Saturday, January 01, 2011
Stewart's Orange 'n' Cream soda. How can this stuff possibly taste this good?
I have developed a theory that it is alien technology. That's what they are keeping so well guarded in Area 51. They greys that arrived with their ill-fated spacecraft in Roswell in 1947 had a cooler full of Orange 'n' Cream between the pilot's seats.
Wait, you say, that was 64 years ago. Stewart's hasn't been around that long. Ah, but they have. Stewart's root beer stand opened in 1924. They simply began bottling beverages in 1990. So, the root beer stand was already in operation 23 years before the Roswell incident! They have obviously had their eye on the formula since then.
Unfortunately for them, and the world at large, the reverse-engineering necessary to create the heavenly taste on earth took a good 48 years, being released to the public in 1995. How they smuggled it out of Area 51 from under the government's nose in the first place is still a mystery.
Who knows what effect the introduction of this alien taste technology will eventually have on the human race... I, for one, believe that it will elevate our brain functions to allow for future interstellar travel. And who knows what new cosmic flavor delights humans will find in their journeys? The possibilities are endless.
Oh, yeah... and I think there may be crack in it too.