DTYUNGU   11,565
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Freeloading Family

Thursday, January 02, 2014

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Today I am getting back on track with sparkpeople and healthy lifestyle. The holidays was a quick break for me.

Stressful eating has become something that I do more and more often recently. I hope to break that habit as quickly as it started. I am struggling with family members who are freeloaders. My father and my sister. (more my father) I am moving away soon and I am hoping to get some advice about what to do about people who seem to always be on the look out for a hand-out?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINTPICKER 1/2/2014 9:13AM

    Sorry to hear about family troubles. Perhaps your move will resolve some of these issues.

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My Sister Hates Me

Wednesday, September 04, 2013


This is my sister and I last summer enjoying a day at a nearby amusement park. We are smiling into my phone from the top of a ferris wheel. I remember having mixed feelings that day. I took us to this place partially expecting that the childhood memories that we created there would resurface and we might be able to rekindle the happy feelings created in childhood. I was wrong of course. I felt that the entire day was filled with fake smiles underhanded comments.

When did she start to hate me? I wish I knew. She was distant in high school and acted as though she missed me when I would come home from college but in all honesty I am not sure she ever did. She says she loves me, well she used to say she loves me, I haven't heard that in what seems like forever.

It seems like the more weight I lose, the more I succeed, the more I try to help her = the more she hates me. Is hate too strong of a word? Maybe... but she treats me worse than any enemy I've ever had. The truth is that my sister does not take care of herself and she may not love herself so how can I expect her to love me?

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I recently helped her fund a new car. I recently loaned her cash for new clothes. Within 25 minutes of both of these gestures she somehow managed to blurt out that she hated me. 'I hate you' hearing those words from her cut me like a knife across my abdomen and those words said because she did not like something mundane inside my car.

We live together currently and she has 3 dogs. Her dogs are not trained and she refuses to allow me to crate them so that they will learn not to make a mess in the house. emoticon I have tried so hard to help to discuss the situation with her nicely but she just does not care about what I have to say. I am so close to throwing my hands up and leaving the situation as soon as possible. I know that running away is not the right thing to do. It wont solve anything, it wont help her and it wont help me. But at least when I am far from her I don't feel her hatred fumes spewing in under my bedroom door.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HAMMA27 10/15/2013 1:53AM

  of course she doesn't hate you !!! She might be just jealous , that's human nature ! she does love you , but maybe feels bad about her self , you should try to help her out , maybe go in a little 1-1 vacation . We do things for our blood ! thats why we re called one family!

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7WORSHIPS 9/8/2013 8:58AM

  emoticon to read about your living situation. This is not living. Consider getting a new roommate.

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RITAROSE 9/8/2013 7:48AM

  This is no way to live, find a new situation without your sister. Then you can try to work out why she hates you. I think what other have said about her being jealous is right on. Please don't enable her by giving her more money. Praying for you to have the strength to do what has to be done. It won't be easy, but it's the start of recovering from a very trying situation. emoticon

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RED_DEVIL_APRIL 9/5/2013 3:00AM

    Living with someone who is hateful can be difficult. If she won't make your living environment liveable then you need to leave. Only she can help herself and your only enabling her by allowing it to go on. For your own health & sanity get away. Maybe.then she will see a need & desire to change herself.

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THOMS1 9/4/2013 5:29PM

    Time to change roommates sister or not. Your sister will do fine on her own and may even learn to appreciate you. She needs to find her own way. emoticon

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TRENTDREAMER 9/4/2013 3:58PM

    emoticon

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NOCALORIES 9/4/2013 3:40PM

    Love yourself! You are a wonderful person acknowledge it. Keep blogging and letting the true you shine. Live today with joy in your heart because your Spark friends love you.

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GODDREAMDIVA1 9/4/2013 3:28PM

    emoticon

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LOFLLAMA 9/4/2013 3:24PM

    Just because someone is family does not give them the right to abuse you. Pack your things, tell her you love her & say goodbye. I have 2 mean hateful sisters who do NOT accept me for who I am. That's okay! I have MANY people in my life (INCLUDING ME) who love me exactly as I am. You are great & you deserve to be treated as such!
I LOVE YOU!
Lisa

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PICKIE98 9/4/2013 3:19PM

    the truth? Your sister is so jealous of you, she could spit! I do not know if she is older or younger than you are, BUT she is spoiled and jealous. You have $$, a job, looks, beautiful hair, teeth, etc. You are changing by losing weight.
You need to set boundaries with this person, stop enabling her to treat you like dirt. Would you allow me to treat you that way?
She is emotionally, verbally abusive.
Now, fast forward, replace the word her with HE and that may be your husband/ boyfriend that you allow to treat you this way.
telling you she hates you is designed to keep you down, and keep her in control, a bully...
You have allowed her to step on you, abuse you, you need to stand up for yourself and say NO to some things. like her mouth and those poor dogs that have no discipline either.

Maybe if you DID look for another place, she might start thinking.. Stand your ground and never stop going for your goals...

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RED_DEVIL_APRIL 9/4/2013 3:02PM

    Living with someone who is hateful can be difficult. If she won't make your living environment liveable then you need to leave. Only she can help herself and your only enabling her by allowing it to go on. For your own health & sanity get away. Maybe.then she will see a need & desire to change herself.

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10lbs for Jamaica

Friday, March 22, 2013

My best friend promised to gift me with an all expensive paid trip to Jamaica if I could lose 10lbs before June 15. My goal of course is to lose 20 or more. I have 83 days in which to do it. This is the perfect time and the perfect motivation to really get myself in gear because I would love to wear my first bikini on the beach after being successful with my weightloss finally!

I feel that for the past year I have been extremely happy with where my weight has gone. I am not at a very comfortable weight but I am not yet where I want to be. I want to be physically fit and love the body that I see in the mirror. emoticon

Today TGIF sabotaged my life. I sat down and ordered a black bean burger. It was huge of course so I only ate burger and top bun, mayo off to the side. went back later to log the food and found out that the black bean burger is 1190 calories! even with the parts that I took off... can anyone say REDICULOUS!? ugh emoticon with that kind of calorie intake I should have just ordered the pasta and whiskey cake!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OAKLEYAJ 3/26/2013 5:02AM

    emoticon

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THOMS1 3/22/2013 10:32PM

    Wow! Congrats on maybe getting your free trip to Jamica. You can do it! emoticon

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MICHELLE2343 3/22/2013 9:08PM

    Wow! I wish a friend of mine would promise me a trip to Jamaica. :) That is going to be quite the reward when you reach your goal. I know what you mean about eating something that you think is healthy and then you log in to the nutrition tracker and find out how many calories and fat were really in it. I try to go online to a restaurants menu and look at nutrition facts and then choose the best option. Of course I don't always have time to look something up especially if it is a last minute decision. Keep working towards your goal though.

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LESLIE2561 3/22/2013 9:03PM

    Doesn't it suck when you think you are trying to make the right choices and then find out that restaurants seem to pull imaginary calories from outer-space to add to their foods. I had the same experience with Applebee's Tequila Lime Chicken even after I substituted steamed veggies for the rice pilaf. emoticon
P.S. Where can I find a friend like yours? The most my friends ever offer is to have me over for dinner.

Comment edited on: 3/22/2013 9:08:01 PM

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8MORE2GO1 3/22/2013 8:57PM

    I hate I eat something and find out later it is loaded with calories! Good luck on the 10 lbs!

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DANYLEIN 3/22/2013 8:56PM

    Where did you get the caloric info? Could it be incorrect? It sounds awfully high.
You CAN lose those 10 pounds. Jamaica? YES!

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Plateau over!??

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

These past few weeks have been difficult trying to figure out why I stopped losing even though I was doing everything right... well almost everything right.

I decided to change up one thing after reading an article about the importance eating enough good stuff. I wasnt eating ENOUGH!??? well okay whatever... so i have increased my calories to 1700-1800 per day (focusing very hard on the good stuff- fruits, veggies, good carbs, and protein) ... i can see a difference already :) the scale FINALLY moved for me today.

1.8lbs down since the start of the plateau 3 weeks ago! wooo whooo

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

~INDYGIRL 9/10/2012 8:18PM

    Woohoo!

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NOCALORIES 8/28/2012 7:53PM

    Thank you for sharing this blog and the great news of the scale moving down. You are a wonderful motivator. Keep doing what works. Looking forward to more good news.

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MJ7DM33 8/28/2012 12:42PM

  emoticon

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WAVAIRENE 8/28/2012 12:40PM

    That's wonderful! I'm happy for you. It's so frustrating when the plateaus hit.

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FEMISLIM 8/28/2012 12:34PM

    Good news indeed. Keep it up!!!!

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My scale wont move!!!

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Does anyone have any tips for me? I feel as though Im in a rut! Whenever I step on the scale 190-193 is all i see! and its been like that for WEEKS!

I am exercising 6/7 days my diet is not perfect but i work hard not to exceed calories!

TIPS wanted! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PRESBESS 8/19/2012 9:44PM

    Keep doing all the right things. Keep exercising for sure. Are you tracking absolutely everything you eat? That is sooo key. Are you eating balanced?

Most of all... keep at it. The scale will move.
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DTYUNGU 8/19/2012 8:32PM

    all tips are awesome!

i am review my calorie intake and I think that may be where the problem lies.. ihave been exercising ALOT and not eating enough or spending calories on good food...

this month i will really concentrate on nutrition

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SHORTTOOTH1 8/19/2012 5:26PM

    Have you taken measurements lately? I just went through a similar situation but got out of that mental space when I realized how many inches disappeared. Could be you are just gaining muscle. Hang in there!

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MSGO72 8/19/2012 5:11PM

  Make sure you are hydrated properly and that you are consuming enough calories. I agree with Nutty don't obsess and it might be time shake things up. emoticon

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NUTTYNERDGIRL 8/19/2012 4:51PM

    Don't obsess about numbers. Do you feel better? Healthier? Is your energy up? These are the important questions.

Also, changing up your routine, food, exercises, frequency - all of that can help "shake your body up" when it's plateauing. As long as you're feeling continuing to improve your health, that's what matters.

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