Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Yesterday was hard in many ways. The neighborhood last a very Important part! He helped My Sister and Mom out so many times. And His wife (who has had cancer and lost an arm) was there for us when Mom died! I had to go by My self. I did not know anyone there. And I thought I would get to see His Wife, but did not. It just opened up a lot of things. I am the oldest Daughter, I am a Sister, a Wife, a Mom and a GrandMa, a Friend. Who do I go to for help. I have My co-workers who try to support Me. But it is not the same. DH had had a really bad yesterday and I was happy to listen, but He did not want to listen to Me. I am tired of being the go to person, when I have no one to go to. I got out a T-shirt to wear today it has a beautiful bear with pink hat and pink flowers. It says Rosie Bear. Toward the last Mom did not really know me she called Me Rosie (why I may never know) but My sister made fun of Me and to this day now and then She calls Me Rosie. It hurts. I know in My heart She is not trying to be mean. I need to get back to doing My study work to get Myself in a better place. It is difficult to not be like Mom and take care of it and not complain. I am not a confrontational person. So I felt if I could write this to My Friends on Spark it might just help! I will get there I know because I am the Strong one. I just want to be weak now and then.
I did ride My exercise bike last night. And I am going to continue to do so. I need a healthy mind and a healthy body.
Thanks for listening!!!!!! I Love You All!!!!! Susan (Rosie)