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Wednesday, 3/2 Our son has Asperger's, what next?

Wednesday, March 02, 2011

Hi everyone,

Life has been hectic and I am under the gun to get my National Boards Renewal finished. I have a couple of good dieter friends who are also new recruits to SP who are going to help me by reading and critiquing. I'll have some things ready for them to read this weekend. This is an important project to me, so please hang in there with me. I try to stop by here and I track food and the like each day, but I cannot get enough time to be as sociable as I like.

I am also quite frustrated with my youngest son's school. He has had some bigger issues that are, at the least, law-breaking at his school. Our youngest boy is autistic and makes noises. Check out any info on this and you will see this goes hand in hand. I am not sure if there is a change in the frequency or what, but their way of handling this is office referrals and discipline which isn't appropriate for a disability. (And, it is the special ed teacher who is writing the referrals for this!! It is her job to work with his needs and help resolve them.) It happened again yesterday and I was led to believe that my son was doing something inappropriate. I took away some privileges before I realized it wasn't something he can control, he went into the back of the house and punished himself by scratching his arms bloody. I am so ashamed of myself for punishing him on their word. I have spent many frantic hours with his doctors on the phone the past two days and today, I called the principal there and, well, I told him exactly what I thought of him, his staff and school. I told him that I held myself responsible that my child was taken to that place, but I also told him tha the and his school owned more of it than I do. I told him to take a look at the outcome of his handiwork and suggested that he and his staff aren't professional or caring on their student's behalf. (Remember that this is my youngest child of 8 and I have had issues on behalf of each of my older children in this same junior high. There is a sad, uncaring climate in this awful building.) I told him that I was going to look into due process for a better opportunity for my son to receive the education that special education law says he is entitled to.

Now, I need to take a next step. I am canceling physical therapy tomorrow to get him to the doctor myself. I will make a plan and approach them with an agenda that will not be relegated to silly conversations about absurdities and make specific requests to benefit my child and hopefully other children in his position. I am truly sick of this situation that has been horrible for far too long. As an educator, I am disheartened by this situation coupled with these poor performing people who make so many think we are lazy, incompetent people who are overpaid and who don't deserve to be treated as professionals making a respectable wage, especially when I have almost as much education and training as many doctors.

Anyway, as always, my plate is full--but this is different because my heart is heavy and I don't have a plan for this inappropriate situation. I will get it figured out, but am looking forward to a break from the stress and in helping my son to get past the damage that has been done to him.

Prayerfully yours,
Sylvia

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GREENMAMA10 3/4/2011 12:47AM

    Sylvia, I am so sorry to hear about this and I can imagine that it must be very stressful!

I just can not comprehend why the Special Education TEACHER would refer your son to the principal. I thought special education teachers were specialized in dealing with the needs of their students, and I would expect a teacher in that field to be more capable than the school principal at handling a child's needs in their class.

I will be praying for your son and family, and that you all are able to deal with this with God's help and guidance. emoticon

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MTNGRL 3/3/2011 6:21PM

    Sylvia, first and foremost you are a loving mother who is worried about her child. That come first and and we understand that. I had to fight a nasty vice principal and some teachers when my son was in elementary school. I wondered why they even went into teaching. You have an insider's view of the education system but the view that is most important is your son's welfare. Praying God continues to give you strength as you fight this battle.

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LOULOUBELLE2 3/3/2011 10:49AM

    Don't worry about being the social butterfly here on Sparks...Those of us that know and love you understand completely. I am here for you and I hope you know that.

It sure does seem that you have a black cloud over your head.....Hopefully you be able to breath a bit easier when your National Boards are done. So glad you have some help with that.

The situation with you DS is deplorable, but he has a Loving and Concerned Mom that will set things right in time. So sorry that it's added stress for you.

My Prayers are with you, I wish I could just huff and puff and blow that black cloud away from you.
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EMRANA 3/3/2011 9:31AM

  emoticon

I was already thinking before you said it that this must be especially hard for you as an educator. You understand the school systems a lot better than most, and you know what your son should be receiving.

I hope you get some good alternatives. Thinking of you.

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JHADZHIA 3/3/2011 12:13AM

    So very sorry this happened to your son :(((
I hope you can get it resolved. Its a shame you have to use this school with its horrible record :((
I am glad you got help with your papers, it always good to get fresh eyes on them..
{{{{gentle hugs}}}}
Linda

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DIGBOI 3/2/2011 10:49PM

    Sylvia,
As a para-educator and having worked with special education students in elementary, middle as well as high schools for the past 20 years I am saddened by what you and your child are going through. Staff and administrators who do not have any understanding of special needs students and their issues have no right working in public schools.
I do hope things get resolved or you get to send your son to a school where adults working with him care for him and help him deal with his issues. emoticon

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Tuesday, 3/1 I Won a Giveaway from the Daily Spark!!

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

Hi all,

How is that for turning a particularly tough day around? I came home and was told by at least three people that "Mom, you have a package." I wasn't too curious because I order free things for teaching and an occasional item on ebay, so I get packages fairly often.

Today was really lousy. We are doing standardized testing in Illinois this week--our friendly problem, the ISAT. Besides teaching all day long, before school, after school and through my short little break, I was asked to do some extra work that I have been trying to squeeze in. I also got another call from my youngest son's school--he did some misbehaving (noise-making) in a class and they weren't very nice to me about it. I also had an extra meeting added on both before my before school lesson and after my after school lesson. It was a lot more than I needed on top of a few naughtier than usual children today.

After work, I had physical therapy on my shoulder--and although my range of motion is way ahead of schedule, my strength and endurance is not coming along at an equivalent rate. I went from there to a rather unpleasant shopping trip at Walmart that culminated with me not having enough money on me to pay for everything I selected until I ran over to the bank office located in the store. (Of course, the bank teller was chatting it up with a couple of customers so I had to add in making other people wait because I hadn't planned well enough.)

So that brings me back to getting home in time to a chorus of "Mom, you have a package." I looked at the nice little box and thought that I recognized the brand name "Attune" but couldn't recall purchasing anything named "Attune." On the inside of the box was 3 bags of Attune probiotic crunch and 4 boxes of Attune chocolate bars along with a nice handwritten note: Sylvia, Congrats on winning the Attune Chocolate probiotics $50 giveaway on Daily Spark. Enjoy!"

Wow, what a way to change the day!!

And--I wrote this to share the fact that random members really do win these prizes, so hang in there and keep signing up. I have only won one other thing in my life, so this is awesome.

Thanks, Daily Spark!!

Gentle hugs Everyone!!
Sylvia

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MTNGRL 3/3/2011 6:13PM

    Congrats! I just won something myself. Pretty cool!!

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JHADZHIA 3/3/2011 12:17AM

    Congratulations!! Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person!! My Spark buddies have been lucky lately, one got a fitness DVD on the wheel spin, and lots have been getting big numbers..
Your days are just too full :( Your shoulder maybe isn't getting the attention it needs..
Hope things ease up for you soon..
{{{gentle hugs}}}
Linda

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LOULOUBELLE2 3/2/2011 12:05PM

    emoticonWhat a great surprise. Do let us know how they are.....It might be really interesting to find out where you can buy them or their price. Health Food Stores cross my mind, but then "maybe not". Can't wait to find out what you think of them.....Congrats Sylvia, and what a great way to end a stressful day.
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Comment edited on: 3/2/2011 12:06:34 PM

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EMRANA 3/2/2011 10:05AM

  Good for you! You've been due for a lovely surprise like that!

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ENUFF81020 3/2/2011 7:07AM

    Chocolates when I'm dieting aren't a problem for me for a couple of reasons. One is that if I choose to, I have a house full of people to share them with. Secondly, these little bars are wrapped in perfect one serving sizes to make them easy.

Also, they are probiotics which adds something along with other nutrients like calcium that I need, so I am good. Quite honestly, I eat something chocolate or sweet most days like a Luna snack bar or a SlimFast snack bar--so this gives me a new choice.

I opened the Chocolate Chocolate Chip Munch to try first and found that a little bit of that really filled me up and kept me away from the Doritos that somebody bought and were calling my name. This surprise was a gift in disguise. After I try a few more items, I'll do a review either in my blog or on the Daily Spark page and let everyone know the plus and minus of this item that I probably would have never heard of before. I am worried that I am going to learn to love this and find out I cannot find them here or that they are way out of my food budget range.

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KKKAREN 3/2/2011 6:58AM

    What a great surprise!

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NANA7_NOT4 3/2/2011 12:50AM

    Winning is nice, but chocolates when you're dieting! Defeats the purpose. Don't mean to seem down about it, but that would put me out of dieting. :(

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NANA7_NOT4 3/2/2011 12:48AM

    Winning is nice, but chocolates when you're dieting! Defeats the purpose. Don't mean to seem down about it, but that would put me out of dieting. :(

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JENQUEENOFCHAOS 3/1/2011 11:30PM

    emoticon
So happy for you! It sounds like you needed a special surprise today emoticon

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JOYCERN12 3/1/2011 11:18PM

    WOW, I FORGOT EVEN SEEING THAT, emoticon

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BRAVEONE92 3/1/2011 10:48PM

    Wow, that was a sweet surprise at the end of
a very stressful day. emoticon

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BLESSED2BEME 3/1/2011 10:24PM

    Wow! What a neat surprise. I'm glad you won - you deserve something to smile about:)

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MY4KITTIES 3/1/2011 10:11PM

    Congrats and enjoy your goodies!

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ELSCO55 3/1/2011 9:55PM

    emoticon Enjoy

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Friday, 2/25 Another hectic week!!

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Hi all,

This week has been a doozy!!

Besides being sick with pneumonia, I have tried to do all of my work, extra duties, and a lot of extra curricular stuff. I don't know when life will loosen up a bit, but I am worn out. I know that I am often my own worst enemy, and this week is a shining example.

I started back to the pool on Monday after taking the weekend off to rest. My doctor called me Monday evening and again tried to get me to go in the hospital, but I just couldn't do that. You cannot rest in the hospital and it is impossible to get the care when you need it, especially things like pain meds. I promised him that Id take my temperature twice a day and that I'd call him if things got worse. I haven;t had a fever and I am not worse. I just wish I was better. I get winded so easily and cannot do my work out at the level I am used to doing it. I'm pretty sure it is the illness that is causing this.

I haven't had a moment to get to the phone to call my doctors and am supposed to schedule a follow-up with both my PCP and my back doctor to get results of my tests. I did get to use the phone a bit on Wednesday, but it was to call a couple of parents about their children who weren't cooperating or behaving the way I expect. That took all of my free time for two days and now I am doing some extra stuff per the request of my principal. It never seems to let up. I worked until 6:30 tonight and still have three big things to do on my list at school. I do plan to go tomorrow but that is to work on my writing for my National Boards renewal.

Next week is the ISAT testing in IL and I am going to be missing some of my lessons in order to help give the test to special kids. It is easy work, but frustrating, when I have so many students that I am responsible for,

I need this weekend, I know that... I got to go to my 15 year old daughter's play on Thursday. I cannot go to the other performance tomorrow because my 13 year old is in a bowling tournament out of town. This is a problem because our car broke down and is int he shop getting a very pricey new transmission. I don't even want to think about how we are going to pay for that.

I think I need Calgon to take me away--but until that happens, I'll just keep venting here and praying. Those things help me out of these tricky moments.

Take care, one and all.
Gentle hugs,
Sylvia

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ENUFF81020 2/27/2011 10:52AM

    My doctor and I discussed if I should go to work. He asked me if I was going to go to work before I had a chance to ask him.. I told him that I wanted to go and his answer was that he would prefer if I went to the hospital. I asked him what they could do for me that I couldn't do for myself and his answer was that they could give me stronger antibiotics at a faster rate with the supervision and staff available. He then cautioned me on all of the things to look out for and wanted a phone call that I couldn't make.

The problem with me calling in sick is that they don't get a sub for me (probably because it is almost impossible to share my program with others at the level of intensity that I do my work.) My students are the neediest in our building and do without their reading support every time I am gone for any reason. It makes it tough for me to be absent in good conscience because I know what is at stake for them.

Thanks for asking--good questions!

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JHADZHIA 2/26/2011 11:52PM

    You have far too much on your plate and really shouldn't be doing much of anything except resting when you are that sick..Everyone else that works is allowed to call in sick, why not you? With a lung sickness I would certainly guess you shouldn't be trying any aerobic activity. Did you get your Dr.'s clearance to exercise? Also, isn't this highly contagious? Do you want to risk passing it on to your students?
Please do take better care of yourself..
Hope your Sunday is restful...
{{{gentle hugs}}}
Linda

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EMRANA 2/26/2011 1:40PM

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A second Saturday blog-To my colleagues in Wisconsin

Saturday, February 19, 2011

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Hi there,

As an educator in Illinois who is fully aware of the atrocities that can happen to public employees, I am totally dumbfounded at the state of affairs in Wisconsin. My grandfather fought hard and sometimes violent battles during the turn of the century for laborers to have the right to collective bargaining. In one fell political swoop, Governor Scott Walker is trying to steal that right from anyone in the public arena who didn't support his campaign and I am horrified that he has made such an obviously biased move as this. By taking police and firefighters who supported him out of the conversation, he has made this an act that is singling out anyone who didn't back him as a candidate and dissolved any credibility in his actions. As I have been ill today and catching up on the news in my neighboring state, I am feeling disbelief that this has gotten this far. I am so glad that the police and firefighters are there along with the teachers and other public employees stating that they will not allow this divide and conquer mentality. I am so glad to see families who support the good people who work hard to keep Wisconsin such a lovely place to live so visible. I am glad to see educators joining with road workers and nurse's aides and other affected people. I am proud of the educators from IL who are there to support you as well.

I am certain that you are all uncomfortable with the press and the situation that has caused this. I am equally certain that it is a difficult time for you to lose benefits with the recession hurting everyone--but you have come to the bargaining table and offered to play nicely with the political bullies who aren't playing nicely at all. I read the support that you have been given from the White House (although my husband is a Federal employee who is now living with a wage freeze that wasn't bargained for either, so I am unsure of this trend.) I am proud of you for being professional, caring people who have learned from Dr. King and of the value of peaceful demonstrations. I wish you success in maintaining the fair, and equitable right to bargain collectively that is the mainstay of fair employee treatment.

I am nervous that your situation is the beginning of a frightening political trend to destroy the system that my grandfather worked hard to help establish. The middle class workers in this country deserve better than we typically get. Best wishes to you all, whether you are in Madison or at home. I hope this works out in support of the hard working educators and state employees in Wisconsin.

Gentle hugs,
Sylvia
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DAWNWATERWOMAN 2/22/2011 9:34PM

    sending out prayers for all the educators in the country. Love ya, Dawn emoticon

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Saturday, 2/19 Some answers and plans

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Hi all,

I now understand why my mood has been off. After going through lots of information and a few more tests, it turns out that I have pneumonia. I have patches in both of my lungs and it is a bit of a surprise why I haven't been feverish or had other symptoms besides some shortness of breath the past two days when I was working out at the pool. I found that to be a bit odd, but since I was working out, I reasoned that it was because I was pushing myself harder to have a better level of cardio when I was water jogging. My doctor wanted me in the hospital, but after having spent some recent time there with my daughter and having all of my memories of why hospitals are bad places resurrected, I declined. I promised to take my meds and get some rest here at home. I promised to let him know how I am doing in a few days and I will schedule my follow-up appointment.

I got info from my PCP that my stress test came back within normal limits, so even though I couldn't get information from the cardiologist, letting them know I was going to see my regular doc must have pushed their buttons to share my report in a timely way. He wasn't concerned about my kidney function and explained that for someone my age, those numbers were all within normal limits. I do need to add some iron to my vitamin and minerals each day, I have had to do that before, but generally it was either after a surgery or when I was pregnant. I guess that when you watch what you eat so carefully, it is hard to maintain some nutrients when you have my body. He also has referred me to a back pain clinic affiliated with his medical group. I will have to gather my records from the other guy and share them with them--but it will give me some fresh eyes to look at things.

IO ran into my pain doc at the hospital--I was there for a CT scan of my lungs and some more lab work and he also recommended another back doc for me. I am sure this guy is good, but he is part of the group I use and I want those fresh eyes on me. I am glad to know that there is a guy that is part of my ortho group who is "a great guy who goes to my church and leads boy scouts" that I have access to. My pain doc said he can also help me with a couple of other issues, so as soon as I am over pneumonia, I can move forward in dealing with my back. I wish that I could have gotten his help with this, but that saucy nurse in the pain clinic doesn't make it easy to have access to the one doc who will move mountains for patients. I think she hates the amount of work he sends her way or something.

I am glad to start to have some answers and I expect to get myself back. I always feel a bit foolish after there is a big reveal that I have been harboring some big health issue that I should have realized I had. However, when you deal with as many things as I do, it is easy to overlook some "discomfort" along the way. This may have been adding some to my back pain as well. things get a bit blurry for me.

On another note, I am not sure that I have shared that our home is out in the "country," far enough out of town to avoid a lot of traffic but close enough so that we can get to stores and services in a half an hour or so. We don't have access to many of the amenities that people in town have which include paid garbage pick up, city sewage and water, or buses other than school buses. It is a great area to be in and can be the best of all worlds, but there are times, like when the car is down, that it makes things a bit tricky too. The payback comes when the weather gets nice. We have a lot of space for a wonderful garden and six acres of land for our family to enjoy in so many ways. I am sure looking forward to spring!!

Gentle hugs,
Sylvia

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MTNGRL 2/21/2011 8:04PM

    Oh no, is there a rain cloud following you around? Pneumonia on top of everything else. You are a trooper! Please rest up and make time for you to heal. Hugs!

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SHELLPRO 2/20/2011 1:15AM

    Gosh Syl, can't we break one thing at a time just once? I feel for U and the Double Pneumonia, I remember my bout well. Spent a lot of time in a Rocking Chair and upside down trying to break it all out and stay hydrated. I was crying for days- thus the need for hydration. And I'd love to have the referral to fresh eyes too. Good luck and prayers are with U. emoticon

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MOLGRA2 2/19/2011 11:54PM

    Sylvia

Please do take some you time and concentrate on getting better. Pneumonia is nothing to play with! Hope you are up and at em soon!

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EMRANA 2/19/2011 11:37AM

  Wow, pneumonia is a more than just a discomfort! I hope you are feeling better soon. Definitely make sure you get some good rest in the next few days.

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