Tuesday, November 05, 2013
So, Halloween happened. And then I went to visit friends in Cleveland for the weekend, where they had a belated Halloween party. I fell off the mainly plant-based wagon. Especially in the dairy department. I gorged on cheesy pizza, ice cream, cake (with frosting, naturally), and of course, lots of Halloween candy. I am feeling it, too...more sluggish, more achy in my joints. I'm also having trouble stopping. I got home yesterday after flying home (flying stresses me out anyway, so that didn't help the situation) and promptly ordered pizza because I didn't feel like cooking.
Why do I self-sabotage? I have no idea. I know I shouldn't do it, I know that it's bad for me, but undoing a lifetime of bad habits means I'll have inevitable slip-ups. Right? Right?
And the thing is, even though I really don't like cheese all that much anymore--it's slimy, it's salty, and I really don't like the flavor or texture of it--I couldn't stop myself from eating it. I don't get it. Now I'm stuck trying to backtrack and detox from all the crap I put in my body over the last few days.
I need to plan ahead and figure out how I need to eat when I travel. I switched to vegetarian the last couple of times I've traveled, and I've allowed myself to make poor decisions within that guideline. LIke the ice cream. Like the cheese. When I have more control over my food--not having to rely on others or restaurants for my meals--I do better. Even when traveling--when we visit the Outer Banks, we are able to bring our own food.
I know what I did wrong, and I know what needs to be done to fix it. However, I'm still in the binge. Perhaps it's because my fiance is on the other side of the world--literally: he's in Hong Kong--and I miss his presence and his ability to keep me in line food-wise. I tend to eat worse when he's not around. Another form of self-sabotage, I realize.
Time to stop. I can do this. I have allowed myself to slip, but it's time to stop the slide and get back on track.
Saturday, October 12, 2013
Well, last month I was still dealing with the intercostal rib strain--turned out I had also strained my rectus abdominus muscles (they run vertically from under the rib cage to the pubic bone) when my back had gone out back in August, and I was healing from that as well. Took my massage therapist and I awhile to figure it out, but she worked on my abdominal muscles, and things are much improved. Almost back to my usual semi-normal.
However, the weather changed this week--cool, overcast, rainy. This was not a good development. First six days of October, we got out to walk every day. Even walked 6.52 miles one day (nearly half of a half marathon!). However, the weather blew in and has been sitting over us, and it's affecting me. My low back's been sore again. My muscular headache has been around most of the week. I've had low energy and have been overall achy in general (I have a lot of osteoarthritis I deal with every day). I haven't worked out since Sunday. I did go back to the massage therapist yesterday, and she worked on my back and my neck. Back seems to be better this morning, but the headache is still sticking around. *sigh*
I had pretty much eradicated my menstrual migraines since changing my diet, and my frequency of other types of headaches had decreased a lot as well. So having a headache due to muscle strain for a week is not fun. Especially since I just got over a four-day muscular headache...it really doesn't want to go away. I'm hopeful I'll be able to do a short walk later on today, however. Will have to work through the headache.
Overall, though, despite the headache, I am feeling a lot less achy. The ribs and abdomen strains are just about healed. This is important, because I've been waiting to step it up a bit workout-wise...I want to start interval training, but I've held off because my core wasn't feeling good. Now it's just about to the point where I might be able to start soon. We're going to go to Asheville next weekend and do some hiking, and when we get back I'd like to start intervals. I think I might be ready.
When the headache goes away. I know it's muscular in nature, so having to do stretches and massage therapy and heat and ice is the way to go here. Meds will not fix this. I'm determined to beat this headache. I know sometimes after massage you feel worse before you feel better...that's the tack I'm taking with this headache. Pesky pesky headache.
I will not let the headache impede my progress. I'm finally coming out of my pain spiral, and I can see the end of the tunnel I've been stuck in for the last two years. I'm almost there.
Saturday, September 07, 2013
I know there's a lot to be said for non-scale victories. However, I want to crow a bit about my scale victory today. I finally have made it 25% of the way to my weight-loss goal! I have a lot of weight to lose...a smidge over 100 pounds. However, I can officially say from my all-time high, I've lost 25.4 pounds as of this morning. That's been a long time coming...New Year's 2012 was when I hit my all-time high. Since then, I have radically changed my diet, but it's still been slow to come off (the "joys" of having PCOS). I know losing weight slowly is the healthy way to do it...at this rate, it'll take me another 4 years to get the rest of the weight off, but I'm okay with that.
My immediate goal (and it's an 8-month goal) is to lose 10 more pounds and 4.5 inches from around my bust measurement by the wedding. I would really like not to have to have my wedding dress altered. I like the back of the dress, but it doesn't fit at the moment. I'm okay with having a corset back put in the dress, but I'd really like to have the option. I think this is an attainable goal...I have slowly come to the realization that I'm just not one of those people that loses weight fast. So what some people can do in a month or two, it takes me six months or longer.
I've also lost 9% of my body weight. Nothing to sneeze at. Overall, I feel more comfortable in my skin. Having PCOS, I got very comfortable being at a certain weight--maintained it for DECADES--so when a medication jacked up my weight, it was not a good feeling. I've lost all the weight I gained on that medication, so I feel like I'm more at my true starting weight in this weight-loss journey. Which is probably not the best way to look at it, but I'm not going to overthink it.
I'm pleased with my progress so far. I don't care that it's been slow and oftentimes frustrating. The scale is still going in the right direction, and that's the important thing. I will lose the weight, just slower than most people. And that's okay, because that's me.
Monday, September 02, 2013
I just got back from the most amazing trip. I spent two weeks on the West Coast, exploring Seattle, then taking a cruise to Alaska and Canada. I saw things I'd never seen before, like the Space Needle, Chihuly Glass, beer brewed with spruce tips, glaciers up close, and so much more. It was truly a once-in-a-lifetime sort of trip.
However, did not eat quite as well as I could have or should have. I switched to vegetarian for this trip, which basically meant I was including eggs and dairy in my plan. By the end of the trip, my stomach was pretty unhappy, even with my regimen of probiotics and vitamin supplements. I'm pretty sure it was the dairy. I'm hopeful by the time I take my next cruise the mostly vegan way of eating will be more ingrained and it will be easier to adhere to.
Overall, my back did improve with all the walking we did in Seattle, and I actually lost inches while there (I did gain 2.6 pounds while on the trip, but I honestly think it was muscle...my legs were rock-hard by the end of our week in Seattle!), so I'm taking that to be a positive thing.
As of yesterday, have returned to my usual way of eating. I'm weaning off the sweets with a couple of processed foods, but the soda is off the menu. (I was drinking a lot of ginger ale and Shirley Temples...ginger ale for my queasy stomach, the Shirley Temples just because.) And the desserts, most of which had dairy in them (and where most of the dairy I ate came from). I did notice that I had a couple of vegetarian options at dinner on the boat that were loaded with cheese, and it made the dish so salty I couldn't eat it. I know now my palate has definitely changed--before, it wouldn't bother me. Now, it's totally evident...and unpalatable.
I expect a weight loss this week, since I'm essentially detoxing from our trip. Then I'll get back to work. I have a personal trainer appointment tomorrow, but I may postpone (even though it's been six weeks)--I came back from Alaska with a head cold (as did half of the folks I was traveling with). I'll have to see.
But, Alaska. Amazing. Awe-inspiring. Beautiful. Can't wait to go back.
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Not even an hour after I made my last post, I went to clean up some cat vomit under my desk. (I know, not a pretty thing.) I threw my back out as a result. I spent all day Sunday in an inordinate amount of pain. I have degenerative disk disease, and bulging discs at L4 and L5, and this was just the latest flare-up. I don't get these often, but when they do, I literally lose my legs. My back gets incredibly weak and I can't support my legs. This time it was just the left leg, but still...not good at all. And did I mention the sciatica?
Of course, I'm in panic mode. I have to get on a plane and fly across the country on Saturday morning! I'm going on a two-week bucket list type of vacation! The Pacific Northwest! Alaskan cruise! THIS IS NOT HAPPENING!
Out came the muscle relaxers. The ice packs. The Tylenol. The topical NSAID was repurposed for this. All day was an exercise in agony. Yesterday I was at the Carolina Back Institute first thing...I'm doing all the right things, the nurse practitioner I see said I can continue massage therapy. I have standing orders for physical therapy and a steroid injection if I decide I need it. (I've never had an injection for this back thing before, but time isn't on my side here, so it's still an option to consider.) I went to massage therapy yesterday and go again tomorrow, and may go again Friday. I dug out my TENS unit and intend to take that with me on my trip.
It is improving. Slowly. The sciatica is gone. My back is supporting my legs again. I still have pain, but I'm not shuffling around like I was. I was literally dragging my left leg around on Sunday. However, I've now got the side effect of flared-up core muscles. Including around my ribs. I cannot seem to catch a break so my body can calm down. There is a lot of downtime built into our cruise, and I hope that will help my health anxiety and my assorted aches. Perhaps a change of scenery will do good in more than one way.
I'm hopeful that I can drive myself to massage therapy tomorrow. My fiance drove me to the doctor and the massage therapist yesterday...I couldn't move very well at all. I think I'll be able to cope with the long plane ride on Saturday. It's walking around Seattle that I may have to scale back on a bit...will have to see. Right now, I'm optimistic. I think I caught this before it got really bad. It's just the latest installment of a long line of back injury. I've been having issues with it since high school.
One thing is for sure--I am positive that the fact I haven't been able to work out in two months contributed to this flareup. Exercise really does help keep me at a level of fitness that I don't have right now. As soon as I can, I will be back working out...although I will have to ease into it.
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