EMILYMAY  
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Why is this so hard?

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Why is it that I can't get myself to keep going?! I am finding success and seeing results and yet I have stopped working out and starting eating whatever and whenever. What is wrong with me?! I am so close to such a big goal of being under 200 for the first time in 7 or 8 years. There is something inside of me that doesn't want it...that fears it. Why would I be sabotaging myself? Why don't I want to lose this weight? I fear it for some reason...what is it? Being fat is my identity. It is how explain away every failure and ever rejection. It is the thing I beat myself up for the most. Its my excuse to hate myself. Why wouldn't I want to like myself? Why wouldn't I want to lose this weight and gain a whole new life. Do I fear the unknown of it? Who will I be? Where will I fit? What if ... ? I don't even know. I don't enjoy over eating. I end every meal and every day hating the choices I have made. My body deserves better. My husband deserves better. I know that I can do this. I know that my body can do this. I just fear the changes it will bring. I don't know what to say except that I want to get back in this game. I hope I can find my way back soon before I have undone all of my progress and hard work!

  


Week 18 Review

Thursday, March 13, 2008

I'm finally back under my February weight! I basically just lost an entire month being sick and all. I am trying not to be discouraged since I know that my eating wasn't the best this week. I am going to do better this week and count all of my food and eat healthy. I have only a couple more days until my next biggest loser week so I have to get ready for that! I want to be under 200 so badly! I also have 2 weeks until my measure/weigh in with my trainer and a revamp of my strength training. We shall see! Thanks for checking in!

  


I'm Doing It!

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

I knew these Biggest Loser goals were pretty high and lofty but I'm really doing it! Yesterday I reached my goal of 2 hours of cardio plus abs. I'm so proud of myself and am excited to keep it up! I am definitely getting my period so that would explain why my weight doesn't reflect all of my hard work. I'm sure though that soon enough my weight will catch up with me and I just might have a really big week. I wonder how they do it on the real Biggest Loser. Surely those girls get their periods, yet it doesn't seem to ever be reflected on the scales. Who knows- maybe it isn't as big of a factor as it seems to me to be right now. We'll see! I'm off to the gym for a super workout since I have 2 hours of cardio plus a strength training workout to do. Should be fun!

  


Biggest Loser Week 1

Monday, March 03, 2008

I've decided to alternate my normal workout weeks with what I am going to call Biggest Loser Weeks. On the normal weeks I will do 60 minutes of cardio 6 days a week and 3 strength workouts. On Biggest Loser Weeks I will do my normal workouts but will add an additional 60 minutes of cardio in the evenings 6 days per week. I will also add abs to the days I would normally only do cardio. I am hoping that this will help me catch up to my goals rather than having to change all of my goal dates. I'm already off to a poor start, however, since it is 7:30 pm on day one and I haven't been to the gym yet today. I can do this...right? Yes! I can do this! I'm off to the gym! I might not get in my 2 hours of cardio, but I will do something and that is better than just giving up for the day!

  


Week 15 Review

Thursday, February 28, 2008

I think I'm on week 15...? Anyway- I've been dreading writing this post. I have been back on track since Monday where I weighed in at 208.4 just a bit lower than my last weigh in weeks ago. I've been doing 60+ minutes of cardio each day and I've done one strength workout and still I've gained! My food has been good- I've been in all my goal ranges. The scale is at 210 and I'm not sure why. Maybe my period is coming? Who knows. Anyway- I have to report it even though I don't think the 'gain' is a result of any poor decisions on my part. I know I've done well and I am proud of getting back on track so there is no shame here. Looking forward to a good loss next week!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BGALUMNI 3/2/2008 4:02PM

    I understand that can be frustrating with the work that you are doing. Sometimes this happens and it is nothing to be concerned about. If you feel you have really hit a sticking point, try something new.

On the track, try doing a lap at a much higher pace, then walk or jog, or maybe sprint the corners and jog/walk the straight aways. Just have to do it for one or two workouts then go back to your normal workout.

Just jolt your system. Best of luck to you, I know it is hard. My wife has had to deal with the same thing, so I understand how frustrating it can be.

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JIBBIE49 2/28/2008 3:17PM

    You are the person
who has to decide
whether you will do it
or toss it aside

You are the person
who makes up
your mind
whether you will lead
or linger behind

Whether you"ll try
for a goal that is far
or be contented to stay
where you are

Take it or leave it,
there's something to do
just think it over----
It's all up to you !!!!


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