Monday, March 07, 2011
To hell with this wishy washy up and down ridiculous roller coaster I have been riding for the past 9 or 10 months!! Seriously, I am over it! So here's the deal: I am a classic case of all or nothing, and when I say "nothing", I mean "NOTHING". I have made several attempts to get back on my "Spark Streaks", but when I mess up once....that's it!! Honey buns, donuts, lasagna, chocolate, ice cream...whatever I wanted. I justified it by saying "I'll start over Monday." That pathetic way of thinking has helped me gain 20 lbs of the 14 I had lost. Yeah, you read that right. I lost 14 lbs this time last year and have managed to gain that back PLUS another 6! Yay! I look back and realize I went 60 days non-stop without missing exercise. I remember how great I felt and exercise was almost some cult I had joined because it didn't matter if it was pouring rain....I was jogging! I am sooooo going back there. I don't care how bad I've messed up...forget about that. What matters is that I am back here, in an honest frame of mind, with all of you guys who are soooo awesome and helpful and encouraging!! I am making a pledge to myself here and now that for the next 90 days I will exercise NO LESS than 6 days a week. I will make healthy food choices and I will lose as close as possible to 40 lbs. I am serious. No matter what happens....I WILL NOT quit! For once in my life I am going to see something through 100% until the end!! I am going to buy myself a "goal outfit" and i will celebrate small "wins" on here with all of you! I feel better already!
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
How's this for an excuse? My father ran for sheriff of our county this summer (the final election was Nov. 30th). I tried and tried to keep up with my P90X and Insanity workouts, but the campaign really did pretty much consume us the entirity of the fall. I'm an all or nothing kind of girl I'm afraid. In other words, when I didn't have time to exercise, I chose not to eat right too! So, here I am, holidays are over, beginning of a new year. I am very happy that I only gained back a couple of lbs that I had lost, so it's not a total loss. Time to get back in there, though! So....here goes nothing!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Obviously, I am feeling like a total failure today! I was doing so well. Doesn't every miserable sad tale of failure begin that way? Ugh! First, i was so in the groove with my running and P90X. Overkill, maybe, but it was working. I have been ignoring a throbbing knee pain for a good 2 weeks and on Friday afternoon (during my jog) it became unbearable and I literally limped home! I can't explain this pain, it's really odd. It gets worse and worse as I run and when I am finished, I can't even walk for about 20 minutes and then it eases up some. Strangest part is that my ankle has the exact same pain? So I thought if I just ran through it I would eventually get over it! No such luck! Now I have obviously injured myself because I've been hobbling around since Friday's run (as in NO EXERCISE since Friday). I want to cry writing it! Did I mention I was on a 45 day streak?
So, as if that wasn't enough, my 18 month old starts running a fever on Thursday evening. Took him to the doctor Friday and we were told it was a virus and to treat the symptoms with Tylenol and Motrin. This goes on for 4 days and included 2 nights in a tepid bath at 2 AM and a trip to the ER Sunday night (Monday morning actually at 3:30 AM). I missed work Monday and half of today! I am tired as hell! I am lethargic! My 10 year-old's Birthday was Sunday and I felt terrible for him because the whole weekend ended up being about the baby! So, I indulged in 2 pieces of his Dairy Queen Ice Cream Cake! I ate terrible Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and now again today! I can feel the rut coming on and I am freaking out! I have that, "Oh well, I've already screwed up attitude" and I am hurt and can't do much for exercise! This sucks in the worst sort of way! I was almost at the 20 lb mark! Wonder how bad I have already screwed this up? Scared to death to get on the scale! HELP!
Tuesday, September 07, 2010
Ok, this may be lengthy and I apologize beforehand to anyone who may bother to read this. Prior to Spark, I was going to a fat doctor who weighed me, gave me a B12 shot and some prescription diet pills (phentermine). So, I find Spark, get my mind in the right mode and I have been diligent ever sense. I started P90X 3 weeks ago! I am amazed how much I have improved in just 3 weeks as to what my body is capable of doing. In addition to DAILY P90X, I have been running 1 to 2 miles a day! So, the fat doctor called this morning to remind me of my monthly appointment today at 9 AM, and you have to pay even if you don't show up...so I thought, what the heck, I'll go! So I'm all excited to step on their stupid magic scale that (God only knows how) tells you your BMI and your water % and your body fat %. OMG! It said I had gained 2 1/2 lbs, my BMI had gone up and my body fat has gone up! Then when we have our consultation, I tell fat doctor everything i've been doing (drinking a bathtub full of water a day, running, P90X, logging food, heart rate monitors, the whole 9 yards) and do you know what this man told me??? He said I need to cut my calories down to 800-1000!!!!! I told him Sparkers have told me that your metabolism slows down when you don't eat enough calories with all of this working out and he said that was not true!! I am so upset I don't know what to do! HELP!!!!
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