EMILYT92   2,924
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EMILYT92's Recent Blog Entries

Back... Again...

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Hey everyone,
I've had a very busy and interesting year. I've started seeing a therapist for depression, anxiety, and body image issues. After 4 months of therapy and little progress, I've just started medication. I have also started seeing a nutritionist who is helping me eat healthy the right way (mostly getting me to eat breakfast and up my protein intake in general) and I hope to be able to exercise soon, as I have avoided it this year for fear of people seeing/judging me during or after exercising. I hope with the medication I can obtain a normal sleep schedule since I have a terrible tendency to take an hour to fall asleep and then oversleep by many hours in the morning. I also hope I will cut down on emotional eating.

So I'm tackling this from a mental standpoint. I'm far from beating this, but it's a step in the right direction. I do still have a weight loss goal. I still need to change my way of thinking to accepting my current body and becoming fit because I'm worth it, because my current point of view is still that I'm unsatisfied with who I am. But I recognize that this needs to change.

I'm setting realistic, healthy goals, and I would love your support once again!

Emily

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WYOBZM 5/19/2012 1:04PM

    emoticon Sometimes the hardest part is just identifying issues. You are taking steps in the right direction! emoticon Finding a support system is very important too. I will keep checking with you. Feel free to send me an email if you do not want to post something on public. emoticon Hang in there and it is good to hear from you again!

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Unrealistic goal passed, realistic goal set 3/22/11

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Yes, I've been MIA for a while. College has been pretty demanding and on top of that, pledging the coed honors frat has taken up a HUGE amount of my time. I tell my friends that it's my hardest class! So my previous goal was to lose around 20 pounds by this week. yeah.... didn't happen. I had stopped losing weight soon after i got to college but I only gained 4 pounds back from my lowest weight. So right now I have about 15 pounds to lose and I'm redefining my goals. My last attempt was to lose 1.5 pounds per week. I found impossible to keep this pace at college where the only exercise I'm getting is walking to the frat house and to classes. Logging everything has been a big problem of mine as I usually find it rude to log what I ate at the table and it's quite time consuming. Still, I haven't been on my best behavior, my vegetable intake has been lacking and I've been eating too many carbs and too little protein.

But I've now realized that I can't keep yo-yoing like this. I'm setting a goal for 129 (the same weight but with more time to do it). Still, I want to resist slacking off. I want to lose 15 pounds by July 2nd, my Dad's birthday, because we will be celebrating it at a house we just bought in Florida with a pool and right by the beach. I just want to be comfortable in a bathing suit.

I've also realized that I've been missing a part of the equation. To be successful, I feel I can no longer avoid running. I think it will be the easiest form of exercise since I don't have a gym membership and it will be less time consuming than trying to walk off the weight. I just have to learn to LOVE it because I've always hated it. I know people who love to run and I've always thought to myself, "what is wrong with them?" but I feel I can benefit from running as good stress relief, and, during the summer, as a way to bond with my sister. Again, part of the problem is my fear of being judged as I'm always conscious of people judging me while I exercise. I don't know where this fear comes from but it's there and it's one of the main obstacles to getting to my goals. I'm going to try to get to the core of the problem so I can get rid of it.

Anyways, I'm back, but probably won't be logging consistently. I will try to make a weekly blog post which will probably be manageable. Well I gotta go but I'm looking forward to starting anew, and as cliche as I've made it sound, this time is different!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MZZCHIEF 5/17/2012 12:26PM

    Great that you have a house by the ocean WITH a pool... in Florida no less. Used to live there and loved it! Constantly threatening to move back, but I've grown fond of my corner of the universe.

About running... if you hate it because of how it makes your body feel (I've got scoliosis and just can't) you might want to try a milder form of it, like brisk walking. To increase your endurance, add a backpack with some books... hey that sounds like college... or light hand weights (a pound or less, be careful of your form or you can injure yourself).

As for performance anxiety due to the judgement of otthers... seriously? Please, girl!

This isn't a track meet.... girl no one really cares and if they do have something nasty to say, it just means they're insecure or have some sort of psychological problem!

So then the better question is... why do you care what insecure people think about YOU? Get out there and be yourself, no matter what other people think!

Thx for the friend add.
Adding you to mine.

: )
Mzzchief

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PWINCESSEMILY 3/23/2011 3:16PM

    Love the plan. Very sensible!

The runners I know all like to have a race in the pipeline to work towards. So maybe that would help?

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WYOBZM 3/22/2011 9:29PM

    emoticonPlan you have, and realistic too! If you get a chance read my blogs. I hated running when I first started it. That was 24 years ago. I thought runners were nuts. I became more nuts and have actually competed in 24 and 48 hour races! I even have run 100 mile trail races.

With that said, get at it girl so you can look good in Florida! Glad you are having fun in college. emoticon emoticon

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Just Desserts 2/1/11

Tuesday, February 01, 2011

February. The month of LOOOOVE... and groundhogs.
This month is going to test me. I am going to be very very busy but I need to still focus on my weight loss goals. Today was a good example. My friends all decided to get dessert for the table so they came back with various cakes and cookies and caramel for apples. I had one slice of apple dipped in the caramel and a small small forkful of carrot cake (my favorite!) When I got back to the dorm, everyone was complaining about how full they were and how they shouldn't have eaten it all. I snickered to myself.

This was a picture of the table. In the big bowl was two kinds of cake and on the plate was more cake and cookies. In the bowl in the foreground was caramel for the apples. I can't believe I resisted it all! I went back to the dorm, noticed I was pretty low on carbs so I had a delicious skinny cow and half a serving of tostitos.

Here's Today's Breakdown!
Calories: 1262
Carbs: 115
Protein: 90
Fat: 39
F/V Servings: 4 :(
Workout Minutes: 46
Steps*: 5442

Healthy Highlights:
-Resisted the sweets!
-slowly increasing my fiber intake
-Back to walking everywhere!

Naughty Moments:
-I did have a spoonful of regular ice cream earlier today. I sucked on a big chunk of the fudge and peanut butter mmm
-crab cake for part of dinner. oh well it fit in my budget!

Thanks for reading!!!
-Emily
*I track the steps I walk at a moderate pace because total steps is an underestimate because I don't keep the pedometer on my when I'm just walking down the hall or around the room

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PWINCESSEMILY 2/2/2011 4:21PM

    You're doing so good!! I think its good to have balance. I don't like to eat 'bad' foods every day because I try to maximise nutritional value for my calories, but now and then it is absolutely OK to work it into the plan and go away with no guilt. Especially when you're resisting so much yummyness!

Keep at it girl, you're doing great!

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WYOBZM 2/2/2011 8:19AM

    I loe skinny cow treats! YOU DID GREAT today! emoticon emoticon emoticon See, you can have some treats in moderation. You are on your way to a healthy but still happy lifestyle.

Enjoy you all day snow party. Keep it healthy.

emoticon

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APIRLRAIN888 2/1/2011 11:03PM

    lol as long as you own it, track it and burn it, you rock in my book! keep at it

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1-2-3 CHA CHA CHA! 1/31/11

Monday, January 31, 2011

So.... yeah. lots of weird guys at ballroom dance. We're currently recruiting some of our guy friends to lower the creepiness factor down to a manageable level. My roommates and I wore bright pink shirts with highlighter yellow undershirts. We had SO much fun! The instructor was really funny but for some reason we were the only ones to laugh at his jokes. We've created a name for us, he referred to us all as pink. Next week he requested that we be orange. Anyways, I thought it was not that intense of a workout, but it was good for my arms, having to hold them up constantly and I tried to keep my core tight as much as possible to give it a nice workout. My internship is interesting, but it's a desk job so not much action there! Things are getting better. I still have a sore thumb and am still quite phlegmy but at least my nose isn't runny.

Here's Today's Breakdown!
Calories: 1547 (three away from my limit! GRR)
Carbs: 219
Protein: 99
Fat: 32
F/V Servings: 3 (stoopid bag lunch pasta!)
Workout Minutes: 60 of actual dancing
Steps*: 3436 (it's progress!)

Healthy Highlights:
-I'm actually walking again and in a fitness class
-Apple with my breakfast :)

Naughty Moments:
-after fitness class we all had ice cream because we missed out on an ice cream social. I shouldn't have eaten it :(

Thanks so much for reading!
Emily

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WYOBZM 2/1/2011 8:12AM

    emoticon on the blog.

Check out Coach Nicole's desk workout and then you can sneak in a little workout during down time at the desk instead of playing solitaire. Glad you are having fun in college. I loved those years and all the naughty food moments too!

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APIRLRAIN888 2/1/2011 12:18AM

    awesome! keep it up

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The Recovery 1/30/11

Sunday, January 30, 2011

I'm feeling much better today and 80% less sore which is good because I have my first PE class, Ballroom dancing, tomorrow. My old PE didn't fit into my new schedule and I'm taking the new one with both of my roommates so it'll be fun! We have a contest on who can dance with the most cute guys during each class. teehehe! Today I ate too big of a breakfast because our dining hall had brunch and too much dessert! I've found that when I let myself have unhealthy foods, I won't stop until it's gone. So until I can learn to stop at enough, it's all or nothing. I'm fine with this, I've gotten along great without naughty foods for a while. It's just since I binged yesterday I felt like I was hooked! I'm still upset that I ate too much yesterday, I'm worried I've completely sabotaged my progress. Anyway, here's today's breakdown.

Calories: 1507
Carbs: 164
Protein: 103 (even without a shake!)
Fat: 59 (yikes!)
F/V Servings: 3 :(

Healthy Highlights:
-Lots of veggies for dinner but still not enough!
- Went shopping and got to stretch my legs in a nice long walk! I still can't do much aerobic exercise without coughing though.

Naughty Moments:
-Made reese's bars while I was making tomorrow's lunch and that's why I went over calories/fat. I would have been fine if i just stopped at dinner!


Thanks so much for reading!
~Emily

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WYOBZM 1/31/2011 6:29PM

    emoticon Glad to hear the soreness is almost gone. Next time you go to brunch, drink a few glasses of water before you go. You can still enjoy yourslef, but your tummy will feel full.

Have fun ballroom dancing. emoticon How do you judge a cute guy? Hope they show up and the class isn't full of just girls.

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