Saturday, August 15, 2009
I am in an emotional struggle with myself today. As most of you know I am a New Yorker, Heart and Soul. Do to some situations beyond our control we moved back to Florida in'08 and a lot had transpired before and after the move. I am also a 5 year BC Survivor, with all my treatments etc down here. In '03 we moved back here from NY due to my sister's illness and DH position with CNN/Financial ended when the subcontractor he worked for lost their contract with CNN.
Today we turned on the news and the Tropical weather and potential hurricanes are looming out in the Atlantic. Common sense tell me A DUH, you know it is hurricane season and it is inevitable that they might hit Florida again. That is why you started to prepare ahead of time.
Common sense went right out the window and I started to shake and remember all the sadness of '05 with my treatments, and visiting my sister each day after treatment while she was so ill and the last time I was with her before she passed away.
My tears start to flow like right now and I remember piling Annabelle, Marissa and Jack into my SUV and driving for shelter away from the storms 4 times.
So here I sit, Not asking for pity, Oh please No. Just trying to put my feelings down so I can analyze them and hopefully dig a whole and put them in it. Slam the dirt on it and say RIP those negative feelings and fears.
It is all in our Good Lord's hands. what I have to go through I have to go through and count my blessing that I am here and alive and have the ability to recognize the need to let it all go.
Now I have to put on my Big Girl panties and hike them up. No not Depends...
Thank you for all who know me and do not know me who may stumble upon this Blog and heard my whining.
It is with your help and Non judgemental words that give us all hope.
OK Renee.. the Up-Girl is trying to stand up straight and tall and put one foot in front of the other.
Thanks for the kind words of support. They mean a lot.
For those of you who decide to leave a comment all are welcome constructive criticism is greatly appreciated and so is all the support.
Many hugs and Blessings to all out there. My heart and prayers go out to each and everybody here who has their own struggles.
Peace, Love and Joy to all.
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."