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A NEW DANCE......A NEW DAY!Wednesday, March 17, 2010
“I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to to dance better than myself.” ![]()
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WOODSYGIRL
3/19/2010 1:59PM
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You can do this dear one! You have soooooo much going on in your life right now, but you are making a plan, which will give you good focus and reward when you accomplish the tasks you set out to do. And we will all be dancing right along with you! xoxo Report Inappropriate Comment |


MJMEISSN
3/19/2010 12:53PM
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You go girl! You have overcome the hardest part - recognizing and admitting the issue. You have the determination to succeed, and will!
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SMILINGEYES2
3/18/2010 12:36PM
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GUCCIBEAR
3/18/2010 9:34AM
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Sometimes we just have to put ourselves first - it's not a bad thing, but sooo hard to do. Good thoughts coming your way - I know you will do it!
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SI1V3RBACK
3/18/2010 4:45AM
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Reality isn't everything it's cracked up to be! I wouldn't rush that weigh scale or at least feel the need to report the results if you plan to get crack that whip and get back on track. The threat of the weight scale can be as effective as the weight scale itself The most positive side of this is we will see your Sparkin' self a little more often *whee* Report Inappropriate Comment |


FINEARSESOON
3/18/2010 1:07AM
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Yep...we can never give up! especially at out age.. :-) Just gotta get back on track. There will always be that 'thing' that we allow to get in the way...I'm so sorry to hear it involves your Mom! Such a life changing event I know. But you'll feel better equipped to handle it if you feel good...so you go girl. Be there and be strong for yourself, and your Mom! Report Inappropriate Comment |


CWYNN01
3/17/2010 5:19PM
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The key thing is your back now & you are focused on making it happen!! So just keep on pushing!!!
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PATTYSH
3/17/2010 5:02PM
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Yep, we all have that "other voice" that says we can eat it or go ahead and skip that class. You'll get it back together. I know you will. Speaking of which---I'm off to a yoga class! Namaste, my friend! Patty Report Inappropriate Comment |


LINDA25427
3/17/2010 4:17PM
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Mary Ann you will always be my inspiration no matter what, you will have those pounds back off in no time . Happy St. Patrick's Day Report Inappropriate Comment |


DEBBIEANNE1124
3/17/2010 2:51PM
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Way to go, Mary Ann! dance! dance! dance!! Report Inappropriate Comment |


LIQUID11
3/17/2010 2:28PM
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Please do not limit your carbs below 120 g per day!! It is unhealthy and most of all you'll sooner or later get a B-complex vitamins deficiency, rather unwise, especially during the stressful situation you are experiencing, as they help your mood be in good shape. I would suggest you to opt for 140-150 g and also to consume some pieces of the best dark 70%+ you can get, it does miracles for the neurotransmitters of the brain! [No milk at the same time, it counteracts the anti-oxidative effect of the thing] Andreas Report Inappropriate Comment |


ETWBOK
3/17/2010 2:17PM
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AMEN SISTA!
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LIVE2RUN4LIFE
3/17/2010 2:11PM
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DACIUS
3/17/2010 1:44PM
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I am in complete agreement with #2. I eat way too many!!! LOL!!! Your plan sounds awesome and I am positive you will rock it out. Don't stress about those pounds. Just be healthy for yourself and those around you and the weight will take care of itself. Report Inappropriate Comment |


As most of my Sparkfriends know, my Mother was recently diagnosed with terminal colon cancer. She will be 87 in May. I won't go into what a brave, graceful, loving person she is here, but she is amazing all who know her, because her positive attitude and beautiful smile is still in tact. She has not shed a tear and is grateful for all the happy years she's had. At first, I awoke in the night in terror of what lie ahead. Crying in the night and not sleeping was not what I wanted to do, but it was beyond my control. But we got up every morning and headed to a Dr.'s appointment for radiation, blood work, or other procedure every single day (sometimes three appointments in one day!). My wonderful husband of 43 years drove...Dad with his thermos of coffee I prepared for him next to him, Mom and I all cuddled in the back seat holding hands in an afghan I had knitted for her about 20 years ago. We did what we could do to keep her from almost immediate paralysis and now she has decided not to have surgery or opt for chemotherapy as her cancer has mastastasized to her liver, bones, breast and thyroid. Very serious.....scary.....devastating and every other horrendous adjective you could exclaim. But now....we have our routine. We are accepting her fate....resigned to do what we can as cheerfully as we can. Putting a smile on our faces and being optimistic is not always easy, but we're trying. I remember my parents dancing in the kitchen to all those country singers such as Patsy Cline and Hank Sr. We put those records on and they take us back to those days. It's the cherished memories that keep us all going some days...and give us peace.
My father is 86 and our family is all pitching in to give him time to himself. Going to the store, taking a walk helps him so much. He has surely stepped up and is taking such good care of her, making sure she takes her medicine and getting her food to her. We have all helped keep homemade chicken and noodles, etc. in their frig. I help her shower, clean her house, help with cooking and laundry. Since I am also their beautician/barber, etc., and basic court jester giving them comic relief when needed. it's very convenient to only have them six miles away. It is my honor to serve them both as they have been the most loving parents who have always shown us how to love and live. Their marriage of 63 years is remarkable. She has come to love the "shakes" we are making with whey protein powder, Ensure, milk, and a dollop of ice cream. These have put the glow back in her cheeks and a little weight back on. We will continue to love, hug, pat and kiss her....making her as comfortable as we can for as long as we have her here. I have one brother and we are both on the same page and cooperating with one another, so that is a blessing.
Now that I have accepted all that is happening, I am better equipped to handle whatever happens. She is still smiling and now looking better than she has in months. Her taste is returning and she is eating better. Yesterday as I looked at her, she was absolutely radiant....! It is truly my honor to serve my Mother and Father. We will continue to take care of them in their home for as long as we can and then she will come here and we'll continue to do what we can to keep her out of pain. The blessings I have received in my life are many and I am grateful.
I am also so grateful for all of you.....Since you have shown so much love and concern, I thought I would bring you all up to date in this blog. To all of my Sparkfriends who have written, sent flowers, cards and listened to me rant in the middle of the night, I am humbled by your compassion, huge hearts and kindness! Thank you from the bottom of mine....For letting me vent....For being there to listen. You'll never know how much being able to do that has helped me. I know that I can handle whatever comes....I can smile, dance, be joyful for her and for the others I have to care for and who cares for me. I am trying to be positive and have a radiant spirit. It brings us all back from the devastating despair that covers us like a blanket at times. THANK YOU! XXOO MaryAnn
PS....I promise that my next blog will not be on this subject, but on something a little more cheerful. I appreciate your love so much and I pray that you and yours remain healthy and happy. Enjoy each and every day........Put your face to the sun and be glad..........


LIQUID11
3/17/2010 1:47PM
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Dear Mary Ann, Forgive my rather belated response to your soul shattering blog... Having lost my father of an extremely aggressive, most painful cancer back in 1981, in just 63 days time [he was only 51, I was 19, my sister 17 and my little brother 5 years old, and a devastated mother] puts me in a rather weak position, as I haven't yet completely recovered from the consequences of that dark period... [Just know that because of a severe post traumatic reaction I gained 180 Lb. in just 6 months going from 185 to 365 Lb. and practically ruining my life...] Now the fact that you dear and close friend are facing your mother's illness makes me shake of anger towards that stupid illness! All I can say, make her lough and fill her with joy and hope. Do not let the pain, fear and despair take over her soul. Try to ease her fears and please try to gather all the family and explain to them how important their supportive presence is to her. Sorry, I can not continue, I am starting to feel strange, forgive me! Kiss her and Hug her Tight for me, if you please. Andreas Report Inappropriate Comment |


MONKEYGETSFIT
3/15/2010 7:27PM
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I'm not around Spark much lately, but you and your family cross my mind often and I stop to say a little prayer. Your strength and courage, as always, is amazing and your parents are blessed to have you. I pray for your continued strength, acceptance, peace and moment of joy during this tough time. You are making memories you will cherish forever and giving your mom even more memories for her to cherish. Report Inappropriate Comment |


DACIUS
3/15/2010 3:53PM
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well for one...there is nothing at all wrong with bloging about this subject. This is what is going on in your life and what is weighing down your heart. We are all here to help one another out emotionally when things are good and bad. I have gotta say WOW!!! to the 63 years married!!! That is so incredible and amazing!!! Glad to hear mommas appetite is returning. Great idea with the whey powder and ice cream. A little indulgence to go along with some nutirtional strength is a great combo for her. Protien is such an important supplement we all tend to take for granted. Keep supporting her and remmeber that being the jester around her is probably the very best thing you can do for her. Nothing alleviates pain and sickness better than a smile. Report Inappropriate Comment |


JIMH1970
3/15/2010 12:07PM
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Thanks for sharing this with us Mary Ann. Your parents are very lucky to have you there to support them. Stay strong. Report Inappropriate Comment |


SPARKROZ
3/14/2010 9:49PM
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What strength you have......my sisters and I went through a similar situation with our mother a few years ago. Keep ALL the memories in your heart. I'm keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. You have such a beautiful spirit---keep blogging, your strength helps many people here on Spark more than you know. Blessings! Report Inappropriate Comment |


ALEXEMMY1
3/14/2010 6:53PM
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Dear MaryAnn, It is with much joy, not sadness that I read your blog. You have been going through a tough journey these past weeks. As much as we are here for you, it is your love and determination, as much as your mother's that will see you through. My joy is in reading the immense strength, support and love that you all give each other and the inevitable acceptance that comes along at some stage. I share with you the knowledge of the gift that a loving mother brings to our lives...no matter how old we are. You will be an inspiration to every child that has to go through the process of seeing their parents suffering, and taking on the loving mantle of caring for them, God Bless you, and much love and peace to you and your family. Lisette Report Inappropriate Comment |


MARELARK725
3/13/2010 8:11PM
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You are such a strong, amazing woman and daughter. This was so heartfelt and truly amazing. You can feel the love you have for her. Take care of yourself. It sounds like your mother has so much love surrounding her. She is truly in great hands. Thank you for sharing! Report Inappropriate Comment |


SI1V3RBACK
3/13/2010 3:42PM
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We all need a safe haven sometimes and yours should be here. A place you can open up about what is going on in your life and not worry about being judged because you are among those who know the pain of being judged, weighted and measured and not appreciated for who we really are. This is your save haven, your port in the storms and good weather. We will be here for you no matter how rough or smooth the waters get. Report Inappropriate Comment |


SIRCATNIP1
3/13/2010 12:33PM
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Wow!
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CANBDONE
3/13/2010 12:07PM
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I am going through this amazingly painful journey with my mother. Another friend referred me to your page and it has blessed me. Your beauty is inspiring, but your spirit is more so. Thank you for reminding me of the important things on this journey we're taking with our parents. I, too, consider it an honor to sit by my mom's bedside and rejoice in the time we have with each other. Report Inappropriate Comment |


LINDA25427
3/13/2010 8:17AM
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Mary Ann we are here for you .You can blog about your mother or whatever you want .Don't forget to take time for yourself and your wonderful hubby. Your are a graceful and beautiful woman. Take care. Love as always . Report Inappropriate Comment |


WOODSYGIRL
3/13/2010 12:19AM
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I'm just in awe of your strength and grace. You are truly a living example of what it means to live in the moment, live with compassion and passion, and to enjoy every single moment we are here on earth...knowing that this is not the final dance at all...we're just warming up. Report Inappropriate Comment |


SHAKENBAKE
3/12/2010 11:07PM
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Well done my grateful wonderful servant and friend. Despite this is such a challenging time for you, I commend you for sharing your story. My prayer is that as we go through life and these times in the future that we can have the loving compassion that you do in being so respectful honoring your precious parents. Keep a journal MaryAnn and take pictures every day. It will be wonderful to put together an album and what a precious story to treasure forever. Despite life is so short, it's great that you have been able to have so many wonderuful memories with both parents. Thinking of you as you celebrate each NEW day. Thank you Jesus for my friend, MaryAnn and Art! Report Inappropriate Comment |


DEBBIEANNE1124
3/12/2010 6:13PM
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Huggggzzzzzzz It's okay to talk aobut thsi subject as mucha s you want if it makes you feel better. i went through the same thing with my mother and father I can relate. Be strong for your family. They need you. Report Inappropriate Comment |


PATTYSH
3/12/2010 5:49PM
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I'm so glad to read this. I have had you all on my mind. It sounds like everyone has a wonderful attitude and outlook, but that doesn't surprise me one bit, knowing you. I'm sure you are every bit the blessing to your parents as you feel they are to you. That is a legasy that is handed down. You have been so fortuante to have your parents with you this long. Know that I think of you often and keep you all in my prayers. As always, Patty Report Inappropriate Comment |


LIVE2RUN4LIFE
3/12/2010 3:34PM
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PISTL67
3/12/2010 2:14PM
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hank sr., conway twitty- 8-track players. some memories are great. it's a great blessing to have family you're so close to. cherish the closeness and good memories. you're in my prayers. Report Inappropriate Comment |


BAILEYS7OF9
3/12/2010 11:53AM
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You can vent any time! and blog about anything. We'll be here, we'll read it and respond accordingly! Report Inappropriate Comment |


DOLLIE6
3/12/2010 11:39AM
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Lots of love and prayers I am sending.
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PTESORO
3/12/2010 11:26AM
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Thanks for the Blog MaryAnn! I know what an honor it is to care for a parent in the throws of terminal cancer; It is indeed an honor. It warmed my hart so to hear you say that! It is an odd dichotomy to be joyful in such a challenging sad time: I know that one too! I wouldn't have missed it for the world. I cherished he last days I spent with my father. And I am determined to be of service to my mother if/when she should need it. Which of course complicates my living situation with Jim. But he is completely understanding. So we might have to wait a few years til he come out here, or til we figure something else out! It is hard at times to stay positive, so in those times allow yourself to feel whatever you need to feel. Please remember to be gentle with your sweet self. Know my love and support is with you! Alesia Report Inappropriate Comment |


MJMEISSN
3/12/2010 11:26AM
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You, my dear friend are such and inspiration to me and I am sure many others as well.Thank you so much for sharing this. My thoughts and prayers are with you, your mother and your family. There is a prayer I have read from a subscription to Minute Meditations that really moved me. I want to share it with you in hopes that it will bring comfort to you as well. God of Grace God, you are a God of grace who bends to touch me in every hurting place. I need you. Be with me all the day. Send living water to refresh me until I sit in quiet with you again. — from Healing Troubled Hearts Report Inappropriate Comment |


CSIENK
3/12/2010 11:25AM
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I'm not sure how I stumbled upon your blog, but reading it brought tears to my eyes. You and your mother are lucky to have each other. Your beautiful spirit shines through in your words of caring for her and I can tell that you get it from her as I read about her dignity and grace in dealing with this devastating disease. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. Remember to take care of yourself as you're taking care of her. Report Inappropriate Comment |


SMILINGEYES2
3/12/2010 10:31AM
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Keeping you and your dear parents in my thoughts and prayers. Although, we have not met, I feel as though I would know them. It is difficult when roles reverse and we are nurturing our nurturer. They and you are blessed that you live nearby so that you can give each other support during this challenging time. Is there a hospice program there who can help your folks and you as you go this journey? I am sure your husband is your main support right with other family and friends there also for you--but you do need that as well. I have a sister in law who is a retired nurse and she is a hospice volunteer. It sounds like they can help through the various medical care that families may not know how to provide. Report Inappropriate Comment |


MTRICE
3/12/2010 10:22AM
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My heart goes out to you. Feel free to blog about any of your feelings, they are yours and they are legitimate. (((HUGS)))
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DEBRA_T
3/12/2010 9:43AM
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The love that you and your family have for yourselves and each other is shining through every bit of the difficult situation you are all facing. My prayers are offered for all of you. Report Inappropriate Comment |


MEADSBAY
3/12/2010 9:15AM
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My thoughts are with you and your family now, my friend. You have got a wonderful attitude and a beautiful spirit. This is a challenging time of life for you, your mom, and your whole family. Some of my siblings felt bad about not being around my mother during her last few years and were afraid I would be mad at them at some level but I felt so grateful that I was able to do it and it was my honor to care for her until her death. I would not have traded that for anything in the world. love, elizabeth Report Inappropriate Comment |


EOSAURORA84
3/12/2010 9:12AM
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sending you Report Inappropriate Comment |


JUSTLYLE
3/12/2010 9:10AM
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Sure so sorry to read about your Dear Mom. This can really take its toll on the family if you let it. We have gone through similar circumstances over 10 years ago. Make sure you keep doing some exercise, eat properly and sleep enough so as not to get down. You are blessed to be a part of such a loving family because you have also shown such love. My God bless and watch over your family. My prayers are with you and your family. Skeeter Report Inappropriate Comment |


JANNIEWANNIE
3/12/2010 8:46AM
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Sending you strength for these trying times. Hugs from Janet
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KIMBEROU812
3/12/2010 8:43AM
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What a beautiful blog for the story of your family and the love you all have for each other! Your parents are indeed blessed to have a daughter like you too!! Prayers for your family!! You are all making the best of a bad situation and with such grace and what a great example you are! Thanks for sharing - God Bless!
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ETWBOK
3/12/2010 7:54AM
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