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The "Middle Wife"

Saturday, September 10, 2011

The following came in my email today. I don't think I'll ever forget this one!


The 'Middle Wife' by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher



I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.

When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater.

She holds up a snapshot of an infant. 'This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday.'

'First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.'

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement.

'Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. 'She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.)

'My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this.' (Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.)

'And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!' (This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!)

'Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe. They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom's play-center, (placenta) so there must be a lot of toys inside there. When he got out, the middle wife spanked him for crawling up in there.'

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat. I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another 'Middle Wife' comes along.

Now you have two choices...laugh and close this page or pass this along to someone else to spread the laughs. I know what I did!!!

Live every day as if it is your LAST chance to make someone happy!



  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COMPUCATHY 9/23/2011 8:34PM

    Hi-larious! I shared it with my husband. He loved it! Thanks for the chuckle! Keep up the good work! Thanks for the encouragement! Spark on! emoticon

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YIGOBUTTERFLY 9/16/2011 4:50PM

    I have seen this before and enjoyed it both times! Thank you for sharing.

Jane on Guam

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GOATGIRLJM 9/16/2011 11:33AM

    emoticon

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GOATGIRLJM 9/16/2011 11:27AM

    Kids can b sooo cute.

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GRANDMABABA 9/10/2011 4:20PM

    So cute!

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DUSTYPRAIRIE 9/10/2011 1:01PM

    What kicks me is so many of us adults are "visual" as opposed to technical. I'm so glad y'all enjoyed it.

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 9/10/2011 12:33PM

    AWESOME story!!! Thanks for sharing it!! Again, you just never know what a child will say but you can bet it will be their honest version!!!
Hugs,
Helen

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LOVETOLAUGH56 9/10/2011 11:02AM

    Wow, that was so cute. Thanks for posting this. I needed a good laugh.
Karen

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PRECIOUSMAZIE 9/10/2011 10:26AM

    In honor of this story and the last comment "Live everyday as if its your last chance to make someone happy." I would like to add this little story that came in my email.

A couple of senior couples were strolling along, wives in front, and husbands in back chatting. Bernie turns to Marv
and says, "Ya know, we went to a new restaurant last night and had the best meal ever. Great prices, too."
Marv smiles and says, "Well, we like to eat out too. So what was the name of this fine new eatery?"
Bernie says, "You're going to have to help me out here a little. What's the name of that pretty flower, smells sweet,
often red, grows on a thorny bush?"
Marv grins again, "Well now, Bernie, sounds like a rose to me."
"Yes, yes, that's it!" cries Bernie, and then he calls ahead to his wife.
"Rose! Rose, honey, what was the name of that little restaurant we ate at last night?"

Also have a look at this website this was so popular that it crashed their site. http://www.win7news.net/N14Z2N/1108
18-Fish The last few seconds in my opinion are the best.

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NDTEACHER1 9/10/2011 9:59AM

    Oh, my goodness! I could see some of my students doing this.

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The "Middle Wife"

Saturday, September 10, 2011

The following came in my email today. I don't think I'll ever forget this one!


The 'Middle Wife' by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher



I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.

When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater.

She holds up a snapshot of an infant. 'This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday.'

'First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.'

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement.

'Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. 'She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.)

'My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this.' (Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.)

'And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!' (This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!)

'Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe. They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom's play-center, (placenta) so there must be a lot of toys inside there. When he got out, the middle wife spanked him for crawling up in there.'

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat. I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another 'Middle Wife' comes along.

Now you have two choices...laugh and close this page or pass this along to someone else to spread the laughs. I know what I did!!!

Live every day as if it is your LAST chance to make someone happy!



  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CATHYGETSFIT 9/20/2011 6:22PM

    hahahaha That was hysterical! Loved it!! emoticon emoticon

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DUSTYPRAIRIE 9/12/2011 1:20PM

    Thank you all. Glad I got to brighten your day!

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CHLOESUE 9/10/2011 2:25PM

    I loved it.Thanks for sharing!

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GEEKSMEGGLY 9/10/2011 10:32AM

    emoticon emoticon

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AMANDAMUGNSTIK 9/10/2011 10:01AM

    Loved it!

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ATLHOTTIE 9/10/2011 9:55AM

    emoticon

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A Fresh Start with a Wonderful Buddy

Tuesday, September 06, 2011

I have an accountability buddy. Honestly, if it weren't for her this day would have gone out the window. I"ve had heatlthy meals and snacks and am getting ready for a bit of exercise. My heart isn't in this, I must admit, but like someone told me, it's about putting one foot in front of the other.

Tomorrow will get easier. I get to go shopping for my produce. My meals for the next week are planned around that. The yuck part - I have to go get a new ID card made. Mine is about to expire. I guess that will be my "fat" picture that I have to carry around with me. There's a reason for everything.

Hugs to all of you who believe in me when it's all I can do to believe in myself.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GOATGIRLJM 9/26/2011 12:12AM

    U r doing so great! Each good choice that u make changes your health and one good choice leads to another!

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CATHYGETSFIT 9/20/2011 6:18PM

    We all have days like that Deborah!! Even people who don't have medical problems. I'm glad you have someone who can / will keep you accountable. DH and I exercise together part of the week. I think I'm the only one really who holds me accountable. lol Just remember that this isn't a race. Taking baby steps towards your goal will help to ensure that this will stick with you for the rest of your life!! I don't think I look any different in any of my pictures even after losing weight. But then I suppose I am harder on myself. :)

Big Hugs across the miles my dear friend!!
Cathy

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CHLOESUE 9/8/2011 9:34AM

    It's now 2 days later.Hope you have had two good days.It gets better and easier as the days go by.How are you doing? Hope the ID picture wasn't too painful for you.My driver's license was renewed last year with a new picture.I am happy to say that my picture would look better today after an almost 25 pound weight loss this year.I want you to enjoy that feeling too.

emoticon emoticon

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 9/7/2011 8:05PM

    So glad you have an accountability buddy to help you stay on track and keep moving. AWESOME!!!

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SACOST 9/7/2011 4:24PM

    emoticon I know you can.

emoticon that you have an accountability buddy to keep you focused.

emoticon you will reach your goals.

emoticon Sue

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SPEEDY143 9/7/2011 3:52PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticonfor emoticon

emoticonLinda

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LABRYANT 9/7/2011 12:24PM

    It's never too late to start your day over! :D
emoticon
L.

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PRECIOUSMAZIE 9/7/2011 9:54AM

    I have so many days that are like that. I read in the Spark that when you take a step backwards take two forwards. And since I seem to take a lot of backwards steps lately it was good advice for me. I like your attitude. "just put one foot in front of the other." Not everyday feels good while in it but you can look back at see that you did make progress!

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ISPARKLE4YOU 9/6/2011 6:31PM

    You're going to do awesome! I just took some time yesterday to make a meal plan for the week- talk about planning! It's crazy how much time it takes! I'm glad you have an accountability partner- I do too, she's also my running buddy- and she has made a WORLD of difference! I also work with her, so I have to make sure I take healthy lunches and don't eat fast food too much! Lol..
Good luck!
M

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An Anniversary Celebration

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Over the next few days hubby and I will be celebrating our 19th wedding anniversary. Every bite of decadent food I taste (hubby is in charge of selecting the restaurants) I'm going to be snubbing my nose at the people who said we wouldn't last a year.

I will be so off track! It's ok. Everyone needs a little splurge time. I may regret it - my body has become used to the healthier side of meals and snacks. But tracking is out of the question.

I will be getting exercise. The little town we'll be in is full of steep hills to walk and trails to hike. In fact, the hotel is up narrow stairs, so just getting to our room will be a workout. Especially carrying our luggage, etc.

See you once I get back!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHLOESUE 9/8/2011 9:38AM

    Congratulations on your 19th wedding anniversary.Hope it was a very special time together with your husband. emoticon

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REBELBLITZ 9/3/2011 5:34PM

    Happy anniversary! Have a great time and laugh a lot and enjoy happy times.

Cheryl

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JOANNS4 9/3/2011 6:53AM

    Happy Anniversary. Enjoy yourself and the special time your have together.
emoticon

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SPEEDY143 9/2/2011 2:37PM

    emoticon emoticontime sure does fly... glad you are still on your honeymoon emoticonI'm sure you'll get plenty of exercise so you'll need to fuel the passion emoticonENJOY!!!!!

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WAVE1946 8/30/2011 6:56PM

    Congradulations... Have a great time and eat as you like. Just have fun and smile at each other a lot~~~
Nick
emoticon

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SMIDGON 8/30/2011 6:11PM

    When is your ann.? 19 years, did you say?

Sept 01 we will be married 49 years. After 3 kids, 5 grandchildren, I can snub people also. Most people said we'd never make it. We were and still are completely different.

God Bless You Both and many more.

Blessings,
Janet>
~+~

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ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 8/30/2011 5:37PM

    Congratulations on a wonderful and auspicious occasion!

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The Newest Exercise Craze is Sure to be....

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Standing in front of a wind machine. Like the idiotic weathermen do while a hurricane is bearing down on them. Only, you don't get to have the sand splintering away at your face. Maybe as you get good at holding your balance you'll get to get to stand in sand while a wave comes at you. Forget the undertow. You're sure to be safe.

It's got to take strength to try to stand up for even a few minutes at a time as they prepare for their time on the air. It's got to take strength to try to maintain a happy enough attitude under those conditions. It's got to take strength to act the hero.

Entrepreneurs out there - here's your chance!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MCJULIEO 8/30/2011 12:29PM

    You know, you may HAVE something there! (I'd rather deal with a wind machine, than with an undertow!) emoticon

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MOMMA_BEAR_69 8/28/2011 6:37PM

    Great blog!!! Are the entrepreneurs standing in line waiting for their chances?

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