Monday, May 10, 2010
My life has changed since I started looking in the mirror on 4/21/10 in the past few weeks I have made a lot of changes to be proud of.
1. I have choosen not to eat process foods (well as much as I can avoid them)
2. I have a new love for my Forman Grill, every day I love myself enough to cook my dinner and lunch for the next day. I make grilled vegetables which I am really loving, I donít just have to eat salads, grilled Portobello mushrooms, zucchini, yellow squash, asparagus, grilled sweet and regular potatoes and my newest find was Eggplant. I grill my proteins-fish, chicken, beef and or pork. I even grilled pineapple and mango and it was great.
3. I exercise with Richard Simmonís dvd-sit tight (I tore a tendon in my ankle while hiking)Ö
4. I journal my thoughts-prime example was I had a bad day yesterday and instead of eating I wrote what bothered me the lack of control over certain situations. I didnít eat!.
5. I track all of my food daily and maintain an average of 1400-1500 per day.
6. Drinking 8-12 cups of water daily
7. I measure all my foods and got a portion plate from TOPS and am actually using it.
8. I tell myself each day I love myself! It isnít lame anymore. Itís about a great attitude about me.
9. I cut back the soda pop to just a few days as a treat and now only drink a few ounces vs. a few bottles at a time. I no long crave it.
10. My blood sugar readings were at 166 -242 they are now 100-130 in the past 3 weeks
So in the past 3 weeks I have changed quite a bit and found it isnít hard, I found time to make me the priority and to use my love of cooking to cook for myself because I am worth it.
I have gone out for dinner with friends-I picked the restaurant and we ate at Applebeeís and I tried their tilapia Ė I had never had it, now I grill it home because I liked it.
That one simple homework from TOPS made me really look deep inside. I really feel I can do this, I hope to continue to write you with my status if it is okay and let you know how I am doing, I will finish this and continue my life change. Itís all about the portions, exercise and attitude!
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail. I will not do this. I will love myself enough each day to plan my meals and exercise!
I have lost 14# to date!
Monday, April 26, 2010
Boy did i do some major planning! I pretty much spend the last two days batch cooking, I did manage to get other things done but got cooking done.
I made some minestrone soup loaded it with veggies and then added meatball (frozen). It was my lunch on Sunday and then I divided the left overs into 4 1 cup servings. I put one in the fridge for my lunch today and then the others in the freezer for future lunch or dinners. ;) I got cabbage (slawmix) at the grocery store and lettuce and mixed it for some nice pita chicken pocket sandwiches. I grilled up chicken tenders (1oz each) and froze those as well. I love my Forman Grill. I made a spaghetti meat/veggie sauce (carrots, zuchini, mushrooms & lean ground). Now all i have to do is cook up some whole wheat pasta and serve it with a salad.
I am proud of myself cuz i managed to make some things ahead a time which means i am thinking of myself.
Monday: Grilled Chicken Dinner Salad with lite dressing & Roll
Tueday: Spaghetti and veggie meatsauce & salad w/lite dressing
Wednesday: Pepper Beef Steak with onions, Roasted Zucchini & Brown Rice.
Thursday: Pasta Surprize (grilled veggies & chicken) with a side salad with a balsamic vinergarette.
Friday: Chicago Style Hot Dogs, Homemade lite slaw and baked jojo potato wedges.
Saturday: Cheese & Chicken Enchiladas (2) with a side salad with salsa (pico de gallo)
I also found Jello Sugar Free Cheesecake pudding is bomb, i made a parfait using frozen blueberries and granola. about 130 cals for dessert it really was great.
When I shooped i spend less this past weekend. I got some prepped items like the Frozen meatballs, canned sauces and same jello puddings and gelatin. I shopped around the outside parameter of the grocery store. then hand picked the stuff in the middle. I use the semi home made mentality.
Well i feel proud of myself for caring to sit down and plan my menues, shop around those menues then cook the things i could ahead of time to cut time.
I am getting ready to to go camping for Memorial day weekend and I have the honors to plan our meals, yes we will still have some of our favs in moderation, but there will be more salads because we can grill our meats, fish & poultry. You know a hamburger patty can still make a good salad :) I just cut it up and add it to my meal and use some thousdand island lite dressing makes for a nice big mac without the calories ;) I am substituting buns for whole wheat buns and leaner meats.
I am really focusing on myself because i have to. No one can do this but myself and i have the tools around me. There is so much all over the place, recipes on line, support groups and of course me myself and I.
I planned to succeed I know I will have a loss this week because I planned!!!!
Thursday, April 22, 2010
This past week for my TOPS group I had to do some homework. I had to look at myself in the mirror each day and tell myself I LOVE YOU. Well at first I thought this was cheesy and well I really couldnít stand to look at myself in the mirror. I could see the reality of where my life had brought me with my food choices and lack of exercise. I realized that I have a choice to make daily; I can make them be healthy or unhealthy. If I chose unhealthy then I must live with my consequences at the scale, my health and relationships (yes it effects that too). I realized that my weight loss problem ties into so many other aspects of my life such as finances and household.
I find that when I am in not in control other things get lost as well. I canít get lost and stay lost. I canít fear failure or success. I have to stop sabotaging myself when things get good. I have to allow myself that feeling of goodness and that I deserve that feeling, that I donít have to cause myself grief to punish myself for the good I have done when I lose weight. I am worth this effort, sometimes I feel like a professional dieter. I know what do to I have all the tools and then some and I have the friends and family that support me. I really need to carry the motivation I feel when I go to my TOPS meeting or see at the scale to continue to do for myself. I know this can be done Iíve done it before I got as low as 240# 16 years ago and let it all go to crap because of two event in my life. I have to find a way to let it go because those events are what make me fear the success I felt for that time. One was a promotion that was given to me was taken away when a new owner came into play, I lacked a degree and he felt that he didnít have time for me to learn the ropes to manage so I was asked to step down. The other was same thing I lost and got back to 240 because I prepared to go Europe with my best friend. He then got a promotion and cancelled the trip. I was really hurt both times and since then have struggled to put the effort into myself. I have built this major wall around me, which only hurts me. So in both circumstances they where things that I lost control in what the outcome was at that moment in time, writing this right now it sounds lame. I got off my butt and went back to school and am now in a job I love. As for the trip, Europe will always be there and I can go with my hubby now. Okay so how do I get passed this feeling, are they excuses? Do I need to get honest with the feelings I battle with? I have to do something so that I can stay in control and not stall my weight loss journey. I have to stop feeding my emotions and instead of feeding it food finding another outlet like exercise or scrapbooking. I have to remember everything day that I am worth it. The other part of my home was to come up with 5 things that I love about myself, so if looking at the mirror was hard; coming up with 5 positives was even harder but I did and here they are:
I realized that my fear is hindering me from succeeding in many aspects of my life so I have to kick it in the ass and move on. There is actually a name for my fear of failure - Atychiphobia. This phobia keeps us from trying an activity we want to try. Causes of these phobia stems from links from early in life experiences which make sense and the solution or treatment is to write them down and face them as you go do not procrastinate. Do one at a time and battle the fear!!! Start with Excuses :)
Hmmm so this made me think, so one thing I know is that I am mad at my dad for not being in my life, I always thought it was something I had done. I know now that he had a problem and that was drinking I never knew how bad it was until he died almost two years ago, he was found dead in his van in a parking lot. My step mom told me he battled with it daily and she also told me he loved me, which was hard to believe. Part of me gets it the other is pissed off that he chose a bottle over spending time with me. I never got to tell him that. So maybe that will be something I will have to journal about; write him a letter and just get those feelings out. I have no other way of getting it off my chest.
Boy this is making me open my eyes and mind. Maybe this little homework made me think more than I thought. So looking in the mirror is a good thing when I see myself deep inside vs. the outside. Maybe this exercise was indented for me to look inside and help pull out what is ailing and keeping me from succeeding. I have to face the fears I need to tackle them in order to succeed. I really donít want to stay where I am at anymore. I have to stop being a professional dieter because this isnít a diet but a life time commitment to me. I have to be my own lover and believer of me. So tonight the heart I drew on the mirror will be bigger in that heart I will write down the 5 things that are great about me and then will write I love you where I can see it everyone morning as I get ready. I will SAY IT!! I will not just say it I will follow it with actions. I will plan to succeed and not to fail. I know I can!
Wednesday, April 07, 2010
I starting walking the steps at work every hour. I sit all day and was reading an article that just moving 5 mins each hour will help your metoblism. So no coach potating at work either. This done time 8 hours is 40 mins of exercise plus my workouts. an easy and managable way to get my burn in. I am going for it.
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