Monday, March 07, 2011
I was a faithful Sparker about a year or so ago. So what happened? Life! My work hours increased to 11-12 a day. There was no time left for exercise or healthy cooking. I know, I know....excuses, excuses. I'll be the first to admit it.
I started Sparking June 2010 with my highest weight of 252. I was faithful with exercise/healthy eating, getting down to 190 by December 2010. Well, it's March 2011 and here I am at 215 pounds. I guess I need to be grateful that I didn't regain it all, only 30 pounds, half of it.
A couple of weeks ago I joined Weight Watchers Online, and am enjoying the program, although not overjoyed with the weight loss so far (I've only lost 5 pounds since 2/24 - 11 days). Hmmm, I guess that's not so bad really.
But I really missed SP. The support here is amazing. So I'm going to continue WW Online and Spark at the same time. I will do this. I have to do this. I threw out all of my size 22s & 24s.....gotta get back into those 16-18s by summer. I hate squeezing this 20 butt in 18s. Wish me luck!
Wednesday, December 02, 2009
The past couple of days have been so hard. I've been in the bed sick for the past couple of days and been doing horribly with my eating. You would think that when you are sick you wouldn't want to eat, but not me. It's been so horrible, like the old me...pizza, fries, burger, you name the worst possible food and I've eaten it. Now I'm heart sick too. I haven't behaved this way in over 6 months and I don't know what to think of myself.
I don't know what has gotten into me, slacking off a bit for the holiday weekend or getting sick. It's like I've turned into the old Denise thinking about food, planning my next junk food meal, actually eating that junk food.
Last night I broke down in tears.....and STILL ate the pizza. I cried while eating eating!! What? I don't know how but I've got to get my control back. I'm hoping tomorrow I'll have the strength to go to gym. That should straighten me up. I sure hope so.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
I woke up energized and ready to roll at 7:00 am this morning so I did T-Tapp, some of The Firm's Cardio Blast, and a 2 mile walk all before church this morning. Great right? Well, that is where the good news ends.
I have proceeded to eat 2,000+ calories today. You would think after losing over 50 pounds I would know better than to do this to myself. But do I, NO! I had no intention of consuming so many calories....but........ I should know better than to eat cheesecake (not to mention the other crap like Ranch dressing). Yeah I said it, cheesecake. OMG!!!!! Do you have any idea the calories? You don't want to know either.
The worst part about it was I didn't even think about it. I just ate it, like everyone else was doing. Lesson learned today: I am really going to have to focus or the weight's going to start piling back on.
It seems like now that I have finally made it to Onederland I am try to sabatoge myself. I've stopped being precise. There's something screwy going on in my head that I've got to get a grip on. Carelessness will destroy all my hard work and I've got to get a grip.
Has this happened to anyone else after making such good progress? If so, let me know what you did to pull it back together. I cannot let myself off the hook......I don't want to start eating like this and then try to justify it. Today was not okay!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Well, here I am exactly five months and 51 pounds later in Onederland!! This is such an amazing feeling. I can't explain it really; a combination of excitement, happiness, and elation rolled up with fear, anticipation, and trepidation.
I do know how far I've come, I do. I've lost 10 inches alone just off my hips. But at the same time I'm so afraid that I'll mess up now. I can't screw it up now! I suppose part of the fear is in the fact that I've never made it this far before. In the past I've given up long before getting to this point.
I'm going to dig in deep and focus now on my strengths and determination. I know that I can do this, I can. Alright Denise, you will not falter!
Saturday, October 24, 2009
So on a whim today I decided to have my hair cut. The bangs were getting long and annoying so I popped in to the little place inside our local Wal-Mart...had to be there to pick up some necessities anyway.
So I told the hairdresser that I was sick of my hair and that I'd lost a few pounds so just give me a flattering stlyle, I didn't care what, just whatever. I LOVE this cut!!!!!!! She did an awesome job.
When I looked in the mirror it was the first time I'd seen that my face is getting smaller. Wow.....so I did this little comparison for myself but I'll share...I'm that excited!
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