Thursday, May 26, 2011
Because of financial and health problems, I'm currently still living with my parents. My only brother is also living with my parents because of financial problems, but my brother doesn't have health problems.
It's just that my Mom keeps focusing on what I don't do around the house. She turns a blind eye to what I do to help around the house. It's like what I do doesn't get noticed but what I don't do gets aired out frequently, with my Mom calling me useless etc. Well, what about the things I do!?
It's gotten so bad that now I don't even feel like doing anything at all, nothing I do is ever appreciated. My Mom goes out with her friends everyday, leaving the breakfast dishes undone, who does those breakfast dishes every morning? Me! But does she ever thank me? No! My brother also leaves his breakfast dishes in the sink every morning, who does it? Me!
Whenever my brother does something to help around the house, my Mom will thank him profusely and go on and on about it, but whenever I do something, it goes unseen and unappreciated.
Sometimes, I just don't feel like doing something because I'm tired or because I'm just physically incapable of doing it. I'm a dialysis patient, so the the arm with the access in it can't lift heavy loads. I also need lots of sleep particularly after my dialysis treatments. Also, I'm not a morning person.
All I'm saying is, I have my limitations but it's not like I do nothing around the house, it's just that no one notices. Sometimes, I just feel like leaving this house and let nature take it course so I just fade away for lack of dialysis and die, then they will finally notice the little things I do when I'm no longer there.
But that is just wistful thinking because that will be like suicide. And I don't think that brave or admirable but just a form of running away. I'm just so sick of the whole situation.
To say that the Chinese (I'm Chinese) only appreciate the sons and not the daughters is quite true, in my case, at least.....
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Well, my Mom and brother are away at the moment, visiting Singapore to spend some time with my Mom's younger sister. So, tonight, it's just me and my Dad. So, to fix a small dinner for 2 is my task today.
My Mom and brother left for Singapore yesterday morning, but the night before that (Sunday night), my Mom bought 2 focaccias for us. I'm planning to fill the focaccias with bacon ham, cheese & tomato, then I'm heating it on a flat pan so the cheese gets all gooey and melty! Yum! Can't wait!
In the meantime, to keep the munchies at bay, I'm steaming 2 mini yams, one for me and one for Dad. The yams are really small, a little bigger than a large chicken egg but packed with complex carbohydrate! Good for you, right?
Yup! I'm home alone atm, so I'm planning to get some exercise in before dinner, and I'll be going to home fellowship tonight too. So, I'd better move it as it's already half past 3! Gotta hang out some laundry too! Ta!
Monday, May 23, 2011
Lately, I've been fixated about getting a pair of low-waist skinny jeans that fit just so. Y'know, like a second skin but still comfortable. I actually had my heart set on a faded blue Levi's. Only that it's more than RM200!
I was debating with myself, should I get it now or when I've lost my belly roll? Well, because of lack of finances, I've been putting getting my Levi's off.
However, yesterday, I bought a pair of nice lacy hipster panties and a comfy seamless bra. And it wasn't too expensive but I now have less money in my savings.
Well, I guess, the skinny jeans will have to be the end goal treat, when I finally reach my goal weight and don't have a belly roll. In the meantime, I'll treat myself in other, less expensive ways.
I look at it this way, at least when I finally get my new jeans, I have a nice pair of hipster panties to go with it and a nice, seamless bra to go under my T-shirt!
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Oh Lord! I hate my belly roll! I was trying on a pair of low-waist jeans today and my belly literally just spilled over the low waist!!!! I'm not kidding!!!! I was mortified, with myself and my darn belly roll!
That pair that I tried on was 50% off and was a really cute design. But after looking at the belly roll spilling over the waist, I decided that this time I mean business. I'm going to stop overeating and exercise regularly! Whatever it takes to lose that belly!
Then, when the belly roll is gone, I will look into buying cute new clothes!
Saturday, May 21, 2011
I went to the mall yesterday and I bought 3 pairs of adorable earrings! You can get 3 pairs of earrings there for RM10, not expensive at all, pretty cheap, actually. One pair had tiny egg burgers, another had tiny crab roll sushi and the 3rd had tiny hot dogs, all made of clay. I also bought a pair of daisy hair-clips (also made of clay).
Reading this, you may think I'm a teen or younger, but I'm almost 40! I will be in less than 2 years. But I don't care. I look young for my age, everyone tells me so. And as long as I can get away with it, I'll keep wearing cute things until I really look too old for them. But even when my age starts showing, I don't know if I can give up my hair accessory and earring collection. I guess I'll always be young at heart.
On an earlier trip, I also bought a bracelet from the same shop with a sandwich, a hotdog, a burger, a croissant in clay charms with a little pink bell. I really wanted to buy a sushi charm bracelet but I stopped myself because I didn't want to spend all of my RM50. I'm saving up for some Levi's jeans, so I need to be more careful with my spending.
However, I did buy a small bottle of gold nail polish. I'm now typing this with gold fingernails! How cool is that?! I also painted my toe nails in the same color! Cool, huh?
Actually, I don't care how old I get, I will always have the same sense of quirky style!
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