CURLYMARIE  
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Stress, backsliding, ... not gonna give up.

Monday, August 17, 2009

So the last half of last week was a write-off. emoticon

There was some minor stress with family members coupled with changes in my normal day (picnics in the park, eating out, barbecues at friend's houses, ... ). I'm also starting to gear up for back to school which brings a whole range of emotions with it. Tracking didn't happen, sparking didn't happen, and poor eating habits certainly did. emoticon What's even worse is I had a big rah-rah, I'm going to have a great week blog last week. emoticon

BUT, it was a couple of days. Not weeks or months. And I'm not going to let it be one day more. I haven't gotten on the scale to see what damage was done, if any. I am standing tall, facing my demons of cravings, negative self-talk, and loss of momentum and saying "Back off! Not this time, bucko!" emoticon

I've fallen off the spark wagon before. A year from now I want to be able to say that I wobbled a few times, but I didn't fall down. Not that I lost all my momentum and motivation again.

I'm in this for the long haul. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KNITSTRONG 8/25/2009 1:10PM

    Maybe we should just call ourselves "weebles". Remember those from when your kids were small? "Weebles wobble but they don't fall down."

I may be weebling and wobbling, but I'm trying to use to my "natural bottom roundness" to not fall down! emoticon

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CMB2048 8/19/2009 11:28AM

    Marie, I fell off the wagon too! For me it was the start of the week. I had Orientation Day for our new teachers and just had so much to do, I let everything slide. But I love the wobble but don't fall down mantra and I am going to say it all day today as I get back on track!

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REBECKY44 8/18/2009 6:31PM

    Way to GO! What a great blog Marie! I am proud of you! You are so right, it was only a couple days and not a month or a year! You are right back on track and I know that we CAN do this together!

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LIGHTHEART09 8/17/2009 7:22PM

    I know what you mean...I am having a heck of a week this week...

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 8/17/2009 6:10PM

    You make a great Weeble. Weebles wobble but they don't fall down.
Live healthy, live strong!
Cyndi

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KALATHIA 8/17/2009 5:52PM

    Good for you, Marie! Remember, the only way you can fail at this is if you give up! So, jump right back on the old Spark wagon! We're movin' out and you're comin' with us!

Kath

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JOSEPHINE1231 8/17/2009 3:28PM

    "Wobbled but I didn't fall down"... Good for you. Over the years I have learned to be kinder to myself when I backslide. Life happens. There will always be stress and social situations. The main thing is a system that helps you change your habits for the long term. So that when life happens, you eat less, make somewhat better choices, or, if all else fails, pick yourself up and go forward again.

Jo

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BESTSUSIEYET 8/17/2009 2:05PM

    Good thinking -- be kind to yourself, but get back on track! Plan ahead this week, and you can make up for last week's UGH days. You can do this!!! emoticon

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WISLNDR 8/17/2009 9:42AM

    Isn't it great that the past is over and today is a chance for a fresh start?? Thanks for sharing your blog!

emoticon

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JULANMAT 8/17/2009 8:30AM

  Part of the battle is acknowledging right away what we've done and not justifying it. I had the same weekend - big family pot luck style picnic and we have some good cooks in our family! Anyway, like you I plan to get right back on track. Thanks for sharing.

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#82 - I am losing weight because I'm tired of the back aches

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

I am reflecting on two of my reasons each week, picking them randomly.

82) I am losing weight because Iím tired of the back aches.

I have to admit that my back has gotten better over the past year or so as my two-year-old became a three-year-old and then a four-year-old. Less carrying definitely helped. (He was over 10 pounds at birth and the growth rate didnít slow down! emoticon )

However, carrying extra weight around my middle as well as on my chest and ďderriereĒ is definitely not good for my back. Itís like carrying around a poorly packed, overstuffed backpack all day, every day. Itís bad for my posture, which in turn hurts my back. I slouch, shift weight onto one hip, and lean on walls, counters, and tables far too much. This extra weight could end up having long term consequences for my back.

Thatís why Iím losing weight. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KALATHIA 8/15/2009 4:58PM

    Great reason, Marie! Keep up the good work!

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KERRIEH2 8/15/2009 9:15AM

    I know what you mean by a sore back, my grandson seems to be getting heavier and heavier and therefore my back is getter sore. I too am looking forward when that is not a problem any more
Love Kerrie

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LIGHTHEART09 8/13/2009 3:37PM

    Yes I will have to include that one on my list of why to loose this belly!

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CMB2048 8/13/2009 1:00PM

    My back has also started to hurt more as I gained weight. It is at the top of my list for restarting my SparkPage/People effort. Thanks for reminding us of these important reason why we are all trying to get healthy!

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 8/12/2009 1:40PM

    I have to admit, that my back has been hurting less as well as I've lost the weight. Getting that extra pressure off your body is a great reason.
Live healthy, live strong!
Cyndi

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BETHSHEALTH 8/12/2009 9:33AM

    Good point, I completely understand. Been overweight all my life and had a back issue even in junior high. That's been a long time. I've found that the water seems to have helped me with the back issue too.

Did you write a list of 100 reasons? I'll have to check out your page and see if you have a list there. I'm thinking a list like that is a really good idea.

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LKRAUSE2 8/12/2009 8:59AM

  Thats a great reason to lose weight! I am going to borrow that one...I am tired of the backaches...and I am encouraged that the weight loss is relieving some of your pain.

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Motivation Burst and an Aha!

Monday, August 10, 2009

I got on the scale yesterday and saw a 1 in the third spot. emoticon

I really want to be in the 220's by the late August and when I've lost 15 pounds I'm rewarding myself with a haircut and highlights (I need it anyways, so I might as well make it a reward, lol). I am now less than 2 pounds away from reaching both goals. emoticon

It's funny what that knowledge has done to my motivation and will power. Both were still pretty good at this point, but knowing how close I am to those goals has given a turbo boost to my determination. emoticon

I will drink pools full of water this week. I will go on my nightly power walk and find other ways to do cardio. I will do my scheduled strength training no matter what. I will stay in my ranges for calories and all nutrients. I will check off all of my daily goals every evening. I will not eat any of the 3 pounds of chocolate that my dad gave us emoticon (don't ask) or the yummy dessert loaves that my mom sent along with them. When I step onto the scale next Sunday I will know that I did everything that I needed to do to ensure a loss. (And if it isn't enough I'll do it all over again next week emoticon ).

So here's my "aha!" moment; I was wishing that there was a way of applying this same level of focus and commitment to the big picture. I mean, it's easy to stay motivated for a week when you've got less than 2 pounds to lose, but the 90+ over the next 11 months ....... I already value the SP idea of setting smaller goals and rewards for yourself, but I realized that I haven't really been doing that on a weekly basis. I think that I will start. I know that I could lose 2 pounds a week, so I will set a goal of 1.6 and give myself a mini reward, something free. Maybe more scrapping time or some other form of pampering. emoticon

I'm in this for the long haul, but that doesn't mean I should forget about all the little stops along the way!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REBECKY44 8/11/2009 6:03PM

    Great Blog! I like looking at the little picture instead of the big picture too. I have 7 pounds more to lose to reach 'one-derland'... then I will look at the number after that, but until now... just 7 more to go. So keep your eyes on that little number dropping 1 at a time and be happy... because it means that you are doing it!

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CMB2048 8/11/2009 12:20PM

    Great way to outline the tough job it is to get healthy but how to motivate yourself along the way!

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GRANDMA_NANNY 8/10/2009 11:24PM

    Aha, you have it! Great Job!

You are so correct in celebrating the little goals along the way. You can do it!

Paula

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LIGHTHEART09 8/10/2009 3:03PM

    You go girl!!! We get there cinch by inch...lol emoticon

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 8/10/2009 2:41PM

    I think you may be onto something. Small rewards along the way can really help motivation.
Cyndi

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#64 - the bathing suit thing

Friday, August 07, 2009

I am reflecting on two of my reasons each week, picking them randomly.

64) I am losing weight because I want to look good in a bathing suit and wear it in public without needing a cover-up. emoticon

I donít wear a bathing suit very often. Not because of weight-related self-consciousness Ö we only really have 3 months of outdoor swimming weather, if that. Iím not into lying around tanning (can you say ďmelanomaĒ?) and wouldnít have the time even if I was.

I would like to be more confident in my bathing suit when I do wear one, though.

We went away for a few days at the start of July. As usual, we stayed at a hotel with a pool. The kids threw on their suits in our room and were ready to head down. I was faced with the realization that I would need to ride the elevator down ten flights and walk along a long hallway. Getting the mental picture? Pale, fat chick in a bathing suit and sandals. Not good. So, I wore shorts and a t-shirt over my suit and got them soaking wet in the way back up.

I want to feel confident enough to wear my suit and not give a second thought to what others might be thinking (though I would probably still cover up in a hotel elevator Ö emoticon). I have a suit that I wore when I was a healthy weight. I want to fit into it again.

Thatís why Iím losing weight.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REBECKY44 8/9/2009 11:08PM

    BIG SIGH! I know... the bathing suit thing. That's a really good reason!

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LIGHTHEART09 8/8/2009 12:55PM

    I know how you feel...I am a swimmer and hang out at my pool when it is nice...so I live in my suit...but since sp I have noticed I am firmer so that is a good sign...I have a long way to go, but we are firmer....baby steps!!!

Really to pull off the bathing suit deal I think it is all about Confidence...when I go take a swim and there is a bizillion people at the beach...I remove my over blouse cover up and lift my head high don my blue aqua jogger and go for that 60 min calorie burning swim...They may smerk, but they are on their asses sitting when I get back from my hour swim...so neener neener to them...plus most of the skinny ones are in their teens and 20's ...hey I am in my mid 50's and hitting it hard...and doiing something about it I can be proud. emoticon

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KARITIGER 8/7/2009 5:09PM

    Heya.. here's some food for thought.. pay attention to how you feel. Yes looking good feels great but getting out there and doing what you love.. don't let anything hold ya back.. there's only one way to get there and that's by putting one foot in front of the other.. and get out there and do your thang.. so if you have cellulite or are more peary than hourglass so what.. try to notice the spring in your step and the way you can move faster this time or go longer.. and I bet you'll find your smile no matter what size suit you are wearing or what have you.. Good for you doing it anyway!

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MEME102 8/7/2009 3:22PM

    yep swimsuits would be a good reason to want to lose!! Good for you!!
You will meet your goals...just stick with it...
PL

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 8/7/2009 2:01PM

    Feeling confident enough to wear whatever we want is a great reason to lose weight. I think I'd also still throw on a cover up of some sort or at least throw a towel around myself going down an elevator to get to the pool. Keep up your great work and I know you will get there!
Live healthy, live strong!
Cyndi

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OPERAJAN 8/7/2009 10:26AM

  This year I went swimming for the first time in ages and realized that while I still have a ways to go, I am no longer the biggest girl at the pool. Little things mean a lot. Keep working it, you're worth it!

emoticon

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PENNYROYALTY 8/7/2009 9:35AM

    i used to feel a lot like you. i love the pool, the water, but i don't love me so much in a swim suit. but you know, lately, i've stopped caring about what other people think! I don't know if it's just getting a bit older or if it's SP or if it's just being sick of miossing the water because of something so petty. But i've been swimming all summer long now with not a care in the world. I know i don't look the best in a swimsuit, but i know for a fact that i don't look the worst! best of luck turning your swimsuit into a friend!

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Starving! - and I still made good choices

Thursday, August 06, 2009

I dropped my oldest off at her friend's house and went to run some errands this morning. I lost my list so it took me a bit longer as I tried to remember everything that I had written on it. I had one of my trusty water bottles emoticon with me. My last stop was the grocery store. I needed to stock up on my salad making supplies emoticon emoticon emoticon and some things for the kids' suppers. I was pretty hungry by that point and had to resist several urges to buy certain "health" foods that looked like they might be good. (I really love nutrition labels! emoticon)

By the time I got home I was sooooo hungry. You know that shaky feeling you get when you are overly hungry? That was me. I had a plan to make a salad for lunch, but first I had to put the groceries away. And the kids hadn't had lunch yet. And the phone was ringing. And ... you get the picture. It was so tempting to grab something - anything!! - and worry about figuring out the calories later. Instead, I pointed out to myself that making a salad would take less than 10 minutes, not an hour. I could wait. And I did.

The salad was worth the wait. And the weight. emoticon When I finished it I was still hungry, but I also realised that sometimes when you get that hungry it can take a while to get over it, so I ignored my hunger and sat down to track my nutrition instead of grabbing something else to munch. Pretty soon I felt full.

I'm rather proud of myself, if I do say so myself. I know that I can use this experience to motivate myself the next time that the going gets tough. After all, if I can exert will power and resist temptation when I'm starving, I should be able to do it the rest of the time! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIGHTHEART09 8/8/2009 3:32PM

    Great job!!! YOu are on your way girl!

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LILSUNFLOWER 8/7/2009 4:05AM

    Way to go!

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GRANDMA_NANNY 8/6/2009 11:59PM

    Well done! You are doing great. Keep it up.

Did you get some protein with your salad? Protein usually helps curb hunger longer than just the great carbs and all that fiber.

You might want to find some quick, healthy snack to keep on hand. I sometimes find that when I grab a snack before going into the grocery store I feel much better when I shop.

Good Luck on this journey!
Paula

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KALATHIA 8/6/2009 6:22PM

    Good for YOU!!!! You're absolutely right about waiting for the hunger to pass. It takes about 20 minutes for the message that you're full to travel from your stomach to your brain! You made a great choice and will be rewarded for it!

Kathy

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REBECKY44 8/6/2009 4:35PM

    That was great control. You know when you get that shaky feeling it's sometimes caused by low blood sugar. If you just drink 4 oz of O.J. it would stop that shaky feeling. Remember to keep some handy-dandy snacks close by.

Hugs to you!
Becky

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WILLA3 8/6/2009 2:22PM

    Wow! Nice job staying in control. You sidestepped so many opportunities to blow it and waited to prepare something healthy and delicious and then sat down to enjoy it. You are strengthening your resolve. Way to go!

My old self always ate something on the way home from the grocery store. Now I tell myself, I'm not that person anymore, I can wait.

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