy - I rarely wear them though because I've always been afraid I'd stretch them out. And seriously - dude has some AWESOME t-shirts). "In fact, I bet the 'I Hot Moms' shirt would be incredibly cute on you"
This could get fun!
In other news, having noticed in the last week or so how my cardio endurance has improved, I'm considering starting up C25K again. Partially because THIS looks like incredible fun!
You know, that prize for the costume contest would totally get us to Seattle (which is on the agenda for this year at some point so we can visit MIMERKI - not that I don't know she'll be at our Handfasting in May, but still). Hmmmmmm...
Go go creative juices!
Monday, October 11, 2010
So I've been sitting here bored out of my mind (holidays are SLOW), avoiding doing documentation work (as always...GODS it's tedious, we hatez it we does), feeling crummy 'cause this month Mother Nature has decided to get me back for the past several *easy* months (or possibly it's just my body's way of kicking my sorry arse 'cause I didn't make it to the gym all weekend), wishing I had something interesting to blog about and coming up empty...
While my food was heating up I decided to check e-mail on my phone. What do I find waiting for me? A note from my son telling me they've pulled out the Hail Mary pass, and have a reprieve for a month.
At that moment, I didn't care that I was at work and anybody could have come up...the tears just happened. It's hard to describe how tied up in knots I've been over their situation this week - I panicked yesterday when nobody answered their phone and my daughter's cell phone was disconnected. Happily it occurred to me after a few minutes that with any luck DANCINGRAVEYNS might be with the crew and I texted her, and burst into tears when she texted they were at Grandma's, and they were just visiting (no, power was still on, just visiting). So THIS news? Yep, it undid me. Yeah, I'm sure the hormones aren't helping, but still...I love my kids and I love their dad (remember, I stay friends with exes - just 'cause I'm not married to him doesn't mean I don't CARE) and I HATE not being able to do anything to help.
So apparently the universe was listening to all your prayers and good thoughts, and decided to cut them a break. Here's hoping it's enough - the boys (dad included) all still need jobs or it'll just be staving disaster off for a month and we'll be right back here again. So if you wouldn't mind keeping those prayers and good thoughts coming...if it worked once, it can work again, right? I know they're doing their part (that being busting their butts putting in applications all over creation) - it's only a matter of time and SOMETHING has to turn up.
Saturday, October 09, 2010
It felt weird going as a "civilian" - but I gave back the last of my borrowed garb a few months ago, and haven't picked up anything new just yet (I figure we'll wait on that kind of expense until we've gotten a little further along on the weight loss).
I will have you know I wasn't even tempted by the funnel cakes! That's a major victory right there. We ate lunch before we headed out, and only picked up some extra water for me and a Pepsi for my mate. Though I'll admit...I was sorely tempted by the puppets (I am SUCH a puppet geek). My mate has their card in his wallet now, so I suspect there may be more puppets in my future (he got me the gryphon I'd been lusting after for Yule 2 years ago). :D
The only intentional "person" photo - this is Kenny Klein, a pagan musician we know from the festival we attended in July - the fact that he was at the Ohio Ren Faire this weekend and next weekend was one of the main reasons we decided to go (next weekend we'll be out of town).
We just caught the very end of his set, and then ended up hanging out with him at the Pub for the next hour or so just talking. It was definitely worth the drive!
Other things seen around the Faire!
Yes, she's dancing with a glass of beer (meade? Ale? something alcoholic) on her head. Yes, I'm impressed. And Mr. Goodboyfriend Handbook, when I pointed out that someday I'll be able to do that too, commented that I've got a lot more to shimmy than those dancers did (with a big ol' grin on his face). I think I'll keep him. :D
So yeah, we had a lovely day at the faire. Followed by a lovely evening listening to our favorite band's new album (which was streaming just yesterday and today online for those who'd donated to the project - the album comes out on 1/11/11, and from what we heard tonight it is AWESOME). Gods I SO wish I didn't have to go to work tonight. *sigh*
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