DELORENZO74   4,374
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My 39th Birthday and NOT Where I Want to Be:(

Tuesday, August 06, 2013

I have not been on SparkPeople in a LOOOOONNNNGG time! Seeing all of this again makes me feel pretty low ~ like it was just another failed attempt to lose weight. I KNOW that I CAN lose the weight...I did it before. I really do not want to be at this place on my big 4-0 birthday next year.

This year has brought so many wonderful things our way. We purchased a new home and we LOVE it where we are. I resigned from my teaching position which was a HUGE deal, but I want to be with out daughter while she is little. She is going to PreK five days a week for two hours and 45 minutes. She is really growing up too fast and this time is so precious. This will be the last year I am home full time.

I have the time to commit to losing the weight now. NOW is truly the time. However, it is discouraging when I read back these posts and remember that I lost the weight but it all stopped when I returned to work full time after my maternity leave the last time.

Feeling frustrated!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALEXSGIRL1 8/6/2013 7:41PM

    happy birthday I don't concentrate on losing weight anymore I try to lift weights three times a week and get as much cardio in as I can . it is all about being healthy and fit and not numbers therefore I hardly ever get discouraged and this is not a chore.think of where you are going not where you've been

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DEEDAYE 8/6/2013 11:26AM

    Losing weight is just another thing you need to do for yourself and for your family. Just as your daughter is better served by your being at home with her, she will be better off having a healthy mom for years to come. Your lifestyle will be her lifestyle. So for get the past, look to the future.

"Concern yourself not with what you have tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible to do."
~Pope John XXIII

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.”~Aristotle

"Your biography is not your destiny, your decisions are."~Tony Robbins

emoticon emoticon emoticon The best is yet to be!

Comment edited on: 8/6/2013 11:27:58 AM

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JIMARICO 8/6/2013 11:08AM

    First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Secondly, I did the same thing when I came back and looked at my SparkPage to see that I had written "2012 will be MY year!" and it was halfway through 2013. I hadn't gotten very far in 2012. I turn 39 in January and I always said I wanted to lose the weight before I turn 40. I'm finally on the right path! You CAN do this! And you have the perfect opportunity to get your workouts in while your daughter is at pre-K! Find something you love to do. And as always, your Spark community is here to help you through the tough times!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JOLENEREEVES 8/6/2013 10:37AM

    I felt the exact same way when i checked back in 3 weeks depressing that I have to go all the way back to the begining.
I just keep reminding myself how great it felt to be at the lake in the summer playing with my girls and not be sooo worried about what people are thinking of me. Or those jeans that i still have, how great it felt to put those on...... I want to feel that again.
Just how much more i enjoyed life!

You can do it.... forgive yourself for the past and look to the future. emoticon Heres to the second time arounders!

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DEJAMQ 8/6/2013 10:31AM

    emoticon emoticon Just make today day one and don't look back as it will frustrate you more.

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JULIA_211 8/6/2013 10:28AM

    Keep moving forward from this day on! Make this your year! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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NOTANINJA 8/6/2013 10:27AM


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WOW...Time Is Flying!

Thursday, October 21, 2010

I can't believe we are nearing the end of October! I miss SP so much, but now I am finding I barely have time to do anything. Gotto love it when people think teachers work until 3 pm and that is it. HA! emoticon If I only worked the hours that school is actually in session I would never have a lesson plan and nothing would ever get graded.

I hate saying I don't have enough time, but it is true (at least right now in my life.) Our daugher is waking up sometimes as early as 4 am! I really think she misses time with Mommy & Daddy and wakes up just for those quiet moments in the early morning cuddling. My school dismisses the students at 3:10 pm. Technically, I am supposed to stay until 3:30 pm, but there are time I leave asap to pick up Bella from my mom's house. That is 45-50 minutes in the car. Bella and I are usually home by 5 pm and then I have to feed her and start thinking of what to make for dinner for me and hubby.

So, the day wraps up at about 7 pm. There is no way I could exercise that late and go to bed...I'd be too pumped up to sleep. ANNNDDD, in all honesty I am too pooped! At that point I write lesson plans or grade papers, go through my e-mail, bills, etc... and I am off to sleepy land emoticon

The good news is that I have still managed to lose a little more weight! I honestly have no idea how and I am shocked. I was actually dreading the scale. I was pleasantly surprised when I was down another 1.5 lbs. The bad news is this is not as fast as I wanted things to move and I miss my workout routine emoticon

Seriously, we moms have sooooo much on our plates. I just have to remember that I can have it all; I just may not be able to have it all at once.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SPARKLE_SHINE66 10/21/2010 9:37PM

    That's great about the weight loss! Life is so busy with kids and it is hard to try and get everything done in a day!
Glad to hear from you!

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ABIGAILSING 10/21/2010 3:15PM

    emoticon on the weight loss!

Enjoy that little one while you can. One thing I used to do when my kids were little is use them for my weights. There are exercises you can do as a game with them that will both give you time with her having fun and work those muscles at the same time. Yep. Mom's are busy, so they have to get creative to get the exercise they need to maintain health and strength for many more years with their children...and their children's children. Keep up the good work! emoticon

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LESLIES537 10/21/2010 10:59AM

    So, so true! Just not enough hours in the day sometimes! Congrats on the 1.5 lb loss! emoticon

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    I really like your last statement "I just have to remember that I can have it all; I just may not be able to have it all at once." That is such a hard concept for many of us to get. We think we DESERVE it all at once and when it doesn't happen, we give up.

Keep up the hard work. It will come, in His time. Take it from a mom of teenagers: little ones become big ones in the blink of an eye. Enjoy little Bella while you can! No matter what anyone says, you cannot make up any time you have missed.


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IRISHLASS2012 10/21/2010 8:02AM


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RRP546 10/21/2010 6:33AM

  babyhood goes fast

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BILL60 10/21/2010 6:26AM

    You hang in there and do the best that you can.

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HELENA260 10/21/2010 6:15AM

    Time does seem to past quickly, but you need to make time for you because you deserve it!!!

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DWROBERGE 10/21/2010 6:11AM

    time flies when you are having fun.

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Survived the First Partial Week Back to Work :)

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Well, this was an almost full week back to work (we were off yesterday for the Jewish holiday.) The most difficult part is feeling like a barely have any time with our daughter. My husband brings her to my mom in the morning and I pick her up after work. I get there about 4:15 pm. By the time we get home, eat dinner, and wash up it is time for her to go to bed!

I am so thankful that she is with my mom though ~ Joe and I both have peace of mind all day rather than being worried and questioning if she is okay all day.

I miss working with middle school students, but I really like the new school I am at and the teachers there are great to work with emoticon

I have not lost anymore weight, but I haven't gained back either ~ AMEN! I have not been able to exercise and that is driving me crazy. I keep setting my alarm clock earlier and our daughter keeps waking up earlier! I am not sure if I can wake up any earlier than 5 am. I am already barely able to stay awake past 9 pm! What a geek emoticon

The evenings are hard for me for a few reasons. First, I have no motivation after work and it is easy for me to tell myself I am too tired. Second, I truly am too tired. Third, I'll have trouble falling asleep if I workout that late. Soooo, I have yet to find a way to get my exercise into my day emoticon I did start the Kettlebell class on Wednesday and I really liked it! That is only one night a week though. My goal right now is to figure out a way to exercise on a regular basis.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

14JESUSGIRL 9/19/2010 7:22PM

    I have to get up at 5:00, too, to be on the road by 6:30 for a 50 minute commute to the school where I teach. I get home late, also because of the commute. Like you, I'm VERY tired when I get home. Also, like you, I'm usually in bed by 9:00. I don't have a little one, though. All my "little ones" are "big ones".
I'll be praying for you.
Love in Christ,

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THENEWDARLENE 9/13/2010 10:18PM

    Just hang in there! Once you get used to your new routine you will find ways to work in the exercise. Focus on all the positive things you can do right now that aren't affected by your schedule... like drinking enough water every day.

emoticon emoticon

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MOMFAN 9/11/2010 10:29PM

    Just try ten minutes.

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SPARKLE_SHINE66 9/11/2010 11:13AM

    I agree with Kid-At-Heart. You're adjusting to a new routine. Once you settle into working, you'll find ways to work in exercising!

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KID-AT-HEART 9/11/2010 9:18AM

    You're so fortunate to have your mom nearby to watch your daughter -- she's a lucky little girl to spend so much time with Grandma! Getting back into the swing of things after a long hiatus is definitely a challenge! Coming back to school after just the summer is hard! Once you find your new groove at work and at home, the exercise routine will come as well. I totally understand the feeling crazy for not being able to exercise -- it'll happen. One day at a time! emoticon

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And the WINNER is...

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

The winner of my second book giveaway is ~ SCLARKE769!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEENY_BIKINI 9/4/2010 6:42AM


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LHLADY517 8/31/2010 12:16PM

    Congrats SCLARKE769!

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MSPOOH404 8/31/2010 10:39AM

    Wow...that's great! How often do you give away books and what kinds of books are they? I may want to get in on the action!

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Not Going Back to Egypt

Saturday, August 28, 2010

My husband and I are having some marital troubles right now. Our marriage is strong and we love each other very much, but unfortunately we are revisiting an issue that was thought to be resolved. It amazes me sometimes how quickly we forget the pain and anguish our actions hurt others and how easily we succumb to doing the WRONG thing time and time again. I can’t help but think of the Israelites being led through to the promise land by Moses. Whenever I am facing a challenge in my life, God places certain topics and scriptures in my path over and over. Some would just shrug it off and think it coincidence, but I know better ~ He is speaking to me through The Word.

Over and over again, the people of Israel disobeyed God and lost Faith the minute things went wrong (wrong in their minds that is.) While Moses spent 40 days and nights on the mountain receiving instruction from the Lord, the people lost hope and carved an idol! The Lord was so weary of them! Oh, and the complaining and moaning! Just reading their complaints makes me tired. Each and every time they were confronted with an obstacle they wanted to run back to Egypt! Egypt!?! Where they were slaves! Egypt, where they were mistreated and considered less-than! But are we not just like them?

When I discovered this problem in our marriage reared its ugly head again I instinctively wanted to run back to Egypt! “Oh, Lord, why do I bother? I should just stay as I am ~ fat and tired. All my efforts to bring about positive change in my life and the life of my family are in vain. Here we go again! I didn’t ask for this, Lord. Why are you letting this happen?”

And then the physical instincts/habits began: I just wanted to hide under the covers and sleep. Grab some rich, creamy ice cream and numb these awful feelings of despair. I simply wanted to head back to Egypt!

But God reminded me of how far I have come…what I have overcome before and how He has used it ALL FOR GOOD in my life. He will use this hardship for good as well if I give it to Him and Faithfully do all that He asks. I do not have to “go it alone” and pitifully drag myself through this problem with my head hung low. I don’t have to crawl into bed and pull the covers over my head and hide. I don’t have to eat a gallon of Haagen Daz ice cream.

So, this morning I DECIDED to get up, put on my workout clothes, lace up my walking shoes and WALK. This problem will be there whether I walk toward Him or I head back for Egypt. I am choosing to walk out of the wilderness and continue heading in a better direction toward freedom DESPITE the problems and DESPITE the fact that I don’t feel like it. “I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THENEWDARLENE 8/31/2010 6:50PM

    This is a really, really good blog post. I've been teaching in the book of Exodus lately, and it always amazes me how whiney and disobedient those Israelites were. Then I'm reminded that people today (ME!) are really no different. The Bible says that there is nothing new under the sun. We so easily forget how good God has been to us and start whining for something more.

I'll be praying for you and your husband. Keep up all your hard work, and keep that good attitude.

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SONYATAYLOR1 8/30/2010 2:06PM

    When we hit those hard times that's when we need to hit our knees in prayer! This too shall pass. emoticon

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NEWLIBRARIAN 8/29/2010 8:44AM

    May God Bless you and keep you. May God's face shine upon you and your marraige. BE STRONG sister

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MOMFAN 8/29/2010 1:51AM

    His grace if sufficient and he will sustain us.

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14JESUSGIRL 8/28/2010 5:39PM

    Wonderful blog! I'm sorry for your difficulties. The Lord will help you and I can tell from your blog that you are in position to receive His help!
Many blessings to you, dear sister in Christ!
Lee emoticon emoticon

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FISHKNEES 8/28/2010 5:23PM

    awesome blog...Thanks for sharing...I will also walk out of the wilderness and not head towards Egypt and the river denial...

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LOOZINITNOW 8/28/2010 4:48PM

    Praying things work out for you. Good job controlling what could have been a bad situation. emoticon

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URSULA125 8/28/2010 4:05PM

    Good for you!!! Onward and upward. I pray the problems will soon be in the past and that your marriage be abundantly blessed, In Jesus name, Amen! emoticon emoticon

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MINDYJ1 8/28/2010 4:00PM

    emoticon emoticon

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JULIEFRANCES112 8/28/2010 3:55PM

    Praying that you and your husband work out your problems. Keep your focus on Jesus and he will help you through the tough times.
emoticon emoticon

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LHLADY517 8/28/2010 2:25PM

    Thanks for sharing.

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KATRIONAH 8/28/2010 2:08PM

    Good blog. Keep your focus on Jesus and let him lead you out of that wilderness and towards your promised land. Something lots of us, including me need to remember. Thank you for sharing this with us. emoticon

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TAFFIN2000 8/28/2010 1:48PM

    Keep your focus on the Lord...worship Him. Delight in Him and He will give you the desires of your heart.
I have marriage problems. My husband has backslidden to the point of denying the Bible is true. After years of holding on, I gave up hope. The following three or four years were the worse years ever. Thank the Lord He has helped me find my way back.
I don't know what you are going through, but I do know God loves you very much! No matter what, keep your eyes on Him! Worship Him.

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EDUCGRAD 8/28/2010 1:33PM

    Big hugs to you.Great attitude,it is easy to give in to food and/or not work out. I've been there.Keep up the great work

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LIGHTHOUSEGIRL1 8/28/2010 1:13PM

    Great blog...thank you for sharing this..this is something I needed to see and read as I am facing some issues job related right now. Have a blessed weekend. emoticon emoticon

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BUTTERFLY_MT 8/28/2010 12:19PM

    Awesome. Thanks for the reminder!!

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