Monday, November 08, 2010
Recovering from Compulsive Overeating is a lifelong task. I am ready to assume it. I have been binge free for over a year. When I've slipped it has been minor and for short periods only. I have gotten right back on track. What is different now?
Yes, I have Spark and that makes a HUGE difference, but there is something different in my mindset. I can feel it ebb and flow. Most days I am filled with a desire to live in a healthful way and to not make food the center of my life. Other days I can feel an "I don't care" attitude. Where does that come from? How can I keep it in check? I'm doing ok now and have been for a year, but I don't want to slip back. My recent slips, minor at that which put me up 6 pounds in a week pointed out to me how ready my body is to go back to obesity. I have trained it well over the years. I feel sure of my mind strength today, but what about tomorrow? I know I need to press on "one day at a time" to be successful. I need to preservere slowly, steadily, calmly. I think I let myself get panicky by staying at the same weight for so long. Really, what is wrong with staying at the same weight for years if that weight is 185 and not 270. I plan to relax and practice acceptance. Not stop eating and exercising in a healthy way, but accept each day for what it is. I love being in the 180's. I WILL relax and enjoy it. I love being healthy. I WILL relax and enjoy it. I love cooking healthfully. I WILL relax and enjoy.
I will remain diligent but calm. I AM recovering. I WILL NOT go back.