Monday, February 20, 2012
The FBI had an opening for an assassin.
After all the background checks, interviews and testing were done, there were three finalists: two men and a woman.
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill her!!
The man said, You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife.
The agent said, Then you re not the right man for this job.
Take your wife and go home.
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes.
The man came out with tears in his eyes. I tried, but I can't kill my wife, he said. The agent said, You don t have what it takes.
Take your wife and go home.
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room.
Shots were heard, one after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet.
The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow.
This gun is loaded with blanks, she said. I had to beat him to death with the chair.
Women are crazy. Don't mess with them
Saturday, February 18, 2012
The doctor's office called yesterday & the blood work showed I had normal uric acid level. (not gout?). She (the doctor) wanted me to take some gout medicine for 30 days just to see if it would help, but when I got to the drug store I refused to get it. (It was not generic & even with insurance the co-pay was too high). They used to have a generic for it, but do not anymore.
Now I have done some more research on the net & think it could be rheumatoid arthritis. My daddy had RA in his hands & I remember how swelled his joints in his fingers were & how painful they were). Anyway, after the 30 days she said if the medicine did not help I needed to get my feet x-rayed. I may do that next month when I have to go get my chest x-ray, etc. done for my breast cancer checkup.
All I know is they hurt & I have one pair of "walking type" shoes that I can wear...that is all. Everything else hurts too bad.
Friday, February 17, 2012
A ninety-year-old man is sitting on a park bench, sobbing,
when a young man walks by and asks him what's wrong.
Through his tears the old man answers, "I'm just so in love
with my twenty-five-year-old wife."
"What's wrong with that?" asks the young man.
Between the sobs and sniffles, he answers, "You can't
understand. Every morning before she goes to work, she cooks
me breakfast and kisses me and tells me she loves me. At
lunchtime she comes home and embraces me warmly, and then
she makes my favorite meal. In the afternoon when she gets a
break, she rushes home with ice cream, the best an old man
could want. And then after a gourmet supper, she gives ma a
warm bath, and she cuddles up with me all night." He breaks
down, no longer able to speak.
The young man puts his arm around him. "Oh, I think I see. I
bet you just found out she's with you for your money?"
"No," the old man answers through his sobbing and tears, "I
forgot where I live."
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Every woman deserves a man who calls her baby, kisses her like he means it, holds her like he never wants to let her go, doesn't cheat or lie, wipes her tears when she cries, doesn't make her jealous of other women, instead makes other women jealous of her, is not scared to let his other friends know how he really feels about her, and lets her know how much he really loves her.
I have been blessed to have someone like this for 51 years, how about you?
Love you, DH!!
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