Saturday, December 20, 2014
Is there something wrong with me? Is it unreasonable to get home at 7 pm and feel like I have time enough to barely eat, shower and go to bed? Is the 3 hours before bed time really not enough to find some relaxation?
What do you do? Bath? Wine?
I pretty much get home, clean a bit, take care of the pets, eat dinner, watch some TV and go to bed...but I never feel like I'm "unwinding" after a hard day. Should I start to meditate? Read more? What?
I'm going to try the wine idea...right now.
Tuesday, December 16, 2014
Even though I'm proud of a lot: 1) on Paleo again 2) hitting the gym 3) focusing on fitness...I'm remembering that when I "imagine" that I'm make serious changes and doing great, "reality" hits.
Here I am at our holiday work party. I cropped out the beer, lol...it was just taken as a joke after I donned the fake hair and elf hat from the elephant gift swap (or whatever that weird gift exchange thing is called). I'm not a crazy partier, I promise, lol!
So in my mind, I was wearing cute jeans with brown boots and cute navy sweater. I felt really good. Then I see this picture with the big belly and I remember that I have a long way to go before I reach my goal, even though I felt good that night.
This blog is not meant to be self-deprecating - it is simply meant as a reminder to stay on track. A lot of us do well for a bit and then tend to feel like we're doing enough and slowly that turns into stalling and not losing weight, never reaching our goal. I don't want that to happen this time.
I commented on my blog yesterday that until now it has been about getting to the gym. Now it has to be about ramping up my work out and basically MAKING IT COUNT. 8 weeks ago, I could barely get up in the morning and I could barely get through a work out. Both have become easy now. It is time to increase the difficulty when I'm at the gym.
Monday, December 15, 2014
Kinda bummed about it...our old instructor is gone. One minute she was there, the next...not. I'm actually pretty unhappy about how it went down - everyone else at the gym was just saying "She's tired", "She's out of town", until finally someone finally admitted she was gone. That's such B.S. I was not happy that they lied about it, but whatever. I'm there to lose weight and get fit, not get involved in the drama.
Well, we have a super nice, new kid doing our boot camp. He has a football background and it shows. We've had him 2-3 times now and we are getting FRUSTRATED. People are talking about leaving, branching off and doing our own boot camp, etc. Boot camp used to be a gut-busting, lung-bursting work out. Now, it's like Jazzercise at the old-age home. I used to hit 400-450 calories in 40 minutes. Now we're doing a full 60 minutes...today I got to 380. It is bogus and I'm not happy about it. We keep telling him to raise the bar and today we had a serious talk with him...I'll give it a few more times and if he's not getting it, I'll stop going. They're adding Tues/Thurs bootcamp and it's with an instructor that works us hard. I feel bad for the new kid, but we don't get to the gym at 5:45 am to stretch for 45 minutes and then do 10 minutes of sit ups and push ups.
We'll see what happens. I hope it works out because I've been loving the group aspect of it!
Sunday, December 14, 2014
So to start off this blog of Day 198, I went back to Day 1:
I was so optimistic about so much "newness" - my job, the gym, my plan to stay on track with 214 days left until the end of the year. 197 days later I can say that I spent the majority of the time not doing a whole lot, but I can proudly say that I really feel that I am now on track. I hate that it is almost the end of the year and YET AGAIN, I did not persevere to reach my goals. Despite the fact that the majority of the year has been a failure, I am currently:
1 - working out multiple to the majority of the days of the week - 3x boot camp at 5:45, 1x trainer session + as many more days of exercise as possible. I have to say that for now, it's been about getting to the gym. It is time to bump up the work outs and really push myself.
2 - I'm back on Paleo, it is day 12. I'm still cheating here and there (milk, some sugar) but I'm generally doing great and I've already lost 3.5 pounds since starting up again...that after GAINING weight over the last 6 months from trying to eat a balanced diet of carbs and protein, etc. It just doesn't work for me.
For me, the key is BALANCE. I've never had that: I either Spark like crazy but don't really change food or exercise, or I eat great but don't go to the gym, or I go to the gym but binge eat every night...I haven't found a way to bring the food, the fitness and the community together.
But I'm trying. I really am.
If anyone is on Instagram, feel free to "friend" me - I'm "eddymeese" there, as well. I'm finding it quite motivational!
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
So I'm feeling great about the gym, but the food is still an issue. I know what works for me and what I enjoy, it is just a matter of getting over the fact that I have to give up so much. But I will have so much to gain:
1) more energy
2) more weight loss
3) drop sizes
4) feel better about myself
In preparation for going primal/paleo again, I've downloaded Mark Sisson's Primal Blueprint to read. I want to go at it this time with a bit more knowledge backing me up. Dec. 1st is starting day.
Have a happy thanksgiving, everyone!
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