Monday, September 17, 2012
Last week was not the happiest nor easiest one in my world. I was ill most of the week with the swelling and pain in my mouth, It finaly went away after most of the week went by. I am glad to be feeling better.
I am also glad that I didn't fet around to changing my eating very much. i lost 3.2 this week which makes me quite happy and when combined with my 2 pound loss from the previous week, they certainly balance out those gains of .4 and .8. Being somewhat ill last week helped things along, but I am aware of that.
My Monday blog will share my week plans and goals.
Take care--happy Sunday!!
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
I am awake, of course, and it is much earlier than usual. Part of my denture broke today and I tried to patch it together to get through the day and it hurt the inside of my mouth that was already chapped and sore from a cold or allergy reaction. I woke up because the inside or my torn up motu was so dry that it is way too sore to explain. I will add that to my list of physical complaints.
I typically eat less during the day than I do in the evening, but this kept me from eating much of anything today. My lips are chapped and swollen, I think from something I got into when I was working in my garden on Saturday afternoon. Then, any food that seemed appealing to me was too acidic for my sore mouth to manage. I am going to get a lot of red letter comments from Spark People when I track my food.
I got a message from the principal that scheduled a meeting for Tuesday morning before I have my morning duty. I just had duty on Friday and here I am doing it again. I doubt that I mentioned that one of the other teachers counted up the number of days that each teacher had duty and it turns out that I have 9 days of duty, a special ed teacher has 8 days of duty, and then most of the other teachers have 5 days--with a couple of them only having 4 days for the entire quarter. She did this after I explained that the morning duty prevented me from being able to do any tutoring before school. This is the way that this woman does things--unfairly and showing partiality to her pretty, young, "yes-people" without listening to the voice of experience, skill or understanding. I really get tired of this situation. I am trying to rise above things and be proactive, but when I don't feel well, it is too much for me to do with this sutuation that has went on for far too many years. Grr-rr.
I was accosted at the pool by a lifeguard who I have taken to task and complained about in writing on more than one occasion. When I came in, there were signs on the locker room doors that said that nobody was allowed to do any walking or water jogging during lap-swim sessions. I thought it was a bit silly because everyone needs to do some warm-ups and cool-downs, but if it puts a stop from the ladies getting in the pool and preventing me from working out a half an hour before their 6:00 class and if it ends the strange recent practice of private swim lessons occurring during lap swim, then "YAY!" However, this lifeguard yelled at me and told me that I was "banned from the pool" and couldn't get in. She cited the name of the aquatic director and singled me out. It was embarrassing and rude and inappropriate. I decided that I wasn't going to put up with her nonsense, so I said "I'm going to lap swim and I am getting in the water." That is precisely what I did. I am still angry, especially today, when I kept to lap swimming rather than mixing some walking at the beginning of my workout and exercises throughout my lap swimming--today there were at least 65 people doing things other than lap swimming, the same life guard spent 6 minutes flirting with a male guard and kept me from exercising while she had the lap lane line draped all over the deep end of the pool, there were 2 swim lessons taught in the slow lanes where I swim (because I am not that proficient) and then, 13 minutes before the end of lap swimming, the male lifeguard took out the lap lanes and let the ladies in the coming class get in the pool. I wasn't the only one put out, I was keeping my thoughts to myself--but there were 2 of the regular men who work out then who went to the office and complained loudly. My daughter works there and she had to handle their complaints and she is the reason that I have been quietly trying to figure out how to handle this. I talked to one of the guys about what happened on Friday, because he wasn't there, and he was outraged--he said that "you have been coming here and working out for a long time and if other people were as kind and respectful as you are when they swim, the pool would be a perfect place." That helped me a lot--he then went to tell my daughter about what happened to me--funny in a way, but I do try to keep my business separated from her work.
My rheumy was overloaded for some odd reason today--the first time ever and I have been seeing him for about 15 years. The nurse asked me if I minded seeing his nurse-practitioner and I decided to do it. I started being in a fibro flare about two weeks ago and was expecting him to offer me a kenalog injection. However, she was concerned with my meds and how I am taking them. She recommended that I cut my hydrocodone in half and take a half of one every three hours, saving a full one for bedtime. She recommended that instead of me taking 900 mg of gabapentin every 6 hours (3-300 caps) that I take 900 in the morning, 600 at noon, 600 in the early evening, and then 1500 at bedtime to help promote sleep that lasts longer. She recommended that instead of me taking 100 mg of Savella in the morning and at bedtime that I should take 100 mg in the morning, 50 mg at noon, and 50 mg at dinner time. She said that this would give me more relief from my fibromyalgia during the daytime hours and that I would be on amore even keel with pain management throughout the day along with a boost of meds that would promote sleeping at night. I am going to start this in the morning. She told me to give her a call in the next week or so if it didn't help because there would always be something else we might try. She reminded me a lot of my dear Dr, Miller who is no longer around in her way of looking at things. It is good to hear that there are always some other choices. I liked her a great deal. She also doesn't think that my hip should wait until June--she doesn't think I would have to be off work for 6 weeks and suggested that I talk with my ortho about that before I make up my mind on everything.
Last week, I missed two doctor appointments--I am not sure how I did that. I never do that. One of them was a result of the holiday that left me thinking Tuesday was Monday all day. I went to the DMV that evening for my vision test and to renew my license. I haven't been driving for quite a while because of my cataracts. I did reschedule an appointment with the eye doc because the situation is getting worse and I realize that I cannot get the funds for the corrective lenses. I need to move ahead with these surgeries asap. Anyway, to make a long story short, my right eye failed the vision test. That meant that they gave me a restriction on my license and I am only allowed to drive a car with outside mirrors. I was blantantly flabbergasted at all of that. I have absolutely no business driving until I can see better. Also, don't all cars have outside mirrors these days? It makes me nervous to think of the types of people the state of IL is letting drive these days.
I also missed a follow-up appointment with the doctor who did the fusion on my neck. I need to schedule my mammogram. I need to call my ortho and I also need to reschedule the missed appointment for my neck. I need to do a lot of things for my class and I need to sleep. I need to do some things around my house and I need to do some things with my two youngest kids who are both having some issues in their school lives with classes and peers. I need to do a lot. I don't know when, but I know what I should do. I will manage things and I shouldn't be complaining, but I think of the people who always say: "You won't be given more to do than you can handle." I think that is a lot of lip service and that people who say that should simply say nothing. I think it is possible to have more on your plate than you can handle and I feel as if I am there right now.
My goal for tomorrow is to lighten my load. I see my therapist and this will be the topic. He knows me and when I tell him that I feel overwhelmed with all of this, I expect that he will guide me into fixing things. I am not sure what I will cut out, but I will do that asap. I need to have things in a manageable stack rather than haphazardly coming at me from all directions. I can do this and then I can get back to focusing on what is important to me--my family, my health, my weight loss.
I thank you all for bearing with me as I thought all of this through. Take care and keep things under control in your worlds too.
Monday, September 10, 2012
I have had a rough day with the pain in my hip--even treading water aggravated it today. Grocery shopping with a lot of walking after an extra long trip to the pool didn't help much. I have an appointment with my rheumy on Monday after school, so maybe he will have a suggestion or two. I want to hold out until early June for my replacement, so I need to manage this in a better way. I used ice with my Flector patches today. That finally gave me some relief. I hope that if I keep getting my meds at the right time and can go easier at work than I have been doing that I will tame it a bit and get the pain into a more manageable state. It is important to me to wait until the end of the school year for my surgery--I want a year that is uninterrupted by major surgeries for a change. This year has given me a group of kids who need what I can give them as opposed to either nobody or a sub who isn't a reading specialist.
We had a "special" Congregational meeting today with two major pieces of business today. One of them was to discuss using our sustaining funds to purchase a dilapidated property that is adjoining our church property. That won 42 to 21. The other was an announcement that the selection committee has found a pastor who also thinks we are the church for her. She will be coming and doing a service in about a month and we will vote on whether or not she will be our new pastor. I sure hope this is the one. We have a sweet interim pastor, but it is not her intention to be here full time. She is not ordained and doesn't do Communion, weddings, funerals. She is a great preacher type, but we need someone who can do all of the components of worship. With each passing day, I miss Michael and I am not contacting him because I don't want him to be in violation of any rules of any kind. I'd sure like to have an hour or two to hang out with him... I'd like to catch up on what he has been up to since I saw him last in June.
I have a heavy duty week from Monday through Wednesday this week, then it settles down for the end of the week. Monday is my rheumy appointment after school. On Tuesday, I have an appointment with my therapist after school followed by a meeting at the church where I am recruiting students for tutoring. On Wednesday, we have a staff meeting followed by an RIEA meeting (our teacher's union( followed by my grad class. I plan to go to the pool after these meetings and classes each day. I have a presentation in my class on Wednesday to add to regular assignments--and of course, I'm behind in reading. I will be a busy girl until things calm down on Thursday. All I have is some late work followed by a Weight Watcher's meeting before I go to the pool. Friday is mine--and I will go to the pool right after work.
i have my schedule and my food plan for the week. I have my new mantra--"Be proactive rather than reactive." I have a determination to be successful and positive so that I can be happy and healthy in the hectic nature of my world.
Have a great week--and stay happy and healthy yourselves!
Sunday, September 09, 2012
There's a double meaning to this blog. I certainly worked and I worked hard. I am trying to do some of the things we have been learning at our trainings from the Steven Covey people. A big one is to be "proactive not reactive." It helps to have things under control before there is a problem. Of course, there is that thing that teachers have to do called "being flexible" and I am at the mercy of each teacher, child and parent who we work with. Anyway, that has been my mantra this week and it helped me in an awkward situation at the pool.
I lost two pounds this week. I am not sure why the feed didn't show it, but it is a relief==that turns my three week total into a loss of .8 which isn't much, but it is mine and I am happy to lose it slowly. I just don't like to see gains.
I'll share more next time--just wanted to touch base with you all.
Saturday, September 01, 2012
Hi there my friends,
I have been a really good girl--eating nothing that is out of line (except birthday pizza on Saturday) and exercising daily that includes stretching daily and some strengthening every other day. So...this week, I gained .8 and last week, I gained .4 for a total of 1,2 pounds back in 2 weeks. Neither bothers me too much alone, but a gain two weeks in a row indicates that I need to figure out what to do about it. I have a couple of ideas, but I'm going to keep them to myself as I write this and then include them as a comment, so I can get your expert advice.
First of all--I am measuring, so the idea of our servings being bigger estimates than they should be is not correct. Secondly, I am not nibbling or snacking on things I am not counting. This goal is too important to me to do anything like that. My hip is really hurting--a lot today--and having a good experience with that replacement is extremely important to me. I need to lose 30 pounds to match the new, shorter height I now stand at and I want to take care of myself. I am getting in a lot of exercise--it isn't high intensity because I am not able to walk that fast with my walker--but I am moving a good deal, more than my trackers even show. I walk anywhere from 12,000 to 19,000 steps every day and that doesn't include the 1.5-2 hours a day I spend in the pool doing exercises and swimming laps. I am up to 26 laps again, except for today and I just hurt too much. I only got in 12 today and I knew I had to let it go.
Medication--It hasn't changed in a long time. I take a BP pill every day because it was inching up there for no apparent reason. I could have insisted on doing it with my diet--and I think I do a good job of keeping my sodium down, but I didn't want to take any chances. I take gabapentin or neurontin at the max dosage of 900mg four times a day. 6000 units of vitamin D daily, 65 mg of iron, 100 mg of Savella twice a day (also a max dose), Hydrocodone 7/5/500 for breakthrough pain up to four a day, a 75mg fentanyl patch that I change every three days, Flector patches that I use as needed for inflammation (pain), and an injection of 1 cc of cyanocobalamine (vitamin B12), once a month. If you are aware of meds, these things are mostly for pain due to neurological damage (so many sclapels in my spine), due to fibromyalgia disruptions, and pain due to arthritis and bone damage. The reality os that the meds help some but after some 45 surgeries in the past 14 years, pain is part of who I am.
Another thing is I have interrupted sleep every night. I know that having a block of uninterrupted sleep is best, but when the meds wear off, I wake up. I do all of the things I know about falling asleep, but it takes time until the next medication and usually ice bags work enough to get me back to sleep. I cannot lie down, I sleep in a recliner. I do get 6 hours eventually--in about 3 increments and with a lot of effort. It is hard to make yourself sleep when you are not sleeping and short of making it dark, boring and quiet, I have no other plans. (I cannot climb into the tub or shower alone and I don't wake others up because I cannot sleep.)
Eating--I generally eat a piece of fruit for lunch on work days and I have a second piece or some veggies late-to-mid-morning. When the kids are dismissed at 3, I have lunch which is either Greek yogurt or a sandwich on 2 slices of light, multi-grain bread. Along with that, I have a tomato and fruit. For an afternoon snack, I have something like a Weight Watchers 2 or 3 point snack and fruit or popcorn and veggies. For dinner, I have some sort of protein--often my favorite, grilled chicken--with veggies, and a side dish that is made of brown rice or pasta. I have an evening snack that often is a half of a sandwich on light multi-grain bread, a cup of nonfat milk, and a fiber one bar. If I get hungry at other times, I have more fruit as a rule--I have a sweet tooth that likes being fed. The fruits I usually have are blueberries, strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, grapes, plums, bananas, oranges. I also sip on water all day long and typically get 10 or more glasses in. I do get regular (like every day) messages from Spark People that I need to have more food, but I cannot see eating to be eating.
Other things that are important to know when you consider this is that I often have a good deal of stress, mostly work related but sometimes related to my family. I have maintained my weight loss of over 140 pounds on my regular diet without trying hard for months. I do stir things up a bit on the weekend where I am eating more in the morning when I have more time and less in the afternoon/evening. I often fall asleep in the later part of the morning, like around 4:30 or 5 and that is when I grab a couple of more hours of sleep before I go to work. When I wake up, there isn't time to eat so I can get to work on time and then, when I get to work, I work straight through my day at school. I have reading classes for my little kids straight through the day with no break from 8:30 to 2:45--even getting to the restroom is a problem. After school, I have at least one and usually two doctor's appointments a week after school, I also have one class night (Wednesday), and I go to the pool each evening. I go to Weight Watchers on Thursday evenings. I have 6 of my 8 kids still at home and they help, but I sometimes have to run an errand here of there, and as most teachers do, I bring home work to do. I get spark time in the evening and I watch my soap (Days of Our Lives) at ten PM, unless I fall asleep early. I go to sleep by 11 on my most normal days and I often wake up between 1:30 and 3:30. I get back to sleep between 4:15 and 5:30, and then I have a mad rush at 7 to leave for work by 7:30--I have to leave at 7 on morning meeting days and 7:15 on the days I have door/playground duty.
On the weekends, I get a couple of extra hours of sleep and get up around 8 or 9:30 rather than 7. I eat at my leisure and do chores around the house in the morning, usually having to be to the bank before it closes at noon. I also get extra spark time on the weekend mornings. On Sunday, we go to church at 10. I go to the pool at 1 and stay for some extra time to relax a bit, especially when I can get my husband to go. We come home and work in the yard or do a big grocery run for our crew. I work on other things like home work or teacher work and then we prepare dinner together. On Saturday evening, we watch some TV together. On Sunday, I organize things for the week. I am a creature of habit.
What might help me to get my weight loss jump-started or at least moved away from these small gains I have had the past two weeks? If you have ideas, please advise. Remember, I am asking--but I am a tired and sore mother and teacher, be gentle with me. Laying my entire life out there, on the line is not easy to do, but I need help.
I appreciate each of you!!
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