EBURGITE   68,348
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
EBURGITE's Recent Blog Entries


Tuesday, November 20, 2012

for decades, i've wanted that "norman rockwell" holiday....lots of family, great food, happy people, memory-making, laughter, sharing across the generations. i don't have that with my family, or my hubby's family, and it's not happening with the next generation, either, as they are too far away. the longing for what "could be" is a huge joy-stealer. so i'm just going to embrace my not-normal-ness, and start celebrating in ways that reflect who i am.
i'm excited about making new traditions that will bring love, laughter, and good memories! we'll see what we come up with.
wishing you all a holiday that brings you joy, however you choose to celebrate. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MAGA99 11/20/2012 2:29PM

    sometimes u have to look beyond wat u think the pic is

maybe that famly in the pic is more friends then families

may ur holidays b Blessed

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEIDLER721 11/20/2012 12:19PM

    I know the feeling. I try and make everything and event, and all i do is get frustrated that things are not "the way they are suppose to be" It took me a long time and I still have trouble, but just enjoy the moment, wherever you are and whoever your with. Have a Happy Holiday! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TXTOAD9970 11/20/2012 11:56AM

    you can still make memories with your hubby - enjoy your holiday with him emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment

looking for the right word......

Saturday, November 17, 2012

i just listened to a spark people radio episode...the host talked about "releasing" weight. i kinda like that. i don't like the term "losing" weight, because i haven't LOST anything....i've changed how i deal with food and exercise, and those behaviors have enabled me to DROP 105 lbs. i didn't misplace anything, and i don't want to find it. release is still is a bit passive for me, because this journey has been very active and extremely intentional...it's a day-by-day, sometimes minute-by-minute, choice-by-choice path. i'm still looking for the perfect word....release comes close, but it's just not the "one."
what word do you use to describe the changes in your life? emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SKINNIESOMEDAY 11/24/2012 11:15AM

    i too like the term shedding and I've heard people say they have "let go " of unwanted pounds. VERY interesting blog and I may keep this in mind when stating this in the future !

Report Inappropriate Comment
WORTHART 11/20/2012 1:16AM

    I like shedding! Every 7 years all your cells renew themselves so maybe that is what we are doing, renewing ourselves; shedding our skins for a new and fabulous self.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EBURGITE 11/18/2012 10:12PM

    love that--shedding & the thoughts behind it. thanks!

Report Inappropriate Comment

It was once a part of me, but I'm changing underneath... growing a new me from the inside out. So the outer layer has to slough off.
Great introspection exercise! Thanks for blogging that thought!
~ t.

Report Inappropriate Comment
-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 11/17/2012 7:48PM

    I haven't really thought about it...but, I found some words that you might consider:

k from
there's more...but, this is a start to consider. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAGA99 11/17/2012 12:11PM


Report Inappropriate Comment

best quote i've heard in a while

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

TORTISE110 posted a blog yesterday: http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_j
here's the quote: "When we force ourselves to connect against our heart's desires, we create false, resentful relationships; when we disconnect from the people who deplete us, we set them free to find their tribes while we find ours."
i just love that! thanks tortise

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THRIVE2DAY 11/15/2012 6:22AM

    So true.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PJBONARRIGO 11/14/2012 10:03PM

    Y emoticon ep, this is a keeper.

Report Inappropriate Comment

smaller size !?!?!?!

Monday, November 12, 2012

i needed to do some shopping for winter clothes. i've been having difficulty keeping my pants up, but i just blamed it on my "funnel" shape. i found out i needed a smaller size of jeans. i am beyond shocked--i don't think i've been in a size 10 since 1982 or 1983. i am shocked for a few reasons....first i never thought i'd fit into that size again. second because when i was a size 26, i thought a 14 would be grand, and lastly because even seeing myself in a size 10, i still am very unhappy with the reflection in the mirror. it's all further proof that this battle will likely rage in my head...probably for the rest of my life. but i will continue to learn and grow, get healthier, and find new ways to think about, and talk to, myself.
my weight hasn't really changed since june...i've been bouncing up and down in the 167-174 range, which puts me hanging out on the cusp of the overweight/obese dividing line. that number, and designation make me feel really fat. i know there are a few factors i have to keep in mind...i have always been structurally dense, i am very large-busted, and i am now pretty muscular. since my weight didn't change, i was surprised to learn my size had. as a teen/young adult, i was anorexic. all of my adult life, i've been overweight-obese. as i've been dropping weight, i have teetered on the edge of anorexia.
i've still got a ways to go! a number on a clothing tag or a scale isn't going to make anything magically different. i will always have to be careful about what i think, what i eat, and what i do.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THRIVE2DAY 11/13/2012 11:51AM


Report Inappropriate Comment
MAHGRET 11/13/2012 8:59AM

    Amazing! Keep up the good work. Maybe since you know you have the eating disorder issues, you need to concentrate on healthy and not the numbers? Is it possible you look fabulous and you just can't see it? Because size 10 is bound to look fabulous! Try to be kind to yourself.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BEEJAY49 11/13/2012 4:46AM

    You ARE doing great! Love yourself even if what you see in the mirror isn't what you think should be there. You are making wonderful progress if you're jeans are getting smaller. So many factors like you said contribute to the shape of our bodies. Keep moving forward and don't let the anorexia get hold of you again. Love you! HUGS!

Report Inappropriate Comment
WORTHART 11/12/2012 10:59PM

    Oh wow, a size 10! You are doing so well, especially as you also have to cope with anorexia issues. Before I joined SP my dream was to not have to obsess about food. Before I quit drinking I obsessed all the time about alcohol and after I quit it was such a relief to not have drinking on my mind 24/7, so I wanted that same relief when it came to food. But now I can see that food addiction is different and I will always have to be vigilant.

Report Inappropriate Comment

foundational article

Thursday, November 08, 2012


i just re-read this article. it pretty much sums up the changes i've made in the last 22 months. moderation. progress, not perfection. changing how i think about myself, food and exercise. realizing doing the same thing and expecting different results is insanity--i'm done with the crazy merry-go-round. emoticon realizing this is a moment-by-moment, baby steps kind of journey, slowly and consistently learning, and building a new life. when i fall down, i get back up, instead of berating myself and wallowing in the mud. i just move forward.
there are no quick fixes that worked for me, but little changes have added up to 105 lbs gone FOREVER. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BEEJAY49 11/10/2012 5:53AM

    Thank you for sharing that. :) You are doing wonderful! :) HUGS!

Report Inappropriate Comment
EBURGITE 11/9/2012 9:39AM

    thanks, guys.

Report Inappropriate Comment
WORTHART 11/9/2012 1:07AM

    Wow, that is a huge achievement! I hope one day I can say the same, although with my recent battle with sugar, I'm not making much progress. Thanks for leaving words of encouragement on my blog.

Report Inappropriate Comment
NWLIFESRC 11/8/2012 1:37PM


Report Inappropriate Comment
MAGGIEVAN 11/8/2012 1:23PM

    Great achievement. Congrats. Yes it is a great article.

Report Inappropriate Comment

First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 Last Page