CUBANJELLY   11,237
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CUBANJELLY's Recent Blog Entries

I'm trying...

Saturday, April 05, 2014

Hi all,

Sorry for my absence. Life. 2010 brought some difficult emotional times, throwing me off balance completely. I'm finally getting my bearings back. Just finished my BA in Psychology - now I can focus on the outside of me!

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It's been a long time since I've been around. I hope I can find my way again. 180 lbs, size 14-16 - not happy with those numbers AT ALL!

Finally started running again, having some knee and feet issues, but will persevere! I look forward to reconnecting with everyone, meeting new friends and definitely being encouraged and encouraging others on our journey.

I'm making a come back!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SIXFOOT1 4/13/2014 6:18PM

    It's because of you that I did my first sprint triathlon in 2010. I've done 11 since. Glad to see you back. :-)

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MALCONTENTION 4/8/2014 9:47AM

    Great to see you here again! And congrats on your degree!

Comment edited on: 4/8/2014 9:54:57 AM

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CUBANJELLY 4/7/2014 5:13PM

    Thanks you guys. It means a lot. :)

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FITGIRL15 4/7/2014 3:26PM

    We all have struggles in life, and I personally think it's OK to allow these things to come first! As long as we constantly get back to our healthy habits, it all comes back!

Here's to finding your healthy lifestyle forever!!! We are here to help you! emoticon

MISSED YOU!

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REMEMBER2BME 4/7/2014 1:30PM

    emoticon So glad to have you back. You know we are here for you. One step at a time my friend.

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LIGHTNINGRUNNER 4/7/2014 10:31AM

    Welcome back. You can do it. We all seem to take time off you aren't alone. Can't wait to hear about your progress and plans.

Go slowly when coming back to running.

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CDNMSFIT 4/7/2014 9:39AM

   

Welcome back!

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CUBANJELLY 4/5/2014 12:14PM

    THANKS!!!

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PJ2222 4/5/2014 11:39AM

    emoticon emoticon

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MOTTAMAMALOU 4/5/2014 11:37AM

    emoticon I hope your journey is a happy, healthy one. Take care.

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Wow, it's been a long time - you need a quick update....

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I just read my last blog entry. Some things have changed...

My dad passed away in March - 4 months after my mom. He had a heart attack from flipping out because nobody would come to his party... My mom was the brake for him, he was obviously getting out of control pretty quick.

The following is a short recap of events - they will be completely unbelievable and if they hadn't happened to me, I'd have a hard time believing them too... My dad was stripped of his money and jewelry, placed in his car and driven back to his house. His dead body was propped in a chair until they could get a coffin - which was a large fish box (he lived in a fishing village). They have no funeral home, no embalming and therefore the funeral had to be ASAP. One brother had a passport and was able to make it there by hiring a private plane just before they buried him. He had to hire professional mourners to weep in the house, they paraded the body through town three times and he was finally put to rest in a plot deep in a wooded area (which my brother has since cleared and placed a headstone). Some of his jewelry was returned, no, I did not get his wedding ring which was all I wanted - to match with my mom's. We have 1 year (6 months now) to sell the house otherwise it goes to the government. They have squaters rights so my brother had to hire people to live there and change the locks.

Yeah, i stopped....everything. LOL

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITGIRL15 8/24/2011 10:36AM

    OMG... that is right, what a story! (I mean, your life! It does read like a novel, or a movie script!)

How are YOU doing & your immediate family? Hubby & the kids? (Or has this affected you the worst?) I can't even imagine your pain & how aweful it would be to have to go through such an ordeal! Understandibly you quit everything else to focus on your family!!!

If you need anything, please, message me!!! XOXO emoticon emoticon

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HEALTHY4JEANNE 8/24/2011 10:06AM

    You have been through so much this year....
A time for healing.
Jeanne

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IFDEEVARUNS2 8/24/2011 9:15AM

    You're right, reads like a novel. Sorry for your loss - two so close together is really rough.
Welcome back! emoticon

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I'm trying - and I'm happy with that.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I gaines 20lbs when my mom got hospitalized and have done absolutely nothing to get rid of it. At that time (November 2010) I was up to 6 miles training for a half-marathon (would've been my first). I basically quit...everything. This week I have gone to the track twice and run my first solid mile each day. Taken a Zumba class and taught a Yoga class. Made arrangements for a twice a week full-body weight lifting partner and my nutrition is trying to make a comeback. Yeah, I'm proud of me!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARATHON_MOM 9/23/2011 8:41AM

    I'm proud of you too!!! Look out world... she's BAAAAAACK~!

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GRACIE4ONE 9/23/2011 5:47AM

    And i'm proud of you, too! TTYL

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MALCONTENTION 8/25/2011 7:50AM

    Yes, you should be! Don't worry if you find your steps need to be small ones--that might even be better than trying to take lots of stuff on at once. You've been through a super tough patch, but with time you'll get back to where you were. I have faith in you!

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FITGIRL15 8/24/2011 10:42AM

    Woo Hoo, Peggy! Rock it out, Girl!!! You can DO IT, get back to YOU!!! Life can be so stressful (Lawd, don't I know it!) but eventually, things do heal and we do move forward again... sounds like you have started that process! XXOXOO

PS... the background picture is awesome! What are you doing? Is that seriously part of your race? Insane!

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HEALTHY4JEANNE 8/24/2011 10:07AM

    Woo Hoo I am so incredibly proud of you!
:) jeanne

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IFDEEVARUNS2 8/24/2011 9:16AM

    You can be very proud! emoticon emoticon

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RUNTRILAUGH 8/24/2011 9:09AM

    You should be!

And ps - your background pic made me smile!!!!!!!!!!!!



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To ALL my Spark Friends

Friday, November 19, 2010

THANK YOU! For all your kind comments, encouragement and prayers. You've all really been here for me and I sincerely appreciate it. I wish I could sit down and spend all day personally thanking each of you, sending you goodies and encouragement, but we all know it's ok if I don't - thank you!

It's been a tough month, but hopefully it's winding down. I'm not nearly as stressed. Just have a lot to catch up on (mostly laundry - yuk). We cleaned out my dad's apartment yesterday, got his furniture (which is better than our old furniture), selling the car and finishing up paperwork, gravestone stuff, loose ends.

I'm sleeping, which is always a good thing. Thinking positive thoughts, planning a run tomorrow and a salad and baked turkey for our Sunday School potluck. Dean's been very encouraging and just this morning reminded me I'd have loose jeans in no time. He's such an amazing person. I'm so grateful for him.

My dad called this morning. He's home (in Mexico) and said he's doing ok, plugging along. I can't live with unforgiveness and bitterness - it only hurts me and he's completely oblivious and going senile so what's the point in harboring bad feelings.

Getting passports next week. Lots of church people seem interested in taking a trip over there - this whole situation has affected a lot of people around me.

Soon, I'll be back Sparking like crazy, I hope! My computer's getting a new harddrive, so I'm on Dixie's, so I won't be here much for a bit yet.

Love to all my awesome Spark Girlfriends!!! Couldn't have made it through this without you - and yeah, I'm serious!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CMB2048 1/4/2011 11:19PM

    Resubscribing...

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CMB2048 12/30/2010 12:07PM

    Hoping things are going well!

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HEALTHY4JEANNE 11/22/2010 3:05PM

    Peg,
Huge hugs.
:) Jeanne

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NUTRIGIRL08 11/22/2010 1:41PM

    emoticon

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REMEMBER2BME 11/19/2010 6:22PM

    I am just glad so proud that you have such a healthy attitude, the best attitude as I see it. You have done a fantastic job managing all of this.

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Comment edited on: 11/19/2010 6:22:28 PM

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DANEDA 11/19/2010 1:38PM

    You sound good - I am so glad! You're just a wonderful person, you know that?

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FITGIRL15 11/19/2010 1:17PM

    This post puts my mind at ease! You sound like you are doing MUCH better!!!

I care about you, Peggy!!! I'm glad Dean is there for your emotional well being! He sounds like a great man!

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RAWKNRUN 11/19/2010 12:19PM

    Huge hugs honey, I am sorry and sending lots of love and hugs.

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GRACIE4ONE 11/19/2010 12:06PM

    YOU STINK! emoticon. Just kidding, just wanted to rile your feathers!!! LOL....!

Comment edited on: 5/17/2011 12:45:19 AM

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LIGHTNINGRUNNER 11/19/2010 11:05AM

    Thinking about you - You will get back to a new normal soon - don't rush it as it will be waiting for you.

Take Care.

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MARATHON_MOM 11/19/2010 10:54AM

    I love you, girl. Praying for you still. I know this loss is hard. If you need anything, please let me know.

Glad you are getting back to the running and Sparking, and that things seem to be leveling out some.

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COUNTRYNETTERS 11/19/2010 10:50AM

    emoticon You are always there for everyone else! :) Time for you to reap the benefits of Spark friends! Keep your chin up!

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RUNTRILAUGH 11/19/2010 10:39AM

    Anytime girl! You know we're always here for ya!

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Getting Back My Normal

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

We took my mom off life-support - that was hard, very hard - watching her die. That sucked. Having to buy 2x size clothes for her, alone, sucked almost more. All the fluids from the iv's had just swelled her to 3-4 times her normal size. The funeral was beautiful. My pastor, who I owe a debt I will never be able to repay, did the entire service in spanish - our native tongue. He doesn't speak a word of it and did an amazing job - everyone was elated, it changed the entire atmosphere. He even sang in spanish! He rocks! The funeral home was outstanding! If you get a chance read my blog around this time last year about funeral homes (Dean's mother passed last year).

Now, I'm left with paying off my dad's car, trying to sell it. Making sure he's ok - from here in FL when he's in Mexico - which is damn near impossible. He left from the cemetery. He doesn't cope. I'll most likely never see him again. It is what it is.

I can't seem to get back in the groove - I know I should give myself time. My pants are tight and that nasty green bean casserole is still in the fridge - damn white people food! I ate an entire cherry pie yesterday, I won't buy another one. If I could get someone to go grocery shopping for me, cut up all the fruit and fix me a salad, I'd eat it, but I'm just so exhausted. Housework out the yazoo, trying to get homeschooling back on track. It's just a lot right now.

I want to run, but I don't want to run. I'd rather just lay in bed all day sippin' a margarita and watching movies!

I'm going to give myself another week then no more excuses, hit it hard, shape up and fit back into everything before the Thanksgiving Feast!

Thanks to all my Spark Girls for your encouragement, love and prayers - I felt everyone of them!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ECHAVEZ2 6/13/2011 12:33PM

    I'm sorry for your loss, especially losing your mother. That is tough! emoticon
You've done the right thing by taking care of yourself and running. Therapists I know say that running and exercising is VERY HEALTHY for the spirit. Crying while running to let go of the hurt and pain, and smiling at the end of the run is very helpful in making it through each day; one day at a time. Dad's are who they are, but stay as connected as possible with your husband, family, and life. They are really need you as much as you need them.

I've been out of spark for one school year since I had a really rough year also. I'm back; better in mind and spirit and out and running to conquer 23 lbs of stress weight. Take care and blessing to you and your family. BE STRONG! emoticon emoticon

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TIGGERRD 1/9/2011 4:20PM

    Peggy, you've been to he** and back, so forgive yourself all those ugly feelings that you had to go through and get to the other side. Your SP buddies are here for you - every one of us offering up hugs and good wishes. I just hope you're coming back to SP soon - you're missed. Hoping all is well - really hoping you're doing ok.

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ENERGETICMOMOF4 12/4/2010 8:38PM

    I'm so sorry to hear of your mother's passing. God bless and be with you and your dear family.

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PBGWILLIAMS 12/1/2010 3:49PM

    I've been away for a bit. I'm catching up slowly and just read your blog. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Take the time you need to grieve and get back to the swing of things. What a blessing you were able to be with her at the end...what a wonderful daughter you are. Do what you can for your Dad, I have a father that also doesn't cope-WITH ANYTHING!!! Keep working at it and you wont regret a thing. You can't control other people-unfortunately!! LOL.

Love you girl and thinking and praying for you! Hugs!


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ISABELLA35 11/20/2010 9:33PM

    Hi Peggy,

I have been away from SP for a while and just getting back into it myself. I am so sorry to hear about your mom's passing. I got teary eyed just reading your blogs about her visit and passing. I think you need to take some time to grieve and heal. You have been through a lot and I'm sorry that your dealings with your father haven't been positive. I think deep down perhaps your father has been dealing with his own issues but not dealing with them in a healthy or constructive manner. He probably doesn't know how to because of how he was raised, and what he knows. It's unfortunate.

I hope that you are doing better. I will say a prayer for you and your family. Keep strong and positive.

Hugs :)

Comment edited on: 11/20/2010 9:40:32 PM

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RAWKNRUN 11/19/2010 12:18PM

    OMG I am so sorry, I can't even believe this, I am glad you got to see her but I am so sad about the way she went. I am just so sorry I wish I could hug you.

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DEEJACKSON 11/19/2010 12:16PM

    OMG, I am sooooo sorry! I saw today's blog (11/19) and thought.... Huh? What happened?

I am so sorry, I didn't read this sooner. I am glad you are coping again, and I will continue to pray for you, Dean AND your father.

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ETTEZEUS 11/19/2010 10:55AM

    I'm so sorry for all you are going through.It's going to take some time. I know the struggles I went through when I lost my father and then less than a month later, we lost my DH's mother. It was hard....very very hard!!

But I can tell you, it will get better, slowly, and you will feel like yourself again. Just take this time to get yourself back. And don't feel like you need to rush anything.

This is your time to begin healing.

HUGS!

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FITGIRL15 11/18/2010 6:30PM

    Ugh. My heart sinks for you, Peggy!!! I'm sad by your loss! But your pastor made the funeral very memorable for you and all that attended! I am sure your mother would have been sent to tears as well!

Take as much time as you need to recover from this, Peggy! You WILL get through it a stronger woman!

Luv you, Babe! emoticon
(PS... going to a market where they cook fresh foods in healthy ways (like baked yams and steamed asparagus) has saved me this past month from eating bon-bons and cupcakes for dinner every night! Maybe you have a similar market near by that you can utilize during this difficult time!!! It will get better!!)

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CRZYRUNRGRL 11/18/2010 5:03PM

    Give your self some time girl, you have been through a lot and you need to digest it all. I wish I lived closer, I would come and make your salad :)
If you need to chat, im here!

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NUTRIGIRL08 11/18/2010 4:49PM

    emoticonKeep the faith, stay strong, all will work in God's time!

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MANDORA3 11/18/2010 6:34AM

    I do not know how I missed this!!! OMG......HUGE hugs to you!!

Take your time..your body and MIND need it....litlle by little, you will get back in your routine.

"Damn white people food"...this just about made me pee my pants!!!

HUGS!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MALCONTENTION 11/17/2010 5:58PM

    I'm just catching up with all that's been going on with you. SO TOUGH!!! Do allow yourself time to grieve and forgive yourself for some of the bad habits that can accompany grief. I know your awesome husband and kids will be great supports to you.
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HEALTHY4JEANNE 11/17/2010 1:35PM

    Peg,
I am so happy that this funeral was beautiful. I do remember the blogs about your FIL's last year.

now about your mom.
I am so sorry. I know how it feels to lose Mom. I felt like my arm was severed. Part of me died. I was not whole.
Give yourself some time to grieve, but then, do something for you. Carry a picture of your mom and bring her with you. she would want you to be healthy and living life. A good Hike might help you with that.

lots of love,
jeanne



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ELFITZPA 11/17/2010 12:53PM

    I'm so sorry about your Mom, I can't even imagine how tough it's got to be for you right now. I'm glad you're giving yourself a bit more time before getting too strict with yourself. Let yourself grieve, relax, think about happier times. There will be plenty of time to loosen those pants, do your laundry, etc. You've got to take care of you right now.

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DREAMRUNR 11/17/2010 11:17AM

    I am so sorry to hear about our mom. I wish you and your family peace in a time where it can seem like there is none to be found. Give yourself all the time you need. Each day it will get better. Stay strong and know that I am here if there is anything I can do.
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JEM0622 11/17/2010 11:06AM

    I am so very sorry for your loss. Many condolences and hugs. My husband is the executor for his late father's estate (passed in June) so if you need help or just want to chat on all that mess then please reach out. emoticon

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RUNTRILAUGH 11/17/2010 10:55AM

    And this is the season for "damn white people food!"

Love ya girl... you know I wish we were closer to help you! I might even cut up that fruit and make ya a salad...

You know what??? Here's your veggies, salad and a drink!
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Give yourself time. This was a HUGE shift in your world. I know. The same day 12 years ago, I lost my Mom. We were prepared, I can't even imagine the shock you must be going through the way this happened.

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you know we luv ya!!!!

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NINJALINDA 11/17/2010 10:10AM

    emoticon I am SO sorry...I didn't realize you were dealing with this! Give yourself ample time. yeah, you need to get back in the groove, but don't try to force it too soon. You'll be in my prayers...

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LIGHTNINGRUNNER 11/17/2010 8:26AM

    Like you said give yourself some time. Ask for help -

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GRACIE4ONE 11/16/2010 5:05PM

    "Damn white people food?!".......only you would say that, Peg! You are too wild and way off the chain!!! LMAO. And I don't eat it, but when did it get to be a certain "kind" of food? LOL....i can't stop laughing at you. I know black folks who eat that nasty stuff! LOL

Comment edited on: 11/16/2010 5:11:36 PM

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REMEMBER2BME 11/16/2010 1:47PM

    emoticon no really emoticon

I am so sorry for your loss. It is good that you were there for her (as painful as it was for you).

Yes, give yourself time and make sure to reward yourself for each thing you accomplish
- showering
- dishes
- a load of laundry
- 1 mile (huge reward - movie and hot chocolate)
- making a healthy snack

Just one good decision at a time.
We are here to support you any way we can.

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DANEDA 11/16/2010 1:15PM

    If ever there was a time to stay in bed, sip margaritas and watch movies, it's now. Do it. NO excuses.

I am so sorry. What a tumultuous couple of months, and I can't imagine how you feel about your father. I wish I could give you a hug, do the dishes, cut up the fruit, and anything else you need or want to make you feel better.

There are times in life when you need to 'just sit there. do nothing.' Now is one. My heart goes out to you.

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