Monday, June 10, 2013
Before I went to sub a class this morning at the Y, I stepped on the scale there,...big mistake. My scale at home has been broken and TTOM is looming, so you can guess my reaction...YIKES.
I LIVE for carbs...they are my comfort, my go to, my now "frienimy" Being in the fitness field for 20 years, I can spew nutrition til I'm blue in the face...and my main spew to anyone is ' ANY diet that eliminates and entire food group is not healthy". That said....I can live off carbs. Protein?? What's that?? I could go for days without "quality" protein touching my lips. So, I am a hypocrite because I am doing what I tell others NOT to do....I am eliminating many food groups not just protien.
My stategy now??? I know I cannot live without carbs, that would be silly. However, I CAN control WHEN I eat them. Breakfast is my most fav meal and I can eat it anytime. Cereal is lethal to me--even stale stuff works in a pinch. I can get my carb "fix" in the morning by eating oatmeal (steel cut, of course), add some fruit, a dab of peanut butter and a little protein powder, combine that with a hard boiled egg, Easy peasy....now for the rest of the day....here is where I crash and burn. Carbs are easy, pick up a chip or cracker and your good. You can drive eating carbs, but it's harder to drive eating a chicken leg,..lol. Lunch, especially at work will be a challenge..but I can overcome that by planning in a fruit and protein snack in between breakfast (I should mention breakfast is usually 5:45 am) and my lunch (which can be anywhere between 10-12:30). I know I should follow the 3 hr rule, but in my profession, that can be difficult, but worth trying, Drive home from work is 3:15, so another fruit/protein combo is fine....then I am home and all my good intentions go down the drain. This is where my passion for carbs comes alive....ahhhh...chips and dip...where have you been all day? Little Debbie's snack cake...you taste divine....I know, I know, don;t have them in the house and you won't eat them...that's fine if you are the only one who lives there. Not in my world.
Blogging this right now has really helped me see why I love carbs,,,,my constant craving of them is telling me I am missing all the other food groups, and if I would put the carn down and pick up a protein, my brain will be happy!
Friday, June 07, 2013
Lately I have been having the feeling that I want to walk away from my life for a few days...let someone else be me and deal with my woea while I get to be carefree and problem free for a few days....wouldn't that be lovely?? Then I realize that everyone has their own problems. so I should try to figure out how to deal with mine.
One of my "problems" is that I LOVE food (who doesn't?)--especially carbs. I am also a stress eater, and this has come forefront in the last 9 months. How do I know that?? My spouse was working in Virginia until September, then he was fired (again) and moved back to Pittsburgh to find a job and live in the house where I live with my 2 kids, 2 dogs and 2 cats. It's weird how stress eating/weight gain/depression plays with your psyche. When I stress, I want the feeling of creamy yumminess in my mouth...french onion dip (chips are optional--not joking), nachos, mashed pototoes, Big Macs, ice cream. Do these foods make me feel better?? For about 30 seconds..then my mind snaps me into reality and I beat myself up for what I am doing,,,but CONTINUE to eat!! UGH
This was worse while on break from BLC...it was like my mind totally went on vacation and told my body that we will deal with the consequenses when BLC 22 started, which was this week, I am thankful for all these lovely ladies--and our newest member Matt for the support they have given me in the past, but I need to learn how to deal with this NOW.
My goals for this BLC is to post all my meals on my Sparkpage for all the word to see, Maybe I won;t eat it if I'm too embarressed to post it? I will blog everyday about my day and how I was able to overcome my stress eating by finding a diversion to the situation. BTW--I am very aware of the stressful thing in my life...notice it is a singular thing. I am in the process of getting rid of this,..just hitting some roadblocks. I am also going to incorperate more strength to my workouts and will add pilates, yoga and piyo to my routine. I am an Advocare distributor, so I see a 24 day challenge in my future, This will kick start my weight loss journey by incorperating a cleanse and 24 days of clean eating. I am also going to kick my running up as I am planning on participating in a 13.1 in Sept.
As for my "stressor".....I will get as far away from thism and when the cravings for creamy hit, I will reach for veggies and hummus (which I will measure out) instead of dip, listen to soothing music, or play a mindless game of pinball on my kindle. I will also reach out to my team for a quick hug,,,they are soooo good at that!
I can only count on myself for this journey, and I will not let myself down anymore
Monday, March 11, 2013
I hate to run.. This is no new revolation to me. However, if I plan on finishing the Pittsburgh Marathon, I'd better kick my non-running butt into gear. What's holding me back??? Simple answer---my knees. After 20 years of teaching higher impact aerobics (10+ on a concrete floor covered by linoleium), my knees feel as though they are 90. They swell and I have decreased range of motion. I personally can see and feel this....but do I stop torturing my knees? NOOOOO.....I love teaching too much (still doing plyometrics and higher impact at 44). I will successfully finish the marathon (thank goodness for Jeff Galloway and his training principles), then I will run away from running
Saturday, February 09, 2013
Today was my first 10k and I finished it in 75 minutes (that looks better than 1hr 15 min). I honestly think everyone should participate in some type of event they "think" they can do, but as the event is going on, you are thinking "WHAT AM I DOING??"
The race itself started at 9:45, but I arrived at 7:45 so I could get a decent place to park, dd in tow, If I ever fail to mention, it was a balmy 22 degrees at this point. Since I am already registered and have my number, I pop into the mail building to say hi to the gal running the event. She and I worked together at the Y. I always admired Samra--she is one tough cookie, but if your are her fried, she is a friend to the end. Sorry, I digressed. DD and I got a few samples from the sponsors (100 calorie "bite"bars, and I ate 2 in 30 seconds..lol).
Believe it or not. the race did start at 9:45. I lined up with all the other runners, heard the course route, then off we go. It figures the race starts UPHILL...ugh. I am running at this point, and I am watching people pass me (no worries yet, these are the people who are running freaks). Then I notice the other people passing me.....a lot of them were not as fit as me, per se, and there THEY go. Then the people in their 60's plus are passing me---what the heck? This is where I get frustrated....I should be able to beat them, right?? Nope. wrong answer--there they go. I started walking--running hurt and I can walk faster than I can run. I am watching these people who I should be beating or at least keeping up with move farther away from me. This is when I'm thinking, this was a big mistake, I can't do this. If I can't keep up here, how can I even think I can finish the Pittsburgh Marathon in May?? I catch up with an older woman, and she told me her trick,,,walk 2 minutes, run 2 minutes. HMMMM...I can do that! I ask her if I can run with her (as she was my pacer as I followed her) and she gladly accepted, The 2 min walk arrived, and my body said "No way" to running, I told her to go on, and I kept walking, Shallow statement alert...I am beating myself up thinking how can these overweight people keep running and I cant? I then think--they may be able to out rum me, but I KNOW I can out spin them, beat them in 1 minutes drills, etc. This is their THING,, their passion. Running is not my passion. It never will be. I change the music on my ipod to a playlist that will pull me through; TurboSport 1...my favorite TurboKick class ever, and keep chugging along.
I come up upon a huge clearing in the course along the lake and think "if I knew how thik the ice was, I would gladly cut across just to be out of the cold as I am walking into a headwind. Nope--keep on chugging along.
Although I was one of the last to finish, I did it. I was humbled by the fact that there were people who I would never in a million years were runners beating me, but this is what puts me in my place. It reminds me I am not a runner and never will be. Running is not my passion and never will be. But I can complete anything I put my mind to, proud and humbled.
Friday, February 01, 2013
Even though I have "been" a SparkPerson, it wasn't until Round 21 (current) that I realized what this group of wonderful women mean to me.
Let me explain....Round 19 I was (and at times ) a "newbie" to BLC and did not know what to expect. When I looked at the teams, I, of course being the overachiever that I am, picked one of the more challenging teams to be on, and they accepted me. I was on a different weight loss sites bootcamp challenge before this, so I was comparing the two in my head and trying to figure out if I made a HUGE mistake by joining my team (CAMO). What if I failed? What did CAMO expect from ME? And then there were the weekend challenges...oyi! I made it through round 19 with a couple battle wounds but felt happy with my results. Then came round 20..now I was taking 2 college classes while working 1 full time job, one part time job and taking care of my family. I thought for sure I was going to fail, and many times I wanted to quit--mainly because I felt I wasn't able to fully give myself to this group of ladies, I kept asking myself "HOW in the WOLD do the post EVERY DAY???? WITH PERSONSALS to boot?? Surely I am failing them.
These lovely ladies did not see me this way---they saw me as a team mate who was busy and accepted my drive by posts.. They sent me goodies and reminders that I am worth being happy and successful, and they were there to support me.
Now we are in Round 21, and I made a commitment to myself to post everyday and read the posts of my fellow teammates. In the past two weeks (and longer), I realized these wonderful women are just like ME--we are women struggling with weight loss. kids, jobs, family, eating, stress, self doubt and self loathing. We are sisters We are friends, We are teammates who leaves no one behind. Today I realized how much these women mean to me--they inspire me, they motivate me, and they accept me for who I am...a CAMO.
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