Wednesday, April 08, 2009
I am so close and so uncomfortable! The pressure on my pelvis is so intense! I have a doc appt tomorrow so he will tell me if I am starting to dialate. So tell me what you think of this situation...
Jeff and I have a pretty specific plan for the labor and delivery...
1- I am going to try to deliver without the use of meds (obviously we understand things can change and that meds may have to be given).
2- I want to try breast feeding within the first 2 hours (no binkies, no nipples, no formula, no bottle- as it can interfere with the babys desire to latch).
3- We want the labor to be private, just the two of us- so that we have time to bond as a family with the baby (family can come to the hospital after I am in the recovery room).
My parents are so very supportive. They understand how important all of these things are to us and don't question anything we are choosing at all.
Well, last night we went to Jeffs grandparents house and his mom was there. She said, "so Danielle, Jeff told me that you are not going to let the baby have a binkie, that's not true is it?" I said "yes, I don't want anything to interfere with the babys latch cause I want to breastfeed" and she totally freaked out. She went on and on about how the baby 'has to have' a binkie. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I have talked to numerous pediatrician, taken a breast feeding class and read numerous books and EVERYONE agrees that if the baby is given a bottle or binkie before they 'master' the latch on my breast- that the baby will not want to breast feed because they then realize that breastfeeding is more work for them and the bottle is easier. Okay, whatever- I let this go and leave it at that... then she gets on the topic of not having anyone in the room. All night she kept saying 'Grandma doesn't matter', 'Grandma doesn't get time with the baby', 'I am going to be so hurt if I am not here'. She just kept pushing and pushing and pushing and throwing a fit about the fact that we are not going to call anyone until after the baby is already here and we are in recovery. Jeff doesn't want anyone at the hospital AT ALL. His view is that everyone can see the baby when we get home. I know how much that would hurt everyone so I told him that we could let the parents come after I have been moved into recovery. And she is so upset. She wants to be called the second I go into labor so that she can be there. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? MY MOM ISN'T EVEN GOING TO BE THERE! I finally had enough and told Jeff it was time to go. She could obviously see I was mad. She then asked "are you coming over this Sunday for Easter dinner?" and I said "are you going to complain the whole time we are there about you not being there for the delivery?" and she said "yes" jokingly and I said very seriously- "then, No... we won't be there". I think she then realized just how mad I was because as we were walking out the door she said- "Danielle, you know I am just kidding- I wouldn't do anything to make you mad". HELLO? SHE DID MAKE ME MAD! I just don't understand how she can be so selfish. She at one point said that I will 'regret' not having her and my mom there for the delivery and the she was 'hurt' that I don't want her there. Well, I am hurt that she is being so selfish... bottom line this is NOT about her or my mom... this is about My husband and myself and our baby and us having this private bonding experience together!
I woke up still angry about it this morning. I think Jeff is going to have to take her aside and have a conversation with her- cause I am afraid of what I will say to her if she keeps this up. Am I just being hormonal? Or do you agree she is being out of control?