Thursday, December 01, 2011
I'm trying to limit my fluids and also food because I have to. I'm on dialysis and I have to watch my weight like a hawk. Basically, whatever I eat or drink ends up making me heavier and I cannot be more than 3 kilos heavier otherwise I'll be in trouble. My blood pressure will drop and I'll faint during treatment if I extract more than 3 kilos.
Today, I went to the mall. I had a turkey and cheese sandwich on whole wheat bread. It was delicious but a little on the salty side. I had some iced water with it. That was supposed to be my lunch but after and hour or two, I was still hungry. So, I bought a little salmon teriyaki rice bowl.
Then I was thirsty, I needed something cold! They were having this promotion on fresh fruit smoothies. Pay Rm25 and you get membership for 2 years (entitles you to 20% off their drinks), a RM10 voucher which I used immediately and a refillable bottle, which you have to bring in order to get the 20% discount on their drinks.
So, after buying that I decided to take a cab home coz I needed to get my drink into the fridge within an hour. But after I got home, I consumed about more than half the bottle.......oops!
I'll have to take less fluids during dinner, I guess. I'm trying!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
I've been so lax when it comes to food and drink, especially drink! I am a dialysis patient and I have watch my fluid levels like a hawk, among other things, like potassium, phosphate, protein, salt, in other words I can't eat and drink like a normal person because I don't urinate as much. I only urinate twice a day!
I've been warned by the nurses that either my heart will give out or my fistula (the thing in my arm that enables dialysis) will stop. So, I'd better listen and wisen up. I have to, I mean I HAVE TO watch my fluid intake. I also have to watch what I eat more closely as I've been gaining a little too!
I refuse to give up on myself! I can do this!
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
My belly roll is getting more noticeable and I'm going up in weight too! Only about 3kg but I feel so fat!!! But I have such a good appetite that I just can't say no to my snacks! I'm snacking constantly!!! I feel like such a pig!!!! I should know better!! But I'm just so hungry all the time!!! I'm also so thirsty all the time, I'm in trouble in the dialysis center too!
The nurses are warning me if I continue to extract 4kgs each time, my heart is going to give out or my fistula is going to die!!! I really should know better!!! But whenever I'm faced with food or drink, I get temporary amnesia and I ingest! Gosh! I'm such a pig!!! Help!!!
Sunday, November 27, 2011
As a dialysis patient, I don't urinate as much as a normal person, therefore I not only have to watch my fluids (primarily) but also my overall diet as I can't drink or eat as much as a normal person.
This weekend I went overboard! I don't even dare weigh myself now as I just know that I'm super heavy! My mom cooked spaghetti bolognaise on Saturday and I had a few heaping helpings. Then after each helping, I felt thirsty and had to drink each time.
Oh gosh! I really need to be more watchful of what I eat. But then again, I think, if I die, then I die, at least I went out enjoying myself. I'll have to be a better person though, so I that when I die, I'll be with The Lord, Jesus!
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Today, my brother and father went to work and my Mom went to her friend's house. I was left alone at home. Normally, I can fill the hours with stuff I like to do like surf the net, read, watch TV and sew. But today, I just felt so bleh. I felt like a dark cloud is looming over me, making me yearn for company.
I considered calling a friend but most of my friends are too busy with work to go out to the mall with me (for instance). And after I hang up, I will still feel lonely and bleh!
Well, I decided today, bleh or not, I will finish reading my new book, Inheritance. I didn't really like the ending but I enjoyed reading it all the same. But I still feel bleh!
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