Wednesday, June 01, 2011
Wow, what a month May was. Full of ups and downs, mainly downs, but I survived and I am so happy that June is finally here!!!
I was super sick last week, and then when I finally got my appetite back, I also got my period again. Nice! I spent 3 days over Friday, Saturday, and Sunday eating too much food. It sure didn't help that I went to a family gathering and a graduation party hungry and with no plans on eating well.
Then, yesterday and the day before I felt horrible. Yes, I had been eating unhealthy, but my stomach was feeling like when I was sick but with a horrible pain that doubled me over. Yesterday was the day I faced the music about my eating and my weight, and my husband and I vowed to eat better and be more active again.
I had a good cereal, which I couldn't eat half of because my stomach hurt SO much. I cut up some watermelon for a snack when I finally got my appetite back 4 hours later, and each time I ate a piece of watermelon my stomach ached in a deep burning pain. I couldn't eat again until dinner when I finally felt hungry again, which was around 6:30. It didn't hurt too much, but the pain was still there.
Earlier yesterday, I did go in, and they feel that my stomach flu last week wasn't the flu but a flare-up of a peptic ulcer that I may have. They had me do the breath test for H. pylori, a bacteria that causes ulcers.
I am so hoping that this is something that can be healed soon. I am so, so tired and I am so unhappy. I have not felt like myself for about 2 weeks now, and I hate it. I have felt defeated and weak. So tired, and no amount of sleep can make me feel rested. I haven't been to the gym since this all happened, because the thought of my stomach being jiggled around makes me wanna throw up.
Also, between being sick and getting down to 154 after being seriously dehydrate during all that, and now after eating so much/so bad and now being up to 164 again where I originally was before this started, I am feeling again very defeated. I am seeing light at the end of the tunnel and I know I can lose these 4 pounds, but I know physically I have a lot of work to do. I feel like I have lost a lot of muscle mass. I haven't run in a LONG time. I am running today with my husband in a couch to 5k interval for National Running Day, which is exciting to me, and I hope my stomach can handle it.
I know I need to just track my food, but it has been so hard to do that when my eating habits have been so dictated by my stomach. And when it is finally feeling good, I feel SO ravenous and like I have a hollow leg that the food just drops through.
I am thinking about signing up for a half either in August or September, maybe October so I have that as a fitness goal, but a part of me is nervous about doing that since I still feel dejected about the last race that I couldn't run because of what seemed like 100 excuses. I feel like a fraud wearing that shirt because I didn't run it. But, I wanted SOMETHING for the $100 I spent.
I guess I am having a lot of negative thoughts this morning. Could be in part, too, because my little girl woke up early on my morning to get up with her, I slammed my thumb in the door, and my stomach just feels pitchy.
I just want to feel like myself again....
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
A quick update since I am supposed to be working...
I am now finally on the mend. Not much energy back yet but that is mainly because I haven't been able to eat much. Today was my weigh in, so I had to put it in. yes, I've lost 10 pounds in 3 days, but I doubt that will last! I actually want to gain back at least a few of those pounds in muscle, and I know that once I am hydrated I will gain a few too.
I will be staying away from the gym for a few more days since I am still pretty weak, and I don't want to push it.
As for the contest, I am not sure how to go about it. I obviously lost a lot of weight but for a very crappy reason, and hubby unfortunately ate out a lot because I wasn't cooking. I weighed 154 this morning and he weighed 186. I feel like we should both "win" since it was such a stressful week for us both.
Well...just wanted to show that I am still here!
Friday, May 20, 2011
The Fargo 5K.....didn't happen for me. The weather was the worst it possibly could be for my eyes. The wind was gusting 15-20+ MPH and the weather was forecasting rain. It was drizzling while I was at the Expo, and I just couldn't be sure that it wouldn't pour while running the 5K, so again a decision had to be made, and again my eyes won out. If this was a week from now I would have run it, but I had to make the right decision. I still picked up my packets, because even though I didn't run them, I still felt like I had put in a lot of work (and money) towards these 2 races, and I wanted at least the shirts from them since I wouldn't be getting the bling
Wow, the expo was busy, but not surprising since it was only an hour or so before the beginning of the 5K. I ran into a few people I knew, and ultimately met up with RDARLING before leaving. She is one of those people who is even more pretty and vibrant in person, and I absolutely fell in love with her shoes at first sight, along with her fuel belt (w/o water). I definitely would love to run a half or other race in the future with her!
We ended up leaving before the 5K started, and went to the West Acres Mall. My daughter unfortunately was very tired because of the 1+ hour drive and she was very constipated (TMI, sorry) and so she was just overall irritable. Well, after changing her diaper and going to the food court, she freaked out because she wanted to go in a high chair that she saw, and we walked right by it. Corey (my DH, not so dear at this time) pretty much blew up. He was tired and crabby from the whole day (he's a teacher and it was his last day of school). I pretty much let him go off to get his own meal and stew on his own. I knew I could and would do one of two things: Use this frustration and anger and eat something really bad for me and a danged big portion of it, or work through it and split a 6-inch turkey and ham sub with Kaylee. Guess which one I did??? You bet. I split the 6-inch with Kaylee. Another reason I made that choice is because I had 2 slices of Pizza Hut (supreme) pizza and a small piece of cake at my workplace's celebration for Medical Transcription Week. And get this??? I still stayed in my calories!!!!! I ended the day at about 1400 calories :o}
So, this morning, we weighed in, and here is where we are sitting at:
Me: Needs to hit 160 to win. Current weight: 161.8 pounds.
DH: Needs to hit 180 to win. Current weight: 184.4 pounds.
So, I only need to lose another 1.8 to win, while he's sitting at 4.4 pounds left to lose. And that Taco Bell dinner he had tonight isn't going to help....
Well, just had to update, and though I feel like I let a few people down (especially those who donated in my name), I know I had made the right choice and I look forward to a LOT of races this summer and fall, and getting back into running the right way and hopefully staying away from injuries!
Love you all, and love all of your support. This time next year, I hope to be ready for the 5K and half!
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Well....since I have an hour before being picked up for my first postoperative appointment, I thought I would get a blog update in!
I was nervous the whole time on our way (the procedure was in Fargo, an hour south of where I live). I was most worried about the contraption they'd use to hold my eyes open. *shudder*
I have to say that the entire experience was amazing. I got there a few minutes early, but I walked up to the desk, where they had a big bowl of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups How funny is that!? I, of course, skipped them and started the paperwork. Everyone was super friendly (I mean, c'mon, I'm not that chipper at 7 a.m.). They had me do some testing on my eyes, like a wave mapping, and other things. Then, they brought me to the examining room where the assistant talked me through everything and explained what I would be doing postprocedure and for the next couple of weeks (with drops, 4 different kinds). I was told to take a 4+ hour nap after the procedure and then put 2 kinds of drops in each eye every hour until I went to bed.
Then, I saw the doc himself, who looked at my chart and seemed pleased with how "straightforward" my procedure was going to be, and asked if I wanted to go with the bladed surgery versus the bladeless surgery. I chose the bladed one (much cheaper), and we shook hands and he said it would be about 20 minutes before we started.
So, I went to pay for the procedure, which turned out to be $1490 for the procedure plus $300 for the next year's worth of appointments with my eye doctor at home. The $350 coupon? Turns out the fine print says it is only for the platinum package, which was $2000 each eye. Wish I had been a smart cookie and read the back, but I didn't. Lesson learned. Oh, and the doc said that running the 5K on Friday will not be a problem, but that it wouldn't have been a good idea to run the half the next morning. Okay, good choice made there.
I then was taken to the procedure room, and laid down on a nice table, and the assistant handed me a stuffed teddy bear. I almost laughed, but actually was happy to hold onto him throughout. I had troubles staring straight at the light. The light kept moving!!!! But I'm sure it was my eye moving that made the light move. Oy. So, the right eye took a second try, about 2 minutes total, and the left eye took about 1 minute. Seriously? I was done? It went SO fast. No pain whatsoever. After 20 minutes in a dark room with my eyes closed and reclining on a nice soft, buttery leather recliner with a blanket on, I opened my eyes and they stung a little bit, but I could still see enough to walk. Got some eye drops in, and sunglasses put on, and left! I was given Xanax before and after the procedure, so I slept all the way back home and then crawled into bed and slept for 5 hours. When I woke up, after I put all the eye drops in, I blinked, and could see near perfectly!!! My right eye has a mild blurring to it, but so faint I can hardly tell! I am shocked by how fast my eyesight was restored.
SOOOO, an update on the contest between my husband and I. The contest is whomever reaches the 0 first (him 180 and me 160), gets the PRIZE, which is pedicures for me, my sister, and my mom if I win, or he gets to blow $50 at the casino guilt-free (his includes gas since the casino is 45 miles away). He rarely goes, since he supports my being gambling-free, but does like to go once in a while and never spends more than $20.
Anyhoo, here are the stats from3 days ago, 2 days ago, yesterday, and this morning:
Start (3 days ago): Me ~ 166.4 and Him ~ 184.8
2 days ago: Me ~ 164.6 (down 1.8) and Him ~ 184.8 (0 loss)
1 day ago: Me ~ 164.4 (down 0.2) and Him ? (I left before he weighed in and he didn't weigh in after asked)
This morning: ~ 162.4 (down 2) and Him ~ 183.2 (down 1.6)
This is a close one folks, but I have only 2.4 pounds left to win, and he has 3.2!!!
I have been keeping my calories between 1300-1500, and on Monday and Tuesday I worked out like a FIEND. Yesterday and Today there is no working out, and tomorrow is the 5K. I will then work out as able while keeping sweat out of my eyes.
Yay!!!!!!!! I am down a total of 4 pounds since Monday. I don't care if it is water weight. What matters is getting in a healthy manner back down to 160. After that, I am so ready to tackle the 150s. SO READY!!!
Monday, May 16, 2011
I posted on my feed earlier about having a hard decision to make...and I'm sorry if it felt/sounded more dramatic than what it actually is, but I didn't want to post a blog about my decision until I knew my mind was made up.
The choice? Proceed with my LASIK procedure on Wednesday OR run the Fargo Half Marathon on Saturday.
Through getting prepared for the procedure, it hadn't dawned on me that running 13.1 miles may not be a good choice 3 days after getting LASIK. Until my best friend, who also has had the procedure, told me about how you are not supposed to do something to get sweat in your eyes or rubbing your eyes. Hence why you have to take a bath for 2 weeks following the procedure and not a shower.
I argued that I would be wearing my Bondi Band, and sweat would NOT get into my eyes. Was I sure? was the counter argument.
And was I willing to risk hurting my eyes in order to complete this HM?
So, why can't I just reschedule my LASIK?
Because the procedure is $350 off as long as you have the procedure done before May 31, their spring special.
Yes, I know....Sounds like something straight out of King of Queens, but I have done my research on this doc, and he is pretty danged respected in the LASIK community, and I trust him.
And $350 is a LOT of money to us right now, especially with a cosmetic procedure.
A cosmetic procedure that will allow me to run and SEE!!! (I can't wear contact lenses and I refuse to run with glasses).
Umm, but I will still be running the Fargo 5K on Friday (yay!) and meeting up with a few Sparkers beforehand (yay!). And, with the change in plans, my daughter and DH will be watching us at the finish line (yay!!!).
I am still running the 5K for the Charity that I solicited donations for, and even if the doc says not to run the 5K, I will walk it.
I am seeing this as a sign that the half at this time was not meant to be. I plan on taking a week off after the 5K and then starting from scratch with doing the Couch 2 5K program over again, then after that running 3 miles Tuesdays/Thursdays and then upping my mileage on Saturdays by 1 mile a week (so 4 miles, then 5, then 6) and go from there. If I don't have any comeback of injuries, I plan on running the October half marathon in Fargo, the same one I ran my first half last October.
If I continue with nagging injuries for anything over 6 miles, I think I will have to reconsider half marathons and the idea of a full marathon for a few years and stick with 5K and 10K races. I need to do what is best for my body in the long run!
So, onto the contest....I have been in a serious rut with my workouts and eating, and while I am not out of control, I am gaining weight, and I really seriously need to nip this in the bud.
I LOVE competition, and a good reward dangling like a carrot ahead of me doesn't hurt.
SO, I challenged my husband to a contest. We weighed each other this morning (he was 184.8 and I was 166.4) and the first one to, in a HEALTHY manner, reach 180 or 160 pounds will win a reward of our choice. Mine? I started out with it being getting my hair done. But then I thought....that was my 155 goal. So, I changed it to a mani/pedi.
Then, I thought...that's small potatoes and really...will that motivate me to leave DH in my dust? Not really. So, I changed it to my serious goal of pedis for me, my mom, and my sister. I really, really want this because I want us ladies to get out and get pretty nails :o} And my sister bought me and mom a pedi last year and I really want to repay that.
SO, I told them about it, too, so they are on board with me kicking my DH's butt. :o} Yes, I have the fact that he has less to lose and that he is a man to my disadvantage.
But, I have the fitness (he doesn't work out). I have the lack of temptations (he is a teacher in his last week before school is out, cupcakes and other goodies GALORE while I work at home and can use my lunch hour and breaks to walk, mow, work out, etc). I also feel like my body will do my bidding, as long as I do what I am supposed to be doing. I feel as though my plateau is gone, and I just have to plow through into the 150s.
Once I win this contest, 155 is my next goal, and I am psyched to get there!
Well, I just wanted to update you all on where I am, and I will post an update on how my day went below this and will do this every day so I know what I am doing to win this "contest."
~Calories were GREAT today (if you're interested, you can look at my nutrition tracker). I was in range for most things.
~I drank 100 ounces of water
~I went spinning for 25 miles
~ I mowed the lawn, raked, weed whacked, and worked on the landscaping
~I walked my dog for a total of 2 miles
~I walked my daughter to daycare, and then took her for a before-bed walk for a total of 2 miles.
~I avoided temptation. I made plans, and stuck to them.
The only downside to this challenge is we are weighing each other every morning in order to truly see who hits it first.
Today's weights: Me - 166.4 Him - 184.8
I am updating my tracker to reflect this now!
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